Disclaimer: Vampire Knight does not, has not, and will not ever belong to me. I only ask that nobody take my characters or ideas.

Not my Time
A Vampire Knight Fanfiction

Chapter Five: To Guard or Not to Guard

I picked up the red colored pencil in front of me on the living room rug and held it up for my mother to see. "What's this, Mama?" I asked.

My mother smiled as she answered, "It's red."

The answer did not satisfy me, so I frowned and asked again, "No. What is it?"

In response to my emphasized question, my mother furrowed her brow in confusion. Then she suddenly realized what I wanted to know. "Ah… Red is used to show anger or pain. That's why you should use red wisely. Drawing is you on paper, and you wouldn't like to always be angry, right?"

I nodded, reconsidering the use of red in my picture. "If I had to use red for every picture I drew, that would be bad."

"Yes, it would be… Let's both hope that you never encounter red."

…

As an artist, I thought I had known what red was, but after seeing Kaname's red eyes, I realized I knew nothing. The anger and pain I described with red was nothing in comparison to his. Even my father's anger faded in comparison. The idea of Kaname taking his rage out on me was unbearable, but for a moment all I could do was stare. The color of his eyes entranced me; at first my only concern was how I could possibly find the right blend of colors to match the color of his eyes. The purpose of my mad dash to the Headmaster's office was pushed to the back of my mind, and the strange words of the Night Class student were forgotten.

After another moment, Kaname took a step toward me, and before I could stop myself, I shrieked. It was brief, much to my own relief, and soon afterward reality came rushing back to me: The headmaster abruptly rising from his chair, the sound of running feet behind me; Kaname's red eyes holding me hostage. It all seemed like a bizarre dream that was about to become a nightmare.

Just when I'd thought that the situation couldn't possibly get worse, Ichijou Takuma appeared in the doorway, still trying to catch his breath from his run across the school. "Kaname! Is everything all right?" Even before he'd finished his question, he was beginning to understand that this had something to do with my presence.

"Ichijou-san, will you please take Lily into the hallway a moment?" the headmaster asked calmly. I wasn't certain if he was forcing himself to be calm or if this situation had happened before.

"Yes," Ichijou replied, bowing slightly. "Of course."

Ichijou took my arm, and I let him guide me out of the room. He closed the door softly behind him, as I sat down on the floor and leaned my head against the cool stone of the wall. After a moment Ichijou sat down next to me. I became lost in my own thoughts once more. Although I had just seen Kaname's red eyes, I still wasn't completely certain whether or not he was a vampire. His eyes had always been close to the color red, so maybe it was the combination of pre-existing fear and lack of sleep. But I couldn't deny that I'd found his eyes redder than anything I had ever seen before. Only creatures outside of the human realm could manipulate their eye color, and the girl's own words had provided me with the creature that Kaname might be. As in many situations, the answer to my questions was simple – albeit frightening. Kaname was indeed a vampire.

But if Kaname was a vampire, could all the Night Class students be vampires? The student I'd overheard had been a Night Class student. If she were not a vampire herself, how could she have known?

I stole a hasty look at Ichijou. I hadn't wanted him to notice, but he noticed me looking at him almost immediately and waved childishly – as if he wasn't sitting right beside me. If he was a vampire, he did a good job hiding it. Normally I could feel tension from animals or people who threatened me, and this boy was less threatening than Kidd.

"Hey, Lily-chan. Are you all right?" Ichijou asked after a moment.

I nodded slowly, then answered, "I'm just tired. I think."

Ichijou nodded, still smiling placidly at me. "I would offer to take you back to your dorm, but I believe the headmaster wants to speak with you."

As soon as he the words were out of his mouth, the headmaster opened the door and gestured for me to rise and enter. "Lily-chan, there is a conversation that I think we should have now."

Slowly I stood and followed him into his office. I avoided looking at Kaname; although, I could feel him watching me.

I couldn't decide whether I was no longer afraid of Kaname, as well as the Night Class, being vampires, or if I just did not want to appear weak in front of people who had already seen me in a weakened state. More than my fear of being attacked by vampires, I feared appearing weak in front of them.

"Should I return to the lecture hall, Headmaster?" I heard Ichijou ask from the doorway.

"No, this conversation will involve you at some point," the headmaster replied.

I heard Ichijou walk in, and I was a bit surprised when he decided to stand next to me rather than Kaname. Somehow, even with the prospect that Ichijou was a vampire, this decision reassured me somewhat.

Until the headmaster addressed me, my gaze had been upon the floor. When I looked up at Headmaster Cross, I kept my face carefully blank.

"I believe I know why you've come to my office at this late hour," the headmaster began, choosing his words rather carefully. "I cannot deny that I am a bit impressed that you figured out this school's secret so soon."

"Will you be impressed if every student discovered its secret?" Kaname asked the headmaster sarcastically.

The headmaster laughed nervously, and held up his hands as he answered, "Now, Kaname, this girl isn't just any student. She happens to be my newest child…"

I began to zone out a little as the headmaster and Kaname argued back and forth about why it was not and why it was (respectively) a fatal flaw that students could potentially discover that Cross Academy was playing host to a Night Class consisting entirely of vampires.

Am I simply part of Kaien Cross' collection? He keeps referring to me simply as his 'newest child,' as if he is always looking for potential new children, I found myself wondering as they argued. And Kaname… He just keeps reminding the headmaster that he is the one who found me, as well as the one who thought to tell the headmaster about me and my mysterious circumstances…

"In fact, Headmaster, I am the one who helped pull the strings that permitted you to adopt her at all! The authorities had already contacted her brother in Germany and asked him if he could possibly take her, but I convinced them to permit you to adopt her instead!" Kaname vehemently argued with the headmaster. "If anyone should decide what is to be done with her, it ought to be me!"

"Kaname, we both know that Zero and Yuuki are sorely overworked… Another member on the disciplinary committee is necessary, and who could be more trustworthy and ready for the task than my own child?" Headmaster Cross replied hastily.

"Disciplinary committee?" I whispered, mostly to myself. When the headmaster looked my way suddenly, as if only now remembering my presence, I nearly jumped.

"I'm sorry, Lily-chan," the headmaster apologized. "I really thought Kaname and I had reached an agreement, but apparently he's still obstinately refusing to permit you to join the disciplinary committee."

Kaname interrupted, "Headmaster, the one who is being obstinate is you! I was under the impression that we had agreed that her memory should be modified for the time being! She has attended this school for only one day! It is much too soon for her to be expected to have this responsibility!"

"Perhaps this once Lily-chan ought to be the one who decides what action should be taken," Ichijou spoke up.

Suddenly the room went silent, and both Kaname and the headmaster looked to him for his opinion.

Ichijou continued, "She no longer appears frightened, and her first thought upon discovering our secret was not to tell another student what she'd discovered. Her first priority was to see the headmaster. Lily-chan seems very rational, and I believe she would be a valuable asset to the disciplinary committee. However, Lily-chan would know her capabilities much better than we ever could, and deserves to have a voice."

While I appreciated Ichijou's attempt to have me included in the decision-making process, I blanched at the pressure involved with making the final decision. When I had been asked about accepting the headmaster's adoption, everyone seemed to be in agreement over what was best for me, and I had simply agreed with their decision. However, now I would be forced to actually take a side, and inevitably make one person very unhappy – even outraged.

Headmaster Cross seemed to like Ichijou's suggestion, and he smiled as he agreed, "That seems like an excellent idea. Lily-chan, of course you'll decide to be on the disciplinary committee – just like Yuuki and Zero decided to join."

A quick glance at Kaname revealed that he was much against Ichijou's suggestion, or at least against the pressure the headmaster was placing upon me.

A part of me was very afraid that if I accepted the job as prefect, Kaname would become outraged and become aggressive. However, I did not find the prospect of having my memories modified pleasant.

After a few moments of attempting to make a rational decision while everyone waited anxiously for my answer, I finally replied, "Would it be possible to have a few days to consider? I don't feel ready to take on a job as a prefect while I still haven't settled into school, but I also believe I would only rediscover the Night Class' secret if my memories were modified. The dark aura is too much to ignore. It's one I've only ever encountered with…"

I trailed off. The next words I would have spoken were "aggressive animals," but somehow speaking of members of the Night Class, even if they were vampires, in such a way seemed a bit rude and tactless.

The headmaster looked a bit put-out, but Kaname seemed to have heaved a sigh of relief. Kaname nodded, "Friday night around eight. We'll meet again in this office."

The headmaster nodded, then added, "And, Lily-chan, remember that you must not tell anyone what you discovered tonight."

"Of course not. Thank you," I replied, releasing a sigh of relief.

"I'll take Lily-chan back to her dorm, Headmaster," Ichijou volunteered. Without waiting for a reply, Ichijou took my arm and led me out of the office.

For a while we walked in silence along a dark path I slowly began to recognize, then Ichijou spoke up. "I'm sorry about your family, Lily-chan."

I was so startled by his statement that I stopped abruptly. My brow furrowed in extreme confusion, and I could not find words to question what he could possibly be speaking of.

"Kaname told me that day we came to see you in the hospital," Ichijou continued. "About how they were killed in a car accident while you were vacationing in Kyoto. He told me that you were still not able to remember the circumstance in which he'd found you, but…"

Ichijou's voice trailed off. He clearly didn't quite understand how to put his thoughts into words, and seemed to be having second thoughts on reminding me of my parents' deaths when I already had so much to focus on.

I should have acknowledged Ichijou's compassion, but I was so lost in my own thoughts that I didn't even think about reassuring him that he was not being selfish about bringing up the topic of my parents' deaths. As he attempted to place his thoughts into words, I was busy attempting to sort out my memories of Kaname.

It was an impossibility that I had not been in Illinois when I had first seen Kaname. I could clearly remember running to the graveyard; I remembered the graveyard just as clearly as I remembered being beaten by my father that day.

Even as the thought of my father beating me raced through my mind, a cold shiver went down my spine.

Broken glass… I remember… I can feel the glass tearing into me still… As if it were still happening… But why… I can't remember what I'd done to make him so angry…

My expression must have changed from shock to sorrow because Ichijou suddenly became apologetic. "I'm sorry, Lily-chan, I shouldn't have brought it up," he told me. "It was too soon…"

I nodded, still at a loss for words.

Ichijou seemed to want to say something else, but he seemed to think that he'd already done enough damage for one night. "Your dorm isn't far from here," he stated as if he had never been focused on anything other than escorting me back to the safety of my dorm.

I followed Ichijou, and after only a few more minutes saw the familiar dorm looming in front of us. At the sight of the building, I suddenly remembered how tired I was, and I momentarily considered sleeping in the downstairs lobby in lieu of climbing to my bedroom on the top floor.

"Here you are, Lily-chan," Ichijou told me, even though he didn't have to.

"Thank you, Ichijou-senpai," I replied, still deciding whether or not I would be bothering with going all the way back to my bedroom.

I entered the dorm, and shut the door quietly behind me before heading to the staircase, and finally, my room.

…

By a great stroke of luck, I managed to avoid supplementary classes the next day. Although I had gotten only two hours worth of sleep, I had managed to stay awake, as well as pay attention to each of my classes. During lunch, Yori had helped me organize my notebooks, as well as shown me key passages from the textbooks and important notes on units that had been covered while I had been in the hospital.

The only item on my agenda that I did not accomplish was considering the job as prefect. Yuuki didn't attempt to persuade me to join, which led me to determine that the headmaster had not informed her of what I had discovered the night before.

I was much relieved that Yuuki did not know that I knew what the Night Class consisted of, and I was even more relieved that Yuuki did not know that I had been asked to join the disciplinary committee because I knew that Yuuki would have become as persistent as the headmaster at getting me to join. Yet, as I watched from beneath the shade of the tree I'd sat under the previous day, I could see why the headmaster had been so certain I should join the disciplinary committee.

Zero did not appear to be much help to Yuuki. He arrived late, and only appeared as the gates were opening. By this point the fangirls had already caused Yuuki trouble, and no matter what tactic she tried, the fangirls simply would not obey her.

Of course, Zero redeemed himself as soon as he arrived. His very presence sent the fangirls into orderly rows, which seemed to aggravate Yuuki even more. Although I could not hear Yuuki's words, I could see her punching Zero in the arm, as well as Zero calmly pushing her back so that she could not reach him.

Great sighs, cheers, and screams of delight let me know that the Night Class had emerged from behind the gates. I quickly turned to my sketchbook, and began sketching a flower not too far from where I sat.

As I glanced up at the flower, I became distracted by two Day Class girls approaching Kaname. One of them bowed and offered him a rose. "Kuran-senpai," the girl stammered nervously. "Um… Please, accept this!" Her voice rose into a desperately strong tone despite her obvious distress upon approaching Kaname with her offering.

Kaname smiled politely at her as he accepted the rose. "Thank you," he murmured softly.

As the two girls walked away giggling to each other, Kaname looked directly at me. For a moment our eyes met, and a severe expression replaced the pleasant look Kaname had displayed for his nervous fan. In the next instant, the rose in his hand had withered and died.

I hastily looked away from Kaname, and instead became intent upon a random tree limb that was not remotely interesting, yet did not stop staring at it until I was positive that the Night Class had disappeared into the school.

Not wishing to break curfew a second night, I gathered my belongings and followed the remaining fangirls back to the dorm. Somehow the image of the withered rose remained imprinted in my memory.

All throughout the night, sleep evaded me. Each time I began to drift off, Kaname's eyes appeared, just behind the withered rose. I could not shake the feeling that he had been giving me a clear warning about the danger the vampires of the Night Class would pose to me if I became a prefect.

They are of the darkness… Only death and despair follow them… It isn't safe to be around them…

However, as soon as these thoughts went through my mind, I remembered the warmth that seemed to surround Ichijou. Although he was a vampire, he'd genuinely cared about the sorrow I must be feeling about my parents' deaths. He had not appeared a bit threatening to me, and I felt more comfortable with him than I had with any other person.

Then I remembered the darkness that had surrounded the two Night Class girls I had overheard. It was obvious to me that the vast majority of vampires were not warm and friendly like Ichijou, but I somehow felt that if I turned down the job as prefect, I would be unfairly deciding that all the vampires in the Night Class were dark, dangerous, and uncaring – an assumption that made me feel as if I were betraying Ichijou.

I rolled over to face the open window, and stared out at the darkened treetops. If I had been truly afraid of the vampires roaming the school grounds at night, I would have closed my window. The fact that I had felt secure enough to leave the window open as I slept seemed to be an answer to my dilemma.

I would be a prefect. I would join the disciplinary committee. I would prove to Kuran Kaname that I was not afraid of him.

As I finally fell asleep, a new face – a face more fearsome than even Kaname's – flashed through my mind. And in front of this new impassive face was not a rose, but a staff with an ornate sickle shaped blade at the top.

"Go back to sleep, little one," the man spoke. I had not expected his tone to be so soft. Reassured, I closed my eyes, and dreamt of nothing.

…

I was certain of my decision until I was standing before the headmaster's office on Friday night. Before knocking on the door, I leaned against the wall and reconsidered my decision. I needed to be certain my decision had not been mere defiance toward Kaname's intimidation.

Yuuki needs my help because Zero either does not show up to assist her, or he arrives after the trouble has begun… I am not afraid of the vampires, and I could be of assistance. Not all vampires are cruel; if I decide to turn the job down based on fear, I would be showing injustice to Ichijou.

When I finally knocked on the headmaster's door, I was certain I had arrived at the correct decision.

The headmaster, Kaname, and Ichijou were already in the room when I entered. I avoided looking any of them in the eye as I approached the headmaster's desk.

"Have you reached a decision, Lily-chan?" the headmaster asked. Although he looked as if he was eager for me to agree to be on the disciplinary committee, he managed to keep his expression more stoic than the previous night.

I nodded, as I answered, "I have decided that I will join the disciplinary committee, Headmaster."

The headmaster smiled enthusiastically. I didn't want to look at Kaname; I could feel him seething from where I stood, but he remained silent.

"You'll need a weapon to defend yourself with," the headmaster continued, turning from me. I didn't have time to protest before he'd handed me what appeared to be a slender cylinder not much larger than a can of pop. I stared at it for a moment, trying to determine what it was.

"It's a legendary weapon. Unnamed. Legend says when it meets its true owner, it will reveal its true shape," the headmaster explained.

"You're going to give her that?" Kaname demanded. "Of all anti-vampire weapons?"

"Kaname, you know as well as I do that this weapon only extends into a rod similar to Yuuki's for the average human… It is a good basic weapon for defending oneself against a vampire," the headmaster replied, shaking his head. "Go on, Lily-chan, just press that button…"

But before he could explain how to use the weapon, the same soft voice from my dream instructed me, "Give it a quick flick to your left, and say 'Reveal.'"

For some reason I trusted the voice of the man in my dream. He sounded so familiar, as if he had protected me previously.

Ignoring the headmaster's hasty correction of my flicking, I said in a surprisingly calm voice, "Reveal."

Golden vine-like strands crept from the end of the small cylinder, and simultaneously crept toward my hand and the top of the rod which had been extended by at least four feet.

"Drop it, Lily-chan!" Ichijou cried suddenly. "It can't be meant for you!"

Although I wished to acknowledge his concern, I knew that he was wrong. As the golden strands ensnared my hand, I found that they did not burn. Instead they seemed to be demonstrating how the rod was to be properly held.

After a sudden flash of golden light, the vines disappeared, and the top of the rod was revealed to have transformed itself into an ornate sickle shaped blade. Propped inside the sickle shaped blade was a winged figure.

"I've seen this staff before…" I had not meant to say it aloud, but I was so perplexed by the familiarity of the staff I now held that I could not help myself. "I can't remember where…"

For a while the room was silent, then the headmaster said, trying to be upbeat, "Well! I think you're set, Lily-chan!"

Kaname glowered at the headmaster, clearly blaming the transformation of the simple rod to a powerful staff on the headmaster's decision to bestow upon me a legendary weapon.

Without even considering what I was doing, I gave the staff a quick flick once more and thought, Conceal. Immediately the staff reduced itself back into the small cylinder shaped rod I had been presented with. I placed it in the messenger bag slung over my shoulder.

"I-I'll take Lily-chan back to her dormitory, Headmaster," Ichijou spoke. He was still staring at me in shock.

"Yes, thank you," the headmaster acknowledged a bit nervously; he didn't seem to know whether or not it would be safe to be alone with Kaname.

I followed Ichijou out of the office, and we set off down the now familiar path that led to the dormitory.

Neither of us spoke, and even if Ichijou had brought up a topic of discussion, I would not have been able to focus on it. I was too deep into my own thoughts. Why had the rod transformed into a staff when I had flicked it? Why had it obeyed my command for it to reveal itself? And why was I hearing a voice inside my head?

For the second time tonight words I had only meant to think slipped through my lips, "I must be crazy."

"You're not crazy," Ichijou assured me. "Even vampires can discover that they've had abilities they were unaware of."

I nodded even though I was not completely convinced. At the entrance to my dorm, I thanked Ichijou, then entered and quickly climbed the stairs to my bedroom. At least I had the weekend to sort things out. Come Monday, I would be starting my new job for the disciplinary committee.

Instead of going straight to bed, I sat at my desk and spread out my recent sketches before finally deciding to begin a new one. Maybe if I drew what I remembered of the face in my dream, I would be able to determine where I had seen it before.

For four hours I attempted to sketch the face I had seen, but I couldn't quite remember the details clearly enough. After wasting numerous sheets of paper, I propped my head onto my hands and stared down at the unfinished sketch of the man in my dream.

Suddenly his face flashed before me again, and I felt myself fall into a dreamless sleep.

I finally figured out how to correct all the errors in this chapter! Unfortunately, I decided to surround Lily with more intrigue, so I also altered the plot somewhat. Now I really have to work on revising all these chapters. :/

Some of the following chapters (all but a few, actually) will be completely re-written and uploaded soon. If there are any readers out there, please, bear with me. I am trying to improve the quality of this story.

Cheers,
Mango