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Teacher's Pet
Chapter 7

Dammit Haruka, you don't even know this person yet you're willing to call her and tell her everything about your past. What if she judges me like all the others have? Or, what if she tries to give me a pity party? I don't think I could handle a pity party. What is this feeling? I feel so confused.

I ran my fingers through my hair as I stared at the paper in my hands. I can't do this. I discarded the paper and reached for the remote. Just do it Haruka. I looked down at the paper, then back at the TV. Just because she said it was alright to call her, doesn't mean she'll accept it. 'People like us…' I could hear her voice in my head. She's like me, she doesn't like men, and apparently she's single. 'Would you be…?' Again her voice played in my head. If Rune hadn't of come out of the room, what would she have asked me? Just do it already. She gave you her number; she wants you to call her.

Alright, I'll do it. I got off my bed and picked up the piece of paper from the floor. I flipped open my phone and slowly dialed each of those numbers. When I placed my phone to my ear I could hear the ringing on the other side. Why was I so nervous? I felt like a little girl with a crush, and I'm calling them for the very first time.

"Hello?"

Oh god I can't do this. I quickly hung up the phone and looked at it. Great, now I just hung up on her. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Each time I banged the phone against my head. OK, I'll try it again. I once again dialed each of the numbers and waited for a response.

"Hello?" This time her voice sounded a little agitated.

"Um…I'm sorry." Again I found myself hanging up. What the hell was wrong with me? Why couldn't I just talk to her like I could when we were face to face?

I jumped when my phone rang. I hesitated to look at the window on the front of my phone. Sure enough, her number appeared on the front.

"Hello." I spoke softly as I tried to hide my nervousness.

"Haruka?" Her voice sounded worried. "Is that you?"

I bit my lip, the thought of hanging up the phone again ran through my mind. It would be so much easier to turn my phone off for the night, and simply deal with her tomorrow when I picked up Rune from school. "Yea…I'm sorry."

"No don't hang up again! Are you alright?"

I turned the volume down on my television and leaned back against the pillows on my bed. "Yea, I guess so."

"I told you, you can call me whenever you want. I can lend an ear."

She sounded so compassionate. What was this that I'm feeling for her? "I'm sorry for what Setsuna said to you earlier. She really shouldn't have."

"No, it's quite alright. I think I deserved it. I really shouldn't have stepped out of my boundaries like I did. I just…it's that I liked Rune so much that I only wanted to help him."

So she didn't like me then. Who was I trying to fool? Nobody wants to date a 22 year old with a child. "He's fine though, he's just not used to playing with other kids."

"I'm getting a feeling that you didn't call me to talk about your son, did you?"

I bit my lip. No, I called you to tell you how I want to see you again. I sighed lightly. "No, not really." Why do I want to tell her about my horrible habit? Why do I want to tell her that I want to see her all the time? Good god I just met her a few days ago.

"Is it about your meeting today?"

Don't start probing me; please, just let me talk. "It just hurts so much. Each and every time it's brought up…I hurt myself."

"What do you mean you hurt yourself?"

I could hear her voice shaking. "I just hurt myself…It lets the pain out." I smiled a sad smile as I looked down at my forearm which had a long scab running down the inside of it. I couldn't tell her how good it felt to do it. "There's something different about you…It's almost like I can tell you anything that I couldn't tell to anybody else. Not even to Setsuna." I wiped a tear from my eye. "It hurt so much, what they did to me. I don't think I'll ever forget it. I don't even know how I'll explain it to Rune when he's old enough to understand."

"I'm sure you'll figure it out. You're a smart woman."

I smiled slightly. "You're sweet, thank you. Setsuna doesn't even know the pain that I feel. All she knows is that whenever it's brought up I lock myself in my bedroom all night long. I'm thankful to have her so she can look over Rune."

"It's good that you have help with him. I'm sure he's a handful sometimes."

"Yea, he is. After they got home he started picking on me, saying that I li-" I quickly caught myself before I finished the sentence.

"That you what?"

"Nothing…don't worry about it." I quickly changed the subject before she got suspicious. "What were you going to ask me earlier?"

I could hear her clear her throat and take a deep breath. "Well, would you be interested in coming over one night for dinner. Just me and you. I can make whatever you'd like me to make."

"I…" I blushed as I thought about her invitation. I really shouldn't. What about Rune? No…I can't live like this anymore, I need something more than a friend in my life. "I think I'd like that."

She breathed a sigh of relief as she heard my response. "How about Friday night? I can give you my home address tomorrow when you pick up Rune at the end of the day."

"I'd like that…You should probably get some rest, I'm sure a bunch of 5-year-olds wear you out through the day."

She giggled at me, it was such a cute sound. "I'll see you tomorrow Haruka, good night."

"Good night."

I hung up my phone and plugged it into the charger. Just that little bit of conversation made me feel so much better. I think I can trust her, she didn't judge me at all. Maybe I can tell her more when we're completely alone on Friday.