Chapter 5: Confessions and Creatures
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10thDoctor42: Yes, Rose Smith was a Doctor Who reference. I was wondering how many people caught on. :)
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Two days after my failed attempt to defeat a boggart, I got a note from Professor Lupin at breakfast, requesting that I come to his office during my free period between Arithmancy and Care of Magical Creatures.
"What do you think he wants?" Elena asked, peering at the note over my shoulder as I sat next to her at the Gryffindor table.
I shrugged. "Maybe he wants to ask if I'd like to drop Defense Against the Dark Arts."
She sighed and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, giving me a squeeze.
"If I'd had to face that boggart, I would've frozen up, too. It was scary enough from where I was sitting. Besides, you'd never had to do anything like that before."
I huffed. Elena could never stand to see anyone hurt or upset, which was especially helpful at the moment.
"Good morning, ladies!" George Weasley beamed as he and Fred sat across from us. "Uh-oh. What's wrong?"
"Nothing," I shrugged, crumpling Professor Lupin's note in my fist.
"What's in your hand?" Fred asked.
I frowned. "Nothing for you to worry about. Elena, are you going to eat that piece of toast?"
I snatched it off of her plate before she could answer. She just sighed and held her hand out expectantly. I broke the slice of toast in half, handing her one of the pieces. George rolled his eyes at us.
"So, are you going to tell us what's in your hand?" he asked, helping himself to sausage.
"Professor Lupin wants to talk to me about something," I sighed. "It's not a big deal."
I shoved the ball of parchment into my book bag. When I looked up again, I saw Fred watching me.
"What?" I demanded.
He shrugged, reaching for the plate of bacon.
I sighed. "I'm going to go ahead to class. I've got Arithmancy first thing and I want to get there early."
"I'll see you in Care of Magical Creatures, though, right?" Elena asked.
"Right. If you find a way to get those books to stop biting, let me know, okay?"
She gave me a thumbs up. I grabbed my bag and waved to George. He saluted teasingly. Fred remained focused on his bacon. His ears had gone pink. I shrugged it off and left the Great Hall.
"Alyssa," Professor Lupin smiled, opening his office door. "Please, come in."
He stepped to the side to give me room to walk through the door. I glanced around the room. In the corner, in a sort of tank, there was a strange creature that looked something like a cross between a goblin and a dwarf. It had red eyes and long, sharp nails that looked more like claws.
"What is that?" I asked, taking a step toward it. It swiped at me angrily.
"Red Cap," Lupin explained. "They live in holes in the ground wherever human blood has been spilled. Fairly easy to defeat for witches and wizards, but extremely dangerous for Muggles. I'll be introducing him in our next class."
I watched the Red Cap for another moment before remembering why I was here.
"You...wanted to talk to me about something?" I asked.
"Have a seat," he invited, sitting behind his desk and gesturing to the chair across from him. I sat and waited for him to speak.
"Alyssa, I'd like to talk about your boggart," he said.
I grimaced, knowing this had been coming.
"What about it?" I asked.
"It was...disturbing, to put it mildly. If you're comfortable with telling me, I'd like to know what it was."
I hesitated. "And if I don't feel comfortable talking about it?"
Lupin smiled. "Then you don't have to. I won't bring it up again."
I raised my eyebrows. That had not been what I expected at all. I glanced at the door, considering leaving. Lupin didn't say anything as he waited for me to speak.
"It's kind of a long story," I heard myself say.
"In that case, would you like a cup of tea?" he asked.
"All right," I nodded, feeling a bit awkward. "Thank you."
"It's no trouble," he assured me, tapping the kettle with his wand. It whistled sharply, steam coming from the spout.
I was silent while he made the tea, and accepted the chipped cup he offered me. He took a sip of his own tea, clearly waiting for me to begin.
"My mother..." I faltered, wondering whether or not I could trust this man. "Professor, do you know about the Black family?"
Lupin's eyes widened. He set his cup down slowly.
"I've heard of them, yes. And your mother...?"
"Was a Black," I explained, the words coming quickly now, tripping over themselves in their hurry to leave my mouth. "Her name's Isabelle. She ran away from home when she was my age. She told me she'd had enough. That she didn't want to be like them. But...she also told me once that she could see her sisters in me. And I know that not all of them are exactly nice. Bellatrix Lestrange went to Azkaban for torturing those people. Narcissa Malfoy...well, she raised Draco Malfoy, so she can't exactly be a saint. I...I don't want to be like those people. But it's in me. It's always there. So that's what my boggart means. That's what I'm afraid of. Ending up like them."
Professor Lupin gave me that same long look that he had given me in Defense Against the Dark Arts. I took a sip of tea to give myself something to do. It had cooled off during my story, and now it was barely warm.
"Thank you for sharing that with me," Lupin said after another second of silence. "That was brave of you."
I shrugged. "Not really. I did run out of class, after all."
He chuckled. "I think that was understandable. When I was in school, I got sick the first time I faced a boggart. It's not easy. But now that you know what it is, it'll be easier to face."
I nodded, keeping my eyes trained on the Red Cap in its tank.
"I knew someone very much like you once, Alyssa," Lupin said gently. "He struggled with his family tree, too. But he realized that his family didn't have to define him. You'll realize that, too, in time."
I felt horrified as tears welled up in my eyes. I tried to wipe them away subtly.
"Thank you," I said, once I could speak steadily.
"You're welcome. Anytime you feel like talking about this, or anything, I'll listen."
"Thank you," I repeated, then stood. "It's almost time for my next class. I don't want to be late."
"You'd better hurry, then," he said with one last smile.
I nodded and headed for the door. I was about to close it behind me when I stopped.
"Professor Lupin?"
He raised his eyebrows.
"Yes?"
"You...won't tell anyone what I said, will you?"
"Not if you don't want me to."
A sense of relief washed over me.
"Thank you," I sighed. "One more thing...why did you take the time to talk to me?"
He chuckled. "You remind me of a friend I used to have."
I hovered in the doorway for another moment, but he obviously wasn't going to elaborate, so I took my leave.
"Elena!" I called, catching sight of her walking to Hagrid's hut with her fellow Gryffindors.
She stopped and turned, grinning when she saw me. I ran to catch up and she had to catch my shoulder to keep me from smacking into her.
"Hey!" she laughed. "You're late!"
"Not quite," I corrected her, glancing at my watch. "We've got five minutes before we have to be there."
"Still, you're cutting it a bit close, aren't you?" she asked as we set off again. "What did Professor Lupin want?"
"Just wanted to make sure I was okay after that incident with the boggart," I shrugged.
"Are you?"
"Of course I am," I said, elbowing her. "So, do you think Hagrid is going to carry on with the hippogriffs?"
Word had spread like wildfire after Hagrid's first lesson the day before. Apparently, Draco Malfoy had been attacked by a hippogriff. I figured he'd provoked the poor thing, but of course, there would be trouble anyway.
"I don't know," Elena said, biting her lip. "You don't think he'll get sacked, do you?"
"Doubt it," I assured her. "Dumbledore would never get rid of Hagrid."
"You're probably right," she agreed, sounding relieved.
Hagrid was waiting outside a paddock at the edge of the Forbidden Forest, looking a bit nervous. I gasped as I saw the creatures inside.
Hippogriffs were strange-looking, to be sure. Their bodies, hind legs, and tails were those of a horse. Their front legs, heads, and wings belonged to an eagle. They seemed to be staring at us through startlingly orange eyes. They were odd, but in a magestic sort of way.
"Wow," I breathed. "They're beautiful."
Jenna and Kathy, who were standing just to my left, looked at me like I'd lost my mind. But Megan nodded, stepping closer to me to say, "Alex always said hippogriffs were the coolest. And instead she went off chasing dragons."
I grinned at the mention of her sister, who was currently traveling abroad, studying dragons. Alex had loved Care of Magical Creatures.
"All righ', settle down!" Hagrid said. "Yeh should all open yer books ter page-Eh?"
Megan had raised her hand, her cheeks rosy.
"Um...how do we open our books?" she asked. She took the Spellotape off of her copy of The Monster Book of Monsters and it immediately tried to bite her. She dropped it with a slight shriek.
"Can anyone open their books?" Hagrid asked, looking at the class hopefully. When we all shook our heads, he heaved a sigh and grabbed Megan's copy. It snapped at him, but he ran a finger along the spine and it shuddered before falling open.
"Yeh've got ter stroke them," he explained, as though it should've been obvious. "Try it, go on."
I pulled the binder clips off of my copy and ran my forefinger along the spine of the book before it could bite me. Sure enough, it opened. I could hear Fred and George snickering behind me as they stroked their books. Elena and I rolled our eyes in unison.
"Righ' then!" Hagrid said, clapping his hands together. "Yer welcome ter come a bit closer, if yeh like."
I stepped forward, leaning on the fence, but I was one of the few who did.
"As yeh can read in yer books, hippogriffs are proud creatures. They're easily offended."
"Like teenage girls?" Lee Jordan asked. I jumped; he and the Weasley twins were standing close to the fence a short distance away from me. Hagrid didn't say anything to him, but his beard twitched, so I knew he was smiling.
"The point is, yeh've got ter be polite ter hippogriffs. Yeh bow ter them, let them make the firs' move. If they bow back, yeh can touch him. If not..."
"You're in trouble," I murmured.
"So," Hagrid said. "Who wants ter go first?"
I glanced back at the class. No one looked particularly eager, even those who I knew liked Hagrid.
"I'll go," I offered, and froze.
Fred Weasley and I had spoken at the same time.
I raised an eyebrow. He crossed his arms, then let them drop to his sides and shrugged.
"Ladies first," he grinned, motioning toward the hippogriffs. I rolled my eyes and clambered over the paddock fence.
"Thatta girl," Hagrid encouraged. "Let's see...Let's introduce yeh ter Glamourhook."
He untied the chain holding the black hippogriff.
"Now, then...Keep eye contact an' bow."
Glamourhook stared haughtily at me as I bowed, trying hard not to blink. When I rose, the hippogriff regarded me for another second before bending its front knees and sinking into a bow.
"Well done!" Hagrid cried. "Very good! Go on, give her a pat."
I reached out cautiously and touched her beak. She closed her eyes and stretched her head out to nuzzle my face. I laughed, patting her shoulder.
The class applauded. I turned around to see Elena and Megan beaming at me. The Weasley twins climbed over the fence next, and the others followed.
"That was brilliant, 'Lyssa!" Megan cried, throwing her arms around me. I stumbled into Fred, who righted me with a smirk.
"Not bad, Summers," he said, before heading off to join George and Lee with the chestnut hippogriff. "Of course, I could've done it better."
I rolled my eyes, walking in the opposite direction, to where Elena was petting the grey hippogriff.
"Oh, Princess?" Fred called, making me look back. "You smell like hippogriff."