CHAPTER FIVE: HOLIDAY SPECIAL: Merry Christmas!
Sorry for the huge, long wait for this chapter. I know I'm two days late for a Christmas special, but who cares?!
Annabeth: Not me. I'm just glad it's up at all, you lazy stick-in-the-mud.
…weeellll, geee, thaaannnks, Annabeth.
Annabeth: Hey, no prob, Kit. It's what friends are for!
…
"MERRY CHRISTMAAAASSSSSS!" Chikorita shrieked, leaping all across the room. She had been sleeping in the closet. Why she was sleeping in the closet, we will never know.
"IT WAS BECAUSE I FELT LIKE IT, GENIUS!" Chikorita responded, still shrieking.
…okay then. Never mind.
Everyone else had been sleeping in the corner on the huge pile of giant fluffy feather pillows, like normal people. Er, Pokémon.
Wait, wait… normal?! OH NO! NORMALCY! YOU GUYS HAVE CAUGHT A CASE OF NORMALCY!
"What?! WHAT?!" Glaceon shrieked as she leaped to her feet. "NOOOO!"
"It's okay! We can fix it. It's Christmas, remember? There is no way we will stay normal on Christmas, so don't worry." Umbreon replied.
Shuppet grinned maniacally.
Oh my Zelda.
Oshawott snorted. "'Oh my Zelda'? Seriously, Kit?!"
Meloetta shrugged. "I think it's a perfectly good game series."
"You know what, I changed my mind! I LOVE ZELDA! OH MY ZELDA, ZELDA IS AWESOME! HEAR THAT, MELOETTA?!" Oshawott shouted.
"HEEEEYYYY, I LOVE ZELDA TOO, MELOETTA!" Piplup shouted as well.
Piplup and Oshawott glared at each other. And I'm talking really, really HARD glares.
"You aren't talking, Kit," Ambipom reminded me. "You're typing."
Oh, be quiet.
"Hey, did everyone forget that IT'S CHRISTMAS?!" Chikorita shrieked.
"CHRISTMAAAASSSS!" The other Pokémon shrieked as well, and a whole truckload of gifts dropped into the room from that hole in the ceiling.
"OW! WHY DID A TRUCK JUST FALL ON ME?!"
Uh, minus the truck. Sorry, Umbreon.
"Oooh! POLKA-DOTS!" Glaceon gasped as she unwrapped a jumbo-sized package of rainbow colored polka-dots.
"Cookies!" Chikorita squealed when she unwrapped her gift: a huge tin of cookies in an assortment of flavors.
"A new mallet!" Cyndaquil cried upon unwrapping her present. "Now I don't have to use Misty's anymore!"
Meanwhile, in Cerulean City…
Misty was keeping her mallet in her backpack, anyway, so Cyndaquil couldn't have used it. She had received a threat from LovingTogetic that had something to do with PokéShipping and a few embarrassing moments which would be revealed if Misty didn't keep the mallet in the bag…
Back in the Room…
Cyndaquil thrust her own mallet into Nowhere to use later, where it promptly clonked LovingTogetic on the head.
"Hey! NOT ANOTHER ONE! What sort of threat will I have to make this time?!" LovingTogetic growled. Why don't we call her Togie for short?
"Yeah! TOGIE!" Ambipom cheered, wearing his new pair of sunglasses.
"Is this… a gun from the Wii game Top Shot Arcade?" Shuppet asked, eyes widening as he unwrapped his gift. How he managed it without hands, we will never know.
"Easy. I used Psychic, Kit." Shuppet rolled his eyes.
…okay, then. Never mind. Am I getting déjà vu?
"Yeah," Dragonite replied. "Take a look at the beginning of the chapter."
"YEAH!" Charizard roared into his voice distorter, which he had just gotten for Christmas.
Oshawott had gotten a DS and Piplup had gotten a collection of every Pokémon game ever created. The two high-fived.
"Yeah!" They shouted together.
"Wait a minute, wouldn't that be a high-paw?" Piplup frowned. He was confuzzled.
Um, maybe? And aren't you two bitter enemies or somethi—
"WAIT A SECOND KIT HOLD ON DID YOU JUST— ! CONFUZZLED IS NOT A WORD!" Umbreon howled. He was a little late on that… and Cyndaquil is brandishing that mallet of hers in a very evil way…
"Yeah!" Shuppet shouted, using Psychic to hold his new Wii gun. "Who's first?" He grinned maniacally. Again. I think it's a hobby of his.
"Shuppet, careful! This fic is supposed to be K+ rating remember?!" Meloetta scolded.
"I DON'T CARE! DIE!" Shuppet screeched.
Glaceon rolled her eyes. She was covered in polka-dots. "Shuppet, don't you get the true meaning of Christmas at all?! Which is, um, definitely NOT killing everyone in sight!"
"Huh?" Shuppet stared at her, confuzzled. SHUT UP, UMBREON.
"But I didn't - "
But you were going to! Anyway, where were we? Oh, right, Shuppet doesn't know the true meaning of Christmas and everything -
"SHUPPET DOESN'T KNOW THE TRUE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS?!" Ambipom gasped.
The Room went dead silent.
"Oh no." Cyndaquil dropped her mallet.
"Oh cookies." Chikorita said with a mouthful of chocolate crumbs.
"Oh Arceus." Glaceon muttered.
GLACEON! LANGUAGE!
"Be quiet, Kit! We are dealing with a case of Christmaslessness here!" Umbreon spat.
Um, if I be quiet, the story will come to a screeching halt, guys.
"...oh. Right." Umbreon muttered.
"Okay! Everyone! Get a couch, some blankets and pillows, a few candy canes, a tray of cookies, a Christmas tree, a fireplace, a Santa hat, a pile of Christmas movies and books, and a microphone!" Meloetta ordered.
Cyndaquil began rummaging through Nowhere and the other Pokémon crammed into the closet while Shuppet stood there, dumbfounded. And confuzzled. Umbreon, don't say a word.
"I'm not standing, I'm levitating. Umbreon, you are free to speak," Shuppet corrected. WAIT HEY!
"CONFUZZLED IS NOT A WORD!" Umbreon yelped.
...thanks, Umbreon. I REALLY needed to hear that.
"Was that sarcasm?" Umbreon asked suspiciously.
No! Now be quiet, because we've got a Christmas special to continue with!
Meanwhile, the other Pokémon were all gathered on the couch and the floor in front of the fireplace, watching The Polar Express and munching Christmas cookies.
"Togetherness," Dragonite sighed happily. "This is what Christmas is all about."
"Yes," Charizard sighed in reply, taking Dragonite's hand. "Indeed. Love and friendship."
"...those two found the eggnog, didn't they?" Ambipom sighed. Butterfree nodded solemnly.
"...And drank all that's left?" Glaceon added. Umbreon nodded solemnly.
"...well, at least we can be glad it wasn't Shuppet!" Cyndaquil said hopefully, and the other Pokémon nodded.
"WHEEEE!" Shuppet suddenly zipped into the room, dressed in Santa getup and riding a mini sleigh (they make those?!) and throwing Christmas cookies to everyone. "I HAVE FOUND THE TRUE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS! BE HAPPY AND LOVE EACH OTHER AND BE GENEROUS AND GRATEFUL!"
"...I take that back," Cyndaquil sighed. "Shuppet found some, too."
...
Hooray! The true meaning of Christmas!
Annabeth: Merry Christmas!
Cutemon: Hug your Pikachu, guys!
Gary: um... a Pikachu?
Cutemon: Yep!
Gary: um... wouldn't the readers end up paralyzed and shocked senseless?
Cutemon: *grinning* Does it matter?
Link: Merry Christmas! MERRY CHRISTMAS! HUG A PIKACHU AND MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Link, what's with the Santa hat?
Annabeth: ...And why is it... green...?
WE WILL NEVER KNOW!
Anyway, Merry (late) Christmas, hug a Pikachu like Cutemon said (and try not to die from being electrocuted in the process) and I will hopefully update soon! See ya!