A/N- hey guys! before I do anything else I want to inform y'all that the cover image I'm using now is the property of the amazing Mondlichtvogel. She was nice enough to draw it for me to use as a cover ^^ if you guys want to see any more of her art work, her deviantart account is called NyalaLightelve :) I'd give you all an exact link but apparently this website doesn't want me to post those here. Anyway, I'm on to the thank yous now. Mondlichtvogel: haha, I agree, grammar has much improved since you came along. I'm glad all the dialogue isn't boring you :D ScarletFire39: I promise that the ending won't be sad :) that's all I'll say. AnimeFan & Faye: i hope I didn't make you guys wait too long! Remi: thank you ;-; things will lighten up eventually, sort of. 3rdStreetSaint: thank you, I'll do my best! Ace: I swear everything will be okay in the end. And Mondlichtvogel drew that cover, I'm glad to see that you like it!
Disclaimer: I do not, nor will I ever own Saints Row or any of its characters. The content of this story was not meant to insult anyone in any way, shape or form. Rated T for violence, coarse language, and mild sexual content.
Chapter Fifteen: The Old and the New
I zip through the streets of Steelport, every thought in my mind directed towards one indisputable fact: Johnny Gat is not dead. Ever since I first woke up in that room filled with stasis pods on Zinyak's mothership, I'd had this strange feeling that he was not only alive, but near. I can't wait to see him again.
My feet carry me through downtown and then, without any warning, straight up the side of a building. As I notice the blue trail of light I leave in my wake, I find that I'm so so thankful for my superpowers. None of the others have them yet the way I do, but if Kinzie's logistics are right we might be able to program some of my magic into their simulation selves too. It'd be great not to have to wait for Matt and Keith to catch up with me all the time.
The skyscraper comes to an end at nearly sixty stories and I am launched into the air with the speed at which I was running as my only form of propulsion. I automatically shift into glide mode, my arms thrust out in front of me like a modern-day, female superman. Flying is one of my favorite activities (besides shooting Zin, of course) but it does have its downsides, the most recurring of which is the fact that it leaves entirely too much time for me to be all alone in my own head. Nowadays I hate thinking. Whenever my mind wanders I start to remember that the world's been blown to bits, that most of my friends are still trapped in Zinyak's simulations, that Matt is this close to me and I can't even reach out and touch him. This time, though, I find myself thinking of Johnny. Kinzie keeps telling me not to get my hopes up, but how can I not? He's the closest thing to family I've got left. The person trapped on this plane simulation I'm heading to has to be him.
I land in front of the Broken Shillelagh within two minutes and am unsurprised to see CID already here, waiting for me. He moves over to me and I find that I'm so nervous I start babbling about something I really couldn't care less about.
"It's kinda weird Zinyak hid all this inside the Broken Shillelagh again. I get the feeling he's not that creative."
"According to Matt's data, all the sub-matrices are inside Broken Shillelagh's." my robotic ally informs me. I feel my heart thud more painfully at the mention of Matt's name, as it always does.
"That's stupid." I say petulantly. CID bobs a bit erratically beside me and I imagine that he'd be rolling his one eye at me if he could.
"Zinyak's big on reuse."
I let out an angry huff, annoyed, and turn towards the door that would normally lead into the Broken Shillelagh. All that stands between Johnny and me now is a doorway filled with brightness.
"I'm coming, Johnny." I whisper. And I step into the light.
My hands rematerialize before any other part of me and I stare at them as I wait for mobility to return to the rest of my limbs. They are scarred and lightly freckled from the sun, rougher and less feminine than I want them to be despite my painted nails. It's hard to admit, even to myself, that I sometimes wish I could be more human. When I was younger I worried about things like boys, clothes, and pimples just like any other teenage girl. Some days I miss that. When I glance up and realize that I'm in the cargo hold of a very familiar plane however, I find that today is not one of those days. If I hadn't joined the Saints, I'd never have met Johnny Gat. As it is, I don't see as much of a point to a life without some part of him in it.
Out of nowhere a red and gray clad Morningstar agent rushes at me and I thrust my hand out to hit him square in the jaw, counting on my super strength to be enough to kill him. He's down with one punch as expected, but he's still breathing. My powers are gone.
"Where the fuck are my powers?!" I demand from no one in particular. I'm not sure my already frazzled mind can handle anything else going wrong.
"Your powers only work in your simulations," Kinzie's voice sweeps through my mind, "You're on your own."
Upon hearing this, I take a deep breath. My powers may be gone but at least Kinzie and Matt are still watching out for me the way they always have been. I can do this. I pull out the only gun I have on my person and shoot a single bullet through the head of every Morningstar agent in my path. The plane shakes and rolls as I walk, but my aim is always on point. Nobody can stop me from reaching my best friend.
I get through one door and then another before I reach a section of the plane that holds nothing more than a few dining tables and some comfortable looking passenger seats. This must be the first class cabin. Three Morningstars ambush me here but I grab one without much difficulty and use him as a human shield until I gun down the other two. I snap the neck of the man in my arms without a hint of regret. When I try to knock open the final door between me and my destination, I find that it's blocked by something.
"Kinzie, help." I demand, "The door won't open!"
"I-I don't understand…" she trails off, clearly just as surprised as I am. When I walked into this simulation, locked doors were probably the least of her worries. Suddenly another, far more annoying voice rings out in my head at such a high volume that I have to cringe.
"Is something the matter?" it's Zinyak, and he's faking sympathy, "Poor Johnny is on the other side of that door and you can't even muster the courage to open it."
I cover my ears with my hands as if the action will help keep Zinyak out of my brain and begin kicking at the door in front of me rather frantically. My heart is pounding out a jagged rhythm and I can do nothing to appease it but this. Unaware of my plight, Zinyak continues to speak.
"He's going to die. Alone."
More kicking, more panicked heartbeats. I'm not sure how long I can keep doing this before I truly lose my mind.
"And none of his friends will even get to see the body to-"
"Shut up!" Matt's voice cuts the Zin overlord off. This surprises me enough to force me to stop trying to break down the door.
"Matt, what the hell?" Kinzie demands, "Just a few more seconds of that yammering and I could've cracked some of his coordinates!"
I straighten up and, trying to ignore the shouting of my two handlers, try the doorknob again. This time it twists open without much effort at all.
"Did you not see what it was doing to her?!" Matt says scathingly, "I don't give a fuck about his-"
"Shaundi?" I say, my voice almost a whisper. It seems as if I've found Johnny Gat, just like I'd thought I would, but he doesn't look any more alive than he did in the nightmares I used to have about him. Shaundi, however, is very much alive. She's kneeling in front of his body in Loren's seat, crying.
"Johnny, I let you down. I let us all down. We never should have ran, we should have stayed and fought but we couldn't because-" she breaks off the apology to stifle a sob, "Because of me. Everyone says its not my fault but if the Boss didn't have to protect me you would be standing here right now."
There's a pause and I take a step forward, wanting to alert her to my presence. She places her hands on Johnny's chair and shakes him just slightly, almost as if she's trying to wake him up.
"I'm so sorry, Johnny."
Never in my life did I think that anything would be so painful for me to watch, and I'd singlehandedly coaxed Johnny through the aftermath of Aisha's death way back in Stilwater. In some part of my mind I recall that I came here to find him and that I should be disappointed that it's Shaundi I've run into instead, but I'm not. I'm just overwhelmingly glad to see her.
In a fraction of a second, the nature of the scene we've found ourselves in changes from merely melancholy to entirely horrifying. The body of Johnny Gat reanimates and falls upon Shaundi, evidently trying to take a bite out of her shoulder. I sprint forward, desperate to get to them in time to save her, but it turns out that she doesn't really need to be saved. She shoves zombie Johnny away and he lumbers, uncoordinated, until I ram into his shoulder. Shaundi takes advantage of his confusion and stabs him repeatedly in the head with a knife she'd ripped out of her waistband until they both fall to the floor. Johnny's body goes limp again and she collapses beside it, tears still streaming down her cheeks.
"It wasn't your fault." I say reflexively. I feel the urge to hug her comfortingly or something, but I've never been very good at dealing with people when they were crying.
"We left him to die!" she snaps, wiping furiously at her eyes with the back of her hand. I push my too-long hair away from my face and sigh.
"He didn't save our lives so we could feel sorry for ourselves, Shaundi."
"I hate to interrupt this touching moment," I can hear Zinyak again, "But we haven't even gotten to the best part of this plane ride."
Shaundi pushes herself into a standing position and whips out her knife, leaving me to do the same with my gun. The tear-tracks are still glistening on her face but she looks different now. Angry.
"Oh, fuck me." she says under her breath and I silently empathize with her frustration. Before I can answer in any way, though, she's gone. Zinyak has opened up one of those glowing doors at her feet and she quickly tumbles in.
"I'm coming, Shaundi!" I yell, leaping after her. The next thing I feel is a sharp pain originating from the center of my face as I collide with a surprisingly solid floor. Zinyak closed the portal. I press my palm into my face, trying to soothe the ache, and realize that my virtual nose is probably broken.
"Fuck." I mutter, forcing myself to stand up. I'm out of options; it seems that the only path that leads away from this wretched room is the door I entered from. I ignore Zinyak's laughter and, after questioning Kinzie about Shaundi's whereabouts, realize that I'm alone in this. Nobody is going to find her for me.
I try to make my way back to the cargo hold but the scene before me is shimmering and broken; the hallways that were so short before seem endless now and the room I can see through the door looks like a checkerboard. Square bits of the floor are missing entirely and the only thing I'm really sure of is that I wouldn't like to fall through into the emptiness. I have to hop my way through one lengthy hallway, and then another, before I reach anything substantial. The entire time I can hear words floating to me out of nowhere, conversations between Shaundi and I about her insecurities. It bothers me to remember that she thinks these things about herself. When I push my way through the door that should lead into the cargo hold, I find that I'm in a vaguely familiar club instead.
It doesn't take long for Kinzie to tap back into the network of my brain. After we get through our initial shock, I try to work out where exactly it is that I've ended up.
"I've been here before." I tell her. I can almost see her and Matt exchanging a doubtful glance as I admit this.
"It's Shaundi's nightmare, Boss." Kinzie reminds me. I shake my head, unsure of how to answer, and go back to searching for my lieutenant. This place clearly has multiple floors and the one I'm currently on looks like it would normally be a bar, but right now the only people here are...blow-up dolls? Jesus Christ. I try to avoid touching them as I catapult myself off the side of the staircase.
When I land I'm almost certain that this is not, in fact, Shaundi's nightmare, but mine. Veteran Child is holding her against her will with a gun in his hand, its barrel pointed right at me. I'd think I was experiencing deja vu if I wasn't sure I'd literally been in this exact same position seven years ago.
"Cut it out!" Shaundi attempts to kick her captor, but he steps nimbly out of her way. I'm shocked to see that she too looks the way she did back when this all went down for the first time. Her hair is in dreadlocks and she's wearing that same purple tank top she used to have on all the time.
"You're not going anywhere." he practically growls. I almost want to laugh because this stick-skinny pothead thinks he can keep her away from me.
"You should probably let her go." I suggest, deciding that it would be polite to warn him just once. We've been through this before. I won last time and, if history is anything to go by, I'll win again today.
"Yeah," he scoffs, only tightening his hold around her neck, "Like that's gonna happen."
I shrug idly and run in an arc around him, knowing I can pry Shaundi free if I distract him long enough to use my stun gun. Eventually I'm successful and this younger version of Shaundi manages to pull out of his grasp.
"That is not Shaundi." Kinzie says adamantly.
"Trust me Kinzie," I disagree, "It is."
"No, something screwed up! Shaundi doesn't look like this. She's got like, one emotion: pissed."
I turn to hand "past Shaundi" one of my guns and she gives me a knowing smile.
"This girl needs a bowl fast."
An unbidden grin creeps across my face. I love Shaundi now, but I can't deny that I sometimes miss her younger self's easygoing nature. It doesn't take too long for Zinyak to recreate Veteran Child, though and set him back in our path. I shoot at him, almost habitually, but just as this first version of him dies, two more appear. Kinzie eventually works her computer magic and gives me something she calls a disintegrator to get rid of the hideous Veteran Child(s). After that I have to go through the extremely traumatizing experience of watching present Shaundi separate herself from past Shaundi and berate the latter for being as lax as she is. In the end, it's only when I finally get the physical and current Shaundi back on our physical and powerful ship that I can finally breathe a sigh of relief.
"Fuck!" Shaundi curses almost immediately upon coming out of the changing room. I watch, slightly amused, as she kicks at one of the computer consoles in the hub room. Matt and Kinzie don't seem to share my glee, they merely look after her with alarm apparent in their eyes.
"What's going on?" Matt is the first to say anything. He always was braver than the others gave him credit for.
"Shaundi doesn't like who she used to be." Kinzie explains turning back to the computer screen. Shaundi tugs at the end of her ponytail, clearly exasperated.
"Nobody likes who I used to be!"
She drops her hand and moves across the room before flopping unceremoniously into one of the ship's many wheeled chairs. After a moment I follow her, reaching out to place a comforting hand on her shoulder.
"I do, Shaundi," I assure her with a gentle grin, "I've always liked you."
It takes a minute but Shaundi eventually gathers herself up enough to smile back at me. When she speaks, I can hear a hint of sarcasm in her tone.
"That doesn't sound like you. Did you steal that line from someone else?"
Furtively, I glance back to where Matt is seated, leaning over his keyboard once again. I know what Shaundi's getting at, but I'm not about to just go along with it.
"Don't know what you're talking about," I deny, my tone a little less jovial than it was before, "That was all me."