Pluto chpt. 4

Disclaimer: Still own nothing. I own cats though. Lots and lots of cats. And meth. But that's really none of your business.

Summery: Pluto isn't a planet anymore and all it took for Riley to realize is a late night encounter.

GMW

"I thought about how there are two types of secrets: the kind you want to keep in, and the kind you don't dare to let out." - Ally Carter, Don't Judge a Girl by Her Cover

GMW

Riley Matthew stared at the hand holding hers in shock. She tried closing her eyes, squeezing them tight as they would go wishing the image away. It was a lingering thought plaguing her mind, refusing to leave.

Maya had kissed her.

She couldn't believe it, refused to acknowledge it as fact. It was...it was just so hard to process what happened. It felt as if her world had suddenly sifted.

Last night was a blur. A hazed memory tampered by a mixture of surprise, aniexity, and guiltily pleasure. What had started as a normal altercation moving into a strange new act altogether.

The blonde had snuck into her apartment last night. By no means a rare thing, it was actually second nature by now. Maya was just there. Riley vividly recalled the joy she experienced seeing her friend. At the time she excused her and Maya's behavior on the separation. The intimate exchange between the two that border lined strange even to the closest of friends hadn't even occurred as anything other than normal.

Again, brown eyes drifted down to the hand intertwined with her own. Riley couldn't quite explain how she felt. Holding Maya's hand was supposed to be second nature, the pit forming deep within her gut foreign. Her hand felt clammy, shaking in Maya's grip. Before long Riley's very nature turned, her being starting to shake as well.

She had called her beautiful, what was she thinking? Well, Maya was beautiful wasn't she?

Maya stopped.

Turning back just inches from rounding the corner to the living room, blue eyes looked up into her's. If Riley thought her previous jitters were bad it had noting on the weight settling over her shoulders. The confusion and genuine concern on her best friends face hitting her like a brick.

"You okay?"

It was a simple question. A reasonable concern considering Riley was moments away from a panic attack by just walking to breakfast. For the life of her Riley didn't know how to answer.

How could she possible know how to voice the insane change in their friendship? It was so obvious Maya didn't have a clue what had happened. It was a weighted conversation with too many ways that it could go wrong. How do you broach the fact your best friend kissed you without her knowledge and part of yourself hadn't actually opposed?

Correcting her vision up, Riley just realized her gaze had strayed to a pair of pink lips.

Forcing a smile that she hoped looked convincing Riley's response was clipped, voice tight. "Fine, I'm fine."

A blonde brow rose in question. "Your shaking there Matthews."

She couldn't met her eyes. Not after what had happened, not after seeing those same blue eyes closing as she leaned in to...

Riley brushed past Maya, hand slipping free. "Really," She said guilt heavy in her voice. "It''s nothing."

There was a beat of stunned silence that Riley ignored. She was a coward. Fear gripped her heart, glueing her chin to her chest, eyes not daring to move from the floor. Pushing into the living room Riley ached when it took serval seconds for Maya to follow. The confusion and hurt the blonde feeling screaming out for the brunette to stop and turn back.

Riley wasn't good at this, relationships a painfully awkward affair. The brief disaster that was her relationship with Lucas a prime example at how ill-equipped she was to handle this. The irony that Maya was her guide in these situations wasn't lost on her. Maya was the one that pushed her in the right direction. Always coaching her, leading Riley through the confusing mess of nerves that regularly became a deterrent in Riley's insane life. It was just so hard. The fact Maya was now on the other side, just out of reach, someone that she wanted/needed so desperately to talk too but couldn't; well, it was just too terrifying. This was a friendship ender.

Maya was everything to her. The thought of losing her, it was more than scary. It was horrifying. Crippling. A soul clinching thought that forced the girl in place. She wanted nothing more than to turn to her confidant but she just couldn't.

Taking a seat at the assembled group of family all huddled around the small breakfast table Riley took her usual seat across from her little brother Auggie. Painfully aware of the blonde pulling up a chair beside her own Riley's eyes found the wooden table suddenly very interesting.

Riley's heart was beating so loud, franticly loud she was sure her family could hear it. The evidence of what Maya and Riley had done yesterday, what Riley nearly did this morning, it was written across her face.

Whatever conversation that had been happening before stopped at the obvious tension entering the room. The eyes switching from Riley to Maya in not so subtle fashion were like daggers. Her face burned hot under the scrutiny.

She could sense the questions burning at the tip of her parents tongues. The Matthews family was a very open bunch, virtually every problem or feeling voiced quite loudly for all to hear. But that wasn't what Riley wanted, this was too much to talk about over breakfast.

"What are we having?" Riley broke the silence.

Her mother was the first to break free from the lull. Her stern and all seeing eyes staring down the pair of high schoolers from across the table before turning to her husband.

"Well, I am having a La bagel to go. I have an early meeting at the courthouse."

With that the woman plopped out of her seat snatching a bagel and taking a quick bit as she hugged them all. Lingering just a moment when she reached her Topanga whispered in her ear, "Have a good day sweetie." It was like the woman had peered into her soul. Damn, how did she do that?

Riley tried no to let it bother her. The stares of all eyes constantly looking in her directions were starting to make her nervous and when she got nervous Riley tended to babble. Deciding to beat her unrelenting nerves to the punch Riley stood giving the remaining Matthews a stiff farewell. Not waiting for Maya, Riley all but sprinted out of the house and out the door.

Riley's strides were long, purposely so, feet quickly moving her down the narrow hall way of her apartment building going as fast as she could to get to the train station. The hurried footsteps of the shorter blonde trying to keep pace were like tiny knifes prickling at the back of her neck. Several times she was tempted to look back. Slow down. Stop even. She didn't do any of those things though.

Riley really was a coward.

The short walk to the train station was by no means filled with the usual friendly banter. Maya quietly kept her pace just a hairs away not wanting to close the distance while Riley stayed clamped shut. What was she going to do?

AN: What do you do when you've told your readers you own cats and meth? Go for broke obviously. All reviewers will receive one Meth sandwich. -RRR

Also to Michelle, usually I respond to reviews through messages but as you don't have it I would just like to thank you for your review and there will be more!