8:34
"Where are they?" Harry looked for the defendants. Reaching forward to the edge, he pulled himself over the top and looked over it. Boston heiress London Tipton and California heiress Sharpay Evans were standing there all right. Cute, Asian and petite, London was holding her pet Pomeranian. Blonde, petite and sometimes evil, Sharpay was holding her pet Chihuahua. They both looked up to Judge Stone climbing over his bench to see them.
"Sir, the two Paris Hilton-wannabe's…" Dan started. Both the spoiled rich heiresses took offense at that reference. "Started a riot at Monique's, a new trendy fashion place."
"She said I had hair extensions…" London gasped in shock. "And split ends!" She shrieked and pointed at Sharpay.
"Oh yeah!" Sharpay screamed and pointed back. "She said I looked like some sort of candy girl!"
"Do we have a witness as to who started the fight?" Harry asked.
"Yes sir," Christine reverted back to her old defense lawyer identity as if it were her favorite sweater. She pointed to a blonde young lady in back in Country Western clothes standing with her father.
"Hey, look! It's Hannah Montana!!!!" Someone screamed. Hannah beamed and waved as hand-held phones snapped pictures of her. Escorted by her father, Hanna neatly walked up between London and Sharpay both thinking they were her best friend.
"You were there?!" Harry was a bit star-struck. Overwhelmed and star-struck himself, Dan turned and started breathing into a paper bag.
"My son loves your music!!" Christine even fawned a bit to the teen pop star.
"Thanks…" Hannah turned back. "Uh, your honor…" Her Tennessee accent danced through her voice. "I was there before it started, and from my point of view, they both started it." Both London and Sharpay gasped at that accusation. "They were pulling tug-o-war with a blouse and it ripped, sending them into opposite directions and a lot of people who then reacted."
"Your honor…" Robbie Ray, Hannah's manager, leaned in. "Could we speed this up? She's got to catch a flight for a concert in Los Angeles!"
"So do I!!!" London and Sharpay screamed out loud.
"I've heard enough." Harry leaned back. "Since a monetary fine or a jail sentence wouldn't hurt either of you two girls…" He split his gaze between Sharpay and London. "I'm going to turn you both over to a higher power… your parents!!!"
"No!!!!" London and Sharpay screamed together and jumped toward Harry to reconsider. London was even starting to climb over the bench as Roz reached over both of them and started carrying them off. Hannah signed an autograph for Christine, noticed Dan beaming over her presence and looked for her father to protect her as she departed. Mac picked up another case from the stack and skipped up next to Harry.
"Sir," Mac grinned. "Case number two hundred. Daisy Mae Moses, moonshining." Bull carried out a screeching granny in a prairie hat and army boots. Once set down, she took her purse and began browbeating the big, bald bailiff.
"Sir," Dan glanced over the feisty grandma. "Mrs. Moses here was located in Central Park brewing illegal whiskey."
"I was not." The little old lady just barely looked up to Harry through her bifocals. "I was just fixing a little something to keep warm through the winter."
"What do you call it?" Harry's eyes drifted from Christine back to the moonshining granny.
"Rheumatiz medicine!" The granny stood proud of it.
"And it has in no way has any liquor in it?"
"Well," The old lady hid a bit of a guilty grin. "I wouldn't light a match near it to find out."
"Ma'am," Harry grinned. "You see, the problem..."
"Your honor?" A mustached fellow in a dark country suit came up.
"Yes sir?"
"I'm Jed Clampett, this is my mother-in-law." The figure with the mustache looked up honestly. "If I pay her fine, and she promises not to make her medicine, can I take her home with me?"
"Council?" Harry turned to Dan.
"Fine."
"Christine?"
"Not a problem."
"We can remit her into your custody." Harry banged his gavel. "But her fine is quite hefty. Can you handle it?"
"I reckon so." Clampett pulled out a wad of bills that made Dan stand at attention and follow Clampett's presence through and out of the courtroom. He felt drawn to their presence as Harry called him.
"Oh Dan?"
"Just a minute, Harry," Dan grinned. "Just... falling in love."
"Right," Harry turned to Mac. "What's next?"
"The owners of that big lizard that Bull was dueling." Mac replied as a tall figure in a white face and Transylvanian tuxedo strided forward. Next to him was an eerie apparition of a woman in long dark hair wearing coffin lining. They stood before Harry grinning pleasantly.
"Uhhhhh," Mac looked at the papers. "Count Vladimir Dracula and his daughter Lily." He and Harry exchanged glances knowing they had seen both of these people somewhere before.
"Yes," The vampiric gentleman grinned. "We're here to pick up Spot." He whipped out a huge dog collar over seven feet long and a foot wide. The huge hubcap-sized plate read "Spot."
"Spot?" Christine asked.
"Our family pet." Lily Munster looked like the star of an old zombie flick and beamed like a grand dame dressed in a gown made from coffin wrappings. "Oh, our son cried all morning when he vanished from the hotel. I sent my husband over this morning to pick him up as soon as we got the message you had him."
Outside the courtroom, people were yelling and screaming and running for the stairs as Herman Munster led Spot through the hallway. He couldn't figure out why the crowds of everyone who saw them ran in fright from their presence.
"No need to worry, he's had his shots!!" Munster called ahead to the running people then scratched his flat head and continued leading Spot by the loose skin under his neck. He turned the corner and ran into Bull Shannon. Bull looked at Munster's dark green jacket and pants with a black shirt, and Herman looked at his dark blue bailiff's uniform. The two seemed to regard each other for the moment with mutual respect as if they knew each other.
"You know," Bull started. "With hair, I'd look taller too."