Part Three: Lost and Found
----Chapter One: On The Way
Tapping her fingers on the steering wheel, Chloe frowned impatiently as the red light held her at a stop. While she knew that she really hadn't been sitting there all that long, it felt like it had been an hour. She felt like she should be able to move unimpeded on her way to deal with Lex. It was for the good of the city, for the good of all people in the city, so they should be moving out of her way and letting her get down to business. The fact that it would make her feel better wasn't really important... well, not until Lex was dead.
Of course, to get to Lex she was going to have to get around all sorts of security. She had most measures taken care of with the things that Ollie had gotten for her. Contacts that were perfect replicas of Lex's iris scan, a latex glove with his fingerprints on it and a pass key into the most secure parts of the building.
Now all she'd have to deal with is the people.
She didn't want to kill any of the security force. Most of them probably had a family to go home to, or at least a loved one somewhere. She had been stripped of most of her family, and didn't want others to have to deal with that feeling.
Chloe knew that it was entirely possible she could lose her life in trying to take down Lex. It wasn't just a possibility, it was a likelihood. If she came out of this unscathed, she'd have to question if what happened was real. No, her death was probably how this would end. It was how so many people that dealt with Luthor had their dealings with him end.
Running a hand back through her hair, Chloe sighed as the light finally changed and she could take off towards the city again. What would her death do to Lois and Clark? God, it would probably free them up more than anything. Lois would get to stop worrying about her so much, and taking time out of her day to make sure that she was ok when she knew she wasn't. Not having to support a deadbeat cousin was probably the best thing that could happen to Lois.
And hell, if she did die, it was probably what was best for Jacob. She loved that little boy so much. He was all the best parts of Lois and Clark wrapped up in one tiny package, and how could she not just love that to death? But having to be around her all the time couldn't be good for him. Her life was so bad that eventually things would be bad just being around her. She didn't want anything about his life to ever be bad, so maybe this would be for the best.
Of course, on the off chance she didn't die in her attempt to kill Lex, where was she going to go from there? She could probably erase any physical evidence of her crime, as well as delete any video taken. She'd hacked Lex's systems enough times over the years to know where to find what. Would that be good enough? Hell, she could dump gun pieces all over the river and they wouldn't be able to trace it back to her anyway after she wiped her prints.
The only real problem would be lying to Lois and Clark. That would probably buy her some time, but they would figure it out eventually. It's what they did, and she wasn't good enough to never get caught. God, with all the thinking about how she would actually kill Lex, she'd failed to put any real forethought into what she would do once he was dead. If she got out of the building alive, she was going to have to make some quick decisions.
Focusing her eyes on the road, Chloe put all the thoughts about after the fact out of her head. One step at a time was the best way to go about things, of course. The first step was getting into the building and Lex's office. That as all she could afford to think about right now.
Chloe let all the lights of the city drown out her thoughts. They were still a little way in the distance, but they stood out against the night strongly. She could tell which building was which simply by how it was lit after spending so many years in the city. She imagined that was true for most people, but that recognition gave her a sense of belonging. Only people that have spent a lot of time in the city can name a building by its lights.
Realizing that it might be the last time she ever got to take in the skyline like this, Chloe did her best to commit the outline of the city to memory. Not that she needed a memory if she was going to die. A memory seemed like the last thing she would need if she died in her attempt to make the world a place without Lex Luthor, but this might be her last good thought about the world.
No, that wasn't true. She knew as soon as she had the thought that her final happy thought about her time in the world would be about the time that she spent with Lois and Clark.
The fact that she'd gotten to spend her life next to two figures that loomed as large as they did made her feel like she'd lived a life few got. Up until everything had gone wildly wrong, she really had been one of the privileged few to see greatness in an up close and personal sense. Every now and again, she'd even gotten to take part in it.
She would be forever grateful to them for letting her be a part of their lives. It was painfully obvious that with a few turns in another direction here and there, they still would have found a way to be together but they may have never even heard of her. Well, Lois would have heard of her, what with the cousin thing, but one minor twist in the road and she's never that close to Lois and they make their respective marks on the world without her even knowing that she could have had a minor part in the whole thing.
Of course, in the grand scheme of things they may not have met for a good while longer than it took them to meet in Smallville. Without being forced to move there by her dad, Chloe didn't think Lois would have ever set foot in Smallville before meeting Clark Kent. But they would have ended up together, she was sure of that. Were she to believe in fate, she knew that they were the closest thing she would ever see to fate.
And of course, were she to believe in something intangible and ridiculous like fate, she knew that fate would have her dying alone way, WAY down the line. With the way her life had gone, it just felt to her like she would lead a long, sad life all by her lonesome. She'd have Lois and Clark and their family to spend time with, but he'd never have somebody special.
God, would she even curse somebody to spend the rest of their lives with her? Nothing good could come from that, could it? She had no prospect of success in her professional life. If she did beat the odds and settle down, could she be happy as a housewife? Jesus, would she want to try? She couldn't stand her life without work in it now, but to be fair the only thing that had made her latest job tolerable was Blake.
Fucking Blake.
She didn't know if she could have loved him, but if nothing else he had made her feel like her life wasn't total shit anymore. He was kind of like a patch for the hole where her heart had been after Mark. Of course, that patch had been torn away and the hole was made even deeper. She didn't know if she'd ever find it again. It barely felt like she'd had one in the first place.
Chloe tapped her foot impatiently on the clutch, waiting for yet another light to turn green. So far it felt like she was hitting all the damn lights just wrong, making the drive into the city take far longer than it should.
She didn't know why, but she didn't really feel nervous going into this. Shouldn't a person on the road to kill another person feel nervous? Had she lost so much of her humanity through the last six and half months that she no longer felt the same things that other people felt?
Or maybe this was the way all people felt when they felt they had to kill somebody. Maybe a lack of nerves is what made it possible.
Chloe's thoughts were interrupted by a buzzing on the passenger seat. Glancing over, she saw her phone light up. A picture of Lois popped up on the screen, and she sighed. She knew it was coming. Here's hoping her story held up long enough to avoid any interference. She grabbed the phone and answered. "Hey, Lo."
"Chloe, you want to tell me why Clark found a box with a bullet and weed in it?"
Wow, was that stupid. Why the hell hadn't she taken a minute to hide her hitter? "Uh, well, the bullet is because I bought a gun after I got mugged to feel a little safer. The weed, well... uh, I got tricked into it?"
"Try again, and this time don't say your excuse as a question."
"Fine, you want to hear my reasons? My life sucks. My life has sucked for the last six months, and getting so high that I forget about my problems for a little while has really helped me. For a little while a couple times a week I'm not dwelling on the fact that my life had no purpose, no meaning and no impact."
"You felt so bad about everything that you turned to getting high? Chloe, why couldn't you come talk to me?" Chloe was about to respond but Lois beat her to the punch. "Of course you couldn't talk to me, I probably would have told you to find a guy. This is almost entirely my fault."
Chloe was speechless for a moment. "What... what? Almost entirely your fault?"
"I'm still giving you your due blame for smoking weed. Doing it in college, while not the best thing is understandable. Doing it at the age of 32 just to make yourself forget that you life sucks? I'm not all right with that. And yes, I know that had I not been so insistent about fixing your life in my stupid, stupid way that you may not have needed to use drugs to escape, but that's all in the past as of this moment."
"So... what are you saying?"
"I'm saying that I'm sorry for the way I've acted. Trying to get you to find a guy so that you could have what I have was monumentally stupid. I know that you have to find your own happiness, just like I did, but I'm not good at seeing people I love in pain. It make me want to find a way to stop the pain. Most of the time I succeed, this time I failed miserably and I'm sorry."
Chloe worked her jaw a moment, trying to find words for a response to what Lois had said. She held the phone to her ear with her shoulder for a second as she changed lanes. "I, uh... thanks, Lois."
"Thank me later. Why the hell do you have a gun?"
"Well like I said, I wanted it for safety after I got mugged and Clark couldn't get there in time to help me."
"No, I remember that. Where are you taking your gun?"
"Shooting range." Wow, that had come to her quickly. "I like to take it out and fire off a couple clips to blow off steam whenever I can't, well, smoke. I hope you don't mind that I took your car."
She heard Lois sigh on the other end. "No, that's all right. Do you take your gun everywhere?"
"No, not everywhere." Chloe stopped and thought a second. "Actually, yeah. I almost always have it in my purse with me."
"Guess there wouldn't be much point to it if you didn't have it with you. Look, will you come home so we can talk about things? I promise that I won't push you to do anything you don't want to do, though I might make a suggestion here and there. But first and foremost, I'll listen. So will Clark. Jacob would, but I imagine he'll be a little too tired to help."
Chloe smiled. "The only help I ever need from Jacob is hugs."
"Well then I promise at least four hugs if you come home right now, Chlo. Talk to me to blow off steam."
Chloe went silent for a moment. She swallowed as she drove onto one of the bridges heading over the river and into the city. "I appreciate the offer Lois, and I may take you up on it later, but right now I need to do this. It helps, and tonight I think it will help more than ever."
"Yeah, ok. Promise me we'll talk when you get home tonight, though, all right? I really want to get some things out in he open so we can move on, so you can move on and find your happiness, wherever that may lie."
Chloe smiled, giving the phone a brief look before saying anything. "Thank you, Lois. I love you."
---
Lois ended the call and frowned, grinding her teeth together for a second before walking out of the den and back upstairs. She found Clark sitting in Jacob's room with, the owner of the room giggling. He looked up at her as she walked over and kneeled next to the chair.
"Did you listen like I asked?" She saw him nod out of the corner of her eye as she smiled at Jacob, who was looking over at her. "What did you hear?"
"She said shooting range too quickly. And it sounded like she was driving over a bridge."
"I agree on the first part, but I couldn't hear the second. Do you think that she is really going to a shooting range?"
"Where else do you think she would go?"
Lois looked down at the floor. "I don't know. I don't know how to tell if she is lying to me anymore, and that kills me. I've lost sight of who Chloe is lately, and it kills me."
"Hey. This isn't your fault."
Lois looked over at Clark. "Isn't it? At least partly, isn't all of this my fault? You heard what she said, Smallville. She's felt so bad that she has to use weed to forget about her life and goes to shooting ranges to blow off steam. The second one I don't have a problem with, but Chloe smoking weed? She wouldn't do it in college for a thousand bucks. It's not who she is.
"Until recently, we've always sort of been each other's release valve. If one of us had too much built up inside we would rant and rave in front of the other, letting everything out in the open so that we could be helped. I took away her release valve and drove her to find other, less healthy outlets. Unfortunately, they don't seem to be helping as much as talking always has. If I could have listened, we might have avoided all this, Smallville."
Lois watched as Clark stood up and took Jacob over to his playpen, placing him don inside before walking back over to her. He pulled her up to her feet and enveloped her in a hug. He always gave really good hugs. "Lo, we're going to figure everything out. Forget about what has already happened and focus on what needs to be done."
"What needs to be done," Lois mumbled into his chest. She looked up at him. "What do you think needs to be done?"
"I think whatever needs to be done is whatever you want to do."
Lois frowned. "That's not much of an answer."
"It's the truth. What do you want to do? Do you want to wait for Chloe here, or do you want to track her down, wherever she may be?"
Lois stared at him for a minute before looking over at Jacob as he called for her. She smiled and waved at him. "I want to track her down, Clark. I want to find her and take her out to dinner, just us adults, so that we can talk and clear the air. I don't know if she's really going to a shooting range or not, but that's where we should start looking."
"All right, that sounds good. Why don't you go look up shooting ranges in the phone book. I'll call Lucy to see if she and Jimmy can watch Jacob tonight."
Lois held up a hand to stop him. "No, call your mom and see if she can have him out at the farm instead. Lucy is eight, almost nine months pregnant and doesn't need to be chasing Jacob around, not to mention she could go into labor at any time."
Clark nodded and grabbed Jacob before walking out of the room. Lois stood there a second, closing her eyes and gathering herself. Hopefully Chloe wouldn't be angry once they found her. Maybe Lois would even shoot off a couple round from Chloe's gun, who knows. That seemed like optimistic thinking, but she felt like she could use the optimism at the moment. With one last exhaled breath, Lois opened her eyes and walked out of Jacob's room.
Heading downstairs, Lois found Clark already bundling up Jacob in a couple layers of clothes. She flashed each a tight smile and headed into the kitchen, grabbing the phone book out of the drawer and flipping through the pages. She was about to start looking through names and locations when Clark walked into the kitchen.
"I talked to mom, she said it'd be fine to leave him with her for the night."
"Good. We left food and everything out there last time we stayed with her, right?"
Clark nodded. "Yeah, but I'm taking extra stuff anyway. As we've become well aware of, one can never have too many diapers." He walked over to her and let her give Jacob a hug and kiss before getting a peck on the cheek for himself. "I'll be back in a little while."
Lois smiled at him as he walked out before focusing on the telephone book again. Grabbing a pen and a piece of paper, she started sorting the ranges into those in the city and those outside the city. Since Clark had heard a bridge, she figured that Chloe was most likely in the city, but that didn't rule out all the bridges so she listed every one in the book.
Once she had them all listed, Lois took the list out into the living room and pulled out her laptop. Once on the internet, she checked to make sure that all the addresses in the phone book were current and checked to make sure that she had all the ones possible. She found a couple that weren't listed in the book, which made her happy she'd thought to double check.
Sitting in the living room, her feet bounced in anticipation of finding Chloe. She didn't know why, but she felt like there was more on the line than just finding her cousin so they could talk about things. She didn't want to call it life or death, but she felt like she always did when she was about to go into an investigation she knew could get her into trouble. Unfortunately, she generally felt much better about those than she did this.
Her anxious energy overtook he a moment later and Lois bounced up out of her seat. Tearing the list in half, she left the list of places outside the city on the coffee table and quickly scrawled a note to Clark in the top margin. Jogging towards the front door, Lois grabbed her coat before grabbing Clark's keys and heading outside. She popped into the car and turned it on. Taking one last deep breath, she buckled herself in and backed out of the driveway, heading in the direction of the city.
Pulling on her gloves, Chloe walked out of the parking garage and tucked her hands into her coat pockets for extra warmth. Looking back over her shoulder, she smiled as she spotted the indoor gun range that she'd parked near. She knew Lois would want to come look for her. Sitting and waiting was like the anti-Lois action, so she'd needed to find a place. This one would do.
Looking back to the way her bod was faced, Chloe let the smile melt away. Her jaw set with resolve, she looked around the skyline until she spotted the LexCorp building a couple blocks away. Exhaling through her nose, she waited for traffic to be stopped before crossing the street. No point doing something stupid like getting hit by a car before she could finish things with Lex.