Chapter two
Over the next few weeks, Harry spent most of his time alone. Hermione was finally reunited with her parents who had returned to England the moment they settled their affairs in Australia. Ron was getting to know his girlfriend's parents, so naturally he was a nervous wreck. Harry met them, he thought they were very nice people, but after that Harry wanted some time alone.
One reason he wanted to be alone, Hermione was still dropping hints about Ginny even asking Harry to allow her to enter his home, which he refused. He knew if he did give her permission then she would never leave him alone.
Whenever Harry visited the Burrow Ginny was constantly around as well, always trying to get Harry's attention, offering him food or a drink, talking about quidditch and even bringing up their time together at Hogwarts. She had never asked outright if they could get back together but Harry could see that is exactly what she wanted.
At first Harry was friendly but when she kept grabbing his arm or putting her hand on his leg when she sat next to him, Harry finally had enough. He would jerk away from her, sometimes he looked coldly at her, the last time he had seen her Harry had acted as if she wasn't there, which he knew hurt her but she refused to stop crowding him.
One time Harry thought of just leaving, not just to go away on a holiday but leave for a long time. Go to a country where he could disappear, at least for a while. But he couldn't leave for good, he had fought and bled for this country, his parents were born there, he was born there, this was his home.
One thing Harry was concerned about, he didn't know if he could ever get physical with anyone, he hoped that wasn't the case but if he decided to try, making sure he wasn't recognised would be something Harry would do. For now he knew he couldn't so he just had to get his friends to stop trying to make Harry and Ginny get together.
One thing Harry did do was use a few glamour charms, he changed just enough of his appearance that no one would pick up the fact he was Harry Potter, the wizarding world's hero. He went to a few places that gay men spent time at, usually it was warded from anyone seeing anything they shouldn't. It gave the gay men time to have a night out, have dinner together, dance together and there were rooms for when the men wanted to take their night further. The men that only wanted the one night usually used those rooms.
Harry only went to see how he would handle spending time with a man, maybe a dance, but it only took a few minutes being inside the club before Harry's panic set in making him run. At first it was just to try to see if he could do it, he wanted to try a lot of things now he was free of Voldemort, but he couldn't.
Harry did try other things, one night at his home he got drunk, he had walked around naked, just doing silly things he always wanted to do. But sex was something everyone did and it was time Harry acted like an adult, yet his mind kept conjuring up painful memories. Harry wondered if maybe it was because they were strange men, he did wonder if he eventually could care about the man that he could go through with it, but he didn't know how to meet a man that wouldn't want sex, at least for a long time.
It was the middle of July when Harry was eating his breakfast as an owl flew in and dropped a large envelope on the table before flying off. Harry stared at the envelope and saw the Hogwarts crest, so he knew what this was.
Harry never bothered to open it, but the moment he finished his breakfast he took the envelope into his office where he put the Hogwarts letter in another large envelope before adding a letter he had ready. He handed the letter to his new owl, Oscar.
'Take that to Severus Snape at Hogwarts, thanks Oscar.'
Harry waited until the owl left before he decided to go out. He had a feeling letters would arrive, one probably from McGonagall, maybe even from Snape. Harry wondered why he hadn't received any letters from Molly Weasley about returning to Hogwarts. If she had paid Harry any attention at the Burrow she would see a very different man to the boy she knew, one that was confident and was not afraid to tell someone to butt out of his life, Molly still didn't give up, she treated him and everyone else as kid.
After hearing about the prophecy and realising his life was never his own, he was just a pawn for Dumbledore to move around and use any way he wanted. Harry said no more, no one was going to tell him what to do or how to live his life.
Harry spent the day in muggle London, mainly window shopping, but occasionally going into a shop to buy something. When he got home he had a few letters sitting on his dining table. He always left his laundry window open for Oscar to come and go, so he knew the owls had found their way in.
Harry poured himself a glass of Firewhiskey before sitting at the table. He moved the letters around, seeing two from Hogwarts, one from Molly, one from the minister for magic and one from the auror department. Harry decided to see what the head auror wanted.
"Dear Mr. Potter, I recently found out that you are not returning to Hogwarts to do your final year. As you know to be accepted into the auror training program you must receive O in the five core subjects needed for your N.E.W.T.s to be accepted into the auror training program. I hope our conversation did not change your mind from doing your duty. So in a years' time I look forward to training you as I know you will receive the necessary grades."
Harry shook his head at the letter thinking how dare this man assume he would do what he was told, do his duty. He had done it and as far as Harry was concerned he was never going to do anything again, not unless he wanted to, he scrunched it up and tossed it into his bin.
Harry opened the letter from Kingsley next, "Dear Harry, I heard the strangest rumour, that you were not returning to Hogwarts to finish your education. I know that can't be true as you often hounded me with questions regarding aurors. I hope you do well this year and I know you will pass your exams, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Minister for Magic."
Harry scrunched up that letter and threw it in the bin before he reached for the next one.
"Dear Harry, the headmaster informed me of your letter, if it is true then you are jeopardising your future. I would like to talk to you in regards to this in the hope we can come to some arrangements. Minerva McGonagall, deputy headmistress, Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry."
Harry didn't throw this letter out, McGonagall deserved a response. He opened the next letter and started to read.
"Mr. Potter, if that is you're decision then I will take your name off the class schedules. But I wish to point out that even though you are admired by the wizarding world that does not give you an automatic pass in your exams. You should not expect to be given any job you wish without the proper grades. Severus Snape, Headmaster, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry."
'Figures, you think I want to get stuff when I don't deserve it Snape, you always did, well fuck you,' Harry scrunched up the letter and was about to toss it when he changed his mind.
After reading a few more letters that ended up in his bin, including Molly Weasley's, Harry went to his office to respond to two letters, first McGonagall, explaining that he wasn't returning to Hogwarts for personal reasons.
Harry looked down at the empty parchment then started writing, "Headmaster, I don't give a damn what you think, but you are dead wrong. I did try to see if I could go into the auror program, offering to go through any test or trials the head auror wanted just to see if I was suitable, I was turned down because I have not finished my education. I am not returning to Hogwarts which means I cannot have my dream job and I would never use the way I'm thought of to try and get anything. I think you of all people would know what I am going through and why I cannot return to Hogwarts, if you don't then you're not as smart as you make yourself out to be, Lord Harrison James Potter, fuck off."
Harry chuckled then held out both the letters to his owl, 'The top one to Snape the other to McGonagall, hopefully you can rest after that Oscar,' he watched as his owl flew away before he headed upstairs to have a shower. Even though it was early Harry decided to read in bed and he just hoped no more owls arrived tomorrow.