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Chapter 3

Percy

I open my door and immediately slam it shut. I don't care if my roommate is here but luckily he isn't. Instantly, I go to the bathroom and spray water on my face. I can't get the voices that keep running through my head to stop and I feel as if I am going insane.

Why now! I thought I was getting better!

The voices echo in my head repeating and nothing seems to be drowning them out. I decided maybe a hot shower would help because the water always seems to take me out away from it all. I turn on the water with the flick of my wrist thanks to my powers and hop in. The water feels good but I can't stop the voices and they get worse.

By the time we are done with you Jackson, you will be DAMAGED!

My captors words and laugh ring in my head and slowly, I lean up against the shower's wall and slide down to the ground. I put my head in my hands and try to think of anything else except the voices. I also think about how rude I was to Annabeth.

Why was I so cold to Annabeth. She was just trying to help me? But little does she know that I have been doing worse then I have let on the last few years. I can't tell her or she will think I am not worth it. She can't find out how messed up I am.

I get out of the shower and wrap a towel around me. Slowly, I look up in to mirror to catch my reflection, and in front of me is a stranger. I don't recognize the person staring at me.

Damaged. Damaged DAMAGED!

As I look at the scars and burns that crowd my body, those voices keep repeating what I fear if I tell Annabeth and I can't risk that. If I tell her, she will think I am delicate or mentally unstable. I run my hand through one scar across my chest and my bottom lip quivers as a soft sob escapes my mouth and my body shakes. Unable to support my trembling body, I lean against the bathroom countertop as tears run down my cheeks. I whisper to myself over and over.

"It's ok. It's ok" all the while the horrible voices keep repeating scarred for life and damaged.

I grab the sides of my head and scream through my clenched teeth, hopefully scaring away the voices. Finally a while of sobbing in my bathroom, I go to get changed and begin another night of torture. As I am getting dressed, my phone rings. I answer it and it's Annabeth.

" Hello" I answer emotionless.

Her voice sounds like she has been crying for a while too.

" Percy, I had an awful dream-."

" I'll be there in 5 min." I hang up the phone, quickly get dressed and head over to her place.

When I get there, Annabeth opens the door and immediately hugs me while starting to cry into my chest.

I comforted her and tell her," It's over now. It's not real. " as I stroke her back.

She then says, " I didn't have a nightmare, Percy. I just wanted to make sure you were ok. You seemed so hurt and upset but you wouldn't let me help you," She looks up at me with her watery, gorgeous grey eyes and continues," Percy, please tell me what happened. I want to help you."

I know that I should not have been mad at her earlier and I feel bad that she is crying because of me. She's right, she needs to know what has been going on for the last couple of years since the war and I haven't been completely honest with her about it. I sigh and hold her hand as I take her over to the couch. She sits down while I pace her dorm room and finally when I am ready to talk, I move to the window and look out of it with my back towards her. I don't want her to see my pain and I take a deep breath and say.

" Ever since the war we both haven't been the same. You already know that I don't eat as much as I use to and you know that is because of how we were starving down there and how my torturers starved us even more. But I haven't been completely honest with you about my other effects from the Tarturus. Most nights I am lucky to get three hrs of sleep. I have these awful nightmares about my torture and that hell and I can't sleep at all. I have tried taking medicine and I even went to Will to find anything to stop them but nothing seems to help me. I also have had flashbacks recently and that's what has been happening to me today. I have them once in a while but they have been happening more frequently and I don't know why. I just didn't want you to think that I am weak or insane." I then look back at her and her eyes are stormy and beautiful. She comes over to me and then grabs my hand and says.

"Percy, I never would have thought that. You are the strongest person I know. And trust me I think we are both are a little mental. But you should not keep that from the people you love, especially me. We have been through a lot together and you shouldn't be afraid to tell me. I just feel awful that this has been happening to you and I haven't helped you. But from now on you have to let someone in Percy, you got to me in."

She tightens her grip on my hand and I look at her and know that she's right.

Annabeth pov

He looks at me with so much pain and hurt.

" You're right. I am sorry, I should have told you earlier."

I put my hand on his cheek and tell him," You should never be afraid of telling me anything Percy. Good or bad, I will stand by you. I love you."

His eyes search mine and it seems like those were the exact words he needed to hear. He has been having such insecurities about this and now that I have validated him and shown him he is worth loving and I love him no matter what he seems to look better. He suddenly grabs my face and kisses me passionately. I run my hands through his raven black hair and a slight moan escapes his mouth. Our lips fight for dominance and he sucks my bottom lip as I pull him closer by wrapping my arms around his strong neck. A fire as sparked in both of us and I thinks it's because Percy feels loved and secure now, and hopefully he feels like a weight has been lifted off of him. We break for air briefly and then his lips crash back onto mine and in the process, he pushes me up against the wall. He hitches me up unto his hips and I lock my legs around him as he runs his warm hands up my body. He holds me steady as he walks toward my bed and gently lays me down. Our lips break once again and he looks down at me with loving dilated eyes. His lips are swollen like mine and his hair is more messed up then it usually is because of my fingers. I sigh and grab the back of his neck to pull him down and we kiss again hungrily and I moan into his lips as his hands slowly move up into my shirt. Quickly, we hurry to get our binding clothes off and his lips trail my neck as he pulls my body closer to his and he whispers, "I love you so much."

Slowly, I feel him inside me and we move in sync together,crashing into each other as we always have when we want to physically show each other our love for one another. Our sweaty, moaning bodies both reach our climax and through a series of quickened breathes and trembling skin, we finally completely fall into each other and I breathe out.

"I love you too."

Percy

As I fall asleep in Annabeth's arms but despite that, the nightmares come like they always do.

" Percy, stay awake I need to heal your wounds. Shit! All of the ambrosia and nectar is gone! Damn it Percy, you're going to be ok."

" Annabeth, do you here that?"

A figure comes out of no where and knocks out annabeth. She is laying on the floor and there is blood all around her head.

"ANNABETH!"

I wake up with startled and I am covered in sweat. I sit up on the bunk and put my head in my hands, my fingers trembling against my temples. Annabeth wakes up and says

" Was that one of your dreams?"

I answered shakenly.

" Y-yes. It...it was awful."

She rubs my back and says " It's ok Percy, it's over you're here with me. Now try to go back to sleep, you got swimming in two hours. I love you." she kisses me on my cheek and rolls over to fall quickly asleep again.

I lay back down and know I wasn't going to be able to sleep. I lay there staring at the bottom of the bunk and I put my arm around Annabeth. She snuggles up next to my chest and I hold her tighter, trying to get the feeling of the nightmare out of my system. She is safe and in my arms. It felt good telling Annabeth but I still feel helpless about what to do about my nightmares and flashbacks, considering how disruptive they are to my life.

How am I going to get better? Will I ever be some what normal again? I ask myself these questions as I lay there alone in my thoughts in the harsh darkness.