Chapter 21

Chip wasted no time in returning to the Dreyfus Clinic, expecting Lee to be waiting in his room but no one was there. One of the aides suggested looking outside. Lee had been spotted several times spending time sitting on a nearby bench, feeding bread crumbs to a pond full of ducks.

Chip smiled at his old friend. "Well you sure are looking better. How are things going?"

"How the hell do you think I'm doing? I'm going stir crazy!" snarled the dark haired man. Lee got up, walked close to the water, and moodily stared at it. "Think if I asked real nice they would trust me with a toy submarine to play with?"

Chip took a step back, startled at the reception. "Whoa, what's going on? Jamie said the progress reports he is getting are excellent. Talk to me, pal."

Lee kicked some small pebbles into the pond, looking at his hands in exasperation. He couldn't even pick one up to throw. Spying a larger stone Lee reared back and gave it all he had. It sailed across the water and came to rest dead center on a, thankfully, unoccupied bench.

"Two points!"

Lee finally laughed. "Shut up and let me sulk. I'm stuck locked up here and you get to sail the seven seas, figuratively speaking of course."

"No reason you can't."

"What?" Lee looked at Chip as if his friend had flipped out.

"Well, maybe not sailing, but you can get out of here. Dr. Anderson said it's okay for you to have a one day pass. Let's take a drive down the coast and stop some place for dinner. We just need to be back by 2200."

Lee was moving towards the parking lot before Chip stopped speaking.

"Slow down, Lee. You have to sign out at the nurse's desk. There are some rules you have to agree to."

Lee became suspicious. "What kind of rules?"

"Not sure of all of them. There's definitely no alcohol allowed, and I assume they'll remind you about the curfew and stuff like that. But why waste our time talking, just go inside and find out."

In a surprisingly short time, Lee was in the passenger seat of Chip's car, allowing Chip to buckle his seatbelt. Lee sat still as a statue at the security gate, afraid his six hours of freedom were about to be denied. However, the guard simply noted Chip's name and car information and time they left. After a pleasant, "have a nice time," the gate swung open. Chip got onto the freeway and headed south for the nearest exit to Highway 1, a much more scenic road, not really having any particular destination in mind. Lee remained rigid in the seat, his eyes glued to the side mirror.

"Don't you trust my driving anymore? Relax, once we hit the One there will be a lot less traffic."

"Just checking."

"Checking for what - the police? I'm keeping it legal."

"No, just making sure no one is coming after us."

"Believe me, pal, no one is following. You're free to 2200, so sit back and enjoy the view. Like the car? I thought you'd enjoy reading in a convertible. It's Frank's, and I promised to bring it back in one piece."

Thankfully, Lee didn't react to the name, instead he took a deep breath and swiveled his head to check out the cherry red vehicle. "Nice ride, he has good taste in colors," giving one of his trademark smiles to Chip.

Taking the exit, Chip made the left turn and got onto the old highway. They drove for several miles until Lee yelled out, "Here, stop here!"

Fortune was with them, there were no cars close behind. Chip was able to apply the brakes and pull off to the side without fear of getting rear-ended. They were just past Solimar, a small oceanfront community. Parking was plentiful for the surfers who enjoyed the waves on this part of the California coast.

"What's wrong?" Lee didn't answer, engrossed in trying to open the car door. "Hold on. Talk to me, Lee. What do you want?"

"I just want out, Chip. I want to look at the ocean."

Chip hustled around to open the door, all the while Lee acting like a child on Christmas morning. Lee jumped out and strode up to the rocks that formed a barrier to the sand and the beach, enjoying the view of the waves crashing on shore. There were a few surfers in the water, taking turns riding in.

Chip had a laugh as he watched his friend. He could almost feel Lee vibrating with happiness. "You'll be out there again soon enough, Lee. Just need to get those bandages off."

Lee simply nodded his head, taking in the endless motion of the ocean, the sun's rays bouncing off the water and creating a sparkling effect. The wind was strong, ruffling up each man's hair.

"Looks a lot different at this height than 500 feet below the surface."

"I envy you Chip. I miss Seaview. She's one beautiful boat. Maybe I'll be lucky and the Navy will take me back for some desk job somewhere."

"That won't be necessary. I told you I'm just temporarily in charge."

Lee turned and stared at Chip, his smile replaced by a deep frown. "That's impossible and you know it. Nelson isn't going to get rid of the entire crew so I can return. He said he made a mistake putting me in command. I've accepted they all hate me, although I still don't understand how I could have misread everyone. I thought I had everyone's respect."

Chip's mood plummeted. Hadn't they gotten past this? "They do respect you. They want you back."

"Only to hurt or kill me. I'll be safe if I stay away. However, maybe you can let me know how she's doing, from time to time. Don't forget, for some weird reason the outer hatch sticks on Cargo Bay Two when you've been under the ice for a while. I was never able to figure out why. You guys keep an eye on it for your next mission."

"Lee, believe me, Chief Sharkey and 'Ski and the rest, they -"

"I know you and Dr. Anderson are trying, Chip! I just haven't gotten to the stage that I believe you, so please stop!" The look he gave Chip was more of fear than anger. He pulled away and stumbled, but Chip grabbed and steadied him.

"Let's not spoil the day. You want to go down? There's a path right here down to the sand."

It only took a few minutes to get down to the beach. Lee kicked off his shoes and leaned against a large boulder. Laughing, he held up a foot to have a sock removed. Chip grinned back and performed the deed, joking it was time for new Odor Eaters. He rolled up his friend's pants legs and then did the same for himself. Placing the shoes on top of the almost flat rock, they ran to the water chasing the receding surf. For the next half-hour, they were 10-year-old kids, playing in the ocean.

"I'm getting hungry, what about you?"

"You're always hungry, Morton. I'm sure there's a drive thru close by."

"Don't worry, I came prepared. Stop moving so I can get your sock on, will you." Soon they were at the car. Chip opened the trunk and pulled out a large cooler then a smaller one. "Do you want to eat in a car or sit on the hood?"

"How about over there?" Lee pointed to a group of rocks, ready-made for sitting.

"Fine by me. Got cold fried chicken and biscuits plus hunks of watermelon for dessert. I didn't forget to get plenty of napkins. You want Pepsi, water, or iced coffee? Sorry, no beer this trip."

"Pepsi. You're going to have to hold it for me, there's nothing to balance the can on."

"No problem, that's what big brothers are for."

"You're never going to let me forget that I barely made the age requirement are you, old man?"

Using the pop cooler as a base to hold the larger food one, it was simple to lay out the package of chicken and biscuits on the lid, making it easy to serve. It only took a minute for Lee to recognize Cookie's secret recipe. The only reason he kept on eating was realizing the chef wouldn't poison Chip. As the last piece of chicken was eaten, Chip having two for every one of Lee's, and the watermelon thoroughly enjoyed without too much mess, it was time to pack up and return to the clinic.

"Here, give me your hands, you're still all greasy." Chip opened a package of wipes and cleaned first Lee's hands, than his. Picking up all the trash, he returned the baskets to the car, allowing Lee a last-minute look at the scenery.

There was plenty of time to return before Lee's curfew, so with no need to rush, they enjoyed a leisurely journey back on the highway. Lee was very quiet during the trip, a combination of fatigue and the thought of going back to the clinic, Chip surmised.

Once back in his room, Chip left Lee to enjoy a slice of birthday cake the nursing staff had saved for him, and went to find Dr. Anderson to get the latest update.

"To make it short and sweet, Lee disclosed the facts behind his broken hands and suffered a small meltdown. What's encouraging is he recovered very quickly, and even realized what had happened. In addition, he's not overly reacting when the crewmen's names are mentioned. However, he's unshakable in his conviction they mean him great harm if he returns, refusing to listen if anyone tries to question him about this."

"Same thing happened with me. I surprised he actually said Admiral Nelson's name. But he refuses to even consider the guys want him back."

"We knew this would not be a speedy recovery. I hope that when you return from your next trip there is a breakthrough. On the physical side, Dr. Kennedy is taking x-rays tomorrow of Lee's hands to see how they are mending. His ribs seemed to have healed very nicely."

"It will be great when Lee can start caring for himself again. He hates to admit to needing any assistance."

Chip took his leave, promising to return for another visit or two before the upcoming mission on Seaview.

It was time for another session, and this one was not going well. Lee and Dr. Anderson sat across from each other, neither saying a word. The whiteboard was again in use with a couple more pictures added, including Tom Pierce. The doctor finally broke the silence.

"You'd have no problem serving with any of these men on Seaview," she said, pointing to the board.

"None at all."

"What about these men?" She tossed five official photos on the table in front of Lee. He glanced at them, and then looked at her in confusion.

"I don't know any of these men. Looks like they're in the sub service, though, so they'd have the training for it," he said, picking out one of the photos and pointing at the dolphins above the man's shirt pocket.

She took up the first photograph and stared at it. "This is Captain Edward Robbins. Five years ago, he was stationed in Rota, Spain. He got drunk, which I understand was normal behavior, drove his car off a bridge into the water and drowned. He also killed his 16-year-old date.

"The next is Lieutenant Harding. You might actually know him if you thought about it for a while, he was leaving the U.S. Grant as you were coming aboard. He's in Leavenworth for killing his girlfriend because she went out with another guy while he was at sea."

Picking up the third photo, she showed it to Lee and said, "Lieutenant Ford, He's available, very available. Passed over twice for promotion and left the service this year. Many people wonder how he even made it through his plebe year. He got lucky and fooled people for a while, but it finally caught up with him."

"And I suppose the other two are deserters or embezzlers," Lee jeered.

Dr. Anderson chuckled, shaking her head. "No, this very attractive redhead is my cousin. I asked him to pose for this picture. Did a good job, don't you think?"

"What about this last one?" Lee couldn't resist asking.

"Oh, his name is Tom Tyler. That's really a publicity photo for when he had a small part on one of the soaps playing a naval officer. I understand he was quite good at it."

"So all of this was a big joke. Now you are stooping to tricks."

"No, I'm trying to make a point. You refuse to hear one good thing about the crew that has served with you for three years, but quickly agreed these five would likely be okay."

"You know damn well their backgrounds would have been checked and double-checked!"

"Just as the current Seaview crew was checked and double-checked. There's not a man on board who can't be trusted. You'd have dismissed them if anything else was the case."

"Stop it! I do not want to talk about them."

Dr. Anderson pressed on nevertheless. "What about when Patterson was stuck in the flooding compartment? Knowing the hatch would be closing soon, you jumped in. You'd gotten Pat halfway up the ladder when the boat shifted and you lost your balance, hitting your head. He went back into the water and saved you."

Lee quickly tried to refute her claim. "He had to. There were people topside that would call him a coward if he hadn't. He couldn't take the risk."

"You really expect me to believe that? Remember you keep insisting all these men want you dead. If Patterson had just left you, no one would have said a word. Maybe even congratulate him for solving the problem."

"NO! That's not how it was. He had to save me because... because..." Lee turned away. He would not let her suck him in to these lies. "I'm not going to let you talk to me about these people. I can't, don't you understand? Just leave it alone!"

And so it went. The doctor would tell a story leaving Lee no chance but to listen. He had problems even with the funny ones, such as the time the men attempted a surprise birthday party for Chip. The XO kept showing up unexpectedly, the worse being visiting the galley when Cookie was baking the cake. Eventually Lee managed to get Chip off the boat, pleading that he needed Chip in his office to go over some overdue reports, giving the crew time to finish decorating and get a fine birthday lunch together. Chip had been thoroughly surprised. It was one of many times, the doctor reiterated, that all the crew - including Lee - had pulled together to accomplish an objective.

Each time, the story had been followed by the dreaded words, I don't want talk about it. I can't talk about it.

Dr. Anderson continued her assaults. She was slowly gaining some ground. Although he wouldn't relinquish his belief in the men's intentions, he would at times calmly sit while the doctor continued her tales, albeit coming up with an excuse for the behavior. The session had ended without another outburst.

She was now sitting in her office, writing up her notes.

I guess it makes sense, the closer the relationship the more painful the supposed betrayal. I have to call Admiral Starke again to see if I can get those files. If I surprise Lee by attacking Decker, it might break the hold he has on him.

The ringing of the phone interrupted her thoughts.

"Dr. Anderson."

"Doctor, this is Admiral Starke. I'll get right to the point. There's good news and bad news. The bad, ONI refuses to release any files to you."

"Dammit, don't they realize what's at stake?"

"That's where the good news comes in. One of their agents, Art Gordon is back in the states. He was part of the search crew for Crane in Germany. He's got some information for you on Decker, not firsthand intel, but he knows the guy's make up. Gordon has details of Crane's previous run-ins with Decker. Best of all, he's a friend. My question to you, when do you want him? He's in DC waiting for my call."

"Last week." Full of anticipation of what this could mean in her sessions, the doctor quickly made arrangements, emphasizing the agent should stay in a nearby hotel to avoid any accidental meetings with Lee. "I don't want to take a chance Lee would see him, without first exploring his response."

"Right, I'll make a call. He'll be there tomorrow." Starke paused, then in the well-known gruff voice asked, "how's Crane doing, you've got to get that boy back on Seaview. I hate to admit it, but Harry needs him."

On the drive home from the hotel, Dr. Anderson went over what Agent Gordon had revealed. She had a much better picture of Decker; he was what one of her professors called 'really freaky,' truly a sadistic megalomaniac. The fact he was able to intelligently control a large criminal enterprise made him even more dangerous. During their sessions, Lee had commented he had to "believe what Decker said, Decker was right." Somehow, Decker had gained Lee's trust, producing a form of Stockholm Syndrome which meant the sadist had a terrifying hold on Lee, rendering him unable to defy him.

In their session today, she would start reestablishing what Decker was actually like, taking Lee through his first two encounters. She would offer no criticism, no judgment; just bring up the facts of the man's brutality. In that way she might open a crack on the hold Decker had.

Returning to the clinic, she had called Lee to her office. Once again, she tried to talk about the incident with Kowalski. Lee exploded. Screaming and yelling at her, going so far as to knock several pillows off the coach, he had informed her in an almost threatening tone not to talk about that "hangman" again.

Drawing a deep breath, it was time to discuss what Gordon had told her. This had to be a straight on attack.

"Tell me about your first encounter with William Decker."

"It's classified," Lee smugly snapped.

She shook her head. "No, it's not. I'm clear to hear about your, let's say, personal time, with him. I have no need to dwell into the who or what you were after. Therefore, I'll say it again. Tell me about your first meeting with Decker."

With great reluctance Lee recounted his time in Australia, recounting the brutal beatings and interlacing isolation and dehydration tactics that Decker had employed.

"You endured rough treatment at his hands."

Lee was conflicted about answering. He couldn't betray Decker. Hadn't he somehow saved Lee's life from the attack by Kowalski and the others? He had repeatedly shown kindness and concern for Lee while he was forced to torture him.

Kindness? There was no kindness in Australia, only savage beatings and the withholding of food and water.

"Lee? What are you thinking about?"

"He was doing his job and so was I. He needed information. I had to keep it from him." A simple statement of how the game was played.

"So you are saying Decker was justified in his actions."

Lee was becoming more confused. Decker was a criminal. Lee was supposed to stop him. What was he doing defending him?

"You don't comprehend. Germany was different. He helped me, protect me from the crew as best as possible."

"I'm not interested in what happened in Germany right now. We're discussing your time 'down under.' Did he have the right to treat you with such cruelty?"

"You still don't understand. It's not that simple."

The doctor continued to apply more pressure. "I'm just after the facts. You said he would have his men beat you while asking questions. Is that correct?"

"Yes."

"These beatings would continue until you were unconscious."

"Most of the time," he answered in a flat, emotionless tone, unwilling to allow the doctor any insights.

"Then he would lock you up in a windowless room for 24 hours with no food or water. That's the facts concerning the time you spent in his hands, isn't it? Just for some info, some papers, he thought you had?"

"He was trying to weaken me, break me so I would reveal where I hid the papers."

Something inside was making Lee desperate to have the doctor appreciate why these things happened. Finally, he broke down. "What difference does it make now, it was years ago."

Lee got off his chair and began pacing up and down the office. He was having difficulty defending Decker's actions. With each trip across the floor, he was stopping further and further away from Dr. Anderson. Even then, he wasn't feeling safe from her probing eyes and words.

"You're telling me Decker did nothing wrong. He should have handled you that way. He had a right to the information you were keeping from him. You were wrong by hiding it." The doctor's voice became accusing, as if Lee was a criminal.

"Yes … no ... I don't know. You're trying to confuse me. Make me say things I don't want to. Leave me alone. Just stop and leave me alone, please."

"No, I won't stop. I have the right to know what kind of man I am treating. If you keep claiming William Decker had a right to do the things he did, that must mean you are in the wrong. That means you're a traitor to your country. Was that his plan? Surely he told you all about it during your "conversations" with him."

Lee had now backed himself into the corner. Dr. Anderson was out of her chair now, walking towards him. Her skin was slightly flushed and her blue eyes piercing as she pressed forward.

"Well, were you the bad guy? Come on, Lee, it's an easy question. Why don't you answer me?"

Lee pushed past her, causing her to stumble. He didn't mean any harm, he just needed space. He came to a stop behind his chair, firmly planting his casts on the back of it. Lee looked around the room, his gaze coming to rest upon the Rockwell picture. Happy memories of a simpler time when it was the white hats against the black hats. He looked at the doctor, drawing out every ounce of courage he had to defy Decker.

"No. I was a good guy. Decker never got any information out of me. I was rescued before that happened. With that, doctor, I'm done for the day." He went for the door and this time was able to turn the doorknob in an awkward but effective two-handed method and left the office, leaving behind a smiling doctor.