"Put three characters in my ask box and I will write a fan fiction with each in it" - awesometashis gave me Zoro, Sanji, and Ace.

722 words
Rated T/M

This was really pissing Zoro off… though he wasn't really sure why. Sanji was free to flirt with whoever he wanted, really. A few tumbles in the hold hardly counted as a lasting relationship. Besides, the stupid love-cook flirted with the girls constantly; Zoro was more than used to that. So what exactly about this situation was pissing Zoro off?

"Did you need anything else, Ace?"

Zoro tensed as the words grated against his skin. Ace. That fire wielding bastard had stopped in for a visit. He'd snuck aboard in the dead of night and surprised them all in the morning. He'd gotten Zoro in quite a bit of trouble with both the cook and the sea witch for sleeping on his watch. Not that it mattered, Ace was their friend so it wasn't like they were under attack.

"No, thank you, Sanji," Ace replied to the cook with a winning smile.

Sanji returned the smile with one of his own and moved on to crow over the girls. Ace's eyes trailed after him, his smile turning lecherous as he watched the cook bend over the table to snatch one of Robin's scones from Luffy's grasp. Zoro glowered into his glass of juice, trying hard not to notice these things, and trying even harder not to care.

"Hey, Zoro," Ace called quietly, leaning towards the swordsman, a conspiratorial smile on his face. "What do you think Sanji looks like naked?"

Ace was very fortunate that Zoro had already swallowed his sip of juice, otherwise he might have spit it out all over the flame man. "What?!"

"Come on," Ace smirked. "You can't tell me you've never pictured it. With those tight clothes he wears? You've got to be curious."

Zoro had been curious at one point. He'd find himself slipping into fantasies about what that shit-cook might look like under all those fussy clothes.

"He looks too skinny," Ace commented and Zoro was about half a second from replying that the cook was not too skinny, before he reminded himself that he was not going to have this conversation.

Ace continued on anyway. "But I bet that's not the case. He's pretty strong, I bet he has a lot of muscle, all packed together on that lean frame."

Zoro really did not need to be visualizing the cook's muscles, rolling and flexing under his smooth, pale skin.

"And those legs," Ace sighed wistfully. "They're so long, they just go on forever. His legs are strong, right? What I wouldn't give to have those wrapped around me for the night."

Ace had no idea. Sanji's legs were powerful lean muscles and tendons wrapped around bone. Being between them, having them wrapped around you, was both terrifying and elating. The cook's true strength lay in those legs, and Zoro knew what it was like to be at their mercy… in more ways than one.

"Along with that shiny blond hair and those pretty blue eyes, your cook is really something to look at," Ace finished with a sip of his coffee.

The cook's hair was special. The shiny golden strands that felt like silk when Zoro ran his hands through it were really something. And those 'pretty blue eyes' were particularly amazing to Zoro. How they could go from a blue as cold as ice to something warmer like a summer's sky and back to something deep, almost grey, and thoughtful was beyond Zoro. It was like the ocean itself existed in Sanji's eyes and brought all of its wild unpredictability with it.

"Zoro?" Sanji called, looking quizzically at the swordsman. "Is something wrong?"

Zoro hadn't realized he'd been staring. Sanji wasn't the only one to notice, it seemed several of his crew members had noticed his absent minded staring at the love-cook. Zoro felt his face heat and lowered his head, studding his breakfast.

"Nothing's wrong, shit-cook," He replied to his eggs.

Sanji frowned but shrugged, returning to his cooing. From his left he could hear the fire user snickering. Zoro glared at him, and allowed one hand to rest threateningly on the hilt of one of his swords. Ace seemed to notice the action and raised one skeptical eyebrow at the swordsman.

"You're right about one thing, Ace," Zoro growled, low enough to keep any eavesdroppers from hearing. "He is my Cook."