Boilerplate Disclaimer: The Disney Corp. owns all the various characters from the Kim Possible series.
69 Points of Articulation
The original Team Go action figures had not been available outside the Go City area. After Shego left the team Hego insisted all unsold copies of the Shego figure be withdrawn from sale. Mego, who handled the small marketing end of Team Go (he would have always been happy to expand into areas like endorsements - but Hego had always insisted it 'wasn't heroic'), stored the case and a half of unsold Shego figures in her old room at Go Tower.
After the Go Team Go cartoon series began Mego began to surreptitiously sell an occasional Shego action figure on eBay at collector's prices. When Shego discovered the remaining figures she confiscated them for herself. When Mego protested she asked him where the money went from the sale of earlier figures. He demanded to know what she meant. While she would never reach Wade's hacking skills the young man had taught her well and Mego dropped the subject.
Kasy and Sheki were delighted to receive an original and, caring nothing for their collectors' value, ripped them out of their plastic cases.
"Did you really have a whip, Eemah?" Kasy asked as she looked at the accessories that came with the action figure.
"I carried a whip sometimes. I was never very good with it. Uncle Henry finally let me stop carrying it because of how many times I hit him with it."
"How many times did you hit him by accident?" Kim asked.
Shego grinned. "I don't think I ever hit him with it by accident."
The second version of the Team Go action figures were based on the Go Team Go cartoon series. Even though the real Shego seldom worked with Team Go the Shego figurine (referred to by the woman herself as, 'big boob Shego') sold more than twice as many as any other figure in the set - and it didn't even come with a whip.
The Kim Possible action figures were never authorized, which did not stop their creation. It did, however, effectively block their sale. The lawsuit brought on her behalf by the firm of Armstrong, Bennett, and Dashwood meant the fine for their sale exceeded any potential profits and kept them off the shelves. Since the trafficking in unauthorized figures crossed international boundaries Global Justice rounded up the Kim Possible figures in Europe also.
Will Du gave 'Jake' Jacobi, the oldest GJ field agent, the job of shredding the Kim Possible action figures. Jake suffered from terminal insubordination and had been busted back to agent on each of the three occasions he made team leader. The old agent probably held Will in even greater disdain than the young man held Jake.
On the other hand, Kim and Jake respected each other. As he watched case after case of the figures ground by industrial metal teeth he wondered if Kim would like some for herself.
"That's the end of them," Jake told the men at the waste plant as another case was ground to plastic chips. "Give me the form to fill out saying they were all destroyed."
"Uh, there's still one box, the one you're sitting on."
"This box? Not action figures. Give me the forms, this job is over."
"But, that's the last case of-"
"It's my lunch box, damn it! Do you want me to sign the damn form or you want to eat it for your lunch?"
Despite his age Jake still sounded threatening. He signed the form indicating all the figurines had been destroyed, tucked his 'lunch box' under his arm, and headed back to GJ headquarters.
Kim bent over the keyboard, doing the paperwork she found the worst part of her job, when a "Psssst," sounded at the opening of her cubicle. "Don't look this way. These were all destroyed this morning, but one box fell off the truck. You don't know where it came from."
"No idea at all," Kim replied, not looking in his direction but recognizing the cigarette coarsened voice.
Exact details of Kim's sexual orientation remained a bit hazy around Global Justice. Her own opinion seemed to be what consenting adults do in the privacy of their own homes shouldn't be anyone else's concern. She never felt comfortable with anyone going into intimate details in the break room or on a mission. But she didn't try to hide or deny anything. Many people knew of her relationship with Shego, but those above her in the chain of command judged her by her effective job performance.
Everyone recognized her as someone who would go far in the organization. She might set a record in moving from a field agent's cubicle to the small office of a team leader.
Betty Director's management style helped. She took the position that as long as employee's relationships weren't illegal, and didn't interfere with job performance, they were of no concern to GJ. She set the standard with her own life. Most agents had no idea if, at the end of the day, she went home to a man, woman, convent, the entire cast of Grey's Anatomy, or slept in a coffin with soil from her home country.
The day after the box of Kim Possible action figures mysteriously 'appeared' in her cubicle Kim brought a Shego action figure from home. Shego stood proudly atop Kim's computer monitor, while the Kim figure - which came with a hair dryer grappling hook accessory - was posed as if climbing the side of the monitor.
Kim could have been quite happy with the little tableau, a reminder of earlier days. On the wall of the cubicle was a framed publicity still of a young Shego, from her days on Team Go, inscribed, "Keep on fighting! Shego." A photo on the desk showed Shego, in her graduation robes on finishing law school, holding a small red-haired girl in one arm and a dark haired girl in the other, and an ever-changing assortment of crayon drawings on the back wall of the cubicle completed the domestic details of Kim's 'Home, Sweet, Cube'.
Or rather, it would have completed the domestic details of the cubicle if people could have left well enough alone. Kim spent a lot of time on missions, perhaps more than any other field agent at Global Justice, because of her amazing success rate. She would have gladly spent even more time on missions, but the nagging pile of paperwork to be completed at the end of each mission chained her at her desk longer than she wanted.
Agent cubicles were open to the world. And when Kim went on missions a person or persons unknown began the practice of posing the Kim and Shego action figures in compromising positions…
And usually had the wrong one on top.
Mostly Kim found it annoying. Sometimes she found a position amusing. And, on occasion, a position proved downright dangerous.
"Okay," Shego panted one evening, "did you buy a copy of the Joy of Sex: Two Women's edition? A couple of the things you've come up with the last few months have been borderline kinky. Not that I'm complaining."
"Well, something like that," Kim blushed.
Shego laughed, "I've got no idea how you can blush at a time like this…"
Two weeks later, however, Shego raised an eyebrow at a suggestion, "I'm pretty sure that isn't even physically possible. Where did you come up with this?"
"Well, someone keeps putting the action figures of me and you that I have on my desk into these-"
"Wait a minute, you're taking ideas from action figures?"
"They look like fun!"
"Kim, their joints can go backwards! There is no way in hell I can do what you're asking!"
"You're out of shape!"
"You're asking the impossible."
"Am not! I can do it, I can do anything."
Kim attempted to demonstrate how the position could be accomplished.
Shego stared in a combination of amazement and lust, "God, Kim, I wish I could bend like that."
Apparently Kim did also. She stopped attempting to have life imitate art after pulled muscles kept her off Global Justice field assignments for a week and a half. After that Kim tried Post-its™ inscribed with the words, 'Do not touch', by the Kim and Shego figures. If anything it made the problem worse. Frequently upon returning to her cubicle from lunch, coffee, or even a bathroom break the figures were moved.
Kim began to grow slightly paranoid on the subject. She might pretend to take a coffee break, only to sneak back and try to catch someone in the act. She left her camera phone on the desk, 'accidentally' open and watched the image from the security of a restroom stall hoping for a picture of the perpetrator. Removing the Post-its™ improved matters only slightly.
Everyone at Global Justice assumed the classification of suspect. Will Du might be jealous of her, Latisha Jackson certainly was. Jake possessed a twisted sense of humor, agent Haskel was pure evil in Kim's mind… Kim started to worry her fears would affect her job. She was starting to look at all the other agents with suspicion.
Kim's promotion to Team Leader came just in time. Once she had the privacy of her own office, no matter how small, she had the option of closing and locking her door while gone. But Kim made one last ditch effort to discover the perpetrator before she moved up and out the cubicle.
It began with a phone call to Wade, describing the problem.
He pondered the problem for a minute, "And what exactly would you like me to do?"
"You have that formula for Professor Dementor's adhesive around - the one that stuck me and Bonnie together?"
"Yeah…"
"Could you do some sort of aerosol mist? I want one that I can spray on - so fine that it wouldn't even be noticeable at a casual glance. I'll spray the Shego-"
"Why not the Kim figure… Hey, I thought those were all supposed to be destroyed or something."
"Emphasis on the 'or something'. Anyway, since the Shego figures are in production I don't have to worry about losing it."
"How long do you need the adhesive to remain sticky?"
"Would two or three days be possible? It's not like whoever is doing this hits my desk several times a day."
Wade sighed; it seemed like a silly request. But now that he and Joss were seeing each other again he wanted to remain on Kim's good side.
Kim waited until no one was in the area, and carefully sprayed the Shego figure. With any luck she'd find out in the next few hours who was posing the figures.
The shift itself proved disappointing. The Shego figure remained standing atop the monitor, untouched by human hands, at the end of the day.
Kim went home. She assumed that if her quarry took the bait he, or she, would probably take the figure and try for a way to dissolve the adhesive. Kim wished she'd asked for a tracking chip. On the other hand, if Wade's adhesive was anywhere near as good as promised, the figure violator would need Kim's help in order to get Shego off his/her hands.
During dinner Kim's cell phone went off.
"The Go Team Go theme as a ring tone?" Shego laughed.
"And what's wrong with that?" Kim asked as she left the table.
"I think it's cool, Mommy," Sheki insisted.
"You could put off saving the world until after supper," Shego called.
Kim checked caller ID before answering. She wondered why Will Du chose to call her at home. But it wasn't Will Du on the other end of the conversation. The voice of a very angry Monique came over the phone, "Okay Kim, I want to know why Shego is stuck to my hands!"