llwild1992 (2015)

Anarchy: I Don't Deserve You

Chapter Four: Never-Ending

-X-

"So we're all set?" Tara whispered into the phone as she stood in the kitchen of her house, watching as a pot of water began to boil.

"Yes, I'll pick you up at the bus stop outside of San Diego, what line are you using?"

Pivoting on her good foot Tara's eyes scanned her ticket, "Local bus until I have to transfer to the California Whippet line, my bus leaves at 5 am and after the change I'll be in around nine in the morning."

"And I will be there waiting for you. Perfect, just bring an overnight bag and we'll be set."

"I can't thank you enough for doing this for me Rachel, really."

"Baby girl, Gracie made me promise to look after you, we're family. I wish you'd just come to San Diego and move in with me."

"I don't want to inconvenience your life."

"It wouldn't be an inconvenience, I love you."

"Are you still up for looking at UCSD with me after the doctor's visit?"

"Of course! And miss the chance to be one of those people who embarrass their kids on college visits! Your mom would be so proud that you're hoping to attend her alma mater."

"I wish she was here."

"You and me both, Baby girl, she was more my sister than my cousin's wife. She loved you so much, you and Lia both." At the mention of Lia's name Tara automatically leaned back and looked down the hallway, to ensure her father wasn't within hearing.

"You're going for yearly visits right? It runs on your side of the family too."

Rachel laughed into the phone, "yes I've been tested every year since I was thirty, no cancer of any kind. I promise, Doctor Knowles."

Unable to hold her chuckle back Tara smiled, "I like the sound of that."

"You sure you want to be a doctor? You are one of the best dancers I have ever seen. You could make a career of it once we get you ankle fixed and rehabbed."

"Nah," she shook her head, turning the heat down and opening a box of pasta into the water, "It was just a way to stay out of the house and focused on something, plus it was what mom wanted me to do. She had two left feet and wanted so badly to dance, so Lia and I danced."

"Oh god was she bad!" Rachel laughed, "You should have seen her at her own wedding; the woman could make clown shoes look more graceful. But damn was she a good nurse, she could stitch a cut with her eyes closed and it would seem as though she wasn't even trying."

"That's what I want," Tara imagined wearing the white coat and blue scrubs, working miracle s every day, and being loved for it. "That's my dream."

"Then I will do everything to help you get there, when you apply for student loans use me as your cosigner, I own my salon; I will have better credit than Ben."

"You sure?"

"Absolutely."

"Again I can't find a way to thank you."

"Just follow your dreams; I'll see you in two days."

"Okay, love you, Rachel."

"Love you too, Baby girl." The line then disconnected.

Checking the pasta Tara wondered what San Diego was like, what the possibilities of getting into University and living a new life. Far away from this place. She could hardly wait for the next year to pass, next month she would be seventeen and then the school year would end, summer, and then one more year. She would start applying to all her top schools; Seton Hall, Princeton, George Washington, and of course her reach school; Georgetown. So many things are going to change for me. I can't wait!

"Dad," She called when the pasta was ready, pouring the water through a strainer and catching the pasta, "Dinner." Plating a large helping of noodles she opened the jar of Ragu and generously tossed it. Placing it onto his try, with a glass of water, she headed to his room. "Dad, I have your dinner, you need to eat something today." Standing at his door she waited for him to crawl up off the floor and get the food she offered. "Dad?" leaning until her ear was against it, she hear nothing, groaning she pushed the door open and found his disgustingly dirty room empty and the French glass doors leading to the side yard open. "God damn it!" she groaned.

Fucking unbelievable! He freaking sneaks out; where the hell is he? Running into the kitchen she threw the tray down and gripped the nearest shirt; Jax's sweatshirt, pulling it on she gripped her keys and ran out of the house.

Two hours later, after checking all the bars and hovels in town, Tara started back home, defeated. She didn't have the courage to go into SAMCRO by herself, Jax's bike wasn't there, and she knew Donna and Opie would be off on their own on a Friday night. Of course Jax wasn't there, like hell he'd be without a date tonight. Why the hell do I feel like I need him; I can take care of myself. Kicking the ground as she continued home she wished she was already out of school and in college, actually living a life so far away from this shit town. The street lights flicked on her street, houses were lit and families where having their dinners, peering at her neighbors she remembered those times in jealousy. Mom, Dad, Lia, and Tara, there four of them together and happy. Never again.

Looking up, fisting her key she walked up her driveway, she wouldn't have seen it if she didn't walk into it. Falling onto her butt she glared in both anger and astonishment when she realized the thing she had walked into was Jax Teller's motorcycle. Parked in her driveway. Standing up and putting pressure on her already overused ankle she found him sitting on her stoop, smoking.

"What the hell." Just what I fucking need right now! She groaned, limping away from his bike as his stood. "Seriously?" she headed for him.

"Hey," he smiled as she approached, taking time to enjoy the view of his sweatshirt on her, "I was right," he whistled, "Looks better on you."

"Thanks," she said angrily, "Were you at the clubhouse before you came here?" he nodded, "was my dad there?"

"Drinking away and annoying the fuck out of people. Don't worry Clay will send him home after closing time." As if she is worried. The asshole disappeared and she's been franticly looking for him, for how long?

"Great, can't wait." She couldn't hold back her scornful laughter as she looked back to the house, "did you…" the door was gone, replaced by a thick golden oak door with a yellow metal handle and dead boat. "Change my door?"

"You bet, Opie and Donna dropped it off for me; it wouldn't have fit on the back of my bike—that seat is reserved for you." he smiled enjoying the rose color creeping up her neck as she stood there, reeling in anger and astonishment, "the other one wasn't doing you any good, even fixed the post so it won't stick."

"Why do you keep doing this?" she groaned, "Stop doing nice things for me; I didn't ask you too."

"Well I wanted to, Tara."

"Why?"

"Isn't it obvious?" He smirked, stepping forward, "I like you; I can't stand the thought of you vulnerable with that shitty door in this town."

Crossing her arms she looked from him to the door and then back, "Why?" she asked, eyes now burning green, the blue iris thickening, that was his favorite color.

"I don't know," he shrugged stepping down off her stoop so they were toe-to-toe, she strengthened her back, bringing her actual height up, putting pressure on her bad ankle, damn she was tall for her age, she would have fit perfectly under his chin if he decided to hold her. "But believe men when I say it, Babe, I intend to get to know you better."

"It works both ways, biker-boy," she jabbed a finger into his chest, brining both laughter from his chest and hers, "did I just say that?" she cracked, an infection laugh fell from her lips and soon had him cracking up with her.

Biting down on his lips, not wanting to smile, "you did." Hiding his face by lowering his chin he continued to laugh, "That was impressive; very tense."

"oh shut up," she slapped the sides of her face and blew air between her lips to bring her back to a state of calm, and then returned to being serious, "seriously," she said as he continued to laugh, gripping the sides of his cut at the armholes she pulled on him, the leather moaning at the treatment, "I mean it." She warned, her eyes faded from green to chocolate brown. "Jax!"

"Okay," he pinched the bridge of his nose, fighting back the urge to continue to laugh, "got it, I'm done." He held his hands up in defense as she continued to grip his cut, "What were you saying Babe?"

"Don't call me that," she rasped before giving him a good shake, "listen to what I am saying; you can't just decide to get to know me; I have to let you. Frankly I have no interest in getting into a friendship with you; I've known you all my life, Jax, you're not for me."

"It wasn't a friendship I was thinking of, and who the hell knows what's for them at seventeen?"

"I have a plan, Jax, and I'm sorry to say that you're not in it."

"I have plans too, and you just might be in mine. Tara I'm not saying that you become my old lady, I just want to get to know you right now. We're similar; we can be good friends. Trust me."

"I don't think I should be trusting you."

"Come on," he pouted with an extended lip and big blue eyes, "I know you like me." He circled his finger before her with a happy gleam in her eye, "give me a chance and I bet you'll rethink this."

Weighting her options she released him and took the weight off of her bad foot. Looking at his handsome face, her teenaged hormones screamed to pull him inside and kiss him recklessly; maybe even do something she knew she wasn't ready for; just because he was so freaking good looking. Biting down on her inner cheek she chastised such wanting and really looked at him. He was harmless to her, did nothing but treat her like a lady and do nice things for her. "Well," be brave Tara, "you went through all the trouble to put the new door on, I guess we can hang out for a bit."

"Perfect," he smirked, "now you can have this," he dangled a new key before her.

When she moved to take it he laughed and pulled it behind him. "Seriously?"

"Gotta pay the toll, Babe." He leaned down to her, "kiss me."

"Or you'll deny me entrance into my own house?" her refined dark brow raised in amusement, "I could just kick you in the balls and run to the back doors."

Damn she's good. "Good thing I closed those too."

Groaning, Tara stood before him, gripped his lapels and pulled him to her. For once Jax thought she was giving in, but instead she kissed his cheek, and quickly with fast reflexes she pulled the keys from him and pushed away.

"Got ya!" she laughed, swinging the ring around her finger with a pleased smile.

"Damn," he smirked.

"I rebel against peer-pressure."

"I'll get you to kiss me." He laughed, pointing to her door, "Trust me."

"I don't." she stuck her tongue out at him.

Damn she had no idea she was flirting right back at him, she was fucking adorable like that. She pushed passed him and opened the new door, without having to push it open, smooth like butter. She nearly denied him entrance throwing her small frame between him and the door, holding onto the post with her long fingers, but Jax wasn't having any of that. Taking hold of her waist he lifted her up into the air.

"What are you doing? Put me down!" she laughed as he walked into her home kicking the door in the process.

The house smelled like bleach, as if she threw it down onto the floor and scrubbed. The whole place was spotless, everything neatly placed together. Placing her down Jax warded off her light meaningless punches to his chest, playfully acting as though they hurt, she smiled however.

"Nice house." He complemented, "Smells clean."

"Captain Obvious." She rolled her eyes as she toe-ed her shoed off and took them up in her hand, "Shoes off," she motioned to his tennis shoes, before walking to a closet next to the door, opening it and placed her shoes neatly on the small shoe rack.

"I wash these every morning." He laughed, but he took them off out of respect, "even bleach the laces clean."

"What is it with boys and their shoes?" she groaned, taking them from him and placing them next to hers.

"Taking care of your kicks is like taking care of a nice car or bike; it's a pride thing." He watched as she rolled the information over in her head, deemed it useless, and rolled her eyes again before closing the door.

Her dark eyes then captured his, realizing they were now alone, in a house, with no adult. Blushing five different shades of red and pink she quickly ran into the kitchen, deciding it wasn't worth the panic to dwell on the matter. "Make yourself at home—no smoking please, would you like some reheated, probably really mushy spaghetti?"

"That sounds great." He laughed throwing his head back before he make use of this time to look over the few picture frames on the walls. "Who's this?" Jax said looking into the picture frames on the wall near the kitchen, finding multiple images of Tara and another girl, one who looked similar to her, but a bit older.

"My older sister Lia," Tara said as she put the bows of pasta into the microwave, "She died from leukemia when I was seven."

"I'm sorry," fist her sister died from cancer, then her mother. What else has she gone through? He walked into the kitchen and leaned against the archway, watching as she watched the timer, "my brother Tommy died six years ago, from a heart defect."

"I'm sorry."

"So we both lost a parent and a sibling." He mused, "My dad and your mom. My younger brother and your older sister."

"Thanks captain obvious." She snorted, "Want to make it a competition to see who's suffered more loss in their life? I think I'll win." She looked over at him with dark hazel eyes, glazed over with tears she wouldn't let fall, and smirked. The alarm went off and she made no move to open the microwave.

"I could pull the 'great grandparents were murdered at a death camp during the holocaust' card, but I won't." Jax pulled a twisted smile towards her, charm seemed to ooze from him, even when revealing a family tragedy.

"You're Jewish?" she asked.

"Nah, my dad was Irish Catholic; I was baptized so I guess I am too." he smirked, "my mom identifies with being a Christian when the moment suits her, but she never pulls the Russian-Jew card ever. I did go to CCD when I was a kid, but being religious never was my thing."

"I'm catholic." She stated as she popped the microwave open and pulled out the bowls, not even wincing at the heat that he knew burned her hands. Turning away she covered the pasta worth the now warm sauce from the pan on the stove and offered him one.

Taking it from her hands he watched as she began to wash the pans she had used and put them away, only then did she take her own bowl. "No time like the present?" he smirked.

She looked at him, hazel eyes full of questioning as she twirled her fork, "more like apprehension."

"Your dad expects a clean home at all times?"

"More or less, appearances are everything to him."

"Yet he stumbles around drunk all the time."

Walking past him Tara lead him into the small dining room, "you should see our garage, full of bottles and my mom and Lia's stuff. He won't throw anything away, which is why I always clean, to take away some of his anxiety."

"Why do you put yourself through this?" he asked, taking a seat beside her, "why care so much?"

"He's all the family I have left in this world. As crazy as it sounds; I love my dad. He was a good dad before Lia and mom died."

"So out of pity for the past you take care of him."

"I don't want to." She shrugged.

They ate in silence, there was nothing more to say. Jax was a ball of energy, he felt like a kid on a first date. Hell he was a kid on a first date. Tara was…amazingly strong and kind. He could hardly believe she managed to come out this good in such an abusive home. The way she skirted around her dad, he didn't want to question if he had laid hands on her. He didn't want to think about Tara and her small frame and nearly weightless body being thrown or hit. It made him want to beat the shit out of her father.

Tara could hardly believe how nice Jax Teller really was. She knew he was kind; who would put a door up for someone he barely knew? It was ridiculous of how little she knew about him. They had grown up in the same Small Town USA, seen the same things, experienced the same stuff, but never really knew each other. That was the beauty of getting to know someone you've 'known' from a small town, they're always the opposite of the judgment you make of them.

"So," Jax finally said as he pushed his plate away, "what do we do now?"

"Scrabble?" she offered as a joke.

"I'm not a 'wordy' person."

"I think you're smarter than you give yourself credit for."

"Nah," he brushed it off, leaning back to look at her, "TV?"

She looked away, "own a lot still on that, only the VHS works."

"Alright then, show me what ya got!" he clapped his fingers together, "been a while since I watched a movie."

"We don't have much, a lot of kids stuff."

"Got The Land Before Time? Tommy loved that movie. Who would have thought a cartoon dinosaur could make my mom cry?"

That was Lia's favorite movie too. She blushed and got up, taking their plates quickly before joining him in the family room. He sat down as if he owned the place. Completely dominating the room as he leaned back into the old couch, resting his entire wingspan across the back. Kneeling down onto the floor, she retrieved the box of movies from under the small television, looking down.

"Terminator or Gone with the Wind?" she held them up, "the rest are like potty-training movies or travel tapes, Lia wanted to see the world, so mom bought her the entire National Geographic selection." Why am I explaining this? Oh right, I literally have two movies.

Jax looked at the two in his hands, "I've seen Schwarzenegger chase after the girl to many times, Opie's favorite."

"You two have movie nights together?" she batted her eyes, speaking in falsetto with a dumb smile on her face.

"Best friends, always hung out together; before we got our licenses—or our girls." She blushed and looked away from him, "what's this other one about?"

"You've never seen it?"

"Nope."

"Story of the deep south during and after the Civil War, and a romantic Clark Gable."

"No thank you, I don't do 'romantic' shit." He whistled, "What kind of places did Lia dream of visiting?" he asked, Looking down she read the titles off to him quickly. "Want to watch about the Rain Forests?"

"Sure," she laughed, quickly popping it into the player and turning on the TV, when the blue screen appeared she put everything back in its place and turned to look at Jax. Her stomach sunk and her skin turned cold, "um…" crap.

Jax enjoyed the torment on her face, "get over here." He motioned to the seat on the right side of him. "Remember; I won't bite."

"Unless I ask you." She laughed, remembering their conversation from the party, "Which I want."

"Darn," he fayed being upset as she sat down beside her, her eyes darted to his hand, almost as if she knew he was itching to touch her.

The screen turned black and then drowning sound of a man's voice filled the room. Damn I was like being back in class, monotone professor talking very slowly about some shit he personally didn't give a fuck about. Looking down he could see Tara always gave her full attention, she was sitting perfectly still, taking everything in, as if she was going to be tested on it. Her hair was pulled over her left shoulder and fell down her side and onto her lap. Her hair was so freaking long and silky, the thought of it pooled over a pillow or better yet over his head, creating a curtain around their fused mouths as they fu—made love….Jax fought the images away, damn.

"Stop staring at me." She muttered, surprising him, was he thinking out loud or something. He felt his body go hot and then cold, her green eyes shifted as she leaned back into him, looking up directly at him as her head fitted perfectly into his shoulder, "what are you thinking?"

"What's the meaning behind yours and Lia's name?" he asked, fuck he could see down her shirt at this angle.

Really? For a moment there I thought he had a fever, I can feel the heat wafting off of him even now! "My dad is Irish, grandparents came here in after WWII, Lia Fáil is the Coronation stone of the Irish Kings and it is located on Hill of Tara. It is literally the Coronation Stone of Tara. And my sure name means: valorous desire."

"So your parents named you after it, both of you." She nodded, "Want me to tell you what your name means?"

"Just because you're an honor student I'll let you." He joked, "Jackson Nathaniel Teller." He said his full name.

She smirked and pressed closer into him, "Jackson means 'son of jack' is your dad's name John or Johnathan."

"Yup,"

"So your name is literally son of Jack—John. I'm guessing Nathaniel is a relative's name, it is Hebrew for 'Given of God, or gifted by God'... and Teller means 'parent, father, farmer or builder' in German."

"Why are you so freaking smart?"

"Have to be when you want out." She smiled.

"Out of what?"

"Charming." She sighed, closing her eyes, "away; so far away."

"Do you want out now?" he asked, feeling a flush creep up his neck. There he was with Tara Knowles leaning against him, totally off guard, sleepy, pliant, and fuckab—god damn it! He stiffened not wanting to be aroused right now, that shit with this girl; might be too powerful. Tara is really jumpy, just get to know her before you try to get her into bed. She's not that kind of girl.

Holy motherfucking shit, when did I become this guy?

Tara felt his body heat up again, his chest tightened and he breathed in deeply. His eyes shifted from hers to the TV. Damn, he's terribly agitated. Looking to his hand on the back of the couch, she watched as he made a fist, his skin scraping against itself as he attempted to calm down became prevalent. Jax Teller on his best behavior. She mused, reaching for his hand, surprising him when she pulled it towards her, carefully she waited until he relaxed in her colder touch, allowing her to pry his larger fingers away from the palm of his hand.

"So how long have you've been a mechanic?" she asked looking at his callous, feeling the roughness of his own hand in comparison to her meeker and more delicate hand.

"I've always been on bikes, my dad and Clay both showed me how to care for bikes and cars, so I guess I've always been a greases-monkey." He watched as she measured her hand against his, when she laid her right hand against his, quickly he laced their fingers and held hers. "You didn't answer my question."

"What question was that?" she leaned back into him and looked up, wide hazel eyes matching the dimly lit room.

"Do you want to leave?" he asked again.

"Charming; yes."

"What about now?" he smiled.

"Right now; no." she smiled. Sinking further into his side, making herself comfy, "I rather like it here." She kindly smiled and brought his arm around her neck, making him hold her. She felt him stiffen again, but his thumb began to run across her collarbone softly. His heat just wafted off of him in waves, she felt as though he was counting his breaths, how measured they were. Closing her eyes she listed to him breath and soon began to count with him.

One Mississippi, two Mississippi...ten Mississippi, god! What are you a champion at holding breath contests? Yawing she had enough, pushing away from him abruptly she threw his hand away from her and turned, sitting on her knees next to him. Sweet baby Jesus he's as red as a tomato!

With a smile on her lips she leaned into him, watching as he leaned back, turning another shade of red, as if he was trying to gage what it was she was thinking, but soon smiled back and challenged her, coming forward.

"What?" he asked.

"Why do you like me?" she asked, raising her brow.

"Why shouldn't I?" he recanted, "You're beautiful, intelligent, kind, thoughtful, hardworking."

"And all of that is attractive?"

"Abso-FUCKING-lutely." He chuckled, reaching up with one hand to remove a large section of her hair from her face, throwing it around her back, "All of you is attractive to me." He admitted, "It's taking all of my resistance to force my hands away." He allowed himself the pleasure of cupping her fuller cheek in his hand.

"Why don't you?" she asked, bravely putting a hand on his shoulder, "you're a living furnace," she smiled, biting down on her lip, "it's kind of driving me crazy."

"What is?" he smirked, knowing fully well what it was.

"That you're on your best behavior. You haven't made a move to touch me all night."

"I thought that was what you wanted?" he laughed, throwing his head back, "I thought you wanted all the touches to go away."

"I lied." She sighed, "it's just..." looking back into his blue eyes she fought for the courage to say it, she might never have the gall to do it again, "I've never been wanted before... and I was...embarrassed for wanting you... to touch me..." he leaned in closer, running his hand over her neck, holding her, "to kiss me." She whispered, her eyes on his lips.

Without a moment's hesitation Jax pulled her down to him, sealing his lips around hers. She tensed for a moment, but was soon wrapping her arms around his neck, falling across his lap, somehow she managed to straddle his long legs, kissing him back. Moving between open mouth kisses and sweet butterfly light kisses. Jax kept his hands north of everything, wrapping his hands into her long hair. Enjoying the softness of her unpracticed kisses. Her delicate little hands held the back of his neck, playing with the short hair that now stood up on end. Both couldn't contradict the electricity of this never-ending kiss.

It was as if they were breathing without letting go.

Tara suddenly pulled away, blushing, giggled and leaned back, Jax instantly wrapped his arms around her waist to keep her there, just there. It wasn't sexual to him, such a thing with one of the girls who followed the club would be sexual, but not with Tara. It was just having her close to him, at last. She blushed five different shades of red and pulled her locks behind her ears. They both were smiling like dammed idiots.

"Was I your first kiss?" he mused, licking his lips, for once he didn't taste the wax of balms of lipsticks, it was just Tara.

"No," she admitted, Jax responded by pulling her roughly against him and kissed her harder, making her laugh. "Are you jealous?"

"Yes," he admitted, kissing her again, "Who was he?" just in case I have to punch him in the face if she seed him on a regular basis.

"My duet partner Gabe…we dated for a little bit before I broke my foot." Seeing the look in his eye, borderline jealous she smirked. Wow, how the mighty have fallen, Jax Teller jealous of my ballet partner. "I'm not going to ask you about your past." Go back to kissing, kissing is nice.

Midway through another heated kiss Jax leaned back, "when you mean partner you mean a…"

Rolling her eyes Tara leaned back, threading her fingers through the hair behind his ears again, "a straight guy who does ballet; his mother was my instructor, he's third generation dancer. Not all men who do ballet are gay. He was my partner since I was eight."

"What happened to him?"

"He dances for the California National Company now, I haven't seen him since I broke my foot."

"How did you break it?"

He noticed that she blanched for a moment before calming down, "Stupid me, out back my foot got caught in the cement holes and trapped under the patio pavement, fell forward and broke my foot."

Jax knew she wasn't telling the truth, how could someone so graceful, a fucking ballerina, be clumsy like that? The way she reacted to the question was another thing that bothered him. She had gone cold, feeling her skin against his fingers, she was bullshitting the story, she looked away from him and bit down on her already plump lip.

"You going to tell me the truth?"

Damn! She inwardly cursed, "It was an accident, really, and I am a klutzes."

"We both know you're not."

"Fine," she groaned, "it was the night after my last recital, and there was a scout from the New York Ballet Company and one from Julliard. I got really excited and called my cousin, well I was being too loud and my dad woke up. He got upset that I was talking about leaving; that I was wanting more from life than I deserved."

"He didn't?"

"He took me out back, threw me down and broke my foot with a hammer. If I couldn't dance, I wouldn't leave him."

"I'll kill him."

"Don't," she hushed him, holding his face between her hands, "Don't; I don't care, I already forgave him."

"There is nothing to forgive."

"Jax listen to me, please? I danced to get a college scholarship, to get a chance at a good school. It's not like I want to be a professional. Besides Ballerinas are retied at twenty five." She huffed, he wasn't getting it, he looked to the door, "Jax," she took his chin in her hand and forced him to look at her, "I've got one and a half year more with him, then I'm done."

As if on cue lights lit up the windows. Tara's eyes widened as she looked to the door. "CRAP!" she turned deep purple as she looked down, his hands were on her thighs, "Off!" she slid them away and flew from his lap, "you have to go!" she was throwing his cut and his shoes at him.

"Calm down babe."

"Seriously, he doesn't like change the door..." she froze as her father's drunken voice filled the tiny little stoup.

They both stopped breathing.

Something hit the door, "FUCKING LITTLE CUNT! TARA GRACE WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE DOOR! HANDLES ARE FOR BUCKETS!" he screamed banging his fists against the doors.

"Out the back!" she flew down the hall as Jax was pulling his shoes on.

"Tara wait!" he whispered back as he hopped after her, finding one of his fingers caught under his own foot. When he pulled it on he heard the handle jiggled and then burst open. As if he was a kid caught with his hands in the cookie jar he raced off into the darkness of the house after Tara.

"TARA GRACE!" something was tipped over and smashed, "I'LL FUCKING BREAK YOUR OTHER FOOT!"

Tara gripped Jax's arm and somehow swung him into her room closing the door, making quick work of the deadbolt she had rigged on it. Jax was surprised as he pulled his cut on, she had to deadbolt herself into her own room. Turning and resting her back onto the door, she fought off tears as her father banged on her door, swearing. Her now dark sad brown eyes looked at him in the darkness, as if she was apologizing for all of it.

Just when he was about to reach for her and carry her out of this place she advanced on him, threw her arms around his shoulders and kissed him. Really kissed him. As if this could have been the last kiss anyone in this world would have. All the life she had in her body she poured it into him. Holding her head in his hand he kissed her back, not wanting to let her go.

Pulling away she pushed him to her only window, "You have to go."

"I'm not leaving you."

"I'll be fine," she kissed him again, "I promise."

It was the courage in her eyes that made him slowly mauve his way out of her bedroom and onto the grass. She leaned out the window and looked so beautiful with the stars behind her. This is some Romeo and Juliet shit.

"What are you doing Friday?" Tara went cold, "I was thinking we could head out to Round Valley, maybe go swimming?"

"Actually I will be in san Diego from Thursday to Saturday."

"Why?"

"I'm seeing a specialist for my ankle on Thursday."

"Who's taking you?"

"I'm meeting my second cousin Rachel and the SD bus station, she's my godmother." Reaching over she ran her finger and thumb over his short stubble, "you know, if you hadn't come and rescued me when you did, this wouldn't have been possible." Fighting back her tears she closed her eyes, "I never properly thanked you."

"You don't need to, Babe." He smirked, leaned back in to take her lips, bringing her back to life. Hand threaded through his hair as she pulled him closer. He wanted to do more than kiss her, he wanted to possess her utterly. "Tell me to leave." He whispered as he leaned his forehead into her, breathing in deeply to steel his urge to jump through the window.

Licking her lips, Tara looked into his sky blue eyes and understood, it was a warning. She nearly wanted to tell him to stay, but instead she smirked, "leave."

Kissing her once more Jax looked into her green eyes, "Call me when you get to San Diego."

"Okay,"

-X-

"Tara!" looking to where the voice came from, Tara couldn't fight the excitement when she found Rachel standing at the side, waving her hands excitedly. "Baby girl!" she laughed as she ran for her, quickly wrapping Tara in a large and warm hug.

"Hey Rachel."

"Let me look at you," pushing her away and lifting her large brown sunglasses up she looked over her cousin, blanching at what she found, "fuck," she growled angrily, "Is he still out of work? Have you been eating?"

"I'm naturally very thin, Rachel." Tara looked away and pulled her jacked more over her, "I did ballet for twelve years."

"Like hell," Rachel closed her eyes and faced the sky, praying for the strength. "Okay," she decided it wasn't worth arguing with her about it, "but while you're here you are eating all the fattening and greasy food I can push in front of you."

Laughing Tara pulled her sunglasses over her ears and onto her nose, "Can't wait for it."

Wrapping her arms around Tara Rachel started to lead her away, but when a payphone caught her eye Tara pulled away, "give me a second?" she asked, searching her pocket for some money, but was presented with a pay cared from Rachel instead, "Thanks." She blushed before headed to make a call. Reading the back of the card, having never used one before, she followed the instructions and made her call.

"Teller-Morrow, this is Opie speaking." Opie's slightly higher voice said on the other line, distorted by the call.

"Hey," she leaned into the booth, afraid someone would hear her for some reason, "Opie its Tara Knowles."

Immediately she heard his smile, "hey Tara what's shaking?"

"Not much, is Jax in?"

"He made a run to NAPA you just missed him by a few minutes, you swinging by to see him? Donna's coming by after work, do you need a ride?"

"No that's not necessary, I'm actually out of town for a few days, Jax wanted me to give him a call when I got to my destination to tell him my cousin picked me up."

"He's that hooked on you?" Opie laughed, "God that's disgusting."

"What's disgusting is how you look at Donna, like you're going to melt when she looks at you." She joked, "Look," Rachel was checking her watch, her appointment was in a half an hour, "can you just tell him I'm here?"

Breathing heavily Opie sighed, "Okay."

"Thank you, Opie."

"Not a problem Tara, have a good time."

"Thanks, see ya."

-X-

"Well there is minimal damage to your tendons and your leg otherwise is very much healed, but this fracture," the doctor pointed to the x-ray of Tara's foot, to the fracture on her ankle that was literally grinding on itself, "I am very surprised you're able to walk on it as you have."

"I have a high threshold for pain." Tara shrugged her shoulders.

"I would have to agree," The doctor said in astonishment, "With all you're bone spurs too," he rubbed his chin with his hand, "what is your goal?"

"My goal?"

"I can simply fix your ankle, you'd have a slight weakness in your ankle and the position you stand on it will be lightly altered. But if you wish to dance point on it professionally and not recreationally, it might be impossible. You do know this is a career ending break, most Prima Ballerinas spend their whole lives fearing this type of break because I might have to put a rod in your leg."

"I don't plan on being a Prima, I'm too old anyway."

"Well then," he smiled, "I can schedule you for a re-break on Friday, I kept the appointment open just in case, depending on how the re-brake goes I'll see if you need the rod or just a boot."

"Thank you!"

-X-

"Oh isn't that one cute?" Rachel laughed as they sat at the university café, admiring a cute boy who was leading a campus tour, "See anyone cute for you Tara?"

"For me?" she laughed, sitting her lemonade as she avoided looking at the boy, "no,"

"Come on, at your age you should be chasing boys, lord knows Gracie and I were terrible; especially together." She mused remembering the good old days, "I swear if she didn't get a job at St. Thomas she would have never met your dad; hell I wouldn't have even mentioned my cousin to her."

"That's harsh," Tara frowned, "Lia and I wouldn't have been born."

"The only good thing to come from that man." She snorted, "So really there is no one?"

Tara didn't want to admit it, but a light flush came over her face, "well there is…"

"Tara Grace; a boy?"

"Yes."

"An actual boy?"

"Yeah," She chuckled, looking down to her folded hands, "At first I didn't want to like him; it would be a distraction and I can't afford that from work and school and getting out of Charming, but he just…Rachel he pushed his way through my walls and blindsided me."

"That is great," Rachel reached over to hold her hand, "what's his name? Is he a Jock? Is he smart; I bet he is? Please tell me before I go crazy?"

"Um…his name is Jax Teller, he's seventeen, about six foot, wide shoulders, that mix of rugged and drop dead handsome with very strong facial features, flaxen hair; he needs a haircut, and he is…charismatic and determined."

"Jax; sexy." She smirked.

"Rachel you're old enough to be his mother."

"Let me visualize, come on."

"No,"

"We have to talk about boys!" she lifted her chair and scooted closer, causing Tara to blush and look away, "do we need to have The Talk?"

"Disgusting," She shook in disgust in the idea of taking about sex with her cousin, "no we do not. Mom beet you to it like ten years ago."

"Have you reached that point with him yet? Absence is the best way to prevent both STDs and pregnancy, but there are condoms, oral contraception, ooh I was a big fan of the diaphragm myself."

"Seriously," Tara slapped her hand over her cousin's mouth, "People can here you. Which one of us is the teenager here?"

"Clearly I am."

-X-

Tara blushed as she looked out her bus window, seeing Jax standing there in all his leather clad glory, waiting for her. When he caught her eyes, his hands instantly removed his sunglasses and he smiled. It was like a million watts, his whole being looked so young when he smiled, so charming and handsome. She was the only one on the bus, so the driver helped her reach the overnight bag, wishing her well.

As painful as it was she nearly ran down the length of the bus and jumped off of it. He winked at her and the revealed what it was he was holding behind his back, a arrangement of orange, yellow, and green flowers, all different variants of the shades. What Tara didn't know was that they represented her eyes, the changeable color, and the part of her that utterly captivated him.

Oh my god...I think I love him...

"Hey," Jax smiled as he waited for Tara to approach.

"Hi," she blushed.

"Nice boot." He smiled, looking down at the large black caste on her foot.

"Thought while I was in San Diego that I'd accessorize." She accepted the flowers from him, taking in the fragrance, before breaking off one of the colored green and placing it behind her ear.

I might just...no...I will love this woman.

"Get over here." He finally said, opening his arms.

Instantly she found herself wrapped up in him, kissing him, as if it would never end.

Love, Lauren xoxo

Word Count: 7290

Page Count: 17 (my lucky number)