Hey! So, this chapter is all Santana's POV. I know i already put a little bit of her POV in chapter 6, but I really wanted to expand on it. The part in chapter 6 is still fine, but this is just more in depth. It's a bit short, but I wrote it at about 2:30am, so mercy plea :) Ok, so here it is! Sorry it took a bit, but I got it up…. That sounds wrong… but you catch my drift. So, on with the story!
Disclaimer: Yo No own Glee, or any of it's characters… All i own is little Eli… Guess it could be worse..
They were the last group to get to the McKinley gym. Everyone was already gathered inside, laughing and catching up, normal reunion stuff.
Even though she knew he wasn't here yet, her eyes did a quick scan of the whole premisses just to be sure. Well, actually, no one was staring wide eyes and slacked jawed, and there wasn't any fighting, so of course he couldn't be there yet. She breathed a sigh of relief, which wasn't lost of Brittany, who was beside her, looking beyond stunning in her bright pink and blue dress (some things never change, and Brit's style choices were one of those things. Always the bright and happy wardrobe to compliment her bright and bubbly personality), clasping her hand tightly. Girl was like a damn hawk. Santana turned and looked at her, shooting her a reassuring yet somewhat nervous smile. Brittany's eyes narrowed and her eyebrow quirked slightly, silently asking Santana what was wrong.
That's one sort-of downside to being with someone for as long as they have, that one person knows you inside and out, making it almost impossible to keep something from them. It had been hell these past 6 years keeping the Puck secret to herself, but she managed it.
Damn, Puck…. The whole reason she was in this mess in the first place. Well, actually, to be fair to the poor guy, it wasn't him who caused all this. It was his stupid, idiotic, sad-excuse-for-a-human-being, deadbeat dad who started it all. If he hadn't come back and ruined his son's life by saying all that shit to him, the future would've turned out a lot different, a lot better.
She never understood all the worries Puck had about the future. Him and Rach, well, they would've made it. It wouldn't have been easy, but they had enough love in their lives, enough family and friends who would do almost anything for them and their in-coming baby, that they would have been fine.
But that ass had to come back and fill his son's head with all that messed up crap, make said son have a nice little meltdown, and put together this shit plan in his head that pretty much ruined his life. Well, she is still hoping that that shit plan didn't actually ruin his life, but she can't be sure….
She has been by Rachel's side these past 6 years, and she really doesn't know for sure if the tiny girl is even going to let Puck get one word out before she kicks him in his "happy place" and let's Sam and the other guys take care of what's left of him, not even sparing him a second glance as she leads Eli away before any damage can be done.
The Rachel she knew in high school might take a different approach, probably let him state his case, or hell, just run up and hug him, saying how all is forgiven and how much she has missed him, all the while sobbing like a 2 year old.
But that was the old, naive Rachel. The Rachel that believed in Broadway and happy ending. The Rachel that dreamed of sparkly stars and shining lights. The girl who dreamed of New York, and thought all her dreams were going to come true simply because she worked hard.
No, that Rachel is long gone, buried, dead for good.
The Rachel that she sees in front of her right now, laughing and smiling, right hand clasped tight around the hand of a little boy with hazel eyes and a blinding smile? Well, this is the new and improved Rachel Berry. The Rachel Berry that knows not all dreams come true, no matter how hard you work, or how bad you want it. The Rachel that discovered a life of putting someone else before yourself in everything. The Rachel that would do anything, and she means anything for her son, her true pride and joy.
Santana had absolutely no idea what this Rachel was going to do when Puck showed up. She had been thinking about this day for the past 6 years, and it hasn't helped that she has seen Rachel grow stronger day by day, her despise for Puck growing at the same pace. Now, she doesn't say hatred for Puck, because hatred and despise are two very different things. You can grow to not despise someone. You can forgive them and start to see all the good qualities again. You can grow to love them again.
Hate? If you hate someone, that hate never fully goes away, no matter what you do. You can forgive them, start to like them again, even start to love them again, but that hate? it's always in your heart. Always there, no matter how much you want to move on, you really can't, because what they did to you was so horrible, you'll never be able to fully forgive them, fully love them.
If Rachel hates Puck, that's it. There is no second chance, no clean slate. She has tried her best to keep it from the true, deep hatred point, but, though she will deny it if anyone but her repeats it, Santana is only so good. She can only do so much, and she doesn't know if what she did was enough to keep Rachel on that thin line between despise and hate.
That's another reason she is so nervous for tonight. Not only for the whole RachelPuckEli thing, but because if Rachel really does hate Puck, like truly, TRULY hate him, then Santana will have to be the best friend, and keep Puck away.
Yup, she will have to turn on him, just like she did to Rachel when she agreed to keep Puck's secret, but she doesn't care. She might be a bitch in a lot of other areas of her life, ok,a majority of other areas of her life, but when it comes to her friends? She only does what she thinks is best for them. She is like freaky loyal, and once she deems you acceptable? Your stuck for life.
So if Rachel needs her to go all crazy psycho bitch best friend on Puck to get him the hell away from her and Eli? Well then call her crazy psycho bitch #1 (because she knows Quinn, Hummel, and Brit will all do the same, but she likes to think of herself as Rachel's BEST best friend, so she gets the #1 spot, thank you very much).
So yeah, she has a hell of a lot to be nervous about right now, and feeling Brit's eyes on her while she goes around hugging everyone isn't helping in the slightest. She's doing her rounds, chatting with everyone, Tina and Artie, Finn and Quinn, Mike and Matt, when she lands in front of Sam.
Lovable little Samuel Evans, with his kind blue eyes, his now dirty blond hair, and his large, pearly white smile. He hugs her tight, saying how happy he is to see her, and asking her how she has been. Her smile is a bit fake while she catches him up on some of the more current happenings in her life, because though she might talk to Rachel everyday, and Sam is almost always around the Berry household, shouting a "Hey" every now and again, she hasn't really talked to him since high school.
She asks how he's been, and he talks a bit about his job and his family, but soon it's all about how well Eli is doing at school, and how great the new glee club is sounding thanks to Rachel and her amazing talent (his exact words), and Santana starts to feel the guilt creep into the pit of her stomach.
Well crap. She forgot about Sam. She forgot about how this would affect him, affect the little family life he has with Rachel and Eli. Don't get her wrong, she does believe that this family is Puck's, and Puck's only, but Sam has been so great. He picked Rachel up at her lowest point, and put her on the path to her new future, all the while holding her hand for the stability and the security she needed. He was like a dad to Eli, without ever actually taking to name. He was perfect. The perfect gentleman, the perfect friend, the perfect role model, and the perfect stand-in father. But that was it, the perfect stand-in father. He wasn't really the father, though to most people's eyes, he was. The male in the Berry household you could say.
But to Santana, it just didn't look right. Sam with Rachel and Eli? Something was just…. off, and she knew exactly what that was. So she swallowed the guilt, and reminded herself that Sam would be fine, that he would go off and make his own family. That was just the type of guy he was. He would be fine.
She repeated this a few more times to herself, and buried the guilt deeper down. There would be more than enough time for guilt after this whole thing was over. So she smiled and laughed, trying to savor the evening as it was now, knowing it wouldn't last very long.
When the dancing started, She thought it was a good idea to sit down. The room was getting stuffy, and she was getting a little antsy, so she thought it best to just fit and calm down a bit. After a couple of minutes, her phone buzzed. She looked down and replied quickly.
She closed her eyes for a brief second, breathed in and out slowly, and shot her head up to stare at the exit, waiting.
This was it…
YAY! It's done! I wanted to get a chapter in between the Rachel/Puck meeting, and this was it! I actually don't know about what the next chapter is going to be about yet, but i promise to stick at least a little smidge of Puckleberry in it, even if it is hostile Puckleberry ;)
Thanks for reading! If you would like to make my day, and I'm praying you do, you can review.. PLEASE! It seriously does make my day. It's a sad fact, bt it's true….
Don't really have an exciting life…. so make it extra special!
3, D