Another Chapter! I should be able to post several pretty rapidly, can't promise anything crazy long for now though. There is much in store...mwahaha. Beta's by the lovely Issy, enjoy!
He starts by trying to get the guard's attention.
To begin, he stands at the entrance to the statue room (which he ought to call the name printed on the museum floor map: The Main Chamber) and stealthily works his way towards his target. He moves with the precision of a man who has never needed to be stealthy in his life and the confidence of a man who is happy to look ridiculous.
He hides behind a copy of The Thinker by Rodin, and quietly moves on so that he is hidden by Sampson slaying a Philistine by the great Giambologna. (He loves both works with fervour - mainly because of the exquisite muscular form of the nude males…)
The art historian pretends that the guard hasn't noticed him. He can't have done because Feliciano knows he's been extremely sneaky. Besides, it's more fun this way.
Deciding he ought to reveal himself, he moves slowly into the guard's line of sight. There! Those eyes definitely flick to him, albeit briefly.
He coughs once (with utmost subtlety, of course). Again! A brief lapse from that endless focus; eyes glancing his way a second time.
Feeling braver, he moves so he's standing two metres next to the guard. He stands rigid while looking anywhere but at him; the picture of nonchalance. His eyes slide to the right so he can see him out of the corner of his eye. Is he imagining it, or does the blond look twitchier and grumpier than usual? He must be annoying him! A quiet voice within his mind laughs with glee.
Once more averting his eyes, he takes two steps sideways so he is literally about 5 centimetres away from his target.
"Look, do you want something?" The guard says. He's German! Curiouser and curiouser…
"Oh, no no, don't mind me I'm just…admiring the artwork." He replies, shifting his weight back and forth and swinging his arms a little. He is certain he must look exactly like a casual observer.
The tension really radiates off this guy. Feli can feel his mood darkening across the small space between them. In his opinion, there's nothing wrong with letting the silence just stretching on because well, they're just a museum guard and art observer standing and admiring art work. Perfectly normal.
Out of the corner of his eye, he sees a muscle in the German's face twitch.
For several more minutes he goes through many different strategies including the classics: shoelace tying, scratching, running his hands through his hair, fiddling with the buttons on the cuff of his shirt and even twisting his phone in his pocket and tapping his feet.
He can feel the moment the guard changes his rigid stance.
"What is your problem?!" the guard hisses. It's the kind of hiss that is clearly meant to be an intimidating yell, and probably would be if this wasn't a museum.
"No problem at all, Mr Guard. I'm just looking at this beautiful view. Lots of lovely marble in here, don't you think? Such skill in the curve of those muscles and draped marble sheets." Feli sighs. As a side note he adds, "Leaves very little to the imagination too." He ends with a wink.
'Mr Guard' flushes a gorgeous shade of deep red (Feli wonders if that blush extends down his chest too…) He stammers a little for a moment, clearly in shock.
"W-well…if you wouldn't mind moving away a little. You're invading my personal space." He hisses. The blush doesn't fade - to Feli's delight. This is so much fun.
"Oh, I'm sorry! People tell me I can be 'over friendly', but I just like being close to people you know? I think it's nice! Personally I think everyone should be more friendly, then we would all be happier." He says while grinning. The blond looks so lost.
"That's nice…yes. Now if you don't mind, I am on my shift and I don't want any distractions."
"Oh, come oooon, distractions from what? Staring grumpily into the distance?"
"What? I do not…stare grumpily."
"You do. You do little else actually, in all the times I've seen you I don't think you've so much as blinked."
"That's not true! Of course I blink." The guard says, looking flustered and bewildered. He has clearly not met many Italians before. For a second, Feli considers taking him to Italy. Just to see him flounder.
"Look! You're evading the accusation! Everyone knows you're the grumpy guard. And besides it's not like you have any distractions I mean, nothing happens here. All you have to do is sit for hours."
The blond is clearly at a loss for words. Feli assumes he's not very good with them as a general rule. He decides that he has flustered up this german a good deal for today.
"It has been very nice talking to you, Grumpy german guard. My name is Feliciano! And I'll leave you alone now, ciao!" With a sort-of nod he twirls away elegantly and leaves the bewildered guard staring after him as he leaves.
Thank you for reading! More to come, much more. Reviews are love :D