Ch. 8

Separation Anxiety

A blinding white light enveloped Sakura as she huddled closer to its warmth. She opened her eyes to see a blank nothingness in front of her, and she reached out to touch it

The light spoke.

"Sakura…."

She inhaled sharply, recognizing the voice.

"N-Naruto-kun…"

"Sakura-chan, don't be so sad You know I don't like it when you get sad, right?"Sakura then felt the sobs pouring out of her like rain. The goofy laugh that would cheer her up so many times resounded throughout the completely white world. But then it all turned black, and Sakura could see below her, as if she was looking through glass.

She looked down to see a figure laying, motionless, on the ground. His long ebony hair was matted with blood, and it covered his face, preventing Sakura from making out his features. His limbs were splayed about at odd angles, and she knew that almost all if them were broken beyond repair. Then another figure approached the seemingly dead one.

Then the world flashed once again, and she found herself looking at the same scene as if nothing had happened. But this time she was looking at it as if she was standing right next to it.

It continued on.

The woman from the other world stood above the motionless figure, not moving at all. Most of her face was covered by her hair as well, but the parts that were visible were covered with blood. The woman's hair was drenched with blood and matted with dirt, making it look an ugly shade of orange-brown.

She kneeled down over the boy, brushing his hair out of his face.

Sakura's breath caught.

The body was Sasuke's. His face was covered in blood as well, and he weakly turned his head to look at the kneeling woman above him.

Sakura tried to move to him, to help him, but found herself suddenly chained to a rock. She tried to use all her strength to free herself, to reach the man she loved, but she could do nothing. The bonds were too strong.

So she continued to remain still, watching as the young woman ran a shaking hand down the side of Sasuke's face, wiping a smear of blood from his cheek. It began to rain, and Sakura gasped when she did not get wet. The rain merely fell everywhere else around her, but it left her untouched.

But she drew a shuddering breath when she saw the woman snatch her hand away from Sasuke's face, as if she had been scalded. She stared down at her hand, and Sakura could barely make out the tears falling from under the woman's soaked hair.

The hair…

Dirt and blood were beginning to drip out of the young woman's hair. Sakura slumped down against the rock when she saw patches of a soft pink hue bursting through the drab mix of dirt and blood. She knew it was herself, but she seemed…older. This Sakura moved with much more grace, and her hair was now down to her waist. She was much taller, her legs longer.

Sasuke seemed, from what the younger Sakura could see, much older than she remembered as well. In a nutshell, he looked just like Itachi, but with a different, more bluish tint to his black hair.

She continued to watch the scene.

The woman slowly reached down to the side of her right leg, pulling a kunai out of the weapon pouch strapped there. She raised the small knife slowly with both hands above the barely-alive Sasuke's chest, and Sakura screamed, telling her older self not to do it, no matter what. But she found that they could not hear her, either. But Sakura could her them.

"Sasuke-kun…I…"

The boy turned his head once again towards the other Sakura.

"Sakura…please, let me see your face once more…"The older Sakura removed one hand from the raised kunai to pull the stray hair from out of her face. When she did, the dying Sasuke brought a broken hand up to her face, and he smiled slightly when her warm skin touched his mangled hand.

"Sakura…I love you…"

The older Sakura smiled as well and said, "I love you too…I always have…"

The young Sakura was now sobbing again. She struggled harder to free herself, and, this time, she felt the chains tying her steadily loosening.

But she was too late. The older Sakura brought her hand away from her face, where it had been resting on Sasuke's, and she was clutching the kunai once again. And with one, final scream of agony, the older woman brought her weapon down, driving it completely into the man's chest. Younger Sakura finally pulled free. She screamed, trudging over to the dead Sasuke.

When she reached his body, the older Sakura looked up. The younger one gasped as the elder looked straight at her, emerald clashing with emerald. Then, the elder spoke. But when she did, her voice was not what it was only a few seconds before.

"Sakura…you did this. You did this…he's dead because of you…"

The younger Sakura shook as she answered.

"No, no, I couldn't have. You misunderstand, this had to by your doing, after all you're the one covered in blood…"But the elder shook her head, and pointed slowly towards the younger. The smaller girl looked down at herself, and started to breathe quicker as she saw that the blood from the girl opposite her had disappeared completely and she was now covered with it. She vomited as the metallic scent filled her nose and mouth.

"But…but, I saw you…you stabbed him, it was you…it was…"But the older Sakura laughed cruelly, and shook her head. She pulled Sasuke's shirt down, revealing a scar that said "pure". Sakura then felt an intense burning on her chest as well, and immediately ripped her shirt down, only to reveal a marking of the same sort saying "darkness".

The elder spoke.

"Sakura, you killed him. It was your fault. You are permanently marked as a killer. Now die…"

And Sakura screamed as her older self tossed the kunai at her head, and she toppled over, blacking out.

"Sakura…"

Sakura groaned.

"Sakura, please…"

She slowly opened her eyes, squinting at the blinding light above her. When everything came into focus, she saw Deidara hovering over her yet again, looking extremely worried. Blood crusted an entire side of his face, and he had some nasty cuts all over his cheek.

And, remembering all too well what had happened, Sakura snapped up and looked fervently around for enemies.

But Deidara tried to push her back down gently, telling her that everything was alright, that there was nothing to worry about. Sasuke was dead. She merely brushed his hand off her shoulder, not wanting to lay back down, afraid she would go back to sleep.

"Sasuke-kun…"

Sakura did not cry, but only stared at the wall opposite her, her dream flooding back to her. Well, looks like the future me was right. It was my fault…

She then remembered another thing.

"Deidara-kun, I thought you were dead! Are you alright? Do you need help, I can heal those cuts on your face if you want me to—"

But he held up a hand, telling her that he was okay. She smiled, but it vanished as the one last, lonely memory came back to her. She glanced up at Deidara with hurt in her eyes, and he stared back with understanding. He cleared his throat and looked away, smiling in a sad sort of way.

"Ah…so you still remember that too, yeah…?"

She nodded her head.

"Deidara-kun, why did you try to…to…?"

She couldn't finish her sentence. But she didn't need to.

"Sakura-san…I don't really know. I just…I love you. I want the best for you, and when you didn't seem to understand that, I wanted to force it on you, yeah."

She nodded again, understanding. She was not angry with Deidara, nor was she in any way upset with him. She was just disappointed that he had let his feelings get so out of control.

"It's alright, Deidara-kun. I understand; I was in a similar position a few years ago. I felt like the man I loved didn't think my feelings mattered, so I yelled at him. I tried to force them on him, but he still left. And now he decides to come back, with a demon snake locked up inside of him. It ended up in his death anyway."

Deidara stared down at the floor. Then a thought struck him.

"Sakura-san, you know that I would never hurt you ever again right? I don't know what happened then, yeah…"

She nodded for the third time.

But then she noticed three others enter the room, each carrying a medical supply or parcel of food in each hand.

She smiled when Sasori placed a cool towel around her shoulders, and gratefully accepted the bowl of noodles that Hidan gave her. Kisame held what looked like antibiotics, and Sakura stared inquisitively at them. But nobody noticed. They were all staring at Kisame.

Kisame blushed slightly and handed the antibiotic to Sasori.

"Sasori, why don't you do it…I'm sure she rather it be you…"

Sasori nodded and waved his hand to dismiss them from the room. Sakura asked him what was going on, but he didn't answer right away.

When the door closed behind the three exiting shinobi, Sasori spoke.

"Sakura-san, would you please remove your bandages for me?"

Sakura only stared, but she trusted Sasori, so she slowly unwrapped the bandages that covered her entire torso. She was going to unwrap them all the way, but Sasori stopped her right above her nipple, which she was grateful for.

"That's quite enough. Thank you."

She looked down at her chest, expecting to see a jagged cut from Sasuke's nails or whatnot, but what she saw surprised her entirely.

Looking down, she saw a bloody character carved over her heart. It was upside-down to her, meaning that Sasori could read it fine. She asked him what it said.

"Don't you remember, Sakura-san? You carved this into your chest after you killed Sasuke and Orochimaru. You also carved one similar into Sasuke; his says pure, and your says…darkness."

Sakura gasped. She didn't know that she had done this. But Sasori dismissed it with mild curiosity, and spread the antibiotic over the bloody writing.

She bit her lip. The ointment stung, but she knew it helped.

"Thank you, Sasori-san."

He had finished and was now screwing the lid back onto the tub. He smiled at her, telling her that it was his pleasure.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, neither knowing what to say. But a thought that had been nagging on the back of Sakura's mind finally crept into her mouth, and she voiced it to the man next to her.

"Sasori-san, do you by chance know when Itachi will be back?"

Sasori glanced up at her.

"Well, according to Hidan, he left this morning. With Itachi's skill and demeanor, he will probably get Kazuku back today. But if he does not manage to get Kazuku alone, then he will retreat and return to Konoha with Kisame and Hidan."

Sakura nodded. But she looked back up at Sasori when he spoke again.

"But then again, He will probably send Deidara, Hidan and I to retrieve Kazuku if he does not succeed alone. I'm sure he would prefer to stay here with you and send us rather than go himself. Either way, he should be back in two days tops."

She nodded again.

"Sakura-san, you must rest. Your encounter with Sasuke must have drained you very much, both physically and emotionally."

She lay down as an acknowledgement of his words. Sakura turned her back towards him so that she faced the wall. The mention of Sasuke's name caused her to retreat into a mental shell yet again.

She felt Sasori run his hand down her bare arm lovingly, and she still said nothing.

He got up and walked towards the door, but she stopped him right as he was about to go out.

"Sasori-kun…thank you."

She heard him exit, and smiled into her pillow as she quickly drifted off to sleep.

Hidan, Kisame, Deidara and Sasori were all huddled together around the small table in the middle of the Akatsuki kitchen. They were discussing how to approach Sakura and question her about Sasuke without upsetting her again. Kisame proposed that they just pay her; Hidan said force would be the best way; Deidara suggested that they should just be cautious in what they say and how they say it, being the most reasonable request yet. But Sasori decided that none of these things were the right way to do it, and further thought, leaving all of them hanging.

He leaned back, running a hand down his face in exasperation. They are all such idiots, with the exception of Deidara. Well, sometimes.

"I think…we should let Itachi-san talk to her about it."

Kisame, Hidan and Deidara all stared at Sasori when he voiced his suggestion. Noticing their incredulous gaze, he knew that they would only see reason if it slapped them in the face.

"Well, not to rub anything in…"

He glanced at Deidara.

"But Sakura-san loves Itachi-san. She would never get angry with him or hurt him. And if she did, it would be impossible to touch him, even for her. Especially for her."

Kisame chuckled.

"Sasori, she loved Sasuke too. But look at him now. The bastard ended up having his arms torn out and his body mutilated, despite whatever feelings the kunoichi had for him. Personally, I think she's snapped. Unstable, if you ask me. We're all in danger."

Deidara stood up, angrily pounding his fist on the table.

"Sakura-san is not unstable! She was just defending herself, and went too far. She was angry at him for leaving her and giving his body over to that demon snake. And when she remembered that it wasn't Sasuke anymore anyway, she beat the shit out of him. We all do that too; go overboard, I mean. She's just like the rest of us. So shut it, fishy."

Kisame looked affronted at being called "fishy". He made a small, girlish noise and turned his nose up at the blonde.

"I believe that you are both right. Yes, it's true that she brutally killed Sasuke-san, regardless of her supposed love, and yes, she is dangerous. But not in the way you think."

The three men around Sasori stared. He inwardly rolled his eyes. They don't get it at all…

"I mean that she is dangerous because of her kekkei genkai."

They still stared, but in a different manor. They were gazing back in disbelief, astonished that such a young girl, who couldn't even beat one of them while training, could possess a kekkei genkai.

Sasori, detecting their surprise, explained.

"I'm fairly sure that Sakura-san is not aware that she possesses such a trait. But I am quite sure that she does. After Sakura-san lost control, I was doing research on her clan, wondering what would have made her go mad for a brief time. While researching, I came upon something quite interesting. Select members from the Haruno clan posses the kekkei genkai Waru Jishin, or Split Self. It basically means that Sakura-san has a dual personality, the one residing in her mind being the much stronger and much more violent one of the two."

The other three shinobi listened intently. They inched in closer, not wanting to miss anything. Sasori sighed, then continued.

"Normally, the Waru Jishinonly emerges in times of extreme pressure or exertion, normally during the usual shinobi's genin years. But for Sakura-san, the revelation was delayed, and Sakura-san has no idea that it actually happened. In short, she thought that it was only a small burst of power that allowed her to defeat Sasuke. She has not even thought of the prospect of Waru Jishin.

So, I have decided to inform Itachi-san of absolutely everything that has occurred, and he is to tell Sakura-san about the Kekkei Genkai she possesses and then question her about her encounter with his brother."

Kisame, Hidan and Deidara nodded. They knew that Sasori's logic was always infallible, so they chose to work with his tactics on the field. This time, they would do the same.

The four shinobi exited the room, each thinking their own thoughts centered on the pink-haired kunoichi down the hall. They returned to their rooms alone, waiting anxiously for Itachi's return.

Sakura woke for the second time that day. Her room was dark, the shutters pulled closed. Nonetheless, she could see well enough, and she stumbled into the bathroom. She flipped the light on and squinted for a few seconds, her eyes adjusting to the bright hanging light. She ran the hot water and splashed her face, welcoming the warm tingling sensation when she dried herself with the towel. She used the restroom, and, gasping, remembering something that she had considered a few days ago. She quickly flushed the toilet and pulled her sweatpants back up, slumping against the wall. She did not cry, but she thought long and hard.

She was late.

She tried to remember…had Itachi used a condom…?

Yes.

Then what…?

Silence.

Oh god no…

Deidara.

She cried now, frantically thinking what Itachi would do with the child. It would be impossible for him not to know; the blonde hair, crystal blue eyes…all inheritable traits. And the kekkei genkai…what would he think if the child did not possess the sharingan or the kekkei genkai that ran through her family? She knew that she did not possess it, but it was completely possible to pass the gene onto her baby…

But condoms only work 97 of the time. What if Itachi and I were in the unlucky 3...?

She did not harbor any contempt towards having Deidara's child; only fear at what Itachi would do. She was aware that he knew that she and Deidara had had sex, but…he may not be able to handle the fact that it wouldn't be his child.

And that brought her to another thought.

Who would raise it…?She knew, of course, that she would be the child's mother…but she lived with Deidara as well as Itachi, and it would be impossible for the stone shinobi to not notice that her child was his. With my luck, it'll probably grow up to look exactly like Deidara…

Itachi, of course, would want a hand in raising it. He would be its father technically, but Deidara was the child's blood father.

But as she thought further, she remembered there were many options. She could have an abortion—no, she couldn't. She could have the child in secret and get Sasori to help her through her pregnancy, then decide what to do with it. And of course, the most appealing option was adoption.

God, she thought. I can't do this on my own…

She shook as she sobbed, and she knew that she had to tell both of the men as soon as she could. But the problem was deciding who to tell first.

I'll wait for Itachi to get back, and tell them together…

So, having decided to wait for her lover, she cried some more, then washed her face again. She exited the bathroom and walked over to turn on the light to her main room.

When she did, she gasped, then smiled.

"Itachi-kun…"

The raven-haired man was standing in front of the open window. She smiled wider, knowing that it was just like him to make a grand entrance. She ran over and hugged him, taking in his musky scent under the smell of blood that coated him. He wrapped his arms around her as well, and buried his face in her hair.

"Sakura…I missed you."

She tilted her head upwards and kissed him gently.

"I missed you too," she said softly.

She took his hand and led him to the bed. He lay down, and she crawled on top of him. Although they were in this suggestive position, she had no intention of taking it any further tonight. She still had to tell him…well, just talk to him.

She wiggled her arms under his heavy shoulders, hugging him close. She laid the side of her face on his chest.

"Where did you go? We all assumed that you went to retrieve Kazuku, but we didn't know for sure."

She felt his steady breathing break as he inhaled deeply.

"Hn."

Sakura was puzzled at his ironically unresponsive response, but she did not push him. She would ask again later. Picking her head up off of his chest, she decided that now was a better time than ever.

"Itachi-kun, could you please come with me to the kitchen?"

He raised his eyebrows at the girl on top of him, thinking that her question was quite peculiar. He would go anywhere, as long as it was with her.

"Of course."

She smiled, rolled off and dragged him off of the bed. She took his hand, pulling him toward the door.

"Sakura, is everything alright? You seem…excited about something."

She just turned and nodded, but he now saw even a little bit of apprehension in her eyes. He cocked his head, not understanding for once.

When the reached the kitchen, she sat him down and told him to wait there. He nodded obediently, not wanting to break her intense focus on whatever she was thinking about.

She reentered after a few minutes, pulling Deidara behind her in the same fashion she had pulled him. Itachi tensed mentally, but did not show it physically, although Deidara did. He stopped, jerking his hand out of Sakura's.

"Sakura-san, what's going on, yeah?"

She pulled him quite forcefully this time, nearly throwing him into a chair. He scowled at the chair, then at Itachi, who returned his gaze indifferently.

Sakura sat at the end of the table, with Itachi at her left and Deidara at her right.

"Itachi-kun, Deidara-kun—"

Both Deidara and Itachi made noises of disapproval at the other being addressed as "-kun". But Sakura scowled at them fiercely, and they immediately regained composure.

"Both of you, I have something very important we need to discuss."

Itachi gazed at her, activating his Sharingan. He looked into her eyes, trying to discern her feelings to determine the matter at hand. But he could not, so he changed his eyes back to their normal obsidian, and stared ahead of him at Deidara.

Deidara suddenly became very serious, wondering if she had heard them talking about the kekkei genkai she possessed. He mentally shook his head, knowing that there was no way that she could know about that. So he sat and braced himself for what was to come.

Sakura was pretty sure that this meeting would not end well at all, but she had to tell them sometime. Better early then never, in this case.

And she had to make sure that Itachi used a condom before she told them exactly whose baby she was pretty sure it was.

"Now I don't want this to be awkward for you two, but I have to ask you both some questions."

The nodded.

"Itachi, try to remember something for me."

He nodded.

"Did you use a condom when we slept together?"She tried not to smile at the reaction that her question merited. Itachi's cheeks flushed a light shade of pink, and his eyes flashed, showing his embarrassment. Deidara turned quite red, and let out a loud laugh before a glance of death from Sakura shut him up.

Itachi, managing to maintain his composure, answered her.

"Yes."

Sakura grimaced.

"Both times?"

His cheeks flushed a darker pink.

"Yes."

She sighed, and she closed her eyes for a minute before turning to Deidara, who immediately straightened up, his eyes wide.

"Deidara, I know for a fact that you did not. This brings me to my next…topic of discussion."

She leaned back, so she could face both of them.

"I'm pregnant."

This time, she didn't feel like smiling at the way they reacted. Deidara just sat and stared, while Itachi stood and walked over to her. He stopped quite close, and, without making eye contact, spoke.

"Are you sure?"

She nodded. He slumped down onto the table. Neither wanted hug her while the other was there, but they were both longing to hold her and never let her go. A few tears rolled down her cheeks, but she took no notice and wiped them away hurriedly.

"Now, until the baby is born, there's no way of telling whose child it is. But, because of past circumstances…I'm assuming its Deidara's."

Itachi sank further into the wood of the table, burying his face in his hands. Sakura tried to put her hand on his shoulder, but he brushed it away. He looked up at her with hurt in his eyes. Sakura gasped slightly. It was the first time she had seen Itachi show true, sincere emotion before, other than lust. She quickly averted her eyes from his face, the sight too much for her to take. She turned to Deidara, who smiled weakly at her. She smiled back, even weaker, and found her voice.

"No matter what you two or I feel, we can't change it. I don't want to be pregnant, believe me. But there are options. I have considered them all, and decided that the best thing to do would be to give it to the village a few miles away. It would have a loving home there, away from…all this."

Itachi was becoming angry, Sakura could tell. She jumped when he actually showed it.

"All this? What is all this? There's nothing wrong with a child being raised here! And I thought you wanted children."

Sakura was genuinely surprised. He was acting like a child, huffing and puffing and pouting, crossing his arms and staring at the wall. And how the hell did he know she wanted children? She never told him.

She decided to discuss it later.

She turned, once again, to Deidara. But the man looked the same as Itachi, crossing his arms, although he was glaring at her.

"What is it with you two?" she asked.

"Why must you two always act like this if you don't get it your way? Oh, and what! You want the kid to have three parents? It would live here with me, and you Itachi, and you, Deidara! I mean, he might as well belong to all of us! C'mon, Sasori and Kisame and Hidan, get in on the bidding for Sakura's kid!" She was yelling, and she snarled the last few words. She didn't know how they could be so selfish. She threw a chair into the wall, causing the wood to shatter and the wall to crack, exposing the dim light of outside. It had begun to rain, and the thunder drowned out the sound of the chair crashing into the wall. She glared at Itachi fiercely, then turned to Deidara, who fell out of his chair at her gaze. She picked up the table, causing Itachi to fall, as he was sitting on it, and merely tossed it out of the way. She walked through the newly cleared pathway, and exited, stomping violently the entire way.

When she was out of sight and they could no longer hear her passionate cursing and ferocious stomping, Itachi and Deidara looked at each other, both having fallen to the floor. They glared at each other, and Itachi moved to leave. But Deidara started a rant, one that Itachi ignored. Nonetheless, he was stopped from exiting anyway when Hidan, Kisame and Sasori blocked the doorway, the first two fighting to get through first. They moved, however, when they were met with Itachi's icy stare.

"Hey, Itachi, welcome back! Did you get Kazuku, how'd it—"

Itachi exited without a word.

"What's his problem?" asked Hidan. Kisame, who had spoken before, shook his head and laughed.

"He's always like that. You just gotta get used to it."

But they were silent as they surveyed the kitchen. It was originally the loud screaming of Sakura that had drawn them here, but they realized that she had been the one attacking this time, not the victim. The table was upside-down in the corner, one of its legs missing. A chair was shattered against the wall, and the wall itself had a large crack at the point of impact. Lastly, Deidara was in a heap on the floor, but he stood immediately after their entrance, brushing wood shavings and dust off of his pants. (A/N: the Akatsuki members don't usually wear their cloaks in the walls of the compound. They wear their traditional shinobi mesh, with ninja pants or sweatpants.)