Chase Manor, Cordelia's Bedroom

Her breathing was almost inaudible, eyes were closed and her face lacked everything that made her who she was. 'It is like I'm watching a mask, a hollow shell that is waiting for her mistress to return. To be filled with energy, wants and needs, pride and compassion, fire and color... What about love? How much love is in there? Love for ones self, love for .. another. She has done so many amazing things already. Selfless and wondrous deeds that make everything I have done in my life pale in comparison and I'm the slayer. I have abilities past that of any human and yet .. she surpasses me in everything that matters.'

Buffy's hand moved and fingers uncurled, eager to touch .. her, it didn't matter where. A lock of hair, a soft cheek, her graceful neck, anywhere as long it was part of that being that filled the mask. A fingertip almost made contact but dreaded the possibility of waking her and at the same time that's everything she wanted. To have her here, to see eyes flutter open and sparkle at the sight of the one who turned her live around so much.

Tears flowed down a longing face before breaking free.. falling.

"B-Buffy? Hey.. sweetie what's wrong?" Cordelia woke, startled by something and the first thing she saw when she opened her eyes was Buffy staring at her with such an intense look that it made her worry.

"Don't talk.. don't say anything nice..to me." Buffy croaked, her voice thick with emotion. "It's too much as it is." Cordelia could only nod, not sure what was going on but realizing it was very important. A finger made contact and more followed suit, they caressed her cheek so softly, so heartbreakingly slow that she almost didn't hear the words coming out of the mouth that was so close to hers. "You mean so much to me Cordy.. " Eyes bored into her. "It hurts, do you know that? Y-you know so much about me.. but do you know how much it hurts?"

"Buffy.."

Upper Floor, Guest Room

Willow mumbled something as she started to wake up but Tara could not make out what it was. Then again Tara could not make out much at all, she had spent the night in a meditative state watching over the redhead and it was taking its toll.

"Oh.. good morning Tara, what spell are you working on?" Willow asked as she looked down to the mattress next to the bed where Tara sat.

"I'm not working on a spell, I was watching for something .. something that just happened." Letting out a long breath Tara started to loosen her muscles and slowly get up. "You want to guess what it is?"

"That sounded way to ominous and deep for this early in the morning, how about I try to find an answer after some coffee?" She smiled at the blond but was taken aback a bit when she was confronted with a way to somber face. "Umm .. or .. not."

Tara shook her head and started to stretch her body a bit. "Nevermind. Coffee sounds very good, I just need a minute to get this body working again." Willow nodded and got up. "You think they are awake already?"

"I know they are."

"Oh .. uh .. how?" Willow asked, curious how the blond could know.

"I felt something coming from the direction of their room, it was pretty intense so most likely not a dream."

"Felt? Huh? What kind of spell did you.."

"N-no spell Willow! Ugh.. " Tara glared at her. "I was not preparing a spell when I sat on the mattress and I did not cast a spell to spy on them!" She grabbed her things and stormed out the door.

"O..k... someone's grumpy in the morning." Willow mumbled, not really sure what this whole thing had been about.

The Kitchen

"So I take it she didn't destroy half the mansion while we were asleep?" Buffy asked as she poured herself a coffee. Tara shook her head and yawned. "Nope, b-but it's good I kept watch, p-pretty much the first words out of her mouth when she got up were about spells this spells that." Cordelia walked up behind Buffy and draped her arms across the slayer before joining in on the conversation. "So what's the plan? You don't look like you can keep this up for long. We could watch her for a bit while you take a nap, if she does anything .. well .. magical we wake you up." Buffy nodded and leaned further back into Cordy's embrace.

"Y-yes that sounds good. Oh .. I-i .. umm kinda told Willow about you guys yesterday.. sorry." Tara ducked her head as she looked over at them. "I wasn't sure if it's really my place to s-say something but it kinda slipped out.. b-but from the looks of it she w-would have noticed soon anyway eh?" She pointed towards them with a teaspoon.

Buffy was about to move out of the embrace, shocked by the fact that Tara knew, but Cordelia held firm.

"She would have noticed what?" Willow asked with a yawn as she entered the kitchen. Buffy's eyes went wide but Cordelia did not budge, muscles tightened ready to break the hold in an instant but.. nothing happened.

"Us." Buffy said with a small voice.

"Huh? Ugh I'm really not getting a break this morning huh? First cryptic Tara and now one syllable Buffy. Sorry guys I'm not much help in this shape." She beelined for the coffee machine.

Tara's left eye began to twitch. "I better take that nap or I might strangle someone." She mumbled and walked off.

"Did she tell you guys anything about this morning? She got upset with me for something."

"Willow?"

"Yes?"

"Willow.."

"Yes?! Buffy what.." She turned around with an angry expression that fled her the moment she saw .. them. "Oh.."

"That is what you would have noticed anyway." Buffy said as she watched her friend drop two cubes of sugar on the counter next to her mug.

"Oh.. that's nice. I-i mean good, very good! F-for you! Yes, very good for you.. you t-two." She stared at Cordelia's arms.. around Buffy.

"Don't forget to breath Willow." Buffy tried lightly, not sure how her friend was going to handle this but from the sheepish look the redhead shot at her a second later it seemed to be alright.

"Yeah.. I heard that's good when it comes to the whole being alive thing and all. S-so yeah, wow you two.. I-i guess I should have know with the whole Daria thing."

Buffy squeezed Cordelia's arm gently and disentangled herself from the brunette. "Yes she .. did not take it so well. How about you? I mean past the shock and all, are you ok?"

"Yeah don't.. don't worry about it! I-i mean it's not like I'm in any position to judge anyone right? N-not that there is anything to judge about! Really.. I.. I'll just .. shut up now." She hung her head and Buffy came over to put her hand over Willows to calm her down. Buffy was about to say something but the moment her fingers touched Willows the redhead coiled her hand back as if stung. "Sorry!" Willow immediately tried to defend her action but the damage was done and she didn't know what she should say to fix the situation.

"Me too." Buffy mumbled and backed away from her again. "Hey Cordy, lets check if Tara is alright ok?" She quickly took Cordelia's hand and left the room with her. "Sure sweetie."

They walked in silence down the corridors, a thumb drew calming patterns over Buffy's hand and as she realized what Cordelia was doing she smiled up at her. "You are the best girlfriend ever you know that? O-or friend, or well .. whatever you are." Buffy felt stupid for bringing up that topic again this early.

"Girlfriend sounds nice." She replied "Wouldn't want you to go around introducing me as 'friend or whatever'."

Buffy's smile widened and she felt tears welling up again. 'I'm such a mess lately, but at least now they are tears of joy.' They were about to head up the stairs to the second floor when a voice echoed through their minds.

"Buffy! Wait!"

Startled Buffy looked around in confusion and saw that Cordelia was doing the same. "Did you.. hear that too?" She nodded and turned back towards the corridor they came from. "And I guess she did it." Willow came running at them, tears streaming down her face.

"Willow, sleep." Came a tired, grumbling voice from the second-floor railing. The redhead instantly fell to the ground and Tara mumbled something before heading back to the bedroom.

"Neat trick." Cordelia commented but Buffy shot an angry look at her.

"She might be hurt!" She hurried over and picked the limp witch up in her arms. "Looks like she is ok. Was that the failsafe Tara was talking about? But she wasn't doing anything wrong!"

"Well instead of simply catching up with us or yelling something she .. invaded all our brains.. so uh.. I think that qualifies as a naughty act in Tara's book." Cordelia said with a shrug. Buffy started protesting and defended the redhead but Cordelia lifted her arms in mock surrender. "You should really take this up with Tara. Well maybe not now or she puts you to sleep too." Cordy added with a grin, earning yet another glare.

"Why do you care anyway, you remember what she did don't you? And I don't mean the thing in the library either, more like the other thing just 2 minutes ago." She crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"Well.. yeah .. but she was just confused is all, didn't you hear her voice? She was in pain, she was sorry, I felt it!"

"She can be sorry all she wants, I'll send Maria to buy me a tranquilizer gun next time she is out shopping." Cordelia grumbled before looking over to the slayer with an apologetic smile. "Sorry.. it's just that .. she keeps messing up and you give her way too much credit. I don't want you to get hurt ok?"

"Like me." Buffy mumbled quietly.

"Huh? What did you say?"

"Nothing, let me take care of Willow, I'll bring her to your room and have a talk with her in private. I don't want to ruin our friendship just because of a misunderstanding ok?"

Cordelia nodded and touched Buffy's arm before walking off. Buffy sighed and looked down at the redhead in her arms. 'You are just like me Willow, we both keep messing up no matter how hard we try or how good our intentions are. But I won't let that ruin our friendship.'

Buffy slowly made her way up the stairs, careful not to let anything hit Willow when she noticed that the redhead was not as limp as she was supposed to be in this state. So she stopped and looked at her face. One eye opened only a fraction just to be closed again instantly and Buffy started to grumble.

"I can explain?" Willow said with a sheepish smile but Buffy was already about to put her down. "No!" The slayer hesitated. "Please Buffy, c-could you .. just a bit longer." She shrugged and lifted the redhead back into her old position. "So I take it you don't really have a problem with me touching you now that you .. know. Why did you act like that in the kitchen?"

"I-i kinda panicked, hence all the babbling. Cordelia staring at me did not help either. So I guess I was .. just .. you know making sure she would not get jealous or something."

"Wow.. that has to be the lamest excuse you ever came up with Will." Buffy smirked. "And we all remember the milk incident from a few weeks back huh?"

The redhead blushed and buried her head deeper into Buffy shirt. "Umm.. yeah."

"Well here we are." They stood before Cordy's bedroom door and Buffy let Willow's legs slide down the floor. "Um Will I think your upper body was supposed to detach along with your legs." But the redhead kept clinging to Buffy.

The reply came a few seconds later and not in the form the slayer had suspected. She felt.. something happening, in her mind, like before when Willow spoke to them, but this was different. "Will?"

She saw a smile appear in front of her, a sad smile, Willows smile, freckles and everything, floating in front of her in stark contrast towards the void of black that now surrounded them. "Yes." Answered the smile. "This is me, all of me." Green eyes gleamed and waves of red hair frame the face. "I'm sorry.. I'm always so sorry.." Emotions whirled around the floating face towards Buffy and the slayer knew. She knew about the reasons for Willow's spells, she knew about the awkward tension between them that came up now and then, she knew .."

"This is too much! Willow? Why are you doing this to me? Why are you showing me?" Buffy had sunk to her knees, overwhelmed by this flood of information and raw emotions.

The face looked down at her with a sorrowful mourn. "Because it no longer matters, I have waited too long, done too much wrong, they will kill me you know? I'm already leashed, soon to be caged again and once they realize I will not change back they will kill me.. He will have to kill me. The council will agree, Tara will keep me bound and he will find a way to end me."

"No!" Buffy yelled into the darkness. "No Willow! They would never do something like that, you are no demon, you are human! Yes you may have done some .. questionable things but it's alright! I forgive you for that, they will not harm you for that."

"Oh Buffy.." The face sighed and the slayer could feel it, the warmth of Willow radiating towards her. The deep yearning for friendship, for contact, for more.. "You are the best thing that ever happened to me Buffy, everything I'm becoming is because of you, because you showed me who I could be, that it is ok to be different."

'Just like Cordy.' Buffy thought for a moment and the face in front of her fractured, only to form something else instead. It was Buffy holding Cordelia tightly around the arms, but it was not really Buffy, it was a horned beast of rage.

SNAP and the image shattered again.

"I am sorry Buffy.. always sorry.. I did not mean to show you that." The face said as it gave itself form again. "But yes I know about it, about that room, that day, of what you did and I am here, just like you. Both struggling for control of themselves against something powerful, something deadly and yet beautiful, something dark."

Twin green globes focused her, staring with an intensity that defied reason. "I know who I am now and this power in me will not control that! I will tame it, make it mine and use it for good. To fight beside you, to help you in your struggle against the beast in you. Together we can achieve anything Buffy!"

The darkness shifted and the face with it. "She is coming! Please Buffy don't let them kill me! I know who i am! And now you know too, make them believe, pleease! I am so sorry.."

Light flooded the darkness and something screamed.