Should have been, could have been Chapter 10: Faith
I don't own Doctor Who.
Sarah-Jane's PoV
I nervously stare at the ghost-like creatures, desperately trying not to think about all the regrets I ever had in my life. The Meanwhiles do manage to conjure up those thoughts, though. "Probably telepathic, I mumble to myself.
"Everyone! Grab hands!" the Doctor yells. Jack repeats those instructions, sounding more like his confident old self again. We do so and as I grab Micky's and Rose's hands, I realize all my old insecurities fade away and are replaced with that old thrill of excitement I have always felt when travelling with the Doctor.
I sneak a glance at the alien occupying my current thoughts. He looks more sure of himself too and I suddenly realize this is the first time I have seen him confident this afternoon. While I want to believe he's himself again now that he has finally stopped struggling with his feelings for the blonde woman I'm currently holding hands with, I cannot truly convince myself.
What if those Meanwhiles had been actively trying to capture him all afternoon while he had simply been too distracted of old memories of the Time War and Rose Tyler to notice! After all, why else would he suddenly talk so openly about the war? Normally, he wouldn't have done so, even if the information would have been relevant for us.
As for his feelings for Rose; he traveled years with the girl and never mentioned his feelings for her, even though everyone saw the obvious attraction but now, with a bit of badgering, he suddenly confesses his feelings? True, he may not have done so if it wouldn't have made both Rose and him a bigger target for the Meanwhiles but still, knowing him, he could have found a way to lower their chances of becoming a victim, without actually telling her he loved her.
What if I could have helped him…No.
I force myself to face the Meanwhiles again, give them a slightly ironic smile and grasp Rose's and Micky's hands even tighter. The sudden feelings of regret fade away again and my smile turns genuinely happy over my small personal victory.
The others notice my smile and follow my lead. It seems to do the trick, since the Meanwhiles are starting to fade, becoming more translucent as the minutes pass.
"We're nearly there!" the Doctor yells and the smiles grow bigger.
"We can do it!" Jack cheers, sounding as cocky as ever again, thankfully.
Realizing that a little encouragement helps, I yell to everyone to hold on.
As we smile, find courage and support in each other and cheer each other on, the Meanwhiles grow so translucent they have become nearly invisible.
After on last cheer, they disappear with a bang.
We release each other's hands and I collapse, suddenly feeling exhausted. I'm not the only one apparently, since my friends all look rather tired and drained too.
"Well, I could do with a break. Anyone up for tea?" Donna asks and I nod my head at her offer.
As I follow Donna back to the Tardis, I glance at the Doctor again. The bounce in his step as back and I realize he doesn't look as pale as he used to before we discovered the nest.
If the Doctor had been under the influence of those Meanwhiles, their hold had been broken now, right?
River's PoV
I nervously look around as we enter the TARDIS for tea. After all, just because those Meanwhiles have left, doesn't mean that the Neverwheres have disappeared with them. We probably just simply pissed them off for hurting their buddies.
I glance at the Doctor. It feels odd to work with another version of the man I know so well. If I compare the looks he's currently giving Rose to those he's given me, it briefly makes me wonder whether he ever truly loved me.
Oh he cared, I know that.
Then again, if I ever had to lose him, I'd rather it be to Rose.
I push these thoughts away and try to focus on the matter at hand. I'm really not looking forward to a possible combination of Neverwheres and Reapers. Besides, their king could be nearby as well.
As I look around, I notices the nervous expressions worn by everyone in the group. Although Jack and the Doctor of course know how to mask it the best out of everyone, they're paler than usual. I notice how Martha's swallowing heavily and how Donna's hands shake as she holds her cup of tea.
"Look guys, we're all anxious, right? But if we continue to do so, we're going to be easy prey," Rose points out. Apparently I'm not the only one who has noticed the overall mood of everyone involved.
Sarah-Jane nods her head in agreement. "Rose's right. We're having the best team around one could ask for and everything will be fine. We just need to have faith."
"That's the spirit!" the Doctor agrees, bouncing on his feet despite everything. "Wait, I've got something for the Neverwheres," he yells before dashing off, Rose following him.
I stop myself from following them as well. Just because I accept the situation, doesn't mean I have to see them being nauseatingly in love.
When they're gone, an awkward silence settles in the room. A silence I can't stand.
"So, let's make a plan," Martha suggests. "About what to do when we bump into a nest of Meanwhiles or Neverwheres again, I mean."
I want comment how most plans tend to go haywire when the Doctor is involved but since thinking up strategic moves is better than drinking tea in awkward silence, I manage to hold my tongue.
"Let's take a look at each of the creatures and how we can beat them," Jack suggests. The group remains silent and I realize that now that Rose and the Doctor are elsewhere in the TARDIS, all the information probably must come from him and me.
"The Reapers will always attempt to heal a wound in time. They will also attempt to eat the oldest thing, or person present," I point out as I hear Jack swallow rather loudly at the last part of my comment.
Donna looks around curiously. "Well, the old hoarder probably keeps quite a few old things in the the TARDIS, right?"
My eyes grow big as I realize something. "I'm afraid the three oldest 'things' around are the Doctor, Jack and the TARDIS herself."
Jack gives me a mocking glare before turning serious. "I resent to being callend a 'thing'. Besides, I already died and came back to life 6 times in a row and nearly became a Meanwhile-victim, all in one afternoon. While I do like to make my own immortal life exciting, this is a bit much, even for me."
"Well, let's make sure we can distract any Reapers with something else before they decide to eat one of us for lunch," Micky suggests as the TARDIS makes a whomping sounds, as though she agrees.
Suddenly though, she lets a light shine on a book laying in the corner of the room. Martha curiously grabs it before showing it to us.
"Strange, I could have sworn that book didn't lay there before. Has anyone ever seen or read it?" she asks and we all shake our head.
"It looks pretty old though," Donna points out, peering over Martha's shoulder.
"It looks like it's written in Gallifreyan," Martha says.
I carefully take it from her, before reading it.
"It's a book on Meanwhiles, Neverwheres and the Could-have-been-king and its older than dirt," I say surprised.
Jack smiles as he looks up to the ceiling of the TARDIS. "Wanted to help us, old girl?" The TARDIS lights flicker as a response.
"So what now? We ask the Doctor to translate it, stop the Meanwhiles, Neverwheres and Could-have-been-king and if those Reapers show up, they can snack on that book?" Mickey asks.
Sarah-Jane gives him a look. "I doubt the Doctor would be happy if you feed one of the very few remaining books of his lost home planet to the Reapers."
Mickey shrugs. "True but if push comes to shove, I'd rather have the Reapers eating an old book, rather than the Doctor, Jack or the TARDIS."
"Where did you get that?!" We turn around and see Rose and the Doctor standing in the doorway, holding hands. The moment he sees the book, the Timelord walks forward, looking shocked. When he grabs the book, his hands tremble.
"I never thought I'd ever see this book again."