"JAMES!" I scream, as I rip his hand away from my mouth.

"I'm sorry." He says as he takes a step back.

"What are you doing here?" I ask, not even caring that he's here.

"I had to leave the hospital. I was afraid, the men in those suits were with… never mind." Bucky says as he shakes his head.

"With who?" I ask confused.

"No one." Bucky says as he changes the subject.

"I didn't hurt you, did I?" Bucky asks as he looks at me.

"No, I'm fine." I say as I shrug.

"I didn't know, where else to go." Bucky says, as he looks at his feet. He looks like a lost puppy.

"How did you even find my address?" I ask curious.

"I found your file on a man's desk." He says as he shrugs.

"Probably Dr. McIntyre." I say as I roll my eyes. He was always looking for a reason to fire me. "I'm glad you came here." I say as I reach up, to rest my hand on Bucky's shoulder. Bucky doesn't flinch this time. Instead, he takes my hand and he stares at it.

"I don't remember the last time, I felt a woman's touch." He whispers, more to himself than to me.

"I can't say, that I remember a man's touch either." I say, making myself laugh a little.

All the men, I have chosen over the years. Ended up being cheaters, and not worth remembering.

Bucky looks up at me, and he just stares at me... I feel like stepping back from him, but I'm not sure why. I can't read the look in his eyes, that's all I know right now.

Bucky let's go of my hand, and I let it fall to my side.

"Did you see that guy?" Bucky asks.

"Guy?" I ask confused.

"The one, who came to my room. He talked to me last night." Bucky says as he stares into space. It was like, he's trying to remember something.

"Yes, I did see Steve. He was worried about you." I say as I nod.

"I knew him. I just don't know why… at least, not yet anyway." Bucky mumbles.

"He's with you, 'till the end of the line James." I say, making Bucky's eyes lock on me. I can see his mind working.

"I thought he was smaller. But, then he turned into this soldier. I was afraid they would just use him." Bucky says, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Smaller?" I ask confused.

"I went off to war, he wanted to follow… I couldn't let anything happen to him. I needed to protect him… always." Bucky continues.

"Like a big brother." I say as I smile a little.

"But the pain… the experiments… oh god… I thought, I'd never see him again. I never thought, I'd see anyone ever again… the nightmares, they…" Bucky starts shaking.

I put my hand up, to either calm him down or to protect myself.

Bucky raises his hands in front of him, and his sleeves fall down a little on his arms. His left arm, isn't skin… it's made of metal.

Without thinking it through. I raise my hand, and I lightly touch the cold metal. Bucky's hands clench into fists, and he lets out this blood curdling scream.

The scream scares me half to death. I jump back, and I stare at him frightened.

"THEY USED ME! THE THINGS THEY MADE ME DO!" Bucky screams, his hands still balled into fists. Bucky looks at his metal hand, and he punches a hole through my wall. He rests his head against the wall, and he cries.

"They almost, made me kill my friend. I don't even remember him! They took so much from me! They treated me like a monster!" Bucky screams.

I could feel my heartbreaking. The horrors he went through… I couldn't even bring myself to think of them.

"They should've just left me to die! I don't know how to be the man I was, anymore…" Bucky says as he stays standing in front of my wall.

"James…" I whisper as I hesitantly walk toward him.

Bucky doesn't move, he just stays in front of the wall crying in silence.

"You're not a monster. I can't imagine what you went through. But, the man I see before me… is NOT a monster, he's a victim. A victim who survived, and he is trying to become a better man. Steve worries so much about you! He isn't angry about what they made you do, you're still family to him." I say as I rest my hand on his shoulder. Bucky silently turns his head to look at me.

"You don't even know me, and you give me all these lies. Who do you think you are?" Bucky says. Suddenly, he starts turning his anger toward me.

"Lies? James… what do you mean?" I say confused as I take a step back.

"Do you know, the code name they gave me? The things I did? The people I hurt? The families I destroyed? BECAUSE I DON'T! I DON'T THINK I EVER WILL! I DON'T KNOW WHO I AM! You keep saying this name… which means nothing to me. The man who came to my room, I don't even know him. Is this some sort of game to all of you? You think you can toy with a man like me? I DIDN'T ASK TO BE TORN APART. I DIDN'T ASK TO BE REMADE OVER, AND OVER AGAIN! I DIDN'T ASK TO BE THIS… I DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS ARM… I DIDN'T ASK FOR ANY OF THIS! I NEVER EVEN HAD A VOICE, IN ANYTHING THEY DID TO ME! Don't even think that your words will help me. They mean nothing to me. I don't know why I bothered coming here." Bucky says, and then he turns to walk out my front door.

"James… please… I want to help you. I honestly don't know what to say. I'm trying my best. I don't know your story, I don't know you, and I don't know your friend. Just please let me help you. I know you need it… NO… I know you WANT it. Please…" I beg, hoping he won't leave. If he does, I'm afraid I won't see him again.

Why do I want him to stay though? This man could easily kill me… given the chance that is. I'm sure he's killed before… but none of that seems to bother me. I just want him to stop hurting.

Bucky stands in my doorway, with his back facing me. I could see his shoulders move up and down, as he breathes heavily.

"Please…" I say as I reach my hand out toward him.

Bucky turns his head to look at me, but his hair covers his face.

"I want to help you." I say barley above a whisper, as fear steals my voice.

Bucky turns his head away from me. Before I know it, he walks out the door without a word.

I stand in the middle of the floor speechless. I don't know how to react. The pain he was feeling, I wanted to take that all away for him. I didn't know this man, I knew I wasn't supposed to get invested in patients. But something about him… the thought alone, of him being out there on his own… lost, hurt, and confused… I could feel my own pain, pouring out of my eyes and running down my cheeks.

"You didn't have to do this alone…" I whisper to myself, as I collapse on the floor sobbing.