"Kel? Can I ask you for a favor?"
"Of course."
"Can we– can we pretend, just for a little while, that I'm not the prince?"
"What do you mean?"
"Please, Kel. I just– I don't think it'll be much longer before they finalize the new betrothal contract."
She stiffened and her nostrils flared. "Roald..."
"I know that there can't really be anything between us. But I'm asking for a chance to pretend that there can, before pretending becomes a betrayal."
She was silent for a long moment. "Won't it just make things worse? To have a single moment, one that can never be repeated? We've been pretending for a long time, Roald, pretending that we only think of each other as friends. Just having this conversation will make it harder, you know it will. If we add a memory of a might-have-been– will we be able to act as though it didn't happen? To go back to the way we were?"
"I don't care. I don't want to care."
"One of us has to."
"Why? Why do we have to care?" he asked, suddenly angry. "Why do we have to pretend at all? Why can't we just be us– just be Kel and Roald and let that be enough?"
"Because we aren't just Kel and Roald. I'm Keladry of Mindelan, future Lady Knight, and you're Roald of Conté, future K–"
"Don't say it," he said harshly. "Just don't."
"Roald, we have to find a way to let this go," she said quietly. "It'll kill us if we don't."
He sighed, and the anger was replaced by weariness. "I know," he said, his voice just as soft as hers. "Believe me, Kel, I know." Silence fell again as each considered the other. Before he could think it through, before she could voice any objections, he leaned forward and kissed her. It was not the kiss he wanted to give her, joyful and loving, the start of something bright and wonderful. Nor was it the kiss he had both dreaded and longed for, something desperate and heated, the result of passion overwhelming reason. Instead, it was soft, chaste, and bittersweet, the end of a Something that never really was.
Roald kissed Kel goodbye and held her. This would be their one and only moment, a memory to keep when he had to let her go. "I love you, Kel."
"I love you, too, Roald."
"I wish that things could be different."
"I know."
He drew in a deep breath, and let it out slowly, loosening his hold on her and taking a step back. He left his hands on her shoulders and looked into her eyes. "Gods all bless, Squire Keladry of Mindelan," he said, and released her.
She hesitated for a moment, then bowed. "Gods all bless, Your Highness."
They smiled at each other then, and felt… better. Lighter. Still sad, but not bereft.
It was over, yes, over before it had begun– but for one small, bittersweet moment, it hadn't mattered that he would be the king and she would never be a queen. For a moment, they had just been Roald and Kel.
It wasn't much, but it was enough.