We'll Meet Again Chapter 7

Then…

He just continued to stare up at her, eyes glittering with anger…

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"You weren't there. You didn't care enough, why would you care now?"

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"Dean, what's going on here?" Jay whispered as she threw him an anxious look.

"I'm not sure," Dean replied honestly. "But I'm willing to bet it has something to do with whatever happened on that stairwell, and what happened here before Sam woke up."

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"Sam, I had to watch you die. Again!" ….

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"…I'm not the one you want…

"…please, don't…"

Dean fired but the spirit had already given Sam a shove filled with superhuman strength, and now he was falling back over the railings….

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Whether it was the conversation that roused him or Jay's loud abrupt laughter, no one knew. But a soft voice from the bed drew their attention.

"Sweet and innocent my ass!"

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Now…

"Sweet and innocent my ass."

Sam opened his eyes to be met with two pairs of worry filled green ones.

And he was pretty sure he wasn't seeing double, which would make a change from his last conscious memory.

"Hey," he croaked.

"Sammy? You ok?" Dean's hand still had Sam's in a tight grip.

Sam nodded tiredly. "Feel like I've been asleep for a month," swallowing thickly he added "so why do I still feel so tired?"

Dean squeezed his hand briefly before letting go and sitting back. "You just came outta major surgery little bro. Ya still getting' over the anesthetic."

The casual tone was a huge lie, Sam could see that. His brother had been worried as hell and judging by the look in Dean's eyes he still was.

Sam was having a hard time remembering what had put that worry there, when his ears caught up with him.

"Surgery?" His brow furrowed in confusion.

Dean tried yet again to cover his concern, because if Sam couldn't remember what happened to him then they could have a real problem on their hands. He felt Jay's questioning gaze on him. They hadn't got as far as discussing the extent of Sam's injuries, so this was going to come as a bit of a shock to both Sam and Jay.

"Yeah. Do you remember the hunt?" Dean asked, keeping his voice low and calm for his brother's sake.

Sam stared at him, his eyes blank. "I…ah…" then recent events caught up and slammed into him; he flinched. "Yeah I remember," He whispered, "The squash court killings. We were checking for EMF readings…."

Jay and Dean watched Sam worriedly as his breathing quickened.

"Sam?..."

Flash back after flash back assaulted him, and each time he flinched again, unable to control his breathing. He felt like he was going to pass out….

…you took her from me…

…I'm here to help you…

…she died because of you…

…I'm not the one you want…

…she wasn't there. She didn't care enough, why should she care now?...

…please, don't…

And then he was falling.

Dean leaned forward gently grasping Sam by the shoulders, trying to ground him in some way.

He tried to stop…pain shot through his stomach…

"Sam. Sam!" Sam was startled out of his thoughts. He blinked and glanced wildly around him as if wondering where he was.

Dean was concerned that his breathing was still way too fast. "Sammy calm down, you're safe here, ok?" Though Dean wasn't entirely sure how true that was.

Jay had remained quiet until now, trying to gage Sam's emotional state. At a guess it was making him suffer. But now she leaned over him and touched a hand to the back of his neck, gently stroking his soft locks. The muscles in his neck were so tense they had to be painful, so she gently massaged and kneaded until she felt him gradually relax.

Jay was relieved when he cast a grateful smile her way.

Shifting subtly she covered up her bruised wrist. Sam didn't need that crap right now.

"Do you remember anything else?" she asked softly.

Sam skipped over the flash backs, not understanding them enough to explain.

"Falling." He swallowed hard and Dean had a hard time staying in control at the fear in Sam's voice. "I was falling, and then…there was a sharp pain across my stomach. Last thing I remember was Dean yelling at me to stay awake." He glanced at Dean. "I tried, but the pain…it was just too much."

"Yeah." Dean scrubbed a hand over his face tiredly. "You hit the next set of railings on your way down. When the ambulance arrived you were barely breathing, and after we got to the hospital they took you for scans and all kinds of tests."

Dean had been scared as hell, pacing the waiting room for what seemed like hours when he finally remembered to call Jay. It was around that point the doctor had appeared and announced that Sam had been rushed straight into emergency surgery. Dean hadn't even been given the chance to see him. So he'd started pacing again, wearing a groove in the tiled floor.

"They told me that though you were lucky to escape a serious head and back injury, you'd developed an abdominal bleed, quite a severe one. Severe enough to cause your blood pressure to bottom out from blood-loss. They threw all kindsa medical jargon at me, most of which I didn't get, but I understood enough to know the upshot of it was you were gonna die if they didn't operate immediately."

Dean closed his eyes for a second. Just thinking about it had him feeling nauseous, let alone talking about it. The dread came back to haunt him as did the thoughts that had gushed through his mind during his long stint in the waiting room:

Sam was dying.

It kept running through his head like an echo round a canyon wall.

Sam was dying...

When Dean's eyes opened again Sam could see the barely restrained anger reflected back at him, and knew it was the after effects of stark fear. And he knew it was his fault.

Sam didn't know what to say to make it all better.

He just about remembered the argument before…it all happened, and the guilt he felt became a physical pain in his already sore stomach.

"Dean…"

"Just drop it Sam." Dean's words were harsh but spoken softly, comfortingly. Pinching the bridge of his nose and hanging his head a little, he dreaded what Sam was about to say next and wanted to put a stop to it. "It doesn't matter now little bro. You're alive and that's what counts. We can talk the rest to death another time."

Sam knew differently, and he understood Dean's anger. He'd pushed his older brother into a corner, and carried on pushing until Dean had snapped. And still Sam hadn't let it go. He knew Dean was quite justified in his anger.

Sam still didn't know what to say to make it all better.

So he said it anyway.

"I'm sorry."

Dean's head shot up and fixed him with a confused glare. "What?"

Sam glanced at Jay, who nodded in understanding, kissed him tenderly on the lips, and got up and left, quietly closing the door behind her.

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Jay smiled sadly to herself as she strolled out to the car park, breathing in the crisp mid-morning air and took a look at her watch.

Was it that time already?

Most women would have objected to being kicked out by their boyfriend, but not Jay. Not when it came to Sam and Dean.

Besides, she already guessed the conversation that was about to take place, and understood that they needed each other right now.

Jay was there to help them, not drive them apart, so she never complained, never felt angry when the brothers needed some time alone.

And if occasionally she felt a little jealous, a little bit left out in the cold, Jay just reminded herself that it was no more than she deserved.

After all, it was her fault they had come to this country and been nearly killed several times.

And now they were trapped here, far from home because the FBI had figured out the Winchesters were no longer on their own turf.

Bobby was working hard trying to find a way to bring them safely back to the US without alerting the feds. But it was taking too long, and it was only a matter of time before the American government figured out not only where the boys were, but also who'd been hiding them. They'd taken on her family name during their stay as a cover, and that meant that not only the Americans but also her own government would come down on her like a ton of bricks, once the alarm was raised.

She wasn't afraid for herself.

But the boys would have trouble. They were tall, handsome and striking; you couldn't miss them even in a crowded place.

No. She had other ideas for Sam and Dean. She knew exactly where they could go after this hunt was finished, and it would take them off the prospective radar screens for quite some while. Her cousin had called her a few nights ago, asking for help. And it was a perfect hiding place for the boys.

No one would think of looking there. She just had to convince them and Jay was pretty good at doing that.

There was one thing that bothered her.

There was a good chance that she'd never see either of them again.

And that hurt.

Jay would need to pack up and disappear; it would be easy enough for a woman traveling alone to evade capture, especially with the kind of contacts she had access to.

She would just have to learn to start again.

Without Sam.

After all, she'd done it before!

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Dean stared at Sam hoping his little brother would drop his gaze and leave it at that.

But after Jay had respectfully left the room, Dean found that this time he couldn't allow it.

"Sam?"

Taking a shuddering breath Sam spoke. "I should've just let it go. I know what you were trying to do. After what happened at Cold Oak, and at Colchester, I shouldn't have goaded you. You were just trying to look out for me, your stubborn, spoilt, pain-in-the-ass little brother.

And I'm sorry Dean, I never meant to cause you so much pain…"

Not able to take hearing this anymore, Dean erupted angrily. "Sam just stop!"

And immediately regretted his tone as his little brother flinched. He didn't want to look at Sam right now, didn't want to see the fear and pain in his eyes, but least of all the unwarranted guilt.

So he got up and turned away, appearing to study some medical poster about asthma.

They were both silent for a few uncomfortable minutes, but Dean could hear Sam shifting uncomfortably on the bed. Worried that his brother was in pain he cast a sneak side-long look at him, and realising that he was just fretting a little he kept his back turned.

Eventually he spoke, his voice low.

"It wasn't your fault, so don't ever think it was. You hear me Sammy? It wasn't your fault."

"But.."

Dean spun around. "No. I don't wanna hear any 'buts' or 'what ifs' or any of that shit, ok? Now you listen to me." He stalked back to Sam and leaned into his little brother's face, hands grasping at Sam's arms. "I took the ground floor without thinking. I sent you up that damn stairwell without thinking. I should have known what could happen, but I wasn't thinking!" He hung his head. "This was my fault Sammy. Not yours."

He took a deep breath, and raised his head.

"And now what ever did this to you….its followed you here."

Sam stared at him, eyes wide.

There was another long silence before Sam asked

"What?!"

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Author's Notes:

Yeah. I can just imagine what you're thinking. A lot of brotherly crap so early on, but then given what's happened I figured that the boys wouldn't want the sun to go down on another argument. Especially as Sam isn't fully out of the woods yet and doesn't really remember what happened to him.

I have an idea of what could transpire, but I would appreciate some private messages if anyone has any suggestions. 'Cos I must admit, the writers block is still having a barny with me over this one.

I think I'm too distracted by another possible story buzzing round my head.

Let me know what ya think. Love all who read, love even more those who review.

Kind regards,

ST.xxx.