"What?" Myka repeats with a quiver in her voice.
"Mom," Pete shakes his head, "this was my decision and it was already made. You had no right-"
"No right? No right? You are my son. My child! You are not dying, not on my watch."
"Not on mine either" Myka moves to stand besides Jane.
"Myka I can explain. We thought it would be better if you didn't know. You'd forget me anyway."
Myka pauses for a second letting the entirety of this betrayal sink in. It is only then that she realizes 'we' means Pete and someone else and the sinking feeling in her gut tells her who one of the other members of the 'we' is. Her wife, of course. Myka should have noticed the difference in Helena's demeanor. She should have known that look etched into her face since their wedding and the events following it. It was guilt. Myka had seen it enough times to know what it looked like by now.
"Did she always know?" The whisper is laced with a thick coat of caution, already afraid of the answer.
"Myka this is not on her. This is all me"
"Answer the question, Pete" Myka's voice is dangerously low and the then booms into explosion when Pete makes no move to give her what she already knows. "Answer the damn question, Pete!"
Pete gulps not wanting to subject Helena to the receiving end of that wrath. "She knows nothing."
"You're a lousy liar."
Myka storms off unsure if the tears running down her cheeks are from sheer rage or fear. She cannot understand how Pete could do something so stupid, how he could give her no chance at an opinion on the matter. But now that the oscillator is out question Myka is also afraid of the only other route left, because all this talk of hope and life has stripped her of her former bravado in the face of death.
Myka walks out into the backyard, pulls out her cell phone and dials her wife. When it goes to voicemail she decides to unload her fury there. "Helena you need to call me back the second you get this. You knew? You goddam knew it would kill Pete and you were going to let me do it? What were you thinking?" She yells for a good long while before the beep cuts her off.
Myka sighs.
Everything feels so wrong and she feels so tired. When she looks at the B&B she can't help but remember all the great things that she's seen and done, everything that she has been a part of and to think it's all over already. She runs her hand through her short messy curls, she can't quite remember the last time she actually brushed them. Maybe there is a bright side to loping off most your hair.
She smiles.
When she feels faint she settles down onto the grass not bothered by how it will ruin her white shirt and khaki pants. The grass tingles and pinches her through the thin layer of clothing and leaves most of it damp with dew. Myka pulls out her phone again and calls Helena, only to once again find her voicemail. "Look what you did is horrible, but I'm tired Helena." Myka pauses afraid that another word will cause her to break down, but when the tears roll down anyway she continues.
"This is your fault. You made me hope, you made me want more. I was happy to just die in your arms surrounded by everyone I love most and now I'm mad at Pete but at the same time can't actually be mad at him because he was willing to die for me. My parents are more confused than ever. And I'm alone here with my wife thousands of miles away. And I'm scared. I want the house and the backyard and the screaming kids. And I'm scared because I won't get that. Don't let me die alone, hon. Come home soon okay, I love you. But this doesn't mean our talk is over. I miss you."
Myka likes that it is so cool out here so she lets herself be carried off into sleep.
Pete, on the other hand, has to face his very annoyed and outraged mother who is still pacing the living room unable to understand how Pete forgot everyone he would be leaving behind.
Pete keeps repeating his apologies and trying to make her understand that there is very little in this world that he would not do for Myka Bearing. When that doesn't work he resorts to yelling back.
"Look it's done, okay. There is no way she's going to go for it now. It done, mom. I'm going to lose my partner." he whispers the last part to himself making his way upstairs. He has learnt to give Myka time alone through a lot of experience, so he plans on checking in on her in the morning.
Pete sleeps restless and uneasy and come daybreak he heads straight for Myka's room. He isn't sure what the protocol is for these kinds of situations, but an apology seems like the safest bet.
"Myka, you up?" He knocks on her door. "Mykes, I'm sorry okay. Look I was doing what I had to. Myka? Hey are you in there?" When no one replies, he turns the knob to find an empty room and a bed that hasn't been slept in.
Pete heads downstairs to see if she might have fallen asleep on the couch. "Myka?" After he searches the whole place he goes out to check her car. "Myka where the hell are you?" He whispers under his breath turning away from his partner's SUV.
It is only when he goes out to the backyard that he finds her asleep on the ground. "Myka, what are you doing there, that place is filthy. You that eager to be put in the ground? Mykes?" He nudges her with his foot when that doesn't wake her Pete crouches down besides her. He can feel his pulse quicken. "Myka, please-" he puts two fingers to search for a pulse, a habit both he and Helena have formed over the last couple of months. Pete gulps and starts performing CPR knowing full well the cold that has crept into her skin isn't the early morning air. "Help!" He yells to wake up anyone in the house. "Myka, no. Please, no, please" he repeats over and over pressing down on her chest.
Artie comes panting followed by Mrs. Fredrick.
"Artie, call an ambulance." When Artie makes no move Pete turns to Irene. "Mrs. F? Please. We can't let her die. She can't die"
Artie crouches down besides Pete and Mrs. Fredrick turns away to make the necessary calls.
"Pete you can let go. It's okay." Artie takes Pete's hands away from the body. "Pete, let go." He pulls Pete away and covers the body with the robe he is wearing over his pajamas.
"Someone should call Helena." Pete whispers turning away from the woman on the ground. Artie nods.
He calls Claudia on the Farnsworth.
"We snagged it, on our way back now" Claudia pauses when she notices the grim line etched onto his forehead.
"Claudia can I talk to Helena alone"
"Is everything okay?"
Artie shakes his head and Claudia hands it over.
"Artie" The thick British voice is laced with caution.
"Get here as soon as you can."
"Where is Myka?" Helena does not let her voice break. "Artie? Where is my wife?"
Artie tilts his head to a side trying to keep his tears at bay. "Myka is dead, Helena. I am sorry."
Helena looks down at the phone in her hand. She raises it up and opens her mouth but no words come out. She had just heard the voice mails and she was sure it would not be the last time.
The raven haired time traveler looks up at Steve and Claudia. "Myka is dead. My wife is dead." Helena is not sure if she will ever be able to forgive herself for letting Myka die alone.
So that is all. It has been great writing for all of you. You've been an awesome audience. Thanks for dealing with my annoying updating habits and sometimes draggy and twisty plotlines. Also, thanks a bunch for reviewing and continuing to read right to the very end :* This is my longest piece of work to date, so hopefully I'll be able to turn my attention back to some of my other works. Okay, then. Goodbye!