Chapter Three

Artemis was miserable. Sitting on his bed in a small, shabby room, he thought about the last night, about his companion. They hadn't talked much this day on the road south and in the evening during their meal, but Artemis knew that he had hurt Jarlaxle, that his friend didn't feel any better than he. Even the advances of the innkeeper's beautiful daughter hadn't interested the drow, but Artemis had often felt Jarlaxle's eyes on him, sad and pleading, as if the drow had expected an apology.

The assassin had offered none. His words had been true, after all, yet Artemis realised that they had been harsher than necessary. But he wasn't a man who was used to talking about his feelings, and he didn't know how to explain them, how to tell Jarlaxle normally what bothered him. Artemis Entreri just kept everything to himself, he accumulated his anger until he couldn't restrain himself anymore. And then something like last night happened.

Kimmuriel's visit had already confused him, and Jarlaxle's unexpected advances had been just too much for the assassin. Unable to handle the situation, he had lost his temper. And he had hurt Jarlaxle. His friend. No matter how true his words had been - because Jarlaxle was manipulating him and he was always hiding his own feelings - Artemis regretted his behaviour.

But what should he have done? He had never even imagined that Jarlaxle could feel this way! Of course, Jarlaxle was capable of virtually everything, but still ... Artemis had thought of Jarlaxle as his friend and partner, never as a possible lover. He hadn't expected this, he didn't want it, and he had no idea how to deal with it, all the more as he didn't want to lose Jarlaxle as his friend. And he liked to think that Jarlaxle was still his friend. He wished to be wrong about what he had said on the day before, and he hoped desperately that Jarlaxle didn't think of him as an investigation, but as a friend.

Only a friend, not a lover.

Artemis sighed and ran a hand through his hair. His life had been turned upside down since he had first met a drow, but not in this way! The assassin almost missed the past, when he had been free of such feelings and desires, or when his only problem had been that Drizzt Do'Urden might be a better fighter. Almost.

Through a curtain of black hair that hang into his face, Artemis suddenly saw a blue gleam in the air before him. He straightened and tensed, even more when he saw who stepped through the portal.

Kimmuriel stood only several paces before him, clad in dark blue spider silk, a sly smirk on his face. Artemis felt a pleasant tingle running through his whole body, remembering their passionate kisses on the previous day, but the only thing he could bring himself to say was, "You're here again?"

The psionicist made a strange sound that vaguely ressembled a chuckle and glanced at him, his facial expression half seductive, half amused.

"I like to finish what I start," he explained in this smooth voice, before he looked around in the small room - a room with only one bed. "I see that you made sure we wouldn't be bothered this time."

"Why would you want that? You hate humans," Artemis asked, ignoring the drow's second sentence. He had to learn more about Kimmuriel's intentions and motives, as long as he was still enough in control of himself to think clearly. As much as he had tried since yesterday, he couldn't think of any reason why the psionicist would want him, would waste his time seducing him.

"You hate drow. And you especially hate me," Kimmuriel stated in an exasperated tone. "As if that had anything to do with this."

He sat down on the human's lap and embraced him slowly, ignoring his reflexive flinching, but he furrowed his brow when Artemis averted his eyes. The assassin wasn't so sure of this anymore - that he really hated Kimmuriel. Of course, he should hate him, he had no reason not to do so, but he realised that he wanted more than only the drow's perfect body in his bed. Yet he didn't know what it was he wanted.

When he looked again at Kimmuriel, the drow grinned - this unbearable, hard grin, as cold as his voice when he whispered, "Stop thinking. You can do that once I have left."

Kimmuriel's eyes glimmered coldly and in cruel anticipation while he kissed the human, a kiss that was returned with equal passion and hunger.

For once in his life, Artemis Entreri didn't want to be reasonable. He could not be reasonable. To the Abyss with Kimmuriel's intentions - the drow was right, he could think about them later! The assassin quickly started to get rid of both their clothing, desperate to feel the soft, smooth elven skin under his hands. His caresses elicited a low moan from the drow, a sound that made Artemis wonder if he had ever heard something so beautiful, so intoxicating.

The psionicist backed off for a moment and contemplated the assassin, apparently liking what he saw. His fingers slid softly over the human's chin, touching the goatee with curious fascination, before they moved further down to Entreri's chest - their touch so airy that it seemed more teasing than caressing.

Growing impatient, Artemis tried to push the drow on his back and take the initiative - had it been only for physical strength, he would have succeeded effortlessly, but the psionicist's cold glare made him stop.

"We play by my rules, or we don't play at all," Kimmuriel hissed, and while his features had softened a little under Artemis' touch, they were once again hard now. He might allow himself to sleep with the human, but he surely wouldn't allow him to be the active one.

Artemis seemed a bit unhappy and worried at these words, but he was unable to think clearly, to understand the implications of the drow's words - not with Kimmuriel's soft fingers and lips on his body, not with those promises of pleasure that their kisses held.

He allowed Kimmuriel to turn him around, moaning when he felt the drow's weight pressing against his back, accompanied by soft kisses on his neck and shoulders. Yet when he felt the drow's slender hands moving over his hip and further down, the realisation of what Kimmuriel would do crashed upon him. He heard a smooth, evil laugh at his ear, but Kimmuriel didn't proceed immediately, as if savouring the human's upcoming understanding of what awaited him, as if he wanted him to anticipate the pain before feeling it.

The assassin tensed and dug his fingers into the blanket, his lust replaced by paralysing fear. What had he been thinking? That this sadistic drow had really come to pleasure him, to satisfy him tenderly without asking for anything in return? That Kimmuriel would maybe even allow him to be the dominant one? What a fool he had been!

Artemis knew now that Kimmuriel would hurt him in a way nobody had hurt him for decades. And he hadn't fought back, didn't struggle even now. He only closed his eyes and did what he had done as a little boy - he hoped it would be over quickly.

It was late in the evening when Jarlaxle finally left the main room of the inn - alone, not accompanied by the beautiful barmaid. He had tried half-heartedly to flirt with her after Artemis had gone upstairs to take a bath, but he had been too distracted to concentrate on her. And if he was honest to himself, he had to admit that he didn't really want to spend the night with any girl at all.

He went upstairs, silently and lost in not too pleasant thoughts. On the way to his own room, he came past his companion's. Jarlaxle stopped, wondering if he should go and talk to Artemis. They couldn't go on like this, distrusting and misunderstanding each other. Just as he moved to the door, extending one hand to knock, he heard a deep moan from inside the room.

Jarlaxle quickly glanced around, making sure that he was alone, before he stepped closer to the door, trying to discern more of the sounds. Yes, it was definitely Artemis moaning, not in pain but in lust - to Jarlaxle's ears it was a quite pleasant sound. But his curiosity was too big to get lost in his own fantasies. Even though he felt slightly bad for eavesdropping, he had to know who was eliciting these exquisite moans from his restrained friend.

It surprised him enough to hear that the second voice was male - until now, he hadn't been sure if Artemis preferred men or women - but Jarlaxle almost cried out in denial when this other man said something, and though he couldn't discern the words, he recognised the voice: it was Kimmuriel's! Jarlaxle listened harder, convinced that he had to be mistaken, but there could be no doubt: the person in Artemis' bed had to be his lieutenant.

Shocked and confused, Jarlaxle hurried to his own room, shutting and locking the door behind him as if he was afraid that Kimmuriel might have noticed him. Suddenly, at least a part of the strange events of the last days began to make sense: Artemis' outburst when Jarlaxle had mentioned Kimmuriel, these strange words he had spoken last night - "First he and now you!" - and the fact that his mysterious lover of the previous evening had disappeared so quickly.

But how was that possible? How could Kimmuriel, as racist as any drow Jarlaxle had ever met, desire a human? How could Artemis invite someone who had insulted him so often to his bed? How could he, if he was able to desire a drow, welcome Kimmuriel and refuse Jarlaxle? All the more as he had to know that Kimmuriel hated him while Jarlaxle cared for him.

The mercenary leader was pacing through his room, his mind working frantically, searching for an explanation. Had Kimmuriel forced Artemis into his bed? But no, those moans Jarlaxle had heard hadn't been those of a man who was raped. Jarlaxle realised that the idea of turning back to Artemis' room and "help" him was born out of jealousy more than out of concern for his friend's safety.

But even though Jarlaxle couldn't understand what had happened, what strange chain of events had ended with Kimmuriel and Artemis apparently having much fun in bed, the drow knew that something was amiss. Because Artemis wasn't happy, but grumpier than ever, and because Jarlaxle knew Kimmuriel well enough to be sure that the sadistic and ruthless psionicist was up to something.

Distressed and worried, Jarlaxle undressed and lay down on his bed, hoping that the night might go over soon. He needed to talk to Artemis.

Artemis sighed and embraced Kimmuriel languorously, still breathless. His thoughts were blurry, and the last hours were more like a dream to his mind than like real events. He could barely remember any details of what they had done, he only knew that he had enjoyed it, that - for some reason - there had been no pain.

Kimmuriel lay in his arms, sweaty and panting, but with a look of satisfaction and contentment on his face that Artemis had never expected to see. The human snuggled closer to the drow, savouring his presence. Artemis had never stayed with anyone once he was satisfied, but the slender drow body felt too good in his arms, and Kimmuriel was just impossibly beautiful in this moment, his face free of the usual coldness and cruelty.

Even his red eyes seemed somewhat softer than usual when he opened them and looked at the assassin, before he kissed him softly. The transformation touched Artemis, and for a moment he almost wanted to say something tender.

But this peaceful state ended far too soon. Kimmuriel recovered quickly and regained soon enough control over himself. Frowning angrily and appearing surprised as if he had only just realised where he was and what he had done, the drow suddenly sat up and pushed the human away.

Kimmuriel got hastily out of bed, staring at Artemis in a mixture of disgust, surprise and confusion, before he grabbed his clothes and dressed quickly. Artemis sat up and furrowed his brow, still too absorbed in the bliss of this evening to fully comprehend what Kimmuriel was doing.

"This is ... disgusting," Kimmuriel hissed, but his voice seemed just a hint less firm than normal. "I'll need a week to get your human stench off me."

"What are you talking about?" Artemis finally managed to say. He moved to the edge of the bed and grabbed Kimmuriel's wrist to hold him back. He couldn't believe what he had just heard, not even from Kimmuriel!This drow had slept with him, had shown him a passion Artemis had never known in anybody, he had enjoyed every single second of this night, and now he said it was disgusting?

Kimmuriel pulled his hand away and slapped the human in the face, not forcefully, but hard enough to hurt him.

"This never happened, Entreri! Not a word to Jarlaxle!"

The slap had cleared Artemis' thoughts immediately. His eyes became once again hard, even though there remained a painful glimmer in them. Acting as efficiently and calmly as ever, he reached for his weapon belt near the bed. But Kimmuriel didn't seem to want a fight, which was quite unusual for the normally aggressive psionicist.

Spitting a last insult in drow, he conjured once again a psionic gate that would bring him back to Menzoberranzan.

Artemis hadn't even drawn his dagger by the time Kimmuriel was gone. He sighed and sank back onto the bed, closing his eyes and pressing his face in the pillows. Kimmuriel's behaviour confused him more and more - not his cruelty, he was used to that, but rather his unexpected tenderness in bed and even more these erratic changes of mood that didn't seem to fit the calculating drow.

The assassin couldn't remember when he had fallen asleep, and he was still tired when he heard someone at his door the next morning. Jarlaxle, he knew immediately when the traps were deftly disarmed before the drow stepped in.

Artemis didn't even bother to look at him. The last thing he needed now were more questions, more advances. Supposing that it was late and that Jarlaxle wanted to move on, the human stood up and dressed.

"We need to talk," the drow stated simply, but Artemis heard a sad ring in his normally cheerful voice that made him turn around and look at Jarlaxle. His companion stood near the door, a strained smile on his lips.

"We need to talk?" the assassin echoed. "You mean, you want to ask questions and I have to answer them?"

Snorting, he moved to the little mirror on the commode and started to shave. His usually steady hands trembled a bit, and in his distress he even managed to cut himself. This surprised Artemis as much as Jarlaxle, and thus the human didn't object when his partner went over to him and softly dabbed off the blood with a handkerchief.

"I'm sorry. I never realised that you ... that my behaviour offended you this much. You intrigue me, Artemis, and there isn't much interesting to tell about me," Jarlaxle explained slowly while his fingers trailed over the cut on his cheek. "I can try to be more honest, if that is what you want, but right now, you don't need to hear about my problems. You have enough yourself."

Artemis glanced in the mirror and had to admit that Jarlaxle was right: he was pale, a pallor that had nothing to do with the shade's lifeforce, and his eyes seemed dull and tired. He looked just as horrible as he felt, but how could he possibly tell Jarlaxle about the last night? He wasn't afraid of Kimmuriel or intimidated by the drow's threat, but he was too ashamed to tell Jarlaxle - and Kimmuriel probably knew this. So Artemis remained silent and didn't even look at Jarlaxle.

"I know that Kimmuriel was here last night," Jarlaxle said, suppressing the pain and jealousy he felt when he imagined the psionicist and the assassin together.

Artemis' eyes widened in shock when he finally stared at his partner. If Jarlaxle had told him that he knew everything about his childhood, about his father, Artemis wouldn't have been more startled.

"You know? Is this another sick plan of yours? Are you and your lieutenant having some fun driving me mad?" He almost shouted at the drow, but he already knew that he was wrong. Jarlaxle's confusion and pain were not feigned, but very real.

"Do you really think I would allow him to hurt you? I protected you from him, remember? You should stop blaming me for everything bad that happens in your life!" Jarlaxle shot back, on the verge of losing his temper. But he restrained himself, and his voice was calm and soft when he continued.

"I didn't know it was him until last night, when I came past your room and heard his voice. Please believe me, for once in your life."

Jarlaxle felt uncomfortable under Artemis' scrutinising gaze, became more and more uncomfortable with every second that passed in silence. He sighed in relief when Artemis gave a quick nod and looked away.

"I suppose my words were a bit harsh, two nights ago and today," he said so quietly that Jarlaxle barely understood him - it was as close to an apology as anything Artemis would ever say.

A huge smile lit up on Jarlaxle's features, and he asked softly, "What did he do to you?"

Artemis looked again at him, but this time his eyes seemed dreamy. He sat down on his bed and kept silent for so long that Jarlaxle wondered if the assassin had even heard him. But Artemis finally answered, and he gave the answer Jarlaxle had wanted to hear least of all.

"He gave me the best night of my life," Artemis whispered, his voice tender and sad, for once filled with all those emotions he usually kept locked up deep within him. Jarlaxle winced at these words - as if it wasn't enough that his friend slept with Kimmuriel, now he even talked about him in a way that the drow had never thought him capable of.

"He hates you!" Jarlaxle blurted out, crouching before the assassin to look him in the eyes. "If I hadn't protected you, he would have killed you back in Calimport, and he would have enjoyed it! How can you forget that?"

"I don't," Artemis answered, his voice clearer and calmer than before. "I know he hates me, but still ... he had the chance to hurt me, but he didn't. Not physically at least ..."

The assassin averted his eyes again and stared on the floor while he mumbled, "Why am I even telling you this?"

"Because I am your friend," the drow explained softly.

"Indeed," Artemis said ironically. "Then, as my friend, do me a favour, don't poke your nose into this. Until now, your attempts to help me only backfired."

"But I can't allow Kimmuriel to do this to you! No matter what you tell me, he hurt you. And he will continue to do so if he enjoys his little game," Jarlaxle protested, but Artemis only snorted and shook his head.

"Your concern would maybe touch me if I didn't know that you're just jealous. I suppose you wouldn't even be interested in me if you could have me. But you can't bear the thought that somebody else gets something you can't have."

"You're cruel, Artemis."

"You're drow, you should be used to that," the assassin retorted sarcastically.

"I don't understand you," Jarlaxle lamented, ignoring the human's remark. "I hid my feelings until now because I thought that they would offend you."

"They do offend me," Artemis interjected. Jarlaxle scowled, but he decided to forgive the assassin - he knew that his friend was just too miserable to think about someone else's feelings.

"But if you can accept the idea of sleeping with a drow, how can you choose him, knowing that he only waits for the right opportunity to humiliate you completely, and refuse me, the only one who really cares for you! That doesn't make sense, it isn't reasonable!"

"I can't say that I have been very reasonable during the last days," Artemis sighed, growing tired of their petty disputes. How strange that he had to hurt Jarlaxle continuously, even though he really didn't want to. He shouldn't be venting his anger on Jarlaxle - after all, the drow really seemed worried, even if his concern was born out of his feelings for the assassin. But was that such a bad thing? Was it so bad to have Jarlaxle care for him, even love him? Artemis couldn't remember that anybody had ever loved him or imagine that anybody would ever do so - Kimmuriel least of all.

"It's not as if I had chosen any of this. I just can't restrain myself," he said eventually, too frustrated to fend off the drow's attempts to talk about this any further. Jarlaxle sighed and sat down beside him, softly laying a hand on Artemis' forearm.

"Let me help you, please. I can't look at this misery any longer; I can't bear to see how Kimmuriel plays with you, like a cat with a mouse it has already cornered," Jarlaxle whispered, his eyes fixed on the assassin's face. Artemis couldn't remember when Jarlaxle had taken off his hat and his eye-patch, but it gave him a strange feeling of confidance, of intimacy to see both his eyes. Maybe this made him speak so openly instead of shying away from the drow.

"I want him," he answered lowly, forcing the words over his dry lips. "And ... I can't see anything else but a friend and partner in you."

"Kimmuriel can't give you what you need," Jarlaxle said desperately, clutching Artemis' wrist with all his force as if this could convince the assassin.

"And what is it I need?" Artemis answered thoughtfully, not a bit aggressive, but as if in expectance of a real answer.

"You need someone who cares for you, who understands you."

"I am sure Kimmuriel understands me, in a way. We are not so different, your heartless lieutenant and I." Artemis had no idea why he said this - he had never thought that he and the drow had anything in common, but the words just seemed right to him in this moment.

"Kimmuriel is incapable of any other feeling than hatred. He only sees you as a source of entertainment!"

"And you do not?" Artemis laughed, but it was a bitter, joyless laugh, all the more as he knew that he was once again wronging Jarlaxle, hurting him mindlessly. Jarlaxle looked miserable, and the assassin wished that he could tell him something more pleasant. But what should he do? Lie to Jarlaxle to make him happy? "I told you, this is beyond my control. I tried to get rid of these ... feelings, I truly did, but I can't."

For a long minute, they just sat there, looking at each other, but Jarlaxle didn't answer. Feeling uncomfortable in this silence, Artemis finally said, "We should take off, don't you think?"

The drow shook his head and shrugged at the same time. "I'm tired, we both are. We should get some sleep, the road can wait until tomorrow."

Artemis furrowed his brow, but he didn't object. Jarlaxle was right - they were indeed tired and hardly motivated for travelling and working, and as they were not short of money yet, they didn't need to get a job as soon as possible.

"Can I stay with you?" the drow asked, quickly continuing as he didn't want the human to misunderstand him, "I don't want you to be alone, that's all."

Again, he didn't receive any answer, but Artemis just lay down on the other side of the bed, turning his back to the drow. The bed was large enough for the both of them to be comfortable without touching each other, and Jarlaxle took his friend's silence as a yes.

And somehow, Artemis felt strangely consoled by the drow's presence, by the sound of Jarlaxle's steady breathing. When he finally fell asleep, his rest was a bit calmer than in the last days.

Jarlaxle, however, lay awake for a long time, undecided what he should do. He couldn't possibly talk to Kimmuriel about this - Artemis would kill him if he ever found out. And as much as he wanted to, he couldn't be around Artemis all the time either to make sure that the psionicist got no chance to continue his game. Jarlaxle's considerations all brought him back to the single possibility to help the human and protect him from Kimmuriel - he just had to make sure that Artemis would feel stronger about him, because if he loved Jarlaxle, he would not be such an easy prey for the psionicist, he would get over Kimmuriel. And that would be the best for both of us, Jarlaxle thought finally with a smile. I'll get the man I want, and he'll get a lover who won't hurt him.

Mutual benefit. Just the way Jarlaxle liked to handle things.