idk man. had some layclaire feels but i haven't been up to writing anything long. so i wrote this tiny drabble. bear with me.
next drabble will probably take place from claire's point of view, as i have an idea, and then i'll continue that ffx au a little bit.
Moving away from his tiny, quaint flat is hard to do. But in light of recent events that have been even harder to deal with, he needs to go. Perhaps a change of scenery will make things easier, if only a little bit.
He got that teaching position anyway, so if anyone asks, he can routinely answer the way he normally does - to be closer to his new job.
There's no way to make losing her easier. But after talking to his mother, leaving this flat for another one might be one way to ease himself into the process.
Really, though, he can't imagine staying here any longer. Knowing that just a few blocks down is where that awful accident happened, where she took her last few breaths, makes him almost violently ill.
He can't decrease his need to grieve or mourn, but he can increase the distance between him and the last place he'll ever want to be.
As he lifts a box up off the floor, he stares back at the emptiness of it all. It feels sad, leaves him feeling some sort of heavy emotion, but he knows he has to move on - in more ways than one. His life has to go on without her, and this may just be how he has to start the changes that have been going through his life. Things are growing heavier, without her, after all.
Maybe this will lighten his load (metaphorically, of course, because the boxes of books he's been carrying sure are heavy). He needs that. He needs his shoulders to feel like the heavy weight left by sadness and grief (and the hours where he panicked over trying to remember his last words to her and vice versa) is being slowly lifted off. He doesn't know if the weight will ever truly leave, but he knows that he can try to remove some of it.
It's what she'd want, after all.