Bit fast paced but I thought it was funny, also edited last chapter, grammar and the like, bah.
Lelouch vi Britannia was exhausted, a day that had been dedicated to gambling and drinking with his man servant...err...friend Rivalz ended with him in the back a terrorists truck, involved in a major auto accident, and nearly shot a dozen times over by his own countrymen. Given, it wasn't the first time the latter happened but just because he had prior experience with such an occurrence didn't mean he was in a rush to relive it. After an act of happenstance he'd managed to somehow acquire what he would begrudgingly call a magic power and had used it to lead an effective counter offensive until some Brittanian super weapon entered the scene. Despite his best efforts he was circumvented by this new contender and ended the day in check so he'd decided to cut out the middleman and murder his brother himself, who knows maybe he'd get some answers to some long sought after questions.
With that thought he gingerly walked past the groups of ghouls devouring Clovis' fallen soldiers; for some reason despite the armor he was wearing they would just glance at him with glassy milk white eyes then promptly ignore him. Shuddering to himself as he navigated the blood splattered halls of the G-1 mobile base he stopped at the command center door and clicked it open, he was met with shrill screams that sounded like a pig being slaughtered. After a few seconds of this it cut off and was replaced with a woman's voice tsking softly, Lelouch leaned into the room to see an attractive young lady leaning over his brothers piss and vomit soaked form.
"Clovy Clovy Clovy, may I call you Clovy? Hasn't anyone taught you how to beg for your life before? When a witch is threatening to kill you one must give said woman a reason to let you live, either by offering her something worthwhile or at the very least, *heh,* find some way to amuse her. Now I ask you again, are you a pretty little princess? Crucio," she spat this last bit out as she jabbed his forehead with a stick, causing the blonde man to wail again. The shear...bizzareness of the situation caused Lelouch to snort a small laugh, of all the times for his dark sense of humor to rear its head, the woman turned to Lelouch and met his eyes causing his breath to catch in his chest.
Staring into the glowing emeralds he felt he recognized the anger, rage, guilt, touch of madness, and amusement in them, after all he saw the exact same thing in his mirror every morning, the woman raised a brow as she broke the silence.
"Well...aren't you interesting, see my inferni will only attack those they perceive as a threat, despite wearing that uniform you're being ignored...yes quite interesting," with that she pointed her stick at him and drawled out, "Legillimens." They both cried in agony as a cascade of images slammed through their heads, Lelouch was overwhelmed with the life of a woman who was violated, abused, and tortured by her guardians who she had thus murdered at the tender age of six. Reeling back he absorbed her triumphs and failures as she played the world around her building an insurrection that led to a revolution bringing equality and progress at the cost of blood and chaos.
For her part Lillith was beaten down with the images of a boy prince who was betrayed and discarded by his own family and left to die in the wake of his fathers conquests, the only thing leaving the jaded young man sane was caring for his crippled sister. He was plotting, planning, and this...thing...this strange power grafted to his weak magical core now gave him the chance to provide the world his little sister deserved. Using occulamancy to quickly process this new information Lillith broke out into laughter,
"Holy hell this reality has magic...well...at least squibs, and apparently green haired tarts that can give boys with yummy firm arses a bastardized version of mental magic...interesting...interesting..." Lelouch...huh, she knew his name as well, Lelouch shakily stood tall staring at the woman in shock,
"What exactly are you?" Smirking she curtsied elegantly,
"Well, with the muggle conversion of titles I am the Countess of Slytherin Lillith Potter-Black-Peverell, the last of four dynasties, also I'm a witch complete with wands, pointed hats, cauldrons, and brooms." Lelouch processed this than gave her a cheeky smile,
"What no black cats?" Snorting she rolled her eyes as she leaned against a console while crossing her arms, he did his best to ignore the way it pushed her breasts up.
"No I have...ugh had an owl, stupid dimension jumping, Sally-Anne had a black cat though, Hermione had a keazle but he was ugly as sin, never knew what she saw in the little bastard." Before he could respond to this strange admission they were interrupted by Clovis's groans as he started to regain his composure, Lelouch lost his good humor as he stalked towards his half brother.
"I have some questions I need answers to, I hope you didn't damage him too much," she snorted and rolled her eyes at this,
"Lelouch I was just in your head I know exactly what you wanna ask him, the only thing he knows about Lady Marianne's death is that Schnitzle...Schneider...err..." speaking up he provided,
"Schneizal?" Smiling brilliantly she pointed to him while nodding enthusiastically,
"Yeah, that guy was put in charge of your mum's body, your sister Cornelia who by the way, total hottie, might know something since she was your mum's head of security but she was rather vocal about your old man cancelling the investigation so chances are she doesn't know anything." Nodding Lelouch stared at the soiled blonde man as he tried to retake his footing,
"Why did he order the deaths of all these innocents?" Scowling the raventette woman sniffed disdainfully before replying,
"And quote the ponce 'They're just Elevens', I will admit that is when I lost my temper and started torturing him," Lelouch nodded as he pulled his pistol and aimed it at his half brothers head.
"Than there is no reason for him to live..." as he began to squeeze the trigger Lillith grabbed his wrist and took the pistol, meeting his gaze she grinned wickedly,
"My dear boy, you have potential but you need to learn the difference between killing your enemies, and destroying them," quirking a brow he gestured towards the babbling blonde,
"Than please, enlighten me oh wise one," snorting she slapped his bum while walking towards Clovis muttering,
"Cheeky bugger," pointing her stick...rather wand at Clovis Lelouch watched in shock as the mans soiled clothes became a fine ladies dress complete with stockings and heels, twitching her wand a bit more the man suddenly had a complete makeover including makeup and a perm. Cackling to herself she than fished into her purse and handed Clovis a tube of lipstick, muttering "Imperio" she than directed him to write 'I'M A PRETTY LITTLE PRINCSS!' on the wall behind his command chair.
Handing the blonde man Lelouch's pistol she twitched her wand a few times and suddenly Clovis sat in his chair while his hand swung the gun to his head and pulled the trigger blowing his brains across the far wall. Snickering she bellowed something in latin, the ghouls all left the corpses and began shuffling away, hooking her arm through Lelouch's she muttered under her breath as she jabbed to the various dead bodies and pools of blood. After cleaning every room of the G-1 base she entered the hanger which was now filled with the undead, she cast some sort of fire spell on the assembled corpses reducing them all to ashes.
A few wand waves later the ashes all vanished, suddenly the massive mobile fortresses sole occupant was one cross dressing prince who had apparently committed suicide, still chuckling Lillith wrapped an arm around Lelouch and he suddenly felt like something had gripped his navel and pulled him through a narrow tube. Gasping as they appeared before the door to his rooms in the student council center of the Ashford Academy Lelouch managed to get out,
"What...what the bloody fucking hell did I get myself into?!" Smirking the green eyed vixen grabbed him by the chin and leaned in kissing him deeply, Lelouch's eyes widened then closed as he leaned into her embrace. After a moment she pulled back and cocked an eyebrow,
"You'll do lover boy, been awhile since I ran into a man I could actually respect, I'm going to need about a week to get my new identity set up, see you inside and make sure you hug your sister back." With that she pulled a chain from her cleavage with a pendant that resembled a complex hourglass hanging from it, spinning it a few times she met his amethyst gaze with her emerald and winked as she vanished. Near hyperventilating Lelouch tore off the Britannian armor and threw it all behind the hedges, adjusting the collar of his uniform he pushed the door to he and Nunnally's apartment open.
"Nunnally...I'm home sister, how was your day?" Looking up he felt his heart leap into his throat as he saw Lillath wearing short shorts and a t-shirt sporting kanji reading "Jet Set Radio" getting her toe nails painted by his tanned little sister who was sitting cross legged on the floor. Tanned. Cross legged. Floor. Nunnally turned her head to meet Lelouch's gaze her beautiful violet eyes filled with joy,
"Nii-san!" She hopped up and rushed across the room diving into her brothers arms, trying to process all that was going on he registered Lillith's throaty cackling as Nunnally looked up at him with tears at the corners of her eyes, "Your new girlfriend is awesome!"