---

five
RETURN

he's there in case I wandered off
he's scared 'cause I warned
he's there in case I won it all
he's scared 'cause I want

all in all the clock is slow
six color pictures all in a row
of a marigold

Marigold, Nirvana

---

Kakashi had found Sasuke.

He had found him in the forest ( which was where it was largely assumed Sasuke always was, but the forest was vast and Sasuke was not new to the arts of self-concealment. Not that Kakashi was new to the art of tracking, either, but they were after all shinobi- combatants in an endless ring where the aim was to outperform the other. The silver-haired jounin simply could not find him, even with the help of the hachi ninken, and decided that by that alone it might be derived that the student had surpassed the teacher. He could not help a small glimmer of pride.

Why Kakashi had always been searching for him, even he was not too sure. Tsunade only looked on grimly and nodded as he spent the little time he had free from the constraints of mission after mission searching for his former student. Ever since Sasuke had ( rather quickly ) attained the rank of jounin, he had vanished off the face of the Earth, even more so than he was before. With this Team 7 rapidly dissolved, Naruto choosing to follow Jiraiya on a several years long training mission, Sakura quickly taking up the opportunity to train under Tsunade herself as a medic-nin. In one part, Kakashi was morbidly curious about two things- one, just how powerful Sasuke had become, and two, if he had thought any better about his ultimate goal of destroying Itachi. In the other part... and mostly, in truth, Kakashi had felt... lonely.

It was something Sandaime had always told him, that he needed to find friends, people to love. It was only because of Sandaime's rather forced request that Kakashi had been pulled from the ANBU- and of all things, given a team of genin to train. At the time, Kakashi had rolled his eyes and taken to the task with a half-hearted air, sarcastically talking to himself of how the task aimed to open up his wounded, lonely heart. Now- and especially after Sandaime's death- Kakashi had to thank the man. It had done something, after all.

But not much. Naruto had grown under his guidance, but under Iruka and Jiraiya as well, and Sakura had grown of her own strength and skill ( under her mentor's guidance, of course, and yet ). It was Sasuke that he saw himself in- he did not entirely understand, and he knew no one really could, but he could somewhat empathize with the Uchiha's pain and then-near-obsession for revenge. When he saw the three of them, it reminded him painfully of his own past- but rather than running away, as he had been so accustomed, he seemed instead determined to save them from a similar fate. Especially the one in which he saw the same potential that he had- the potential to make a deadly mistake.

And for all that, he thought bitterly, He only became more obsessed.

Sasuke's fixture on Itachi had went from constant desire at the back of his mind, to single-minded drive, to his very purpose for living. And Kakashi had tried to save him from the darkness- sealed away Orochimaru's cursed seal, trusting Sasuke to make the right choice... and he shouldn't have, and he still berated himself for the mistake, he should have talked to him more. Made him understand. And in the end, Sasuke had still fled in favor of Orochimaru's promise of power- and even though he was here now, it was not of his own choice. The Uchiha stayed because he did not want to be too pathetic, Kakashi understood that much... but either way, what did Sasuke's presence do, if his sole purpose in life was still to maim and kill someone he once held dear?

And all he could do was watch him, and Kakashi was failing at even that.

Shikamaru,Kakashi thought idly. Somehow, someway, Sasuke saw something in the lazy chuunin. Kakashi had never disregarded Shikamaru, but never paid much attention to him either. He simply could not see what Sasuke would be so drawn to, so fascinated by- and that alone was some form of fascination. He was intelligent, very much so, and none who knew him would deny it. He did not care about the world- never initiated anything and shirked everything as much as the laws of reality would allow- and then some. Kakashi knew little of the chuunin- knew little of his own student. He was... annoyed, at this lack of understanding, annoyed when he realized that now ( it had been some time since his last Jounin mission ) his preoccupied mind was taking to puzzling over random shinobi and their daily personalities.

He chuckled darkly to himself. So this is what Sharingan no Kakashi has become.

People saw him... differently now. Still as a powerful ninja, distant and mysterious- but also unpredictably endearing, eccentric, merciful, kind... wise. A worthy advisor. A worthy teacher. Even now, after he had tried to change himself for his team ( for Sasuke, he knew, but did not say )... he wasdifferent. He could not deny it. But he could not forget the ruthless killer he had once been... and sometimes, he missed it. Sometimes the thought that that side of him was still lurking, waiting to emerge, scared him. Other times, it made him feel glad.

They were shinobi, after all, born and bred killers, every one.

It was something Sasuke had brought up to him before. What are we, if not ninja? The then-genin had demanded of his teacher ( Sasuke had never been one for respect ). What do we do, if not kill? I am an avenger. I am a killer. And I willhave my revenge.

And in the forest, Sasuke had been waiting.

The only time Kakashi had ever seen Sasuke, indeed the only reason why he didn't think Sasuke had simply ran off again, was that sometimes, he would see him. Lurking in the old Uchiha houses. Moving quickly, through the crowds. There were times when the copy-nin simply ran into his former student in his training, but all he could ever bring himself to say were low, mocking drawls, a cold imitation of how Sasuke treated the world. He wasn't sure what he should be doing, otherwise. For Kakashi to have actively looked for someone was already different. What should he be doing? Showing concern?

He shrugged mentally. Kakashi was never bothered by social niceties. He would do what comes to him, at the time.

This time, though, it didn't feel like an accident. It was almost as though the only reason he caught the scent, the only reason he found the younger jounin, was because Sasuke lethim.

That, of course, led to the rather meddlesome question of why.

He did not pretend to know Sasuke well enough to guess ( and that he did not try may have been proof that Kakashi knew more about him than most ). He concerned himself, then, with what didhappen.

Kakashi wasn't quite sure what to expect, when he found Sasuke...

Sasuke was just sitting there with Kakashi first caught a glimpse of him through the foliage. His instincts told him to stay hidden and observe- but it was not long before Kakashi noticed that Sasuke seemed to be... waiting. That he had probably not only been noticed, but expected. Kakashi wasn't sure how to handle this properly- but then he never cared for the proper way, regardless. He hopped down the tree and emerged in the clearing opposite from the Uchiha, raising a hand in a cheerful salute- although Sasuke's eyes were closed. "Yo," he greeted.

Kakashi studied Sasuke's unchanging posture. He was seated on a fallen tree trunk, his elbows on his knees, fingers laced together, obscuring parts of his face that his black bangs did not. He could make out closed eyes, though, and an unchanging expression that was quiet, contemplative. If he didn't know better, he would've guessed the younger ninja was meditating.

"I was wondering when you'd come." Kakashi was somewhat taken aback by the reply. Given most of the conversations he'd had with Sasuke, he had expected at the very least a much longer silence. "I haven't bothered to conceal myself for days, now."

"Being on time has never been my strong suit, Sasuke," he replied casually. And he waited for some hint of why they were there- and there came none, the expression unchanged from before. So, he took it upon himself to ask. "Why are we here, then, Sasuke-kun?"

Kakashi couldsee him bristle ever so slightly in annoyance, but it calmed quickly. The reply was something he hardly expected- and what's more, it sounded so disturbingly genuine, unlike Sasuke's usual veiled, barbed comments that dripped with cold malice.

"I don't know."

He had never known Sasuke to be uncertain, to be insecure. Maybe deep down, but on the surface, nothing... and if he was expressing inner insecurity, why now? Why to him? Kakashi frowned- and something occurred to him. Even if he was confused, something had always driven him- there was one thing he was always sure of, one thing he always knew he needed to do.

...could it be?

"That's different," Kakashi replied, with a casual, aloof air. He sounded almost bored to be there.

"You've been chasing me for so damn long," he heard Sasuke snap. He looked up and saw a Sasuke he recognized- older and stronger, certainly, but still the same power lurking behind his now-open eyes that gazed intently at his old mentor. "You must have something to ask me." Kakashi watched his muscles tense- in anticipation of... some kind of a reply?

There was no way Kakashi was admitting to anyone that he had just felt a little like a lonely old man. He lied, of course- it came naturally. "Yes."

The old jounin saw shoulders droop slightly, muscles relax- but they tensed again once he spoke the next word. "Shikamaru."

Slowly, surely, with an air of a heavy wildcat's deadly grace, Kakashi watched as Sasuke pulled himself upright. He even looked stronger than he used to be. Sasuke strode slowly, calmly, straight to his teacher's side, always looking past the copy nin, never looking him in the eye. When Kakashi heard him settle next to him, he could almost feel it. An aura of almost-intimidation that instilled, even in him, a sense of almost-fear.

"What about him?" The question came in a low, familiar draw.

The question was simple. "Why?"

The answer, of course, was not.

Kakashi could almost feel Sasuke hesitate behind him. "What did he tell you?"

"Nothing," Kakashi said simply. "I know what I know."

He felt Sasuke moving again, further behind him, towards the edge of the clearing, the trees. It was clear, at that point, that the conversation was over, and that Sasuke had no intent of giving answers- and whatever he had waited for, he was willing to put aside. Kakashi tilted his head ever so slightly so he could see the receding figure from the corner of his eye, as he called out, "Shika-kun wanted to know why, too."

His sharp eyes caught Sasuke pausing at the very forest edge, leaning his hand against a nearby tree. The hesitation was clear, and Kakashi fancied he could see a ghost of an answer forming on those pale, pale lips- but a moment later he was gone, vanished into the forest and the shadows.

Playing through the memories in his head, he realized that this must have been difficult, for someone so logical as Shikamaru. So many questions. Too little answers. Hardly anything to analyze and try to understand- so little to go on. Kakashi, however, was far more concerned about Sasuke.

Sasukehadbeen his student, after all, and he still had some responsibility for the boy. And despite everything, at least Shikamaru had people to turn to. At least Shikamaru had friends.

---

"What is it, Ino?"

Sakura bit down the insult that came to her lips- her rivalry with the blonde kunoichi was fierce, but their friendship was stronger. Their bickering and arguing had hardly reduced over the years, but their friendship had only grown stronger. Moments like these were rare, and Sakura knewthat if Ino was asking for help, it had to be bad.

The Yamanaka family shop was a pleasant place to be, Sakura had always thought. They were in a room in the back, now- one of the features of the shop house. Aside from the small store room, there was also a room where they kept some flowers, a couch- it was a room where they went to rest without having to go up to the house. Sometimes, Ino told her before, customers are idiots, and getting away from them is a necessity.

They sat on the couch, and Sakura could smell the mixed fragrances of various flowers mingling pleasantly in the air- she would've enjoyed it more, but Ino, sitting next to her, supported her chin with her hands, face creased in worry. And whatever it was…

"I'm worried about Shikamaru," Ino said finally, with a small sigh.

Sakura frowned slightly. Ino had told her a little, a few days before, (Sakura was sure she knew more, Ino could always pry information out of anyone) of how Shikamaru was having… relationship issues, with a certain someone. Ino wouldn't tell her more, and the pink-haired kunoichi was somewhat surprised. Ino, holding back from gossip? Even she can be trusted sometimes, then. But was it really something to be worried about?

"I'm sure Shikamaru can take care of himself," Sakura said.

"He was wounded…"

"Badly?" Sakura asked, alarmed. She hadn't heard of that.

"No," Ino said quickly, shaking her head. "Small scratches. But…" Ino frowned.Marigold. Whoever it was Shikamaru was fighting off… could he be hurting him?"I think whoever it was might be actually hurtinghim!"\

"Did Shikamaru tell you that?"

"No, but-"

"Then there's really no need to worry, Ino."

"I know!" Ino snapped- there was some of the fiery temper Sakura knew. "But I can't help it! He did tell me. Not… not exactly, but-"

Sakura sighed as Ino talked- this language of flowers thing again. There was too much to be read into it, unless Shikamaru was manipulating the blonde kunoichi or something, but there was no way he would do something like that.Shikamaru didn't need to be worried over- he had a good head on his shoulders, even if he was a lazy oaf. There was no way he'd get himself in any sort of serious trouble- and even if he did, he had enough sense to ask for help, not poke around flowers. Sakura was sure that Ino was overly concerned, and really, it wouldn't do her any good. So what else could it be? Something to take Ino's mind off it…

She threw a wild guess.

"Maybe he was just trying get your attention or something. "

"What!?"

"Maybe you're jealous!" Sakura grinned. On the off-chance it was true, it was about time she brought it up. If it wasn't, a bit of harmless teasing could always help Ino get her mind off things.

"I'm not jealous of anyone!" Ino argued. She wasn't like Sakura, she didn't latch all her affections onto one person and wait aimlessly for something that would never happen while drowning pathetically in her own sorrow. She had preferences, but she took them as she came. She'd long ago noticed that Shikamaru was sweet, beneath the lazy, uncaring exterior, but she'd long ago realized that Shikamaru wasn't about to go after anyone for awhile, that it was pointless, and she felt no worse for the realization.

"So touchy, Ino-pig," Sakura teased. Inwardly, she did a little victory dance. Ino was so easy to get worked up.

She drew breath for another heated comeback (most likely involving the size of Sakura's simply epicforehead) but only then realized that Sakura was just teasing. Her anger faded and her blue eyes shone cunningly- oh if there was one thing the two of them were good at, it was insulting the other. It was familiar ground. She was feeling better already. But before she could speak, she ended up pausing- blinking, staring at something behind Sakura.

Sakura herself blinked and twisted her body around- and didn't quite expect what she saw.

Shikamaru, looking nowhere near as sickly as Ino had described him, was standing calmly at the door, hands in his pockets, shoulders sloped to one side. He raised an eyebrow at the somewhat unfamiliar sensation of girls gaping at him, then shrugged. Troublesome women.

"Did I interrupt something?" he asks, the corners of his lips betraying a small smirk.

---

On the rooftops, Kakashi waits and watches.

He'd been there since sunrise, and he'd already finished half of the Icha Icha book he brought along. Once and awhile his eyes would raise from the tired pages and search the crowd, find nothing of interest, and return to the familiar lust-ridden words. The thoughts that entertained his mind had little to do with sightseeing orpornography.

He thinks of Sasuke, and their brief encounter- of how he has changed so much, yet not at all, from what he used to be.

"I never wanted to come back."

I know, Kakashi thinks, but he doesn't look up. He'd been here every day for two weeks now, leaping in wordlessly from the windows in the morning and vanishing in the night. Sasuke never saw when he came in, when he left- fatigue, truly, had the better of him during his recovery. Kakashi knew that even if Sasuke somehow appreciated the company, the ceremonial show of obligatory concern from the teacher to the student, Sasuke would never say a word. And so the days had passed in silence, but Kakashi kept coming (waiting for something, but not expecting anything either). It was the first time Sasuke had uttered a word since he first awoke to see concerned faces around his bed, since he mumbled words of confusion that rapidly evolved into curses and screams. Kakashi still wondered if saving the boy was ever a good idea. Kakashi still wondered why Sasuke was still here- because to be honest with himself he'd have expected the boy to flee a long time ago.

"But here you are," Kakashi says, and indeed, here he was. Regardless of his suspicions, regardless of what he had known- or thought he had known- about Sasuke. It occurs to him that he did not know much at all. He watches Sasuke stare bitterly at his hands, flexing his fingers slowly, teeth gritted in irritation. The recovery was taking a long time, and even Sasuke knew that he couldn't leave just yet.

The black-haired Uchiha clenches his fists quickly, his voice bitter. "Only because those blockheads kidnapped me…"

Kakashi studies the sudent's face- as always covered in nothing but anger and hatred. Angry at the world, angry at his almost-friends, angry at himself. "Now now, Sasuke-kun," he says cheerily, showing off his one-eyed smile, "The sound were quite competent."

Sasuke scowled, but was otherwise silent. Sasuke understood, to an extent, that Kakashi's teasing was one thing never to be taken at face value. It didn't stop him from being annoyed by it. Kakashi wondered, for a moment, just how well his student knew him."We almost thought Chouji-Kun was dead for awhile, after all," he added lazily. "And Neji-kun."

Kakashi heard Sasuke mutter something under his breath- it wasn't clear, but it was definitely a curse, and the jounin knewhe had hit a nerve. Perhaps Sasuke could learn after all… maybe he wouldn't waste Konoha's efforts to rescue him. Maybe, just maybe… "They risked their lives for you, Sasuke," he said, tone suddenly serious, bringing his one stern eye to Sasuke's head.

Kakashi watched as Sasuke glanced upward and met his gaze for a fleeting second before turning quickly away. "They were idiots," Sasuke muttered darkly.

"You dare to insult them?" Kakashi knew that his voice was harsh, but since when had Sasuke ever reacted to kindness- and it was a lesson he had to learn, soemthing he had to understand, something that if he understood would hold him from running back to Orochimaru's waiting arms. "You owe them your life,Sasuke! They did not once stop, did not once think 'What's that guy ever done for me'- you were their comrade, their friend, and they came to your aid without hesitation! And this is how you thank them for it?"

"They had their orders," Sasuke snapped- he had shrank slightly from his mentor's anger, but refused to show it, but never turned around to face him, either.

"You think they nearly sacrificed themselves for orders?"

"We're ninja!" Sasuke argued. "Tools. To be used."

"We are also people, Sasuke!" Kakashi's voice level was beginning to rise, his anger rising uncharacteristically- and he wasn't sure why. "We fight for the people we hold dear!"

"And they hold me dear?" The voice was raised to match Kakashi's, mocking, challenging- shaking.

"Believe it or not, Sasuke, people actually care about you!"

"I know!"

Sasuke had turned around and was staring at his mentor, right in the eye, his shoulders rising with each ragged breath. Sweat was trickling down the Uchiha's brow, and that was the first time Kakashi saw it- that thing in his eyes that would come to haunt anyone else who had seen it before. Anger, revenge, obsession- and a twisted feeling of hollow emptyness, of far-off pain, of heart-wrenching regret.

Kakashi stared back, somewhat taken aback. Sasuke's mouth was hanging open- it was as though he was trying to speak, trying but couldn't, and any words he found rose and died in his dry throat. But it was understood. They wouldn't need any words.

Both of them had felt it before.

In the quiet silence that followed, it was Sasuke that broke their gaze, turning away to stare at the opposite wall, head buried in his arms. Kakashi had remained and watched his small twitches and ragged breaths, but not long after leapt out the window without a word.

It felt so long ago, now.

He still wondered if he should've done it… differently.

But Sasuke was still here, still in Konoha, but he no longer seemed like the young genin he knew, teetering on the edge of lifetime of hatred. The present Sasuke felt like one who had already made his choice. But Kakashi liked to think that there was hope… he hadn't left. Not yet.

I wonder what you'd make of this, Shika-kun, Kakashi mused to himself- one way or another, he was sure, Shikamaru had gotten himself involved in the tangle of anger and confusion that was Sasuke. And, of course, since Kakashi had always been involved, they all had their part to play now. Maybe there's more people to this than I thought.

There it was.

In one of his periodic glances from his cherished book, he had caught a glimpse of a flash of raven-black hair. He scanned the crowd again- it wasn't hard to find. People's heads were turning and people were muttering and whispering among themselves as recognition crossed their faces- the figure stalked through the crowd, ignoring the crowd's curious gaze, and people shifted pointedly out of the way, pointing at the symbol they had not seen for years, whispering of the red-and-white fan emblazoned on the back of the figure's shirt.

To think, Kakashi thought to himself, After all these years, Sasuke has finally, truly, returned to Konoha.

---

A/N: My laptop's back! D

But it has no MS Word. I'm using the school comps, but I finally managed to get a chapter out. I'm happy with it, and I hope you guys enjoy it. As always, thanks (and drop me a review/message!).

I should be able to update regularly again soon. I've been able to think the story through, and though I've always known where I was going now I know how I'm going to get there. There will be a sequel, apparently, the way I have this planned out, but nevermind about that right now.

This chapter lacks Shikamaru.

Til next time!