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Again, thank you to everyone who left reviews on my last chapter. I'm excited every time I see that I have a new one! If you are leaving a review and have an account, please sign in before leaving it so that I can send a message back. I really love responding to my readers and getting feedback from them.

I also suppose that I should start listing warnings at the beginning of my chapters now, as Sirius' naughty little mind ran away with him a bit in the last chapter. Really, its hard to control that boy.

WARNINGS: Adult language, themes, and situations. Please follow the age guidelines attached to M rating on the site.

Sirius lay in bed that night, his cheek pounding and his mind racing. It was strange that he was thinking on it at all, really. In the past, hurting peoples' feelings usually gave him the same thrill that infuriating them did.

I was just caught off guard is all. He told himself, not wanting to admit that he might have been feeling remorse.

He tried to lay up long enough to have a talk with Remus when he got back, telling himself that he would inform Remus that he shouldn't be such a sensitive twat, though the thought that something resembling an apology might have accidentally slipped him if he gave him that look again. It was the fear of such an apology that kept Sirius from fighting hard enough to stay awake, and he eventually dozed off somewhere around one in the morning.

Sirius found himself standing in front of his brother's open casket again, staring down at his too-young face. Unlike at his funeral, the sanctuary was empty now, and while it was too dark for Sirius to see the walls of the church, he could see the stained glass windows that towered over him in every direction, their light shining down on him in dozens of shattered colors. He wanted to grab Regulus and shake him so hard his life would be forced back into his body. He wanted to shout at him, demand why he had to leave, why he had to leave him there with their parents. Sirius had never blamed Regulus for being the golden child. It was a title that he never wanted for himself, and that Regulus seemed to manage better than he ever could.

Tears stung his eyes in a way that suggested this was no dream. His stomach twisted and ached and his head hurt from the sheer force of his sorrow. He took the last few steps up to his casket and reached down to touch his little brother's cheek, his heart stopping and a scream catching in his throat as a pale hand flew up to catch his wrist in a blur. Regulus stared at him from his casket, soft, dark dirt beginning to bubble up around him, as though it were being pumped into the casket from underneath his body.

"Come with me, Sirius…" Regulus said quietly, the soil quickly filling the casket around him. "Mother and father wont find you here. You'll be free."

Sirius was gasping for air as he felt the cold sweat saturating his hair and clothes, realizing that he was unable to break his brother's grip. He looked around desperately and saw a sickly green light casting down from a glass window onto three people. His mother and father stood silently, each with a hand on the shoulder of a delicate, womanly figure all draped in white, a veil covering her face and flowers slowly raining from a bouquet that she held. As the white petals hit the ground they turned bloody red, a small rivulet snaking its way toward the still struggling Sirius.

"Come with me, Sirius." Regulus said again, drawing his attention in time to see the soil cover his face, and begin to spill out of the casket.

Sirius began struggling harder, shouting for someone to help him as his brothers arm started to draw him into the pile. He could feel the cool, moist sediments give so his arm could be drawn in, the deep earthy smell surrounding him as his whole body was swallowed up. He could taste dirt as he screamed before he was fully pulled under.

Sirius found himself shaking and gasping in bed as his eyes opened, light shining in from a crack in the curtained window. He was cold and hot and numb all at once, and his sheet clung to his sweaty skin. Immediately he realized that he'd only been dreaming and heaved a sigh of relief, bringing a hand to his face to try and mop up the sweat. The fear he felt dissipated almost immediately, along with the details of his dream, and all he could think of was that his stomach was growling.

Dragging himself out of bed he stumbled immediately to the shower, unable to function in the mornings without one. The water and the smell of soap helped erase the last bits of his dream, and he was humming to himself as he reentered the room some time later, one hand holding the towel around his waist. He stopped when he saw that Lupin's bed was no longer empty. Remus had apparently come into the room quietly enough to not bother Sirius, though he must have been tired, as he was laying on top of his blankets, still fully clothed, even his shoes still on.

Sirius approached the side of Lupin's bed, looking down at his sleeping face, thinking that he looked much better like this. Even though his face was still void of any emotion in particular, it was more relaxed than it usually was. He definitely looked better without that hurt look in his eyes. Sirius grinned a little to himself as he saw Remus's mouth twitch slightly in his sleep. Now that he had the chance to look at him properly, he was less average than Sirius had originally thought. He had good bone structure, a well shaped nose, and good skin with a natural tan, though since he was still in his jacket and pants it was hard for him to admire more than his face. Tilting his head, he saw a very faint white line that was wrapping its way over the bridge of his nose. A very old scar that Sirius had not noticed before.

He felt that bubbling urge in his stomach again that signaled his want to snoop and to investigate. He thought it was clear, though, that he would be unable to find the information that he wanted using the approach he had thus far, and so, telling himself that it was for the sake of learning his secrets, he decided that maybe he should try a gentler approach. Tucking his towel to keep it from falling he picked up the comforter that he'd pushed off his bed during his uneasy dreaming the night before. After pausing a moment, as though unsure if he should be so kind (after all, he may burst into flames if he's too nice), he draped the blanket over Lupin's sleeping form. He almost regretted his show of kindness, though, when he caught sight of his still bruised face in the foggy mirror.

After dressing Sirius made his way to his first meeting with the school's therapist where he would get his entry evaluation and any prescriptions that he might need. The therapist, a woman by the name of Dr. Trelawney. Sirius was quite certain that she needed medication more than he did as she stared at him through her thick glasses, her eyes looking comically large and unblinking as she tried to read his every movement.

"So tell me, Mr. Black, why is it that you…" She paused, as though for dramatic effect, "thought you should take your own life?"

Sirius found himself grinning a little. He always liked this part of therapy sessions, when his new shrink would ask him this particular question. Their reactions to his answers were always so fantastic.

"I thought it would be a really fantastic prank on my parents." He said with a sly smile.

Trelawney just stared at him through her unblinking, baseball sized eyes: not the reaction Sirius had hoped for.

"Surely there is some deep rooted trouble that you're having that led you to do such a thing. I understand that your brother died recently. How did that make you feel?" She pressed.

"I dunno." Sirius shrugged, "Annoyed that I had to take on his responsibilities since he'd quit the game."

Sirius regretted his use of the word game, as Trelawney spent the next hour and a half talking about the deeper meaning of using a word like 'game' to refer to life. Eventually, Sirius just began agreeing with her, claiming that he'd tried to kill himself due to the grief of losing his brother just to shut her up. She informed him that he would be taking several types of medication, though Sirius was not interested enough to listen to what they were or what they would do for him. He was just glad to be out of the stuffy room that had been filled with too much incense. Trelawney had claimed that the incense would help him to relax and open the doors that were blocking his deeper emotions.

As Sirius made his way down for lunch, since he'd missed breakfast, he found his finger tracing the screw that he could still feel beneath his skin behind his ear. He'd been glad that the damage caused by his 'fall' had been dealt there and not to his face.

"Hey Black!" James suddenly appeared beside him, slapping him hard on his shoulder. "Glad to see you made it through the nigh- fuck! What happened to your face?" He asked, turning him to get a better look.

"Oh, this?" Sirius asked, touching his nearly forgotten bruised cheek. "I asked Lupin if he killed Jona because he wouldn't suck his dick. So he punched me."

James looked like he may faint for a second before laughing energetically.

"God damn, Sirius. You really are out to die, aren't you?"

"Well, if self infliction wont work, maybe murder would be fun." He said with another grin.

"You're fucked up." James declared, though he was still smiling. "C'mon. lets get some food, then I'll take you down to find some gear for you. I've been wanting to get you on the pitch all day."

"Ooh, glad to know that you think about me so much. I know it's hard, but please fight the urge to touch yourself when I cross your mind." Sirius teased, eliciting another bark of laughter as they made their way into the dining hall.

As they ate, James explained that Saturdays were club days, and Peter was already off with his chess club. After a few minutes of merciless teasing that Peter wasn't around to counter, they finished their meal and made their way through the halls toward the locker room. Sirius had thought that the school was strangely void of staff. He had expected men in white coats on every corner to keep track of all of the loony boys they were supposed to be taking care of, but as they walked he realized why staff seemed so limited. He started to notice that there were cameras everywhere. At every corner of every hall there were cameras that swiveled around and watched them as they walked by.

"You get used to them after a while." James said when he saw Sirius looking at them. "They figure it's better than having people following us around. They're all about making us feel independent here. It's really not so bad. You kind of forget they're there sometimes."

Sirius just grunted a noncommittal response before changing the subject.

"So you said that you were friends with that Jona kid, right?" Sirius suddenly asked, as though he'd been thinking about it all morning.

"Huh? Oh, well yeah. We played ball together." James said, his voice a little more subdued now. "Why?"

"Well, I had just been thinking," Sirius began thoughtfully, "I know you said that Lupin probably killed him because he turned down his advances, but how do you know that he liked Jona like that at all?"

"You just had to see how Lupin looked at him. It was obvious the way he stared at him, all mushy eyed, like some girl. He didn't exactly try to hide it."

"Soooo…" Sirius continued, a little more cautious now, " How do you know they weren't lovers or something? I mean, maybe it wasn't one sided."

James looked over at him, almost looking personally insulted.

"You wouldn't even be asking that question if you'd known Jona. He was the best footy player I'd ever met. There wasn't a feminine bone in that guy's body. And you should have seen the pictures his ex girlfriend sent him sometimes." He grinned at the thought. "We had to swipe most of them from the mail room since they took them out during inspections, but that girl was raunchy. There's no way he'd go after some guy when he had something like that back home."

Sirius just rolled his eyes. It was clear that James had no idea how appealing another man's body could be, or the fact that you could crave it even after enjoying a woman. He chose not to pursue that particular argument, as he would never really understand it. Instead he grinned to himself, anticipating his reaction.

"So I think I'm going to be his friend." Sirius said, his eyes sliding over to James jus tin time to catch his mouth falling open.

"Whose? Lupin's?" He asked incredulously.

"Yeah." He mused, putting his hands behind his head as James continued to dig for shin guards for him. "I figure it would be the best way to annoy him. I mean, imagine it. He's all wrapped up in this lone wolf, edgy, dangerous persona, and then here I come, wanting to be all palsy with him. He's not gonna know how to handle himself. It'll be hilarious."

"It'll be dangerous." James corrected, not bothering to look at him this time. "Though… it would be kind of interesting to see how he handles it."

"Well I don't care what you guys say, I still don't think that he's as dangerous as you think he is. It'll be fun proving it."

Sirius was in desperate need of another shower as he made his way back up to his room. He and James had lost track of time on the pitch, and even after Peter showed up they left him sitting on the side lines for almost an hour just watching them. They hadn't talked much about Remus after that, though Sirius was reminded of his plans when he opened the door in time to see Remus angrily making his bed, Black's comforter in a crumpled wad on the floor on the far side of the room, looking suspiciously like someone had thrown it there. Sirius grinned as he imagined Remus throwing it in a fit of anger.

"If you come near me while I'm sleeping again, I really will kill you." Remus said before Sirius had the chance to speak, though he didn't even look over at him.

Sirius just chuckled.

"You're welcome." He said as he pealed his sweaty shirt off his toned chest, feeling scandalized and thrilled when he saw a tiny flash of gold as Remus' eyes darted momentarily toward his exposed skin.

"Don't be shy. You can look if you want." Sirius flirted.

Remus did look at him then, though his eyes were narrowed and honed on Black's face, and not his body.

"You disgust me." He said bitingly, not hiding the insult.

"Oh?" Sirius asked, still smiling as he pealed his pants off next, leaving him in his rather tight boxer briefs.

He grinned as he was rewarded with a small downward dart of Remus' eyes before he turned his back on him again. He just laughed a little to himself before going to the shower. While there he went over what he knew and the options he had for the extrication of information he still needed.

Well at least I proved part of the story. Sirius thought to himself. He's obviously interested in guys.

The way that Remus had glanced at him was unmistakable, but it wasn't enough to just know that Remus was likely gay. Being gay didn't mean that he was also a murderer. He knew that he would have to become friends with him if he was going to become privy to any more information. And that means he would have to do something he very… very rarely did.

"Look," He began, now out of the shower and in proper pants, "I'm sorry for what I said last night, alright" The apologetic word stuck to his tongue for a second before he was able to get it out. "It wasn't right of me, and I really was serious when I said we should be friends.

The anger that almost always showed in Remus' eyes when Sirius was around lightened just a little at the apology.

"I still don't want to be friends with you." He said after a moment, though his voice was a little less rigid.

"Come on," Sirius began, smiling temptingly at him. "Would it really be so bad to have me as a friend? When's the last time you had one?"

Sirius felt his stomach tense uncomfortably when he saw a ghost of the hurt he'd seen the night before flash through his eyes, the gold wavering, threatening to dull again.

"Jona was your last friend, wasn't he?" Sirius asked, his voice lower now, not sure why he'd adopted such a gentle tone.

Anger flashed in Lupin's eyes now as he glared up at Sirius.

"I don't want to be your friend." he restated more firmly this time, "And I don't want to hear you talking about something you know nothing about." In two long strides he had his finger jamming against Sirius' chest angrily. "And if you know what's good for you you'll stay away from me and keep your fucking mouth shut!"

Sirius felt that pleasant shiver run through his body as Remus showed him that beautiful anger again, and even his nipples peaked as he felt Remus' warm finger jab at his chest. He grinned in a way that would make most people quake with dread. He saw Remus' anger waver as he caught site of his expression, but before he could draw away Sirius had caught his wrist, pulling his hand flat up against his chest.

"Or what?" Sirius teased deeply. "Will you murder me?"

"Y-yes…" Remus betrayed himself when he stammered and Sirius could feel a small quaking in his arm where he was holding onto him.

"You don't scare me, Remus Lupin." Sirius said, nearly whispering as he leaned in closer to him, wanting to groan when he felt Remus subtly trying to put distance between them.

Remus opened his mouth to retort, but was clearly unable to do so.

"You better get used to me being around, because I'm very stubborn, and I'm going to find all of your secrets, Remus, whether you want me to or not. We can do this the easy way and be friends and I'll wait patiently for you to tell me… or we can do this the hard way and I can force all the answers out of you."

Remus seemed to panic suddenly, his free hand pulling back to slug him again, though Sirius caught him before he could, pulling him up flush against his body now to keep him from escaping. The angry sound that escaped Lupin's lips had a small twinge of fear and arousal in it, and Sirius saw his face flush just slightly

"Let go of me!" Remus demanded, shouting for real this time, and Sirius loved the raw emotion he saw there. It suited this honey colored boy far better than the stony façade he'd put up.

"Don't threaten me, Remus. If you tell me you're going to kill me, you better plan to follow through. I hate liars."

Sirius let Remus go, who was pulling back with enough force that he tumbled back onto his own bed, trying to catch his breath, his face looking like a scared animal that would lash out violently when cornered. Sirius turned and picked up his blanket from the floor. Before he was even standing up straight again he heard Lupin's foot steps and the door closing as he fled. Sirius chuckled and shook his head at his habit of running away.

He's awfully skittish for a suspected murderer he thought to himself before going over and finishing the clean up job that Remus had abandoned.

Sirius didn't see Remus for the rest of the day, and wondered vaguely where he spent all of his time. He found himself laying awake in bed waiting on him to come back again, but this time he was still awake when he heard the soft turn of the key. He cracked his eyes open, but didn't move, not wanting Remus to know that he was up. He found himself grinning when Remus, rather thoughtfully, eased the door shut silently. Sirius was amused by how polite that was.

He watched as Remus tip toed his way into the room, quietly opening his dresser drawer. He threw one more look in Black's direction before turning his back to his bed and pulling his shirt off to change. Sirius was amused by the show of modesty. In the dark he quietly took in his pleasantly narrow build, but found himself a bit shocked when he saw a word tattooed across his shoulder blades. It was too dark to make out what it said, but Sirius would not have pegged Remus as the type to have a tattoo. That prickling feeling of curiosity swirled around in his stomach again, pleased that this boy kept surprising him. He was distracted when he pulled his pants off after pulling on a long sleeve sleeping shirt.

He really does have a nice ass. Sirius thought as he watched him, and then he started noticing more tattoos on his legs, one even trailing in a diagonal line across his ass cheek. He still couldn't make out what they said, but he only just squelched the urge to flip the light on to get a proper look at them. Before he could decipher any of them, however, he'd pulled pants on. Sirius stayed silent as Remus slid silently between his sheets and turned over so his back was to Sirius. After a while all Sirius could hear was the gentle rise and fall of Lupin's breath.

Tattoos… rumors of unrequited love… the murder of his only close friend…Sirius found that the more clues he got, the more uncertainty he had about the situation. He had to do something to keep him from fleeing every time things got uncomfortable. He needed more time with him if he was going to get close enough to learn anything pertinent.

Okay, So the idea of Trelawney being a shrink is one of the funniest things that has ever crossed my mind. When I decided that it would be her I actually laughed out loud at myself, eliciting some funny looks from my roommates. I just couldn't help myself!

I have finally figured out how to add the page breaks. Please let me know if they help with the scene trasitions or if you think they are unnecessary or distracting.

Please visit my poll, as it will affect my next chapter! I'd really love your help to make my decision!