Margaux carefully lifted the top off of the small shoebox Victoria had given her which contained several mementos Daniel had kept from his childhood. In it, she found a toy car, a worn out baseball, an airplane, a set of jacks, a ceramic footprint made when Daniel was a baby, and two photographs. One of them, presumably taken by Conrad, showed Victoria at the hospital on the day Daniel was born. A tiny, newborn Daniel lie asleep just a few feet away from her and Margaux couldn't help but smile to herself at the sight of him. He looked so beautiful and innocent lying there…a glimpse of what her own baby might look like in a couple of months.
She wondered what it would feel like, holding her baby in her arms for the first time with the knowledge that he or she would never come to know their father. The idea of it alone was enough to make her heart heavy. It wasn't just their father her child would never get a chance to know, but both of their grandfathers, their maternal grandmother, and all four of their grandparents. Victoria and her other two children were all that remained and neither Patrick nor Charlotte were currently in the picture. Margaux could only hope they would embrace their roles as aunt and uncle once the baby arrived. Her own upbringing had been such a lonely one, she couldn't bear the thought of her child suffering a similar one.
Pushing these notions aside, Margaux returned her focus to the box in front of her. The second photo she held depicted Victoria smiling as she lifted up an equally content baby Daniel, who was clad in a plaid-printed, flannel onesie befitting the holiday season. It was one of the few photos Margaux had seen of Daniel at that age, and, somehow, holding it in her hands just now made her feel closer to him. She was grateful to Victoria for having allowed her to keep all of these memories, as she knew how much they must mean to her.
She continued to rummage through the remaining contents of the box absentmindedly until the turn of a lock followed by the sound of clicking heels suddenly pulled her from her reverie.
"Good morning," Victoria's animated voice greeted from the foyer.
Margaux glanced up to see her stepmother walking towards her with a plastic bag in one hand and a small cardboard box in the other. She looked effortlessly put together, as usual, in a fitted black dress and matching burgundy coat.
"Someone's in a pleasant mood today," Margaux chirped as she stood up to greet Victoria with a kiss and proceeded to help her set the bags she was carrying on the table.
"I'm always happy to see you," Victoria returned, "and I brought us both breakfast."
"Oh, what is it today?"
Ever since Margaux's cravings had started, Victoria would often stop by her house with treats from all of her favorite French bakeries. It was just one of the many ways she had begun spoiling her stepdaughter since she'd learned she was pregnant.
"Strawberry crêpes from Michel's and some bagels with cream cheese, in case you're still hungry afterward."
Margaux shook her head, "You know me too well."
"I would've been here sooner but the traffic in the city was awful," Victoria explained as she reached into one of the bags to give Margaux her food.
"The city?"
"Mhm, I had to drive there for dessert."
Margaux looked down at the small box on the table, "Is that-?"
"Sprinkles," Victoria grinned mischievously.
"It would appear I'm not the only one having cravings," Margaux laughed.
She loved sharing these casual moments with Victoria. They reminded her of all of the wonderful times the two of them used to spend together when she would visit from Paris as a young girl.
"Are those Daniel's old things?" Victoria asked, taking notice of the keepsakes that lay on the table.
Margaux nodded, placing the items back inside the box and setting it aside to make space for her breakfast, "I was going through them before you got here."
Victoria smiled somewhat sadly, removing her coat and hanging it behind her chair before taking a seat at the end of the table.
"I didn't know he'd kept all of those things," she said after a while.
"He never told you?"
Victoria shook her head, "I suppose he was too embarrassed. Daniel ways always the sentimental type, but he didn't like showing it. You know how boys are."
Margaux knew Victoria's relationship with Daniel had suffered ever since he fell in love with Emily. She could see how much it pained Victoria, knowing that the two of them would never get the chance to make amends and return to their former closeness.
"The only two photos he kept…they were of him with you, Victoria. No one else."
Conrad's absence in Daniel's photos was one of the first things Margaux had noticed as she was studying them.
"I did find that curious," Victoria admitted, pausing to swallow a strawberry before she continued, "Daniel and I weren't exactly getting along as well as we used to these past three years, something I'm sure didn't escape your notice."
"Nevertheless, Daniel adored you, Victoria. Not a day went by that he didn't mention you in the six months you were away."
Victoria looked up from her plate, "You don't have to pretend for my sake, Margaux."
"It's the truth," Margaux insisted, "He may have been loathe to admit it, but Daniel miss you like hell when you were gone. So much so that he considered flying to Europe to find you. I encouraged him to go, but ultimately he decided against it. At the time I thought he was just being stubborn, but now I realize he only stayed because he didn't have any money to spare."
"I had no idea," the revelation had taken Victoria completely by surprise, lifting her spirits and returning her to her pleasant mood.
"You're an incredible mother, Victoria," Margaux told her, "I've always admired the love you have for your children."
"There's no doubt in my mind you'll make a wonderful mother as well," Victoria returned with a smile.
Margaux stiffened slightly, "Sometimes I wonder."
"Why is that?"
"Because," she answered trying to maintain her composure, "my own mother never cared for me the way a mother is supposed to care for her child. She left me with my father when I was four years old so she could continue to travel the world. After that I hardly saw her."
"I know, darling, and I am so sorry," Victoria lamented as she reached over to take Margaux's hand into her own, "but your mother's shortcomings aren't yours and they certainly don't determine the kind of parent you're going to be."
"How can you be so sure?" Margaux's tone was hopeful but full of uncertainty.
She wanted to be everything her child would need and more but her own parents had been so distant and she had practically grown up without a mother. What if she wasn't enough? How could she ever forgive herself for subjecting her child to the same dejected loneliness she herself had been forced to endure her entire life? Up until a few days go, none of these insecurities had so much as crossed her mind, but now that Margaux was beginning to envision everything caring for a child would entail, they were starting to manifest.
"Personal experience," Victoria replied with conviction. "My mother set the farthest thing from a good example for me as a parent, but I was still able to learn from her nevertheless."
"I don't understand."
"Thanks to her, I knew exactly what not to do," Victoria clarified.
The words hit Margaux like a violent revelation, causing her to reconsider the perspective in which she had previously been viewing her situation from.
"I never thought about it that way," she conceded, "but perhaps you're right. I don't know what's come over me lately; I've just been feeling so anxious all of the time."
"Don't worry about it," Victoria gave her hand a reassuring squeeze, "Just know that I'm here for you no matter what, and that you can always count on me to help you with whatever it is you need. It doesn't matter when, or what, or where... just give me a call, okay?"
Margaux nodded.
"Good," her stepmother smiled, "You're going to make a wonderful mother, Margaux."
"Merci, Victoria," she said returning the smile, "For everything. You're the closest I've ever come to having a real mother and I can't even begin to explain to you how much I've appreciated all you've done for me."
"Nonsense, that's what family's for," Victoria insisted. "You know I think of you as my daughter."
It was something she had already told Margaux twice before, but, for some reason, each time she said it felt like the first. And though Victoria would never come to know just how much those words meant to her stepdaughter, Margaux would always be grateful to her having said them.