For some unexplained reason, Emilia had trouble falling asleep. She tossed and turned in her bed, trying to get comfortable. This went on for over an hour.
"Screw it." She said at last and throwing the covers back, she got out of bed.
Her feet hit the floor softly and she stood, hearing the bed creak in response. Throwing on a jacket over her pajamas, she wondered out into the main hallway. All was silent, it was the middle of the night, her night. She smiled as she closed the door.
"Sleep well." She whispered to her sleeping men. She turned and headed to the turbolift.
"Engineering." She ordered.
The lift took her down. When it opened, Emilia stepped out, walking to the railing where she could see her warp core. Its hum sounded soothing through the floor beneath her. She pressed a hand to her chest, listening to her heart beat in time with each pulse of the core. All was well, no problems as far as she could see.
Satisfied, she turned aft, heading for the shuttle bay. On the way, she came across Scotty. Emilia's chief engineer looked a bit haggard but that wasn't surprising. He'd been working his tail off with the repairs that needed done after Vengeance had attacked her.
The thought of Victoria brought shudders to Emilia. She both hated and pitied the warship. Hated because Victoria turned her back on the Federation and everything it stood for. Pitied because deep down, Emilia knew it wasn't her fault. Victoria had been swayed, used by Khan and Marcus and eventually, her ingrained fighting nature had gotten the best of her. Emilia felt a stab of guilt, knowing that somehow, she could've done more to save her. She wasn't sure what exactly, but she knew that something could've been done. But it was too late now.
"Mr. Scott." Emilia said.
"What are you doing up at this time lass?" He asked.
"I couldn't sleep." Emilia admitted. She knew it'd be no use lying, he knew her too well.
"Me neither. What with all the repairs goin' I haven't had a chance to rest." He said.
"Well get some if you can." Emilia ordered. "I can't have my chief engineer failing on me.
"An' who says I'll fail ye?" Scotty asked.
"I know you wouldn't but get some rest alright, you need it." Emilia replied.
"You're tellin' me to get some shut eye when you're up and wonderin' around yourself?" Scotty said.
"I'll be back shortly, I just feel a bit restless is all." She replied.
He nodded, understanding what she wanted. "Alrigh', but be careful. We can't just turn around and get ya if you fall off." He warned.
She rolled her eyes and continued on to the shuttle bay. Scotty followed.
"The doors if you please Mr. Scott." Emilia asked.
Scotty flipped a switch and the large hanger doors opened. Emilia let the decompression carry her outside where she grabbed onto the outside of the hull before she began to climb up. She felt a surge of exhilaration. It'd been too long since she walked the stars.
Reaching the bridge roof, she stood, taking in her surroundings. The stars swirled by as she cruised along at warp 2. She put her arms out. There was no wind to buffet her but it felt good nonetheless just be standing here. After a few minutes, she sat down, her thoughts turning to Kirk.
Her captain was young, daring and rash but he had proven himself capable of handling a command. He wasn't good with orders though, Emilia would have to check him on that. Only she could influence him enough to actually listen to Starfleet Command. She liked him, she wouldn't admit it just yet but she like Kirk, a lot. Emilia remembered when she first met him. He was a stowaway on board and under the influence of McCoy's drugs but he was charming nevertheless.
She was so angry when Spock dropped him at that godforsaken planet known as Delta Vega. It took all her willpower not to strangle him and demand that Kirk be brought back. A more recent memory entered her mind. When Kirk jumped into the warp core to realign the housings, Emilia had done all she could to go after him. She told him that as the ship's avatar, she could withstand the radiation while he, as a human, could not. Stubborn as ever, he refused and went in himself. He died protecting her.
She watched his last conversation with Spock, unable to move or do anything due to the pain. But her physical pain was nothing compared to the anguish that ripped at her heart when Kirk died. She wasn't aware of saying anything but McCoy later told her that her voice matched Spock's vengeful cry. When Kirk had returned, she'd never felt so happy in her life. She thought she'd glow with it.
Was she in love with him? Now that was a question she had asked herself many times over the past few weeks. Sure, Kirk was an arrogant young man who needed to be taken down a peg or two but he was charming, kind and loyal. He'd never betray Starfleet, or her for that matter. When he asked Spock if she was alright, she saw the look in his eyes. He was concerned for her safety. But this wasn't the kind of concern of a captain for his ship, no this was a different kind of concern. Just this morning, when they were on the bridge together, she saw the look again. Gentle, caring,loving.
Emilia was certain that she loved Kirk and more importantly, he loved her back. Now if only one of them could admit it. It was possible she could make a mistake. It could be she'd misinterpreted his look as something much more simple like the looks Pike gave her, generous and kind but not loving. The chances of her getting it wrong were about 60%.
She shook her head, refusing to let that thought go any further. It was too Vulcan for her taste.
"Don't worry." She told herself. "He does love you, I know it." Her chastising was interrupted by Scotty calling through their communicator.
"Emilia, captain says we're going to warp 5, I suggest you come back inside." He ordered.
She pressed a button. "Understood Scotty. Open the hanger doors, I'm coming in." She replied.
She sighed, taking one last look at the stars. Kirk and her would have the bridge in the morning and then, maybe then she'd tell him how she felt. She stood up and worked her way back down to the shuttle bay, smiling.