Our First Time
By: Rise of the Blossom

They hadn't been together all that long.

Sighing, Futaba rested her head in her hands and watched her boyfriend as he spoke on the phone to his older brother. Tanaka–sensei had been away for over a month now and she believed it had only just hit Kou that he was really gone. Well, no longer only a couple of miles away.

No, she and Kou hadn't been together for long, but it felt like there had always been something there between them – and there had been! Just taking a look at their past told you that.

She sighed again, although this time it was with annoyance. Not towards Kou, but towards herself. Lately her thoughts had been more scrambled than usual, especially around Kou. It was like her brain went into overdrive whenever he was around her!

Whenever Kou was around, Futaba had noticed many little and supposedly unimportant things. Things such as how his hair fell into his eyes, how those eyes warmed when he smiled, how that smile could brighten an entire room! When he was around, she found herself feeling incredibly nervous yet happy all at that same time. Futaba never knew what to do with herself. Did she fold her hands respectfully in front of herself, or did she leave them to just hang by her sides? Did she sit properly with a straight back or could she slouch in his presence?

Previously none of that had mattered to her – well, not entirely. In Kou's presence, she was shy and nervous, but her entire body seemed to come alive with anticipation, not allowing her to sit still for long. There was always something to do or something that she had to do.

And Futaba knew that Kou could feel that strange anticipation too, because he was wary of touching her too much. Was that because he didn't enjoy the feeling? Didn't he like touching her? Grumbling under her breath, Futaba continued to watch her boyfriend. Why couldn't he just be more open? Show her how he felt? It would be so much easier than making her guess!

It would be considered improper if anything happened between them and it would also be looked down upon. However… Why did that matter? Sure, she'd been rather reserved with things such as that during their relationship, during their 'friendship' but… The truth was, was that… Well…

"I'm done talking, Futaba–"

"Why don't you want me?"

Her eyes went wide and Futaba quickly covered her mouth in horror. Had she seriously just yelled that at him? If the stunned look on his face meant anything, then yes, yes she had.

"Just kidding!" she added out of reaction.

Only to wince when Kou tapped his hand on the top of her head. "Baka. Do you really think I don't want you?"

It made her ridiculously uncertain when he leaned forward so that his chest was against the back of the chair she was sat on. And like every other time he was so close to her, her body felt like it was ready to snap at any moment, just waiting for that one touch that undid everything.

"Y–You never…" Her words trailed off as she felt his nose nuzzling the side of her neck, her breathing turning shaky. "Um…"

Kou's hand reached up and brushed her hair to the side so that he would have easier access to her neck. "The truth is…" It stunned her when she felt his lips against her neck, moving with his words. "You're all I can think about."

Unpredictable and always stunning her.

"I stay away from you and don't touch you because I don't trust myself around you." he murmured against her soft skin. "Ever since that night when I had you pinned against the grass… Having you is all I can think about."

Pinned against the grass? Memories flashed through her mind, reminding Futaba of what had happened. She'd been following him and eventually they had sat together. He'd been warning her about that side of town, about how dangerous it was, but… It was safe to say that Futaba had had other things on her mind, such as how close they were and how his lips were nearly touching hers and–

She closed her eyes, a blush sweeping over her cheeks.

"I haven't been touching you because I don't want to push you into anything you're not ready for."

Turning around in her seat, she watched as Kou stood to his full height as she also stood. He was still so much taller than her but it no longer bothered her.

"Would it really be pushing if I want you to touch me?" Something flashed in his eyes and not for the first time, Futaba was curious about how his mind worked. "What are you thinking, Kou?"

Shoving the chair that was between them out of the way, he closed the distance, caging Futaba against the table by placing his hands on either side of her. "What am I thinking about?" She nodded shakily. "Things I shouldn't be."

"L–Like?" Her heart was doing that strange thumping thing again, she vaguely realised and it seemed to pulse around her whole body instead of just her chest.

"You," His voice dropped to a whisper as Kou leaned forward, forcing Futaba back until she was laying on the table and he was hovering over her, "spread out on my bed. You…" Despite his words, his hand was hesitant as it was placed on her thigh, noticing the wide look in her eyes. "Naked on my bed, waiting for me." A strange gasping sound left her as he lowered himself onto her, his hand moving to her hip. "I think about being on you… in you." He seemed just as flustered as she was, because his breathing was also shallow, practically panting against her throat. "I think about how you would feel wrapped around me–"

"K–Kou…"

It was with a curse under his breath that he pulled away, seeming to be reluctant to do so. "You asked–"

She shook her head and tangled her fingers into his shirt, stopping his retreat. "I… I want that."

They hadn't been together all that long, but…

But she was ready.

"N–Now?" This time, it was he who stammered.

Futaba nodded and grabbed his hand, holding it between the both of hers. "Now."

Where had her confidence come from? She wasn't even sure. All she knew was that seeing the blush on Kou's cheeks, seeing his composure cracking and revealing his nervousness, excited her. Kou was a laid back guy and even though he had his serious moments, it seemed he had his moments of nervousness also, which she was grateful for.

"N–Not here!" she exclaimed when he moved forward. "I don't want my first time to be on your table, where people eat."

He gave her a smirk and nodded once before tightening his hold on her hand and leading Futaba to his bedroom. And once again, she wished she could read his mind.

Swallowing hard as they entered his bedroom, Futaba glanced around even though she already knew what it looked like and where everything was. She'd been here many times before, after all. However, it had never been with this intention. It had been for innocent studying or simply lounging around as he recovered from that car accident only a couple of months ago.

Remembering the car accident had her heart clenching. The fear she had felt that night after receiving a call from Tanaka–sensei had been petrifying. It terrified her so greatly that Futaba had had difficulty actually entering Kou's hospital room. And then seeing him laying there, awake and already recovering, had overwhelmed her to say the least. She'd been certain that it was bad news and for days and weeks afterwards, Futaba had been expecting something bad to happen, for him to disappear from her life again. Things just never seemed to work out for them, after all.

That was the thought that terrified her the most: Kou leaving. If he left again, it would break her. She loved him too much.

Her body snapped to attention when a large hand cupped her cheek and lifted her face and it was eagerly that Futaba met Kou's lips with her own, trying so very hard to convey her emotions through that single kiss alone. As usual, however, despite feeling something from their kiss, Kou was a mystery to her. There was a strong emotion coming from him but it was one she couldn't describe – and no, it wasn't just because he was turned on.

Her cheeks warmed.

Kou's hand slipped from her face and to her neck, stroking it for a moment before his hand continued downwards, slipping down her arm and taking her hand.

And Futaba's heart melted when he lifted her hand to his lips, kissing each fingertip gently and with such affection that she could have sworn it wasn't actually Kou who was doing such a thing. However, during their relationship, she'd seen a totally new side of Kou and had seen that he could be affectionate. He could be passionate. It all depended on whether or not he wanted you to see that side of him, as very little people had the honour of seeing it.

It was Futaba who guided Kou towards the bed and it was Futaba who lowered him onto it, following closely. She was hesitant when shifting over him, though and it was difficult to disguise her uncertainty.

"Are you changing your mind?" Kou breathed between kisses, his fingers threaded in her hair to bring their lips back together.

"No." she replied in a whisper.

Just a second after the word left her lips, Kou was rolling them over, pressing his body against hers as he continued their kisses.

The attention he gave to her, the way he kissed her and held her, was unlike anything Futaba had ever experienced before. It felt different to their innocent kisses, or holding hands. Okay, it was kind of obvious why it felt different, especially as Kou's hand pressed to her side, his thumb stroking through her shirt, but still. This attention was on a completely different level and it made her feel lightheaded, made her feel weak.

She turned her head to the side to catch her breath, though was unprepared for the kisses that suddenly littered along her jaw and down her neck, starting slowly and unsurely at first, before growing more certain. It brought forth a gasp and her head seemed to move by itself as Futaba tilted it backwards, exposing more of her throat.

"It's not too late…"

"Stop trying…" She gasped as he sucked on her collarbone, completely surprised by the pleasure it brought to her. "Stop trying to change my mind." Futaba eventually managed to whisper. "I want you, Kou."

His lips descended on hers without warning and there wasn't a trace of hesitancy or uncertainty as Kou deepened their kiss, stroking her tongue with his own. The hand that had been holding her waist slipped away, sliding higher and higher beneath her shirt until he was cupping her breast.

And much to her horror, she moaned. It sounded low and quiet, but it was obvious he heard because Kou pulled back ever so slightly, staring down at her with those brown eyes of his. In response to the look in his eyes, a look she couldn't even fully distinguish, a blush rose to her cheeks.

Did he have to look at her like that? So intensely? She was aware of how stupid that moan probably sounded. In television shows or movies, the women always sounded so much better than that, yet she probably sounded like–

His hand gently squeezed her breast, experimentally massaging it.

Another moan, though this one was muffled.

The hand he was using to lean on momentarily slipped between them, grabbing the hand Futaba was using to muffle her moans and not even a moment later, it was pinned above them.

"I want…" Much to her surprise, Kou was blushing. "I want to hear you moan."

The blush on her cheeks deepened.

He smirked and leaned forward, brushing his lips against hers.

It confused Futaba when the hand on her breast disappeared, slipping out from under her shirt, but only a second later did she realise what Kou wanted. His fingers began to pop open the buttons of her shirt, going lower and lower until he was sitting up and pulling Futaba up, also, removing her of the shirt.

The sound of it dropping to the floor sounded so very loud to her, as did the other articles of clothing that soon followed.

However, the further into it that they got, the more Kou touched her and kissed her, the less she thought about it and how she was supposed to act. Instead of focusing on sounding sexy or attractive, Futaba merely followed her body's natural response to his actions. She squirmed beneath him when he kissed her breasts, when his fingers started a gentle rhythm between their bodies beneath the sheets. She moaned whenever he found a specific spot within her, his fingers brushing against it.

It had nothing on the act itself, though.

He trembled above her for a moment, the hand on her hip squeezing tightly as he pressed his body closer to hers, bringing her hips against his. And when they were one, he swallowed hard and paused, breathing harshly against her lips. It didn't bother her. Futaba knew that her breathing was no different and she wondered if she was hurting Kou, since her nails were digging into his back.

She needed something to hold onto, though, especially when his hips moved against hers slowly. And as Kou found a rhythm that suited them both, Futaba found herself pulling him against her, holding his body close to her own as she breathed out a moan into his shoulder.

In response, he shivered against her and turned his head to the side, his lips pressing to her cheek, her forehead, her hair and anywhere else he could reach.

Widening her legs ever so slightly, she slowly and shyly began to move her hips with his, meeting his thrusts.

When she grew old enough to be thinking about things such as this, Futaba had believed she'd be too lost in the moment to think about anything, but she was wrong. So much was going through her mind! How Kou felt moving against her, moving inside of her and the pleasure it gave to her. How his breathless groans and moans, his grunts, made something within her tighten.

It was impossible not to focus on it all.

And when Kou quickened his pace, a thin layer of sweat breaking out across his skin, she knew what was happening, for he moaned her name in such a way that despite her being new at all of this, told her that he was close.

It didn't matter to her as his thrusts faltered, as his hips knocked against hers a final few times before stopping completely, that she hadn't reached orgasm like all the women in romance books or movies usually did. The act itself was enough for her and when Kou collapsed on top of her, trying to catch his breath, she held him close, smiling up at the ceiling as she ran her hand through his hair, the other stroking his slightly sweaty back.

There was a brief moment where he sat up and Futaba turned her eyes away, her cheeks deepening in colour, as he removed the condom, tying it at the end and throwing it in the bin beside his bed, but he was back in her arms just as quickly as he got up.

"Next time will be better." he murmured quietly into her neck.

She smiled once more.

They hadn't been together all that long, but…

She couldn't be happier.