Chapter Nine

It was still dark outside when Kimmuriel woke Artemis, whispering his name and stroking his cheek. The assassin's eyes opened immediately, and although his gaze was perfectly clear and not sleepy, he was obviously confused by this early disturbance.

"What is it?" Artemis asked quietly. He furrowed his brow when he noticed that Kimmuriel had already dressed again.

"Nothing you should be worried about," the drow answered in an unusually soft voice, still caressing the human. "I just have to leave now. I can't stay away from Menzoberranzan for too long, it would raise suspicions. But I'll return to you in the evening."

Artemis' confused expression turned into an annoyed scowl, but his disappointment was quickly chased away by his reason. Of course, Kimmuriel had an organisation to lead, he couldn't stay at Artemis' side as long as he wanted. The human found to his surprise that he did indeed believe Kimmuriel - he was convinced that the psionicist would be back in the evening, and that he wouldn't change his mind again until then.

The assassin nodded slowly and placed a light kiss on Kimmuriel's lips instead of answering. The drow smiled, and he didn't get up immediately, but nuzzled again to his lover, sighing contently.

"I think I can stay another minute or two," he explained when he felt Artemis' questioning gaze. "What are you going to do later?"

"Sleep," Artemis replied curtly. He knew exactly what Kimmuriel meant, but he really didn't want to talk about that right now. Yet the drow didn't look like he was going to drop the subject, and the assassin found himself answering correctly before Kimmuriel could get angry. "I suppose I'll try again to talk to Jarlaxle."

"Why? You don't have more to say than yesterday, and he's just as hurt. Why should he listen?" the drow snorted, pressing himself even closer to Artemis, as if he needed to show his claim on him.

"I have no idea," Artemis sighed, pain audible in his voice. The thought of what he had done to Jarlaxle still haunted him, and somehow he missed his friend. He missed his annoying jokes and whims, he missed their banter. He hadn't even known until then how important Jarlaxle had become to him, how used he was to his presence. "But I can't just stay in my room and expect him to come here. I need to know what he is going to do. He'll probably leave me here and travel on alone. I can't blame him."

"Then let him go. Why are you so attached to him? You don't need him anymore," Kimmuriel argued, hurt by Artemis' sad tone. The assassin shouldn't be sad, but happy, now that he had Kimmuriel!

"He's my friend. Nothing more," Artemis quickly added when he saw Kimmuriel's scowl deepening, before he added firmly, "And nothing less. I can't give up my only friend so easily. I don't expect you to understand that; I wouldn't have understood it myself a few weeks ago."

Kimmuriel would never admit it, but he did understand, at least in a way. Hadn't Rai-Guy been as close to a friend to him as a drow could be? They had liked each other, even trusted each other, and Kimmuriel had supported Rai-Guy although he disapproved of his plans concerning Crenshinibon. Back then, he had tried to justify his actions reasonably - telling himself that Jarlaxle needed to be put aside, and that the crystal shard might indeed be a useful tool - but to be honest, he simply hadn't wanted to lose his only friend, just like Artemis didn't want to lose Jarlaxle. But the difference was that Kimmuriel had had no one else but Rai-Guy, while Artemis had Kimmuriel.

"If you insist," the drow replied simply, not wanting to start another quarrel with the human. He was tired of disputes with the man he loved, and tired of any thoughts about Jarlaxle. "Where will you go if he leaves?"

Artemis shrugged, looking almost helpless. Jarlaxle had always been the one to decide where they were going, what they were doing; Artemis had no goal of his own. He didn't have the slightest idea what he should do without Jarlaxle dragging him along on his adventures.

"You could come to Menzoberranzan," Kimmuriel suggested without thinking about it. He realised the moment he said it that this hadn't been a good idea. Even with Kimmuriel's protection, the human would have a hard time in the drow city, and there was the risk that someone might learn about their relationship. Kimmuriel suddenly remembered a conversation between Artemis and Jarlaxle he had overheard in Calimport, when the human had said that his time in Menzoberranzan had been the worst of his life.

Indeed, Artemis was growing even paler at these words, while his eyes flared almost angrily. Kimmuriel quickly kissed him and got up before the human could answer.

"I really have to go now. But you should think about it; you can't do nothing just because your partnership with Jarlaxle has ended," he stated matter-of-factly. He kissed Artemis again, softly urging for a response to be sure that the human wouldn't spend the day being angry at him. It was only when Artemis had returned the kiss that Kimmuriel finally drew back and summoned a psionic gate to return to Menzoberranzan.

Artemis sank back on the bed, a desperate sigh on his lips. He was tired - it was still over an hour before sunrise - but his mind was far too restless now to let him fall asleep again. All the problems he had refused to think about on the previous evening were assaulting him again, and this time there was no way to escape them.

He knew that he had no choice but to go to Jarlaxle, yet it was obvious that every conversation would be futile. As Jarlaxle had put it, this was over. This. Their friendship, their partnership, their time together. But Artemis realised that he didn't want it to be over. Although he had cursed Jarlaxle over and over again when they had worked together, although he had often wished to get rid of the annoying drow some day, the thought of spending the rest of his life without Jarlaxle was unbearable.

And even without the fact that they had truly become friends, Artemis simply had no idea what to do with his life. He had followed Jarlaxle for several months now, and he couldn't imagine travelling alone as a mercenary, nor did he want to settle somewhere and work for some guild or local criminal. He was stuck in a small town on the coast, a place he had never really wanted to go to, and without any place in the world that would welcome him.

Except Menzoberranzan. Or, more precisely, Kimmuriel, because Menzoberranzan would still treat him as iblith. Artemis had sworn that he would never again set a foot in that cursed city, for any reason. He couldn't have known back then that he would ever fall in love with a drow, but even that didn't make Menzoberranzan any more inviting. No, he'd rather stay alone and aimless on the surface than return to this hell and endure countless humiliations.

Artemis groaned quietly and buried his face in the pillows, inhaling Kimmuriel's scent that still lingered there. If the drow would only be more helpful! But Artemis understood that Kimmuriel had no interest in a reconciliation between his lover and Jarlaxle, and he wouldn't be able to do anything about it anyway. Nonetheless comforted by the memory of Kimmuriel in his arms, Artemis drifted into an uneasy sleep after a while.

When Kimmuriel returned to his quarters in Menzoberranzan, he took a quick bath and got dressed, knowing that any lingering human smell on his body might be perceived by some attentive drow - and the last thing he needed were rumours that he had a fancy for human slaves.

Nobody who saw him leave his quarters could have guessed that Kimmuriel had just spent the whole night with his lover: his face was the same callous mask as always, his eyes showed - if any emotion at all - detached cruelty. Yet the few soldiers he met on the way to his office seemed strangely uneasy in his presence, and it was obvious that something was wrong. The usually silent drow soldiers were whispering to each other, and their voices grew louder and more agitated when they saw the psionicist. Kimmuriel was just wondering if he should simply read their minds to find out what had happened when one of his lieutenants walked up to him.

"Captain," he called, bowing as usually, but seeming just as embarrassed as the lesser soldiers. He stood before Kimmuriel, hesitating, obviously unsure what to say. A threatening glare from the psionicist was, however, enough to make him talk.

"Jarlaxle returned a few hours ago; he wishes to speak to you in his office," the lieutenant blurted out quickly, looking wide-eyed at Kimmuriel as if he was expecting the psionicist to throw a tantrum then and there.

Despite centuries of self-discipline, Kimmuriel just stared at the other drow, taken aback and speechless. Had he been human, he would have probably turned pale.

"What do you mean, he 'returned'?" he asked finally, still dumbfounded.

"Well, he used some magic item to come here and he told us that he had grown tired of the surface. There was no reason for us to refuse him entrance," the lieutenant answered quietly. He had supported Rai-Guy and Kimmuriel during their revolt against Jarlaxle, but he was - like most Bregan D'aerthe soldiers - convinced that their leader's erratic, unreasonable behaviour had been caused by this crystal shard. Now that the item had been destroyed, Jarlaxle was probably again as cunning and sensible as before, and Bregan D'aerthe had always gained much from their leader.

Kimmuriel knew all this, and he knew that Jarlaxle had never cut his bonds with his band. It was common knowledge among Bregan D'aerthe that Jarlaxle had planned to come back one day, and few soldiers would be stupid enough to oppose him upon his return.

After several seconds, Kimmuriel just turned away and passed the lieutenant, walking towards Jarlaxle's office. The guards let him pass, and the fact that he was at least safe from curious looks once the door had closed behind him didn't reassure him in the least.

Jarlaxle was sitting behind his enormous desk, rocking on his chair and looking through some papers. His smile was so wide that he seemed just as good-humoured and untouchable as ever, and even knowing what had happened, Kimmuriel couldn't detect any crack in Jarlaxle's mask. The psionicist just stood in front of the desk, still stunned and confused. He wasn't sure what he had expected Jarlaxle to do, but the thought that his former leader might just return to Menzoberranzan and reclaim Bregan D'aerthe had never crossed his mind.

"Ah, Kimmuriel," Jarlaxle said finally, looking up and giving him his sweetest smile. "How good that you are back, we need to talk."

"Why are you here?" Kimmuriel asked stiffly, his hands clenching to fists at his sides. He felt his anger and hatred build up, and it took him much self-control to refrain from attacking Jarlaxle right then and there. This cursed lunatic had obviously decided to make his life a living hell, by seducing his human, by making Artemis so unhappy when he should be content, and now by returning to Bregan D'aerthe at the most inconvenient moment. And he had the audacity to smile at him as if nothing had happened, smile this hypocritical, infuriating smile!

"Why not? I told you that I'd return one day for co-leadership," Jarlaxle explained with faked surprise. "And as my former reason to stay on the surface has become an unbearable nuisance, this is a very good time to return. Of course, given the events of the last weeks, co-leading Bregan D'aerthe is hardly an option anymore. I am sure you understand that you will have to leave."

"You are throwing me out?" Kimmuriel asked, not because he hadn't understood Jarlaxle, but because he needed a moment to fully realise the consequences of this decision. As a houseless rogue, he needed Bregan D'aerthe to survive in Menzoberranzan. If Jarlaxle threw him out, Kimmuriel would have to leave the city.

"If you want to put it that way - yes," Jarlaxle replied, his voice now much colder, as if he was unable to keep his friendly mask on for too long. "You should thank me; you'll have more time for your little whore that way."

"Watch it," Kimmuriel snarled, glaring at Jarlaxle, who was still trying to uphold his relaxed expression. He almost looked as if he was just mocking Kimmuriel, but the pain and anger in his uncovered eye were plainly visible now, and his voice was bitter. Kimmuriel was almost trembling with anger, partly because Jarlaxle dared to send him away, but also because he insulted Artemis. Had Kimmuriel been more self-reflective in that moment, he would have been surprised that this outraged him so much.

"Or what? You are hardly in a position to fight me, Kimmuriel. I am a better leader than you, and every soldier here knows that. They supported you when I was acting unreasonably, but they remember very well that Bregan D'aerthe needs me, or it will decline to an average mercenary band. You would have to face me alone, and that would leave our poor Entreri deprived of his dear lover. We don't want that, do we?"

"Nobody here has forgotten the disaster in Calimport," Kimmuriel retorted, trying to remain reasonable instead of giving in to his hatred.

"I have enough supporters in Bregan D'aerthe," Jarlaxle said nonchalantly, but the strained expression never left his eyes. "You didn't really think that you were my only contact during the last months, did you? I assure you, I saw quite a few happy faces when I returned."

"This is nothing but a petty act of revenge. You can't bear the thought of not getting what you want, that's all. You're pathetic," the psionicist shot back, on the verge of losing his temper. The worst thing was that Jarlaxle was actually right. No matter what had happened in Calimport, Bregan D'aerthe had remained Jarlaxle's band, and Kimmuriel had been, for many soldiers, only Jarlaxle's replacement, but not a leader in his own right.

"Am I? Well, I'm not the one who is going to spend the rest of his life on the surface with a grumpy, unbearable human. You will probably realise soon enough that Entreri is plainly detestable if you spend much time with him," Jarlaxle said in what was supposed to be a casual tone, but his voice trembled slightly. It hurt him as much to say these words as it hurt Kimmuriel to hear them.

"Now, unless you are keen on settling this by force, you'd better leave. If you return to Menzoberranzan, I'll make sure that you will be put out of the way."

Kimmuriel hesitated for a moment, but he knew that he could not fight Jarlaxle - not alone and without any preparation, while Jarlaxle could call several soldiers in a matter of seconds. There was no loyalty among drow, and the fact that his leadership had been accepted during the last months didn't mean that any soldier would risk his life to defend said leadership. Kimmuriel had no choice but to leave - for now.

"You will regret this," the psionicist hissed, lingering for a moment on the prospect of making Jarlaxle's eyes explode in his head. Without waiting for an answer, he turned around and left the room, feeling like he would kill anyone who dared to look at him too curiously.

For the second time this morning, Artemis was wakened - not by kisses, but by angry curses. He opened his eyes wearily to see Kimmuriel stepping through the bluish gate and dismissing it with a thought. The drow's red eyes were flaring with anger, his slender body was trembling as if it could hardly retain his rage. Kimmuriel just stood in the middle of the room, suddenly silent and staring at Artemis.

The human got up in a swift motion and went over to Kimmuriel, looking him in the eyes without touching him. He didn't say anything, but preferred to wait for him to speak.

"I'm going to kill Jarlaxle," Kimmuriel finally spat out, his voice more venomous than it had ever been when the drow had mocked Artemis in the past. This one sentence made Artemis shiver and he backed off one step, not out of fear, but out of surprise. After all, Kimmuriel had been so calm and happy barely two hours ago.

"I'm sick of him, of his meddling with my life! I'm sick of your talking about him, I'm sick of seeing him, and I'm going to make sure that he won't ever bother me again!" the drow continued, and his voice left no doubt that he meant every word.

"What happened?" Artemis asked as calmly as he could manage. Kimmuriel's words worried him, but he needed to know what had happened before he could try to dissuade the drow from his plans.

"He threw me out, that is what happened! He returned to Menzoberranzan yesterday evening and now he told me to leave, to stay on the surface or he would have me killed. He's gone too far now, and he'll pay for it," Kimmuriel said, his voice a bit lower now, but no less angry.

Artemis just stared at him, as dumbfounded as Kimmuriel himself had been upon the news of Jarlaxle's return to Bregan D'aerthe. He opened and closed his mouth several times without saying a word, and nearly a minute passed before he spoke again.

"You couldn't possibly live on the surface," Artemis whispered, too taken aback to say anything more intelligent. He could perfectly understand Kimmuriel on this point, though: being on the surface was probably the same for Kimmuriel as being in the Underdark for Artemis.

"Most certainly not. I won't allow Jarlaxle to stand in my way anymore. He's already caused me too much trouble!"

"Don't kill him," Artemis said suddenly, his eyes almost pleading. Understanding Kimmuriel's anger didn't change anything about the fact that the thought of Jarlaxle's death made Artemis feel sick.

"Are you still defending him? Do you know what he called you? He said you were my 'little whore'. Now these are truly a friend's words, no?" Kimmuriel's anger suddenly seemed directed at the human. "Damn it, Artemis, open your eyes! Jarlaxle isn't your friend anymore. Currently he is what keeps us apart! I thought you had made your choice."

"I have," the assassin replied, biting down his bottom lip. Little whore - he couldn't even imagine Jarlaxle saying that, let alone saying it about him. But neither did he believe that Kimmuriel was lying to him. "But that doesn't mean that I want him dead. There must be some way to settle this without ... killing him. Just give me some time to think about it instead of moving against him immediately. Maybe he will change his mind."

Kimmuriel's eyes remained hard and uncompromising, until Artemis added softly, "Please." He felt the assassin's hand taking his, and then a slightly stubbly cheek rubbing against his, comforting, calming, reassuring.

"And what am I to do while you think about it?" the drow asked with a sigh, leaning against Artemis. He felt suddenly very weak: as his anger was dissipating, the reality of this bleak situation crashed down on him. Jarlaxle had taken everything from him; the only thing he had left right now was this human he had once despised and who was now holding him in his arms, more tenderly than anyone else had ever done.

He didn't get an answer - probably because Artemis had no answer to this question. Remaining silent, the assassin pressed Kimmuriel to his chest, stroking his hair and his back, trying to calm him and lead his thoughts away from Jarlaxle.

Soon enough he had a slightly trembling, unnerved drow in his arms, who seemed so weak that Artemis wondered if he would simply slump on the ground without any help. Seeing the drow so desperate, the assassin felt suddenly angry himself, angry at Jarlaxle, who was causing Kimmuriel so much pain. For a moment, he hated Jarlaxle for punishing Kimmuriel for Artemis' choice, and even the thought that killing Jarlaxle might not be such a bad thing crossed his mind.

Yet it was only a very short moment before all his good memories of Jarlaxle returned, and he reminded himself that Jarlaxle had been the one who had comforted him when Kimmuriel had only played with him, and that Jarlaxle suffered most now. No, they couldn't kill him, there had to be another way. Another way to make Kimmuriel's return to Bregan D'aerthe possible, but also a way to reconcile Artemis and Jarlaxle.

While he was lost in his thoughts, caressing Kimmuriel the whole time, the drow found to himself again, locking up his anger and his fear behind his usual calm expression. He looked up hesitantly and stroke Artemis' cheek.

"What now?" he asked, his voice more composed than before, but there was still a slight note of anxiety and helplessness in it. Facing the idea that he might have to live on the 'surface for at least some time, Kimmuriel was suddenly much less self-assured than usual.

"We can stay here for the next days, if you want," Artemis replied just as hesitantly. "I doubt that you want to discover the surface."

"No, I'd like to get prepared to turn this annoying bastard into a bloody pulp, but I suppose that I have to wait a few days until you've talked to him," Kimmuriel said in a perfectly even voice. "You should start thinking before my patience is wearing thin."

Artemis didn't answer, but turned away and sat down on the bed, burying his face in his hands. Kimmuriel hadn't said it explicitly, but he had thought it, and Artemis knew that he was right: whatever he, or they, might try to do, Jarlaxle's decision probably wouldn't change, and Kimmuriel could probably not be dissuaded permanently from attacking the mercenary leader. The idea that two men, two drow would kill each other because of him seemed more and more absurd to Artemis, but the whole events of the last weeks had been absurd. Absurd and painful, but at least nobody had died so far. And if Artemis could do anything about that, it would stay this way. He didn't want to found his relationship with Kimmuriel on Jarlaxle's corpse.

Kimmuriel sat down next to him, taking his hand and leaning against him. They were silent for a while, each of them lost in thoughts, until the drow whispered, "You will see, Artemis, everything will be alright once Jarlaxle is dead. Nobody will bother us anymore. I will return to Menzoberranzan, and you can come with me, or stay here if you prefer. I'll make sure that nobody will annoy you down there."

Artemis shook his head, but he didn't shy away from Kimmuriel's caresses. After everything Jarlaxle had done for him, the human refused to be responsible for his death.

"You can't have both of us, not anymore. Jarlaxle won't forgive either of us. As long as he lives, he is not only in my way, but also in yours," Kimmuriel continued, his voice soft and almost urging.

"Stop trying to manipulate me," Artemis said calmly, looking at the psionicist. "I got your point, but I need to try at least to find another solution instead of killing him right away."

"Don't be a fool, Artemis. There is no other solution!"

The assassin didn't answer this time, knowing that Kimmuriel was right. Yet he knew also that Jarlaxle could be, despite his harsh words, quite gentle and understanding, at least towards Artemis. Even though Artemis usually refused to cling to foolish hopes, he couldn't bring himself to accept Kimmuriel's plan. Still, he had no idea how to get through to Jarlaxle's more gentle side after everything that had happened. He had to try, though, if he didn't want Kimmuriel to kill Jarlaxle - or, even worse, to die trying.