Part 23- Normal Again?
I breathe a huge sigh of relief and my hands start to shake. I don't think I've ever been so scared in my life. Meeting eyes with Sawyer; his eyebrows are still knit with confusion and nerves. He blinks a few times before letting out a breath that he was holding. I smile and throw my arms around his shoulders. He's still tense but he slowly hugs me back.
"I've never been so scared in my life." I whisper in his ear; he nods.
I quickly throw the test into the bag and bury it in the trashcan outside. I wipe my hands on my jeans and walk back into the house. I creep my way back upstairs and found Sawyer lying on his back; staring at the ceiling. I sit next to him and stare down at his features.
"What…would we have done if you were…you know?" He said slowly.
"I truly don't know but, I know I could never get an abortion. I don't believe in that." I reply. He nods and finally looks at me. "I do know… that we would have made it; some way or another." I said a tone that made me feel like I was convincing myself if the outcome had come out differently.
I lean over and plant a soft, loving kiss on his dry lips. He accepts and lays his hand on the small of my back. I can feel his heart still beating rapidly from the nervousness of the whole ordeal. Sawyer pulls away and looks at me for a second before he speaks.
"I think I better have a cigarette or my nerves will send me into an early grave." He smiled an apologetic smile before grabbing his lighter off the night stand and making his way downstairs.
I sigh and lay back with my arm above my head. I can't believe what has happened in the last thirty minutes. Our lives were almost turned upside over sex! I mean yeah, it's great but, in the end we're just kids having a good time that could leave us with our own kid to take care of. These past few weeks have been nerve wrecking waiting for a period that may have never come. Just the thought of me being pregnant sent my brain running wild. What would my mother do? Would she kick me out and make me fend for myself? How could Sawyer and I support a baby without both quitting school and getting jobs?
I smacked myself in the forehead before I quickly stood up and walked over to the window. I could see Sawyer was still deep in thought and I don't blame him, I mean something like this really makes you think about your life.
(Sawyer's POV)
I welcome the stinging in my throat as the menthol fills my lungs. My heartbeat is slowly returning back to normal for the first time in over forty-five minutes. The whole thought of possibly being a father really freaked me out. I mean I'm only seventeen years old; how could I possibly be a father?! I can't be getting tied down by no baby.
I take another drag of my cigarette; hold it before letting it out. Wait…
How could I be so selfish!? Here I am out here having a smoke to calm my nerves when this isn't just affecting me. Ana is in their and her nerves are probably roaring also. I mean after all she would be the one carrying the baby and delivering it and nursing it. God, how could I act like such a dick to her? Flicking my cigarette and I walked back into the house. Walking upstairs I made my way into the bedroom where Ana was lying with her eyes closed. I lay down next to her and bring her close.
"I'm sorry for the way I acted earlier, I was being selfish. This didn't just f-ck with my head." I say as I kiss her stomach even though it's not bearing a child.
She takes a deep breath and looks at me. Her eyes are emotionless and her face is blank. She nods slightly.
"Its okay, I'm not pregnant. Everything will go back to normal now." They way she said it sounded like she forced it out.
God I hope everything turns back to normal or we'll be in trouble.