Chapter 18
I came to inform you
Shintarou had been staring at the front of their store for about five minutes, gathering his resolve. He took a deep breath and pushed the door open. He could see his sister behind the counter, while his mother tended to a customer and his father brewed tea in the back. He waited for his mother to go back to the counter and approached, his fingers shaking.
"Mother, Father." He said, his voice firm.
"Oh, Shintarou. How nice seeing you here. You rarely come to the store these days." His mother acknowledged with a pleasant smile.
"I apologize, my work is quite time consuming." He bowed slightly. "There is an important matter I would like to discuss with you in private." He said finally.
"I see, the store will close in a few more hours, I hope you don't mind waiting."
"Forgive me mother, this is quite urgent, I'm afraid I need to address this issue as soon as possible. I promise it will not take long. I am sure Shizuku can handle the store for a short while." He looked over at his sister apologetically, but she seemed to understand the situation and just nodded.
"I understand. The wedding is approaching, it's natural to be nervous about it. It'll be a good practice for Shizuku." His father declared, wiping his instruments and placing them back on the shelves. "We can talk in the back."
When they reached their private tea room, he sat across his parents on their table, his hands splayed over his knees. He inhaled and exhaled deeply, relishing briefly in the scent of the tea leaves that had always felt like home.
"I must regrettably inform you that I must cancel my engagement with Karasuma Kanako-san." He said in one single breathe, bowing his head deeply and waiting quietly for their response without looking up.
He heard his father take a sharp intake of breathe, but it was his mother who spoke first.
"Shintarou, could you please explain the meaning of this?"
He sat up and saw his father's face devoid of all color, too shocked to speak a word. His mother looked serious and severe. She was, after all the real family head of the Midorima household. Shingen, his father, previously a Tachibana, had married into the prestigious Midorima family and become the face of their business, but it had always been his mother, Mahomi, who truly handled all the family affairs, especially the relations with the tea plantations. His mother embodied their centurial tradition with the grace of her posture and speech and the elegance of her movements and gaze, while his father was in charge of the crude, business side of the equation.
"There is a person I love." He began simply. "And this person loves me back. It is my desire to spend my life with that person and find happiness by their side. I realize this notice is terribly untimely, and it was never my wish to fail your expectations, but I am afraid it is impossible for me to carry on with this marriage." Midorima finished with a deep bow.
His mother tapped on the table quietly.
"It has come to my attention that you have been involved with Takao Kazunari again. He used to be your best friend in Shuutoku, if I remember correctly. Is this related to this sudden decision?"
He knew his mother was asking out of pure courtesy and that she already knew the answer. He had never revealed the truth of his relationship with Takao to his mother, but he realized it had been naïve to believe she was not aware of it. She had always been very cunning, and the way she emphasized the words "best friend" left no doubt to the truth of her intent.
"Yes, Mother. I have in fact loved him, and him only for many years. I had kept it from you knowing you would not approve, but I can no longer hide the truth. Takao is the person I want to share my life with, and I can not possibly imagine it being any other way."
His fingers trembled. If he had fallen in love with a decent girl his parents would not have been happy, but they would have approved in the end. But they would in no way react positively now that they knew his real orientation.
Silence was all the response he got. After a few minutes, he looked up to find his father livid with something that was in between untapped fury and disgust. The vein on his forehead had popped up and was pulsing dangerously. He had never seen his father so angry, and he had to admit the sight made him a little uneasy, but he had already made his decision. He clenched his fists and met his father's eyes with determination, prepared to face anything he would answer.
"And I assume, Shintarou, that this is not your idea of a jest, correct?" His mother asked, still calm, her elegant hands crossed over her lap.
"I am not joking, Mother. Sadly, humor has never been my forte." Probably one of the reasons why he'd never been particularly popular in school.
His father gritted his teeth and looked up at him with blood in his eyes. "I should have known. I told you, Mahomi that letting him join the sports club would be nothing but a distraction, and now thanks to that, this ungrateful boy has turned into one of those despicable f-"
"Homosexual, father, but I believe it is not something you can be 'turned' into, especially not by basketball."
His father ignored his remark. "You haven't spoken to the Karasumas about this travesty, have you?"
Shintarou quirked one eyebrow, not sure of what his father could be thinking. "No, I haven't. I thought it most appropriate to let my own family know first."
"Good, good. Then not everything is lost. Shintarou, you will remain in the house until the day of the wedding, and you will not go out except for your shifts at the hospital. We will get in touch with the man responsible for this and let him know he is not to present himself in your near vicinity ever again. Perhaps we may have to persuade him with money, but that shall not be a problem. We still have one month to change you back to normal and no one will ever need to know that this conversation even happened."
Shintarou sighed. Well, he had imagined worse. "Make no mistake, Father; I did not come here to ask for your permission. Like I said before, I came to inform you of my decision, purely out of the respect and gratitude I hold for you and Mother, after all the problems I have caused you and everything I owe to you. I regret that I may be disappointing you as your son, but I hope in time you will come to understand that I can't fulfill your expectations without condemning myself to unhappiness. It is a selfish decision, but I am not going back on it. That is all."
His father's face went a deep shade of red, but Shintarou was no longer afraid. Now that the truth was out, he felt liberated, as if a heavy weight had been lifted from his shoulders. His friends had been right. If his family could not at least accept him for who he was, then maybe he shouldn't let their wishes dictate his future. He thought of Aomine, whose family had turned their backs on him when they learned the truth and his chest tightened in pain and worry, but he also thought of Takao, the warmth of his body in his arms, the beauty of his smile, and any possible doubt dissipated.
"Do not test my patience, Shintarou. If you insist on this non—"
"Do it." Shintarou interrupted. "Whatever it is you will threaten to do, go ahead. I will not change my mind. I want to be with the person I love. I want to try to be happy. Nothing you say will make me go back on that decision."
He thought he saw a small, comforting smile draw itself on his mother's lips just before his father blew up, hollering offensive words that no longer meant anything to him.
He breathed a sigh of relief as he closed the door of the shop behind him. His father's yelling could still be heard all the way to the street, and even some of the customers had gotten frightened by it and left. It certainly could've been worse, he mused.
He took out his cellphone and browsed for Kanako's number. It was a little bit late today, but he wanted to meet her as soon as possible so this could be finalized. He still had plenty of things left to do.
"Shin-nii!"
He turned back to see his younger sister, now 18 years of age and almost 180 centimeters tall, rushing out of the shop.
"I'm sorry about that. I'm afraid Father will be difficult to handle for a while." He apologized.
She shook her head and smiled at him. "Don't worry, Shin-nii, he'll calm down. I'm glad for you. I was worried you had given up on being happy. Kanako-san's fun and everything, but she's really not suited for you. And I know Kazu-san is the person that makes you the happiest. I think Mom knows too, she'll make Dad come around."
He smiled back and ruffled her green hair, which they'd both inherited from their mother. "Take care, Shizuku. I regret to say I may not be able to show my face around here for some time."
"Good luck, Shin-nii. My birthday's coming up soon, don't you dare use your problem with Dad as an excuse to miss it." She threatened, faking a pout. "I hope you're very happy." And in an unexpected move, she stepped closer, stood on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek.
Shintarou had been waiting at the restaurant for ten minutes when Kanako arrived. She looked beautiful as ever, her burgundy hair tied up in a loose bun, short strands of curly hair framing her smooth face, her eyes glimmering with the lights. She was wearing black dressing pants and a white blouse, with a royal blue overcoat on top, as if she was just out from a business meeting. She waved at him cheerily and ordered a drink before sitting across him at the table
"Sorry for the delay, Shin-chan, I hope you didn't wait long."
He shook his head. "I didn't, and it is I who should apologize. I did call you up on a very short notice, and the way I treated you when we last met was unsightly to say the least."
Back then he'd been so horrified to see that Takao had realized the truth about the marriage that he'd blocked everything else out of his mind and pretty much shoved Kanako outside, half-assedly mumbling that he'd call her later.
She waved her hand dismissively and undid her bun, her long hair cascading down her shoulders. "It was rather rude, but I'm not mad at you, it seems my timing was quite bad."
Terribly so, he wanted to say, but he knew he had no one but himself to blame for his fallout with Takao. Which is why he was here in the first place. To fix it and make it all better again.
"The truth is I wanted to discuss a serious matter with you, and I apologize because I am aware of how poor my timing is."
She downed the first drink she received in one gulp and asked for an immediate refill.
"C'mon, don't be so formal, we'll be husband and wife soon, you can speak to me normally. I'm not as stuck up as Sei-chan either."
Shintarou sighed and tapped his teacup lightly. "That is precisely the thing we must talk about. I am very sorry for the inconveniences, but I can no longer carry on with our marriage."
He could hear the liquid being poured into her glass and she didn't respond until the waitress left.
"Is that so? Why the sudden change? It's not like you were ever into it from the start." She sipped on the second drink quietly, as if she wanted to hear his answer before she got all the alcohol into her system.
He felt a lot calmer about this after facing his family. He couldn't go back on it now, nor did he want to. And if he'd been able to face his father's wrath, his insults and his threats, he could deal with Kanako, even if she lost her temper.
"The fact is that I'm… gay. A homosexual."
Kanako blinked and downed her second glass.
"So? I've known that from the start, you're not precisely subtle, Shin-chan. It's okay, you can have some boytoys after we get married, so long as you keep it from the press it should be fine."
That… wasn't quite the response he'd expected. It took him a moment to collect back his thoughts, during which she had the waitress just leave the bottle on the table so she could get her own refills.
"I am afraid that would still not work. I am in love with someone. With Takao. And I want to spend the rest of my life with him, fully, openly. He does not deserve to be a… 'boytoy', or a poorly kept secret. He deserves to be happy and I want to make him so. I sincerely apologize, but I think it would be best if we called off our engagement."
Unlike his father, Kanako responded immediately with a long hum, as if she was considering something. "That's a shame, really, you're such a cutie after all. But I guess you won't change your mind, and I see no point in forcing this through. My father won't take it so lightly, but it's okay, I'll talk to him. I think your shop would lose its charm if it became part of our group anyway, it does have a nice homey appeal. I'll work it out with Sei-chan so neither of our businesses gets too affected by this."
He looked up to meet her smiling face, surprised by her positive response. He didn't expect her to flip out like his father, but she'd so far seemed quite excited about the wedding –if only because it was such a grandiose event- and he had imagined she would get pretty angry at seeing her plans canceled.
"So you are not upset about it?"
She gulped down the last of her drink and smiled reassuringly at him. "Well, I was kind of looking forward to the wedding, we'd made amazing plans. Now I'll never get to wear that dress, and it was so pretty too, -I would've looked fabulous- so it does make me kind of sad. But let's not pretend you're breaking my heart or anything, Shin-chan, you're not that cute. And besides, the company is my one true love." She refilled her cup once more. "I'll have you make it up to me by paying all of my drinks for tonight. Sounds fair to you?" she winked playfully.
He nodded, a little befuddled by her quick pace.
"Anyway, I kind of saw it coming, sort of. You and Kazu-chan, I mean. You probably don't notice it –it took me a while to notice too-, but when you look at him, it's as if you were looking at the most valuable treasure in the entire world. I thought it was my imagination at first, but when I saw you two at your place the other day I just kind of knew." She sighed. "Any girl would feel lucky if their lover would look at her like that. You must love him quite a lot."
Thinking of Takao brought a small smile to his lips and he felt his face heat up. "Yes, I do." He confirmed, uncharacteristically as it was for him to speak so openly about his feelings.
"Well then, let's toast to that." Kanako replied merrily, raising her sake cup. "To Kazu-chan and Shin-chan's happiness!"
They toasted without saying anything else, and she gulped hers down in a single go. He had never noticed how much of a heavy drinker she was. On second thought, there were many things he'd never bothered to learn about her, even though they had been engaged for nearly two years.
"Oh, by the way, Shin-chan-" she began, but he cut her off immediately.
"Pardon me, there is something else I would like to ask of you."
Takao sighed with exhaustion. "Well, that's the last one." He announced to the empty apartment, as he dropped the last box on the floor and proceeded to collapse next to it. It had taken some time but he'd finally managed to move out of his old apartment and leave all its nightmares behind. After half a month of searching, he'd found a place for his own, instead of leeching on Kagami and Kuroko's kindness (much as he would've liked to continue doing that).
The scars on his back were slowly beginning to fade now; the words were still visible, but he had faith that they would disappear completely, like all the other marks. In his quest to rid himself of his terrible past, he'd also disposed of a large amount of his possessions, so now his entire life was reduced to five regular-sized cardboard boxes. The thought made him just a little bit sad, but he was encouraged by the idea that now he would truly start his life anew.
He was in a new home –much more spacious than the previous one-, and he'd also gotten a new job, since the mini basket team had placed second in the tournament, and a scout from a prestigious elementary school had approached him to ask him to coach their basketball team –which was great, since at the moment he didn't even have any furniture. In one more year he would finish his Sports Education Masters, which would give him the chance to get an even better salary. In the meantime he would be juggling with a jam-packed schedule: school, two jobs, and both his own street basketball team and the mini basketball kids, which he didn't want to abandon. It would be straining, but he was already excited by the new turns his life was taking.
He got up from the floor, revitalized by his sudden resolutions, and decided to start unpacking. The first box he opened was the one with his clothes. His favorite jacket was on top, quite conveniently, since it was getting late and the temperature had started to drop in the last few hours. He put it on and instinctively dug his hands into his pockets. He felt a crumpled piece of paper in the left one, and when he pulled it out and unfolded it, he realized it was the invitation for Midorima's wedding. It suddenly dawned on him that the wedding was in less than two weeks. His heart throbbed in pain, but he forced himself to ignore it. He was not going to start his new life being lovesick and miserable.
That made him remember that he hadn't called Kanako-san to let her know he would not be able to attend in the end. He took out his new cellphone and dialed her number, which was fortunately easy to find on the invitation, since he'd lost all of his contacts when he'd disposed of his previous phone.
"Hello?" Her voice came from the other side of the line, energetic as ever.
"Hello Kanako-san, I'm Takao." He announced calmly.
"Oh, Kazu-chan, long time no see!" she squealed delightfully. "How are you doing? You know, last time Midorima-kun just kicked me out and I couldn't greet you properly, I'm sorry!" she pouted.
His heart ached again, remembering that day and the way his world of illusions had shattered in front of his eyes. He ought to get this conversation over fast before he started to dwell too much in the past.
"The truth is, I have some bad news to tell you." He began, hoping against all hopes that she wouldn't blow up when she heard what he had to say. Those endless hours he'd spent helping her organize the wedding had made it clear that she could be a pretty terrifying bridezilla, after all. "I have become extremely busy, and I'm afraid I won't be able to attend your wedding. I know it's pretty inconvenient for you to find a new best man in such short notice, but there was nothing I could do." He explained, separating the phone from his ear just in case she started screaming.
Instead, she just gasped and oh'd, not sounding even remotely upset. "Did you not get the letter, Kazu-chan? I sent them to everyone a week ago!" she exclaimed, sounding more surprised than angry.
"I'm sorry, you must've sent it to my previous address, but I've recently moved out of that place. What about that letter?" He hadn't been in his apartment at all since July, the first time he ran away, except to pack his belongings and move out, he hadn't even bothered checking the mailbox either. Was she trying to switch the topic in hopes that he'd forget about quitting his wedding job?
"It's just that the wedding and my engagement to Midorima-kun have been cancelled. Good thing you called me, you would've wasted your time going to the church and no one would be there!" She giggled briefly, apparently imagining him all suited-up standing in an empty church and looking like a fool. "I'm surprised you didn't know, I thought Midorima-kun would tell you, since he was the one to break it off."
Takao's heart started pumping really fast and his brain started to buzz in confusion. "O-o-oh? That's unfortunate. I-I-I'm sorry to h-h-hear that." He stuttered, having problems in forming a coherent thought.
"I know right?" she moaned "We would've had the cutest kids ever, what a waste of DNA!" he also heard her huff in disappointment. "But he said he already had someone he cared about and that he couldn't betray his heart. Isn't that sweet? I never knew he could be such a romantic. Midorima-kun's special person must be extremely lucky, won't you agree?"
His head was too busy spinning out of control to notice the subtle insinuation in her tone. He was feeling overcome with a weird mixture of confusion and euphoria. Had Shin-chan really broken off his engagement, out of his own initiative? Had he changed his mind? Would he choose him this time? Why hadn't he called him then, if that was his intention?
The back of his mind tickled upon realizing that Kanako wasn't calling him 'Shin-chan' anymore. Or maybe he was imagining it? Was he thinking too much about this? Would Shin-chan come to knock at his door and take him away in his white horse? That's right, Shin-chan didn't know his new cellphone number or address, maybe he'd tried to call but hadn't been able to? So many questions and he had no way to confirm them, and he was feeling dizzy. His heart might as well burst open his ribcage and explode or something, because it was beating so hard and loud he was sure everyone in a 5 kilometer radius would be able to hear it.
"Oh, you know what, Kazu-chan? Midorima-kun won't let me call him 'Shin-chan' anymore, isn't that super mean? It's such a fitting name for him, right? But he got so serious about it when he asked I couldn't say no. It sounded as if it was something really important." Takao realized he'd probably missed half of what she had been saying, but his inner turmoil was already bad enough without having to decipher her blabbering.
Karasuma Kanako smiled. She could hear Takao's heavy, uneven breathing, and his silence proved he was at least reacting to the news. It was certainly not too late for Midorima and his boy, she thought, pleased with herself. A few seconds later, the line clicked shut, which made her smile grow wider. She remembered his ex-fiancé's stern look when he asked that she dropped the cutesy petname and she giggled, thinking Takao was truly lucky to be so loved.
"That name… it was given to me by an important person. They are extremely precious to me, and I don't want anyone else calling me that."
To be continued
I can't believe we're entering the final stage of this story T_T I'm getting so emotional! Even if this is sort of a transition chapter. I want to thank you all for the amazing support and comments you've left, I'm very happy many loved the Rainbow intervention! I hope you're ready for the last stretch.
I don't really know what to say, so please tell me what you thought about this. I heavily headcanon that Shin-chan grows super attached to his nickname and it becomes this special secret thing for him and Takao and just nnnnfffgghh… just slay me.
See you next time and I really apologize for taking so long, I just have a lot of stuff going on right now. Thanks for your patient, I hope you're still enjoying it!