Long. I may not be updating until the end of next week, Friday. I'm gonna be having GEE
(graduation exit exams) and I'm like freaking out. I have to pass the math and English, and I
could possibly pass the English-its just the math. Wish me luck folks, wish me luck!! here is chapter 9.
after this i will be working on scarred so be on the lookout!
She pulled a cigarette out of her dresser, and sat on her bed in silence. Grabbing a nearby lighter, she took a nice puff of her cigarette. Her expression blank and dark, there wasn't much for her to say. After Cindy and Caesar left, she just sat there. The whole house feeling larger than it really was. Her body having this sick vibration and she barely able to keep composure.
It only got worst when he arrived.
Huey Freeman brought in a smell of fine body wash. Obviously coming home from his training session at the dojo, he dropped his duffel bag by the door. His white muscle shirt flew over head, and he sat himself on the couch right beside the chair she was sitting in.
"Its late," she informed him, "eight o'clock to be precise".
"You can act that way with Riley, not with me".
"What way, what are you talking about Mr. Freeman".
Mr. Freeman. Never had she called Riley or Robert that, only him. A title that was given to him in fifth grade after reciting a report on what he wanted to be when he became an adult.
"A revolutionist," their fifth grade Social Studies teacher said, "what an...interesting role".
An eleven year old Huey Freeman stood in front of his fifth grade class. Why did he have high expectations for his peers? Why did he expect them to understand the meaning of his revolution; why couldn't they see the dim future that they were heading towards?
For the worst part, Michael Caesar didn't take this class with him. Caesar was his only escape to the idiocy and ignorance that stemmed from this room. To his chagrin, he was stuck with Jazmine. Honestly, she wasn't the most "helpful" sponsor in the room. Bored, uninterested faces tore at him with such high velocity, it made him want to hit someone.
"Thank you for your time".
"Yay Huey"!! Jazmine cheered him, "Wow, that was great".
As he walked back to his desk, his frown evident, he turned to the mulatto girl who sat in the front seat. "Jazmine, did you even understand all that"?
She pouted a bit, "No, but the way you said it was cool".
"..." "Whatever Jazmine".
"My," Mr. Lewis said in a bored tone, "look Huey there is one actual question wanting to be answered".
Like the others, she had a bored face as well. Her hand playing as her rest stool for her head, she stared at him blankly. "If you do achieve the goal of becoming a revolutionist, how will you make them listen"?
"The point that you are trying to make is unclear".
Her voice became harder, "Dr. King, Malcolm X they both had different views on how to reach the people, you are aware of that, aren't you"?
"Yes". "Dr. King had a peaceful approach than Malcolm X, he was more-liberal".
She nodded, "Malcolm X was liberal, when he received death threats did you know what he did, to save time I'll tell you". "In a photograph taken in 1964, it shown Malcolm X holding a M1 carbine in defense, peering out of the window".
"My point Mr. Freeman is this-what approach are you willing to take"? "Will it be uniting, or fighting, or will it be the legend of Huey Percy Newton"?
"Are you done"?
"Not quite, I am aware of your namesake-he did things for the African-American race, but sometimes they were not the most ideal ones". "I am positive that you understand the significance that I am trying to make should be quite clear, what are you going to do when no one is willing to listen"?
Huey stared at her with less emotion than he usually did. It had been a whole year, a year since she had moved to Woodcrest. A year of putting up with her coldness, sarcasm, and regular beatings towards Riley, he thought he had enough. He saw her as another girl, another girl that didn't understand his vision.
His thoughts about her were utterly deferred.
Previously, she was sitting in her chair with unexplained tedium. Now, she was up, her hands crossed on her desk, staring at him. He stared back, and it became very uncomfortable in the classroom.
"Tell me Mr. Freeman, will you be a King, a Little, or a Newton-talk to me".
In Woodcrest, there weren't many girls like her. Still ain't.
Huey. Huey Percy Freeman. Gwendolyn. Gwendolyn Rosetta Kaji. Two 11 year olds, both with high intelligence.
The funny thing about it: Huey had finally realized it.
"When that time comes," he said with definite confidence, "I will do what I have to do to make my voice heard".
A small smirk appeared on her face, "Fine, Mr. Freeman, and I am waiting for that day".
Seven years ago. Huey had realized his ultimate mistake that day, don't underestimate a Slaughter. Not a Kaji, a Slaughter, her mother's maiden name. The relationship that had formed between them was mainly and probably built on respect. The respect he had for her as a woman, and the same respect she had for him as a man.
"I can't worry for your well being," she said in a mockingly tone, "Mr. Freeman"?
The way she said it, so teasingly. It was almost cruel. He glared at her, as she playfully glared back.
"Do you always have to act this way," he said in a hoarse voice.
"Only when you're hear Mr. Freeman".
"Its not funny".
"Did I say that it was suppose to be fun," she chuckled, "I guess fun on my part, right"?
He rolled his eyes in slight annoyance. "Yes, now you're being really sadistic right now". He took a small glance at her. Her eyes were glued on the black television. He sighed, why did he have to put up with this? Not the fact that Gwen was probably off in her own little corrupted world, the fact that he was...
How could he execute his words?
Put them into meaning?
Ah...these strange, desirable feelings for Gwendolyn. Feelings that had swelled up since meeting her, since that eventful day in fifth grade, he felt surreal. Unlike his Jazmine, in which his feelings for her were dimming down, he had to think. He had to be cautious around her, careful of every word that exited his mouth.
Tactful.
Yes, using tact in her case. To make himself sound more refined, to prevent him getting a beating like his younger brother. And yet, he yearned for it. The beating. Soft, tender hands plummeting into the ground beneath him. Lifting him by his collar, throwing him at least three feet away.
You could most likely call him a masochist.
A masochist who only liked being brought down by one female.
Jazmine. Think of her only.
It was times like these that she really wished not to be alive. He and she both in a room alone, it made her feel...sick. Not the sickly sick, that I have a cold sick. No, it was more "mental". A perfect word, mental, she felt sick being alone with him. She couldn't even recall how long it had been since...ever.
To explain this: The conversations that they would have with each other were more cold than now. They could be in the same room with each other, and she could randomly pop in with only a bath towel on. At first appearance a person would get the impression that she was putting the moves on him, but it was different matter.
She enjoyed seeing him sweat.
Gwen had learned throughout her life, because of her mother, to sense and feel the muscles move. When anxious the muscles come close together, the heartbeat racing higher than usual, a thrill to her indeed. How she loved feeling those muscles tense, his heart rate racing. Then there were other times that she wished...
that she could do more.
Is that wrong? Yes it was. Thinking that way, when he was truly in love with his girlfriend. If she wanted him so badly, why did she pushed Jazmine to him? Why did she tell Jazmine say how she truly felt, why in the name of mankind would she do that? She could have told Huey, but would she say-how would she be able to describe it? This only made her sicker.
She wanted to do more.
This revelation, it frightened her.
Denial was so good to her, so precious.
"Gwen," his voice calling out to her, "is something wrong"?
"..."
"You're not saying anything, so I'm assuming that something is wrong".
"When you assume," she said coolly, "you make an ass out of me and you". To dear God that she prayed that he didn't hear that. Not the comment, she loves the comment, the tone of voice. Huey's eyes pierced at her, even with her not looking at him. She breathed steady, her throat becoming dry. He did noticed it, he noticed it indeed.
Her voice cracked. For the tiniest moment, it cracked. Whenever a person who has a personality like Gwen's seems to be in distress, that was bad. In a more stern tone.
"Gwen is something wrong"? She flinched a bit in her seat.
"No".
His eyes narrowed dangerously, "Are you keeping something from me, Gwendolyn"?
Damn was he persistent. Her face scrunched up in frustration, he didn't see that though. "No Huey Percy, I'm not keeping anything from you Huey". Her voice casual and collective. Depending on whose looking, this could be a fortunate or a unfortunate thing. Because Huey didn't believe any of it.
"You are truly a terrible liar sometimes". He was still sitting on the far left of the couch, but to Gwen it felt that he was right behind her. Clutching his strong arms around her neck, killing her with tools that he was probably unaware that he even had in his possession.
"Is that true," she clicked her tongue, "please explain-Mr. Freeman".
"Explaining is unnecessary in your case when you are fully aware of the situation at hand".
"Is that so"?
"Yes".
Tension. It was beginning to raise at a very immoderate level now, Huey losing his patience at an excellent speed. Gwen felt the tension, it hitting her with powerful force that could have knocked her out of the chair. Thank goodness for gravity.
"Gwendolyn," the annoyance and frustration evident now, "what are you hiding"?
"Is something wrong with you, did anything go down"?
Her hands clenched the arms of the chair, her lips shutting tightly. In all her life, in all the time knowing him, had he gotten so protective? It made her feel something, unknown to her, a good thing inside that he was concern. In contrast, it annoyed her as well. Personally, she was never use to having this type of-attention. When a person would worry for her, interrogating her until she revealed some sort of information that they wanted from her.
With Huey, it was information about her that he wanted. And dammit, she wasn't planning to give it up to him.
"Even if I told you," her voice hard as nails, "would it matter, why would you even care"?
"What are you talking about"?
"You shouldn't care in the first place," she turning on the defensive, "keep out of my business".
Before he knew it, before she knew it-Huey was off the couch, grabbing hard onto the Gwen's wrist. She was wearing a dark green jacket, with a black panther design on the back. Her serene features did not show any sign of distress or shock, only blankness. Huey's eyes were flaming with annoyance, anger, and something more.
"Don't you ever say that to me, how could you say that-what gives you the right"? His voice barely above a whisper, and filled with pure rage all the same.
Gwen's voice was equally filled with anger and more, put on the defensive. "Don't you dare give me that bullshit Freeman". "Why act this way to me-why"?
Huey looked act her with uncertainty, not comprehending the question at all. His hand gripping only tighter on her wrist the assurance that he did hear her, and that he did feel all the rage that was exiting her body.
"You're someone I...," he trailed off.
"What Freeman, what"!? Her voice still holding anger and the same time panicky.
"You're someone I, I". Gwen was glaring daggers. Huey was left in a standstill, he didn't know what to do. Her eyes, it frightened him. On specific terms, it was not- "I'm afraid that ya gonna kick my ass wit ya fine ass". It was more "What's wrong with you, tell me please". Her eyes held so much...pain in them not even Huey could take it, he slowly released his grip on her. Her hand fell to her waist, her eyes shifted from his own to the floor beneath them. Silence, true silence filled the house for once.
"You don't know what I am, do you"? She said uncharacteristically softly.
"Gwen, you're-I". He stumbled for the right words, and despite his efforts to search for them he came with nothing.
She chuckled, "Don't act so dumb Freeman, I'm not mad". Her feet stepping away from him, her slender back facing him, her amber eyes turning to him slowly. Those amber eyes, Asian eyes of hers, he got lost in them most of the time. Swirls of golden, an Afro-Asian Goddess standing before him in all of her glory.
"You should," her voice below a whisper, "I'm not nothing to you, not a friend, nothing".
"Gwen, that's not true".
"Yes it is, and even if its not-we can't even define our relationship". She chuckled again, "To be honest I don't wish to, its just there".
"What"?
"Us, we're just there, we've always been this way, and never since we've known each other we were able to say anything more about it". "We were just people who knew each other and had some things in common". "And now, I think, its finally hit home base".
"I don't get it," Huey shook his head, "what are you trying to tell me"?
Since the day that they had officially became a couple, Gwen had rehearsed these words in her head over a thousand times. She wasn't the one to be in a committed relationship, she wasn't the type to be a mother or a wife. Besides, who would want to be with a girl like her? In the end, she'll be what her parents think of her now: A burden.
The potential that Huey contained in himself was no lie, he could change world order, he could. If he had her around all the time, if they would become one, she would end up bothering him in the end. That was the same with Riley too. If she was the cause of any true misfortune in their lives, she wouldn't be able to cope with the guilt. That burden would be harder than the last, and she was unable to let that go.
Had there ever been a time in his life to be real and up front, the time was now. However, he wasn't being up front or real, he just stood there. The brain cells that reportedly worked very well for him seemed to die at that moment. His breathing steady, his eyes dark chocolate eyes linked with her amber ones. All he wanted to do right then was to run up to her and grab her, and just hold her. To tell her that everything was going to be alright.
The silence that filled the house, the true silence was beginning to be irritated. For that same silence that was once covered the home when those two were only there returned only for a brief moment. With her beautiful amber eyes still locked with his own, Huey already knew what she was thinking. For once in his life, did he wish for ignorance. To be unaware of the things and obstacles surrounding him, just once-for once.
"Huey, take care of Jazmine," those amber orbs told him, "I'll go now-bye".
You're not mine Huey, and you will never be mine. You belong to Jazmine, she's right for you, and if you don't see it now, you'll see it soon enough. For the time being, until you see that-I'll back off and be on my own. I can handle that much. I'll be around, not around you though, Riley. Can't be clingy though, because if I do-how will he be able to find the ladies.
I have enough sense in my head to do that. So yeah, I'll be going now, staying in my house and wait for my dreaded parent to come home from wherever they are. If I recall correctly, my father is somewhere in Brazil, and my mother in France. They have the habits of doing that sometimes.
Later, Mr. Freeman.
The door closed gently, her footsteps soon becoming out of earshot. With her presence gone, the life of Huey a portion of it went with it too. His slim figure, it felt heavy and he took a seat in the chair that smelled like her.
What? Dammit, what!? What the hell is suppose to be talking about, she's not making any sense!! I should go after her, try to get things cleared up. No, she brought this upon herself, I shouldn't care-despite the fact, I still do care.
She's hiding something from me, and won't tell. Meinichi can be stubborn as hell at times, and this time is one of them. I don't get it, why can't she just tell me what she meant, how she feels. Eight years, eight long years putting up with her!! Being by her, being something more to her-doesn't that matter to her at all!? Now...now she's going to throw all that away. I just don't understand. Can a person be that cold, that cold.
"What are you willing to do for your voice to be heard"?
Meinichi, what is going through your head. I want to know, and whenever you are willing to let me in-I'll be there.
Please.
That was the conclusion of their disagreement.
Her cigarette had reached the bud, and she put it into the ashtray that sat patiently on the desk that was beside her queen size bed. Her room was particularly decorated with dark colors, chocolate brown and velvet. The sheets were mixed with both, the main sheet chocolate brown and the pillows that went with it velvet. The curtains were velvet as well, and everything else just went along wit the flow. It didn't matter to her if it matched or not, it just didn't.
"Gwendolyn," her mother's voice called out from downstairs, "Momo is here".
An overly excited 12 year old Meinichi ran down the stairs. Her face still held that nonchalant expression, but she ran up to the elderly woman, wrapping her arms around her waist. The old woman smiled down at her. That cold, lovingly smile of hers. How at her age, she was able to contain that type was beyond the knowledge of the smartest scholar.
"Hello Gwen," her voice tender and warm, "how is my baby doing"?
"I'm doing fine," a soft smile appeared, "how are you, where is PawPaw"? She took a few steps to give her great-grandmother some room. Rosetta was an old woman indeed, 85 to be exact. Her once equally dark brown hair was now the color of snow, her walking speed was diminishing at a steady rate, and yet she still had that flow. That flow that made many people intimidated by her.
The only thing that was flawed was her skin. Rosetta was born to a Caucasian/Cherokee woman and pure African-American man in Orange, Texas. So yes, she had incredibly light skin color. As she grew, some of it turned pure white, because of vitiligo that had appeared. She didn't care though, she was in her mid 40s when it appeared.
Her husband Antoine got out of the car, walking slowly to the house, Gwen met up with him first. She hugged him tightly, her face covered in his shirt, breathing in his scent. For some odd reason, she loved how old people smell. They had been through so much through their lives, they just smell so fine and refined, as if you could breathe in their memories.
"Hi Tweety," he said happily, "how you been doing baby"?
"I should be asking you the same question," Gwen said sternly her face still covered, "you shouldn't be visiting me, it should be the other way around". Her grip tightened a bit, her tone of voice going unsteady.
"Oh Tweety," he patted her back lovingly, "we fine baby, we fine".
"I just...". "I just," she looked up at him with water eyes, "I can't, don't".
Gwen clutched the velveteen colored pillow against her chest tightly, breathing ragged. They bought her whatever she needed, whatever she wanted, she was a spoiled little brat. She didn't do anything good for them, and she went to this uppity Woodcrest while they stayed in Southern Louisiana. They had no one else but themselves. Gwen didn't even care of the fact that her great-aunt, Rosetta's second born (she was married before Antoine), lived in Breaux Bridge. Not terribly far from them.
Her body shook uncontrollably, "I didn't, I just couldn't," soft tears hitting the pillow, "I didn't want to imagine a life without you, and at times I just...want to be with you, both you".
"Momo, Paw Paw-please forgive me".
"Riley, this is my stop". She pointed to the house in an annoyed way.
"Sorry," he stepped on the brakes stopping at the good looking house not too far from his own.
The first day of counseling hadn't gone too bad. Even though they had argued most of the time, and Ms. Hernandez just sat and watched-they got a lot of anger out. Being blunt, a good portion of it wasn't directed towards each other.
"Today was fun," Jazmine replied in a sarcastic tone.
"Yeah, we should do it more often".
"Oh we will, 30 more days to be precise," she pulled on a large, fake, toothy smile, "gotta go-bye sweetie"!
"Bye honey suckle"!!
A stupid game that they had to play in counseling. Ms. Hernandez could be down right mean to those kids sometimes. Forcing them to be nice and that playing a game in which saying compliment would be to the highest degree, befitting To make it fun, they decided to spice things up, couple style.
"Honey suckle," Jazmine snickered, "you can do better than that, Freeman".
Riley cocked an eyebrow, she just called him Freeman. "Getting a lil risky eh, honey suckle"?
Jazmine smirked. "Only for my Gangsta Prince," her smooth creamy like hands cup around Riley's face, so warm. To her surprise, Riley's face was very warm as well. Then again, what did she expect with a living, sexy looking, and alive boy would be-freezing.
She blushed snatching her hands away, "Sorry, didn't mean to".
Riley shook his head, "No prob, just gotta think of a name that's gonna fit with Gangsta Prince".
"Don't you dare think I'm going to call you King, because King ain't coming out of this mouth".
"I know that, besides Prince sounds better".
Jazmine sat in Riley's Mercedes Benz for a bit longer, before getting out. Once she got out, it was as if all the wind out of her body was knocked out of her. She breathed in deeply, and smiled at the younger Freeman brother.
"I'll pick ya up tomorrow, okay"?
"Alright," her blush deepening more, "bye Riley".
She walked to her house, the engine of the car coming back to life, and Riley driving away. Shutting the door quietly, she leaned back, letting her body fall slowly to the floor. She should have felt guilty, acting that way with Riley, it could be considered cheating. Knowing this, it didn't matter to her, she was just so damn giddy. Smiling brightly to herself, hugging her knees as she rocked back and forth. Thirty more days of counseling, wonder how that was going to turn out.
"Finally," he breathed out as he took the keys, "home at last".
Counseling wasn't as he expected and that was a good thing, but he was ready to get home and sleep. His cell phone read nine o'clock right on the dot. Maybe Gwen had cooked him something to eat, the bitch could cook!
The house was frigid and still. The television was left on, Granddad hadn't made it home yet, obviously. It was frigid, still, and had a very sickening gut feeling in his insides. An odor that he tried to lock away five years ago, and to his distress it somehow was releashed.
A deep frown killed his once cool look, "Fuck Huey".
I'm not lying to you folks, I didn't mean for it to be so lengthy. I nearly cried on this one, seriously. As you can see-it deals with Gwen's grandparents, based off my own. They passed when I was 9 and it still hurts. I made Gwen 13 when they passed seeing that I just didn't want to take them away so quickly.
Thanks for all the reviews and the support that you guys have given me, I truly do care. You like me, you really like me! I'm so touched. Okay, I know I'm sure that I made some mistakes somewhere in it so if you don't mind-point them out. Thanks guys, much love to you all.
One more thing: Meinichi is Gwen's Japanese given name, I like it. It also has a meaning to it, can ya figure it out. If you do, tell me! Thanks again and have a blessed day.