"I…I can't believe this is goodbye…" And then the sound of a blubbery sob. Cari's departure is upon us, folks. And although she may be screaming in fury at being kicked out of the storyline, there's nothing we can do to stop it.

"Yeah…real shame." Sokka mumbled unconvincingly, chewing on a chicken bone.

"It's like you've been with us forever." Aang said kindly, resting a hand on her shoulder.

"Look- I packed for you!" Katara said brightly, throwing Cari's bag into her arms with a little too much enthusiasm.

"We'd better meet again, Cari." Toph threatened good-naturedly, punching Cari idly on the shoulder. Cari, who had been the one crying all along at her departure, smiled a watery grimace and pulled them all simultaneously into a death grip.

"I LOVE you guys!" She practically screamed, apparently not hearing the cracking of ribs and necks, not the mention the groans and wheezes.

"We…love…you…too!" Sokka croaked.

"Yrrrr!" Katara said in a muffled voice, saying anything she had to in order to escape from the crazy wench's clutches.

"Cari? These guys aren't used to your bone melting hugs." Toph said calmly, not appearing under any strain at all. Cari ignored her, and simply squeezed tighter as the tears streamed down her cheeks.

"AAAAAAARRRGH!"

"Cari." Toph firmly pulled Cari's arms away and patted her gently on the back.

"Ok!" Cari burst out suddenly, beaming and wiping the tears from her eyes, "I'm done! See you guys later-oh and Aang? Good luck on the whole...project you've got going there." But the casual charade didn't last for long. She already had Aang in another death grip before any of them had time to blink.

"You next, Toffee!" She sniffed, with a weak smile.

Crunch!

"Miss you Cari…" Toph wheezed. Cari let go of her, and moved over to Sokka.

"Look after her, Tufty." She squealed, and punched him on the arm before grabbing him too. She then moved to Katara.

Silence.

"Take care of yourself, Loopy." She said sympathetically. Katara itched to hit her…just once more. But she didn't want to get caught in the currents of another mudslide so she simply smiled and said: "You too, Cari. Try not to lose your temper on the way, OK?"

Cari simply laughed lightly, before saying: "Let's hope that you can dial down the PMT over time!"

And before Katara could even yell something back, Cari swooped down and kissed her on the cheek, before yanking her into a similar hug.

"It's been real fun hanging around with you, Katara- you're even more fun to argue with than Toph!" She said quietly into her ear. Katara could hardly breathe, and not because Cari was destroying her respiratory system.

"Ta ta for now!" Cari cried, and with one last wave she was off down the mountain side, earth surfing with style.

The GAang watched in awe as she became smaller and smaller, before blending in as one of the specs on the horizon. All became deathly silent. They began to look back on the short week.

Suicide attempts…

Avalanches, earthquakes, whirpools…

A rather chilling introduction to Bitch-Bending…

Scheme after scheme after scheme…

A overdose on sarcasm...

None of them said anything for a long time, until Sokka asked:

"What just happened?"

This is dedicated to my best friend Carrie- it was a hell of a lot of fun. You are my special Harlot and I love you!

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