CHAPTER 19

The first thing Lee became aware of was several voices talking in a soft tone. Why was he in bed with these people hovering around? By the way the sun was shining through the window, it had to be around one o'clock or so. What happened to the morning? Last thing he membered was Dr. Anderson asking how he was handling Chip being gone. The rest was a blank, except for a feeling of being in danger. Trying not to draw attention to himself, Lee slowly moved his arms to reassure himself he was not being restrained. Whatever happened, he had not become violent. He was able to move his limbs freely. The room quieted as Dr. Anderson moved closer and stood over Lee.

"Welcome back, Lee. Do you know where you are?" At the nodding of his head, she continued. "You gave us a bit of a scare, passing out on us."

He blacked out? Lee looked at her in total confusion. He was still groggy, not sure what had happened but relatively calm since Dr. Anderson was there with him.

"Maybe I should leave?" Dr. Harrison offered. "I just stopped by to see how Mr. Crane was,"

Lee's eyes automatically want to the speaker. Things was still hazy but he knew that face, that habit of stroking the mustache. Lee now had a lookof terror in his eyes. Beads of sweat broke out on his forehead as his sole focus was now on Dr. Harrison. He drew back from his doctor. Why had she allowed Frederick near him? Didn't she know what that man had done to him? Lee tried to pull both his hands behind his back; no way was that sadist stomping on them again.

"Calm down, Lee." Dr. Anderson quickly gave Rick an order to bring the laptop and pencil. "Everything is all right. You're safe."

Lee continued to keep his entire attention on the stranger, not daring to release him from his sight. Dr. Anderson continues her gentle assault on Lee. "Why are you frightened by Dr. Harrison?"

The only response by Lee was pulling his legs away, moving as far away as possible in the confining bed.

"You can have all the room you need to feel safe, Lee." The orderly was by her side with the computer. "Okay for Rick to put this on the bed next to you?"

No one made a move waiting for his answer. Lee sucked on his bottom lip, surveying the room, and in particular, one of its occupants. His mind cleared, the remainder of the flashback vanished, and he realized where he truly was. The man Harrison, as Dr. Anderson had called him, wasn't Frederick. He needed to make sure.

Inching along in several hesitant moves, he finally got out of bed. Upon standing, he swayed for a moment, and then found his sea legs. With slow cautious steps, he walked to Dr. Harrison until he stood face-to-face with the other man. He brought up his encased hand and placed it on the doctor's face, turning it to the side. Lee intensely studied the profile then ran his hand over the doctor's chest. His wasn't the round barrel shape he remembered. His legs felt weak but Lee didn't want to return to the bed. That place was for someone sick and he wasn't ill. A couple shaky steps got him to the desk where he dropped into the chair.

Motioning to Rick, he pointed to the desk. The orderly quickly set up the laptop then moved away again.

THOUGHT HE WAS FREDERICK FOR MINUTE

Dr. Anderson took a seat on the couch. "But you realize now that Dr. Harrison is not the same man?"

YES WAS MISTAKEN LINGERING FLASHBACK

"How do you know this Frederick?"

GERMANY

"Is he one of Decker's men?"

YES MY HANDS

The doctor took a deep breath, and whispered to herself, "This is closer to than we'd ever gotten." Aloud, she questioned, "Frederick is the one who injured your hands?"

STOMPED WITH HEAVY BOOTS

"Why? Did you try to escape?"

A REAL SOB

"Did Decker tell him to do it, maybe as a punishment?"

Lee flashed back to those last minutes. He pushed away at the laptop, starting to hyperventilate. He couldn't relive that time again.

"Okay, I think that's enough questioning for now. Take it easy, Lee. You need to slow down your breathing."

Ten minutes later, both doctors had left and Rick was helping Lee into fresh clothes.

At three, Dr. Anderson had appeared for the afternoon session. After several minutes, it was apparent Lee wasn't going to respond to any questioning by her. He had mentally shut down for the day. It would do more harm than good at this point to attempt to explore what had occurred during his captivity.

"It's apparent you're still feeling the effects from this morning. I'll make a deal. You take a walk with me to the common room and back. Then we'll call it quits for the day. So you know, it's double the distance you did yesterday and a little bit more populated. You have been making great strides getting out of your room. In fact, starting tomorrow we'll be meeting in my office. Rick will be escorting you."

NOT READY

"Yes, you are. Each time it will get easier."

NO CHOICE

"You're right. I'm not letting you hide in here any longer. Let's go. Think how proud Chip will be when you tell him how far you went today."

PUSHY

As he walked, Dr. Anderson pointed out a few features of the clinic. Pausing at the entrance to the common room, she allowed Lee plenty of time to check it over. Large windows highlighted the well-groomed garden and lawn. Several people could be seen outside, walking around or sitting on lawn chairs. The room itself had several different areas. One contained six armchairs where one could sit and read undisturbed. There was a 30-something male there now poring over what looked like the Wall Street Journal. There were also a couple couches and some easy chairs grouped together for easy conversation. At this time in the afternoon only four women were taking advantage of this placement. In addition, off to a more secluded side, to allow better concentration, the chessboard was set up and a game ongoing. One player was a clean-cut teen who could pass for a plebe with his bearings and looks. The other was a raven colored longhaired woman with too much makeup and dressed for a cocktail party.

A little bit away, there were tables set up for cards or whatever activity you wished. Inside a glass-sided room was a wall-mounted television, several chairs and three couches. She made sure to point out the clipboard outside the room, 'first come first serve' for the use of the television set. Chip and Dr. Jamieson both told her Lee enjoyed baseball as well as football.

Dr. Anderson was pleased there was some action going on; it would show Lee's there was no danger to him on the other inmates. The doctor wanted her patient to get the feel of the room. It allowed for different diversions without intruding on individual entertainment. The doctor had insisted when she arrived that no laptops or cell phones be allowed in this room; even K.C. was denied the use of her computers.

Lee took his time looking over the room and was a little startled when he recognized one of the women. She was a wife of a four-star admiral he casually knew professionally and socially.

"It's usually more crowded in the evening after dinner. We cater to a good cross-section of professions; some more social than others, just like any other gathering. If you want to play cards or chess, we can work something out. We allow poker, but only for pennies."

Lee smiled, it was getting boring in his room, but he still wasn't sure it was secure enough for him to be moving about by himself. Maybe Chip and he could catch a couple innings of the game tonight after dinner.

He had seen enough and was ready to return to his room. On the way back, a nurse at the station stopped Dr. Anderson; there was a call for her. Before the doctor had a chance to reply, Lee motioned he was all right to finish their walk alone.

Back in his room he lay down, a nap before dinner sounded like a good idea. He had asked Dr. Anderson why he was sleeping so much. Usually five hours sleep, if that, was normal for him. She explained it was an ordinary occurrence, his body's way of coping with the trauma he experienced. For whatever reason, he felt exhausted and soon was sound asleep.

At first, everything was peaceful, almost like floating on the water with waves gently rocking him. As he entered a deeper level of rest, things began to change. Suddenly he was back with Decker and Frederick. The guards were holding down his arms as the butler took great delight in smashing his boot on one than the other hand. Now Decker was leaving him, letting Seaview's crewmen to come and do what they wanted. He pleaded, screaming for help.

Lee tossed and turned trying to escape. His mouth was moving, trying to cry out but only unintelligible sounds were forthcoming. His eyes snapped open as he sprang upright when he felt hands on his shoulders and heard his name being called.

"Lee. Lee, wake up."

Blinking his eyes as he tried to focus, Lee turned his head towards the voice.

"It was just a bad dream. You're safe."

With Chip at his side, Lee shook off the remains of the nightmare. Leaning slightly against his friend's chest, Lee took a couple deep breaths. He realized someone else was also nearby, he could hear the sound of water running in the head. K.C. appeared with a towel and wet washcloth.

"Why don't you get a dry T-shirt, Chip?"

K.C. wiped Lee's sweat drenched face, and then pulled the perspiration soaked top over his head. Before Lee could react, she washed and dried his chest and back before putting the fresh T-shirt on.

"There, I'm sure that feels better. I've got something you'll like, a nice glass of hot chocolate. Chip and I have been enjoying a cup and getting to know each other." She was rambling, allowing Lee time to pull himself together.

Chip moved the tray in place as K. C. filled the mug with the soothing drink, topping it with a generous dollop of whipped cream. After placing the glass in front of Lee, she put in the straw. Refilling the other two cups from the carafe she started to put the cream on top of Chip's when she heard a strange sound.

"Mmmmarsh…." The rest was impossible to understand. Her head swiveled towards Lee. Chip was already staring at him. Lee coughed, swallowed and tried again. The voice was hoarse and gritty but audible.

"Marshmallows … Chip prefers … marshmallows."

Lee dropped his head, pretending to concentrate on drinking his hot chocolate. In reality, he didn't want his friends to see the tears in his eyes. He could talk again!

K.C. first checked for messages on her three cell phones she had placed on the table by her chair, and then commented in a nonchalant tone.

"I'll remember that for the next time, Chip."

"Hey, I can't help it if I have a sweet tooth." He too was attempting to downplay what just happened. After a couple of minutes of silent drinking, K.C. asked a question.

"So Lee, are you escorting me to dinner tonight? I read filet mignon is on the menu. I can reserve a secluded table if it bothers you being seen getting help eating. Of course, you can order a bologna sandwich if you wish."

The grim expression on her face told him her feelings about that choice of food over the prime cut of meat. Lee's voice came closer to normal this time, with just a bit of huskiness in his tone. "How… can I… refuse?"

"Fine, I'll make the reservation and have someone come and pick up this tray. Dinner is at 6:30. I can't wait to see Barbara Hawkin's face." She let out an undignified giggle. "I'll take two good-looking commanders over her stodgy admiral any day."

The two men watched as the spry septuagenarian left with a grin on her face, already primping her hair.

"Should I call Dr. Anderson and inform her?"

"No, Chip… she'll be by." There was some hesitation as he formed his words. It felt strange to have his voice back, unsure if it would keep working. It was almost as if walking for the first time after removing the cast from a broken leg.

"Of all the first words for you to choose from, marshmallow!" Chip laughed, unable to hold back any longer.

"Had to… take care of… my brother's… cravings." Lee joked then turned serious. "How's Seaview? Got… the glitch in... the computer… fix?"

"Hey, I'm good, but only been back for a day. Nevertheless, yes, with O'Brien and the techs helping I think we got it straightened out. We're lucky it happened in port."

"Good… Now do me… a favor." Amazingly, Lee didn't react to Frank's name, it was as if he didn't notice Chip's slip of the tongue.

"Sure, what do you need, Lee?"

"A real shirt… No T… for dinner… Got a date."

He hoped he would be able to stand being around so many people. Having Chip and K.C. as a buffer would help. He nodded his approval of the light blue short-sleeved button down shirt and a pair of navy pants Chip selected from the closet.

"I know you like older women, but don't you think you're pushing it a little with Dr. Carter?"

"Very funny.… I remember... Someone called Ingrid... 50 and that... wasn't just... her bra size." Lee's spirits were lifted. It was wonderful to tease around with his best friend once again. "Call Rick. I… need a shave."

Dr. Anderson found Chip and a freshly shaved and dressed Lee sitting on the couch waiting for their date. K.C. had barely returned to her room before calling the doctor and given her the fantastic news.

"I hear you're eating out tonight. They do a great job on steaks."

"Can't let K.C.… down. She wants to… show up Admiral.… Hawkins's wife."

The doctor gave a delightful laugh. "They are both repeat patients and there is a bit of a rivalry between them. Now, I checked and you have a table for four that have some tall plants around to ensure your privacy. Rick will be there to help you, Lee. I want you to look around. There are a few other patients who require assistance during their meals; you're not the only one."

"I just feel like… people stare… I'll get use… to it."

"That's the spirit. Now for the important question. Marshmallows? I had a list of things I figured would be your first words, including "get the hell out," but never marshmallows."

"Next time I'll… yell Eureka." Lee could tell the doctor was very pleased.

"Don't even joke about that, Lee," Chip pleaded.

Dr. Anderson left after commenting tomorrow's session should prove very interesting.

Dinner started a little uneasily for Lee but he noticed another diner with a nurse assisting him. It relaxed Lee some, especially since the table was indeed secluded. It did make it easier with Rick attending to his needs and not his XO or a Nobel Prize winner. The conversation stayed on general topics and by the end Lee knew he would have no trouble returning tomorrow for breakfast, even if it were just with Rick.

Arriving promptly the next morning, Lee sat down on the leather chair crosswise from Dr. Anderson's seat. Other than greeting him, the doctor remained silent allowing Lee to check out the room.

"Nice office, very spacious and even complete with 'the couch.' You have restored my faith in psychiatry." He had practiced talking since walking up, and his speech was smooth and normal.

"I still have a few patients who feel more comfortable lying down, plus there's plenty of room to pace if needed. I hear the dinner was a big success."

"It wasn't too bad after a while. KC insisted I have breakfast with her this morning. Thankfully I was able to feed myself."

"She's a powerful force. I wouldn't be surprised if she doesn't get you signed up for the poker tournament this weekend. You've overcome two hurdles, both are big moves towards your recovery. I see you're not hesitating anymore while speaking. That's a very good sign. In some cases of aphonia, a speech therapist is necessary."

"I felt a little rusty having a conversation at first, but with Chip and K. C. pushing, they wouldn't let me be quiet."

"Do you know why you started talking when you did?"

Lee paused before answering, not wanting to explain about the nightmare. "I just did. Guess I couldn't stand Chip's disappointment over no marshmallows. You know, he takes his hot cocoa very seriously," Lee managed to say without breaking out a smile.

"I'm sure he's very pleased for your concern about his taste buds," Dr. Anderson replied in an equally fake seriousness. "However, I feel something else triggered your ability to speak again." The doctor gently probed deeper. "You had a pretty bad dream and made some noises."

"You know how it is, you wake up, you can't remember the dream." Lee fidgeted in his seat, not able to meet Dr. Anderson's eyes.

"Could it have been about Frederick and what caused you to blackout yesterday morning? Dr. Harrison reported you made wounded animal-like sounds at that time also."

Lee got up and walked around, examining the paintings on the office walls, trying to stall the conversation. As he studied one, a large smile appeared on his face. It was a Norman Rockwell painting of the front yard of a country farmhouse where three boys were playing. The one that caught Lee's attention was a five-year-old redhead with a face full of freckles sitting on a rope swing. His overalls were dirty with one knee ripped from horseplay.

"You seem to like that picture, Lee. Remembrance of a happier time, perhaps?" The doctor would give him space before continuing with their original questioning.

"My grandparents had a farm with a swing like that I used to play on. The branch was so thick I thought it could hold-"

Suddenly, Lee was no longer in the doctor's office or at his grandparents. He was back in the dungeon hearing Kowalski's voice. "I want to put a rope around his neck and lynch him from the tree out here."

Lee pressed his hands to his ears trying to block out Ski's words. His own voice trembled as he called out, "Why, why do you want to kill me? What did I do? I don't understand why everyone hates me."