" So how are you feeling?" Clary finally asked. They'd been awkwardly sitting on Jace's bed for about fifteen minutes in complete silence.
" I don't know." Jace ran his hand through his hair and leaned back on the bed closing his eyes.
" Upset I guess. I just really wish… he'd chosen me."
He looked up and saw Clary's confused gaze.
" Since we were little, Jonathan's father never particularly liked me much. So, often he would purposely make plans that would interfere with ours. Like one time we planned to go on a camping trip for the weekend, but then the day before we left Valentine told Jonathan that he had planned a road trip for that weekend and he couldn't go camping with me. they ended up getting into a huge fight about it so the next day he blew him off and came with me anyways. He had this giant bruise on his arm though." Jace paused for a second, lost in his own thoughts.
" I guess I feel like the one time it really mattered, he'd finally chosen him over me."
Clary looked down at her lap letting her hair fall forward like a curtain, covering her tears.
" He was talking to you then." She finally said after what felt like hours. " His last words were about to be 'I love you'."
Jace grabbed Clary's hand and pulled her down to lie next to him on the bed. She lay her head on his chest, feeling his steady heart beat pound against her head.
" Jace? Do you miss him a lot?" Clary asked after minutes of silence.
" yeah." He finally said. " I do."
Clary couldn't help it anymore. A tear finally managed to escape her eyes and then it was like suddenly the dam was broken and the tears wouldn't stop. All this time she'd been so worried about Jace and how he as handling the death of his best friend, but in all that time it only just struck her that Jonathan was really dead. That her only brother was dead.
" Clary, It's okay. We're going to be okay. Loss is something we all need to learn to deal with."
Clary nodded her head. He sat up, pulling her up with him, and wiped the tears from her eyes with the sleeve of his shirt.
It took Clary half an hour to finally calm down, and the whole time Jace cradled her in his arms, trying to soothe her with his calm steady voice. When she'd finally stopped shaking in his arms, Jace got up and lead her to the kitchen. There he made her a grilled cheese sandwich.
" Didn't think you could cook." Clary sniffled. It was the first thing she'd said since the tears had finally stopped flowing they're heavy stream.
" I can't really," He answered, eyes glinting. " A few years ago though, Mayrise had had to go on some business trip, so she'd left Alec, Izzy, Max and me home alone for three days. When she'd come back, we had all basically starved ourselves since none of us could cook…. Izzy tried a few times but it was so bad we couldn't eat it."
Clary laughed, imagining little versions of her friends standing around a kitchen with spatulas and whisks in their hands, confused expressions written on all of their faces.
" After that, Mayrise showed each of us how to make one dish, so that if we were ever put into that situation again, we would all know how to make at least one thing so we wouldn't starve ourselves again."
Clary looked down at the perfect grilled cheese that Jace had dropped onto a plate and skidded toward her.
" I see you've perfected your dish by now." Clary said, cutting the sandwich in half.
She took one of the pieces before sliding the plate back over to Jace. They bit into they're sandwiches, which were delicious. After quickly fishing they're small meal they made their way back to Jace's room.
" So," Jace said smiling, " How was your seventeenth birthday Clary?"
They were sitting cross-legged on the soft carpet floor facing towards each other.
Clary laughed. " It was almost wonderful."
" Almost?" Jace asked, rasing an eyebrow.
" Well, I sort of cried a lot so that took it down a notch…"
Jace smiled at her. " Well maybe we can change that…"
He took her hand, pulling her toward him. Slowly he leaned in until Clary could feel his soft lips touching her own. His hands went around her waist and pulled her towards him until she was straddling his hips. Her arms moved to place themselves around his neck, they're kiss becoming more and more intense. Finally Clary had to break for air.
Jace took this as opportunity to kiss down her neck, continuing lower and lower, until Clary's hands moved- as if by themselves- to Jace's face, pulling it back down to her own so that her lips could reach his once again. She loved this feeling. The feeling of him, the feeling of his undivided attention. She loved the way his lips felt moving against her own and the texture of his hair as her hands enveloped themselves in it.
Jace stood up, taking Clary up with him and carrying her over to the bed. He sat down on the edge, Clary still straddling his hips. During this time, they didn't one loose touch. Slowly Jace's hands started to move down Clary's body, stopping at her waist to play with the hem of her shirt. Clary gasped as his hands began to slip underneath the loose garment, sliding up her back and about to undue her-
There was a knock at the door.
" Hey guys?" Alec said. " Can I come in or is this a bad time…"
Clary blushed as she got off of her boyfriend.
" Ummm… We'll be out in a minute Alec. just uh… Hold on."
Clary gave Jace one more light kiss on the lips before fixing his hair to look like they hadn't just been making out. Then she took his hand, and lead him out of the room to go talk to Alec.
" We're continuing this later," Jace whispered into Clary's ear right before opening the door. She blushed.
There are two things I would like to tell you guys. Number one is, in this story, Jace and Clary will never actually do it. I wouldn't feel comfortable writing it for one thing, and I honestly believe that seventeen is just two young too young to loose your virginity. I know they did it in the books, but in my story, that won't be happening. The second thing I would like to inform you about is that there are very few chapters left in this story. Probably only two or three plus an epilogue, so be aware. I want to thank everyone who's actually read this monstrosity of a story from the beginning. I would love to hear from you guys in the reviews! Maybe if I get enough of them I might update faster... I really appreciate you guys reading this, an I hope you continue reading until the end. I love you guys so much! Read on shadowhunters, read on.