If heaven's grief brings hell's rain
Then I'd trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday

Oh, I want to teach you a lesson in the worst kind of way
Still I'd trade all my tomorrows for just one yesterday

The plane touched down at SeaTac at just past three in the afternoon. Bella was forced into the aisle seat on the small plane; her only option was to look at a young mother, and her fussy child. Of course, she didn't have to watch the slightly aggravating duo, but that was the best choice. She spent all of the six hour flight scowling at the romantic movie in front of her, or the honeymooning couple to her left.

At some point, she tried to rationalize that there was nothing wrong with the sappiness going on around her. If she was lucky, she'd have that soon anyway. Lucky. She was never a lucky person. In all her life, she only had a few things that she was truly grateful for. Her friends from New York; she didn't really have any in Forks. Her parents; they weren't together anymore, but they were happy. Her mother had Phil, and her father had just begun dating a nice woman named Sue. Her job; she was about to become the youngest Editor- In- Chief The Times had ever seen.

Okay, so maybe she was luckier than she thought. Still, there was something she always knew that she was lacking. And it was entirely her own fault. She could be happy; she could have the world at her fingertips, she could have absolutely no regrets. But, five years ago, she threw it all out the window. Why? Because she didn't like the setting.

Since when didn't the princess ever complain about the prince's castle being on the wrong hill? God, now she sounded like some delirious little girl dreaming of fairytales. Bella had to mentally slap herself at that one. She didn't believe in fairytales; at least, not since she abandoned her prince.

For the rest of her flight, she sat by angrily trying to will the plane to land.

It wasn't until the nasally, overly sweet voice of a stewardess announced that the plane would be landing shortly, did Bella realize a problem. In her excitement at her newfound courage, and the haze of the feelings she may be able to recover, she hadn't made any plans for once she arrived in Seattle. With a huff, she exited the aircraft, her suitcase trailing behind her.

After nearly an hour, she found a cheap motel. It wasn't like the ones in the movies, with the terribly old furniture, and the questionable cleanliness. The establishment was neat, though it didn't compare to a five star hotel.

She knew that she shouldn't waste any time; she should go to the hospital, the one he always talked of working in. But, she was nervous. What would he do after not seeing her all these years? Would he even remember her? What if he was with someone else? Her thoughts were leading to a dark place, and she was scared.

When she was through at the motel, she decided to go out, to see the sights. She spent hours, walking the streets, coffee in hand, a smile on her face, wondering why she ever left. Yes, she hated Forks. She didn't want to be stuck there, like her father. But Seattle was different. Could anyone be stuck in a place that was so free? Forks had trees encroaching from every side, they kept you in, suffocated you. Here, there was always something- something to do, something to see, and, if you got on the freeway, an infinity of more places to go.

This was what he wanted anyway. Suddenly, Bella became aware of another problem. He wanted to go to Seattle, to work at the children's hospital, under his father, who was the chief of staff there. If he was still in Washington, then he was here. He hadn't stayed in that stupid little town.

And now, Bella was sitting alone, in a park, hating herself. If she had only decided this sooner. She didn't care where she was living, she didn't care if she had her amazing job or not. She was content here, even sitting alone on this random park bench in the middle of a small field. If only she could go back in time, and tell herself this before she left.

What would she do now? What was the plan? She was an idiot, and she could live with that. But, she had hurt him. She could see the pain in his eyes when she gave up on them, for New York City, a new place, with new people, a place she didn't know.

She was a terrible person.

XxxXxxX

They say that children are more intuitive than we think. They see things in a way that is foreign to adults, and they would do things, things they deem perfectly normal, that adults would never think of. What is it that makes children notice the things adults don't see, or the things they ignore? What is it that takes away their filter, and lets them say the first thing on their mind, which is so often the right thing?

Those were the things on Bella's mind as she found herself talking to a rather social little girl. She kept asking why Bella wasn't smiling. She bounced on the bench beside Bella, and asked if she was sad. Of course, Bella told her no, that she was just thinking about something very complicated, that she was trying to work out a solution to a problem.

The little girl continued to jabber on until a loud voice pierced through the relative silence of the mostly empty park. "Elizabeth!" The woman's voice was clear, and strong, and it made the little girl's head rise to look out over the playground.

The woman who came into view was obviously the girl's mother. They had the exact same shade of crystal blue eyes, and their faces were very similar. She looked angry at first, before her eyes softened, and she smiled.

"I told you to stay on the playground, where I can see you," She said to the little girl. It looked as though the woman had been crying.

"Oops," she said in a tiny little voice. "I'll go play Mama" And then she was off towards the playground, to talk to a little boy on the swings.

After a moment, the woman sat down next to Bella to watch her daughter.

"That's your daughter?" Bella asked, though clearly, she was.

The blond woman sneered at her for a moment, before wiping it away, ashamed. "I'm sorry," she started, "I'm not mad at you. Hell, I don't even know you. I'm just mad at everything today, I guess."

"Well, I didn't mean to cause any problems. I'm Bella by the way," She stuck out her hand. The blond woman took it easily enough, and Bella was glad she wasn't mad at her. When she had come up to the bench with such an angry face, Bella was sure the woman had her pegged as some kind of kidnapper. Anyways, it wasn't her fault that this just happened to be the worst week of Tanya's life.

"Tanya," She responded when they were through shaking. "And I am sorry. This has just been a really tough week for me."

"It's alright," Bella answered automatically. Maybe it was a tough week for everyone. At least she wasn't alone. They talked for a while, just idle chit chat, and Bella was sure that she was making her first friend in Washington since Jessica Stanley and Mike Newton.

At some point, Bella mentioned her reason for coming to the city. It made Tanya smile to think of the fairytale love Bella seemed to be chasing. God, she wanted that back. She would do anything for it. Later, Tanya admonished her own troubles. Her loving husband had just recently asked for a divorce.

Needless to say, their conversation didn't last much longer.

Just after the awkward silence ensued, Elizabeth returned to the bench to tell her mother that she was tired. She yawned, and rubbed her eyes from where she stood, explaining how she went so high she could touch the sky. Her happy expression made Bella giggle.

So Bella was alone again. At that point in the day, she figured she'd get some take out and head back to her motel room. That wasn't the plan for the day at all, but if he was anywhere in this city, then he'd be there tomorrow. She was just so tired anyway. Cross country flights do take a lot out of you.

By the time she had her Chinese food, it was cold, and she was almost dead on her feet. It was only two blocks back to the motel, so she didn't bother with a taxi. It wasn't late when she arrived at her room, but, even so, she found that each time she blinked, it was harder and harder to open her eyes again.

Now, normally, being that she was only a few yards from her door, she would simply have to stick her key in the hole, and fall on to her bed. But, that was not the case. After the events of the day, her mind was so clouded with drowsiness, Tanya, and him that she wasn't watching what she was doing. It got even worse when she found that the key wasn't fitting into the lock correctly, and the door wouldn't budge an inch.

That was until, "Um, excuse me, I think you have the wrong room."