Why Not?...chapter three. Alrighty then, let's get this show on the road…but first, a word from the authoress…

Thanks for the reviews, everyone! I got some, though, that complained of confusion.

Do not despair, my chickadees! (stunned silence)

I mean…it won't be confusing any longer, for I will use little parenthesed character labels! Now everyone will know that it's not Gazzy, it's Iggy talking about something he shouldn't be talking about.

Thanks for your patience.

-b-o-h-e-m-i-a-n-r-h-a-p-s-o-d-y-

Fang stretched slowly, leaning back as far as he could without breaking a bone. He came back up, only to smack straight into Nudge's smiling gob.

"Fangfangfangfang FAAAANNGGGG!!!" she squealed, grabbing his arm and hauling him through the open door.

"What?" he asked irritably. He only could tolerate so many insane Nudge attacks, and this one was the fifth for the week.

"I can't tell you what's going on," she answered, plopping him down into a chair and tying his wrists to the armrests, "because it's a secret."

"Oh, really…" said Fang, now getting annoyed.

Suddenly a crash sounded from behind a door, and a voice that Fang quickly recognized as Max's said, "Crap, the beans!"

He looked back at Nudge. "You're not really going to force me to…"

"…Eat my food?" answered Max, coming through the door with a steaming plate of spicy red stuff. "You're the lucky vic-I mean, lucky winner!" She placed the plate in front of him with a flourish. "Bon appetit!"

"I'd like to know what I'm eating before I eat it." (Fang)

"Fine. It's chili." (Max.)

Fang hesitantly took a spoonful of the reddish mush, chewed, swallowed, and belched. "'Scuse me."

"So?! Are you dead?! Did Max's cooking finally claim a wretched victim?!" asked Gazzy, his blonde hair wisping around.

"I'm not dead. It was actually kinda good."

Max's face lit up.

-i-s-w-i-m-w-i-t-h-t-h-e-t-u-r-t-l-e-s-

Iggy sighed.

He was bored.

Again.

So what happens when Iggy's bored?

Stuff blows up.

Usually, the stuff that blows up is very…expensive.

Like Max's favorite pair of non-Salvation-Army cargo pants.

And Fang's first real leather jacket.

And Nudge's clock radio.

Well, not so much the clock radio.

Iggy stood up, ran into the wall, cursed, turned around, and ran into another wall.

It was then that he realized he'd locked himself in a closet the previous night, to give Max and Fang "some privacy" as they "made out".

He finally found the lock, and his nimble fingers easily opened the catch.

"DETERIORATING!!!" yelled Nudge's voice from halfway across the house.

"WTF?" said Fang.

Iggy found a length of wire, took some C4 out of his pants pocket (Don't ask me why he had a dangerous explosive in his pants pocket. Iggy's loaded with explosive stuff. I don't know how he gets it all…) and wired a quick bomb.

He threw the C4 out of the window and hung on to the wire.

All it took was a simple push of a button and a quick throw…

BOOOOM.

"What the hell?" came Max's frazzled voice from her room.

"What?!" yelled Fang, also in Max's room.

"It was Iggy," said Angel smugly.

Iggy took the liberty of helping himself to some more wire, then felt his way back to the closet and locked himself back in.

"Well, I'm not bored anymore…"

-k-i-l-l-i-n-g-t-i-m-e-

"Bumblebees." (Nudge)

"Your face." (Gazzy)

"Your mom's face."

"You suck, you know that?"

"Break it up, small children." (Fang)

"Oh, Fang…I love you!!" (Max)

"W00t!!!eleven!!!11!!! Let's go have a clichéd make-out scene!!"

"(stunned silence)…"

"Gaaaaaaazzzyyyyyyyy…." (Angel)

"What, Angel?"

"Po, po, po…po….potato! Potato!"

"That's nice."(Iggy)

"My…baloney has a first name, it's I-g-g-i-e…"

"That's not how you spell it."

"I don't care…My baloney has a second name, it's s-u-c-k-s…"

"Damn you."

"(gasp) THE PROFANITY!!!! OH, THE PROFANITY!!!!"

"PROFANITY!!!eleven!!!!"

"Shut up, wee ones."

"Yeah. We're trying to make out here."

---

Review?