Some mild lemons. I don't own Naruto. Their loss.

Tsunade growled as she signed off on the extended leave form. Someone always wanted something. But as Shizune had pointed out, every man needs a vacation. Even Kakashi Hatake.

"Hope he enjoys his vacation. I'm going to work his ass over when he gets back."

A nearby ANBU smiled behind her mask. Oh, he'll enjoy his little break. She thought. And get that working over if his former students have anything to do with it.

o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0

"Is he awake yet?" Kiba asked as he scratched behind Akamaru's ear.

"He's starting to come around." Sakura was holding a light pen up over Kakashi as she checked his pupils.

"What was in that drink you gave him?" Naruto asked from behind the copy-nin.

"A little drug Tsunade showed me how to make. Renders the user unconscious for a small amount of time then keeps him from being able to use chakra once he's conscious. It won't last more than a few hours but I figured we'd be taking breaks. Plus, if our mission succeeds he won't want to leave." She smiled a little to herself as she lowered the pen and stepped back from her former sensei.

"Speaking of missions," Shikamaru looked back at the large entertainment center. "I'll go set these up. I think Twin Peaks will be a good one to start with." He looked at the cover. "Looks like they have some girl on girl action in this one."

As their self appointed leader started working up the system, everyone else turned there attention back to a now stirring Kakashi. His one eye opened slowly and he groaned. Sakura smiled down at him from her standing position.

"Wha...?" Kakashi asked groggily.

"Hello, Kakashi-sensei. How do you feel?" She replied with a smile.

His one eye narrowed and he took her in, then with a glance, everyone else as well. Hinata was fidgeting and glancing back at Shikamaru, Shino was standing by unconcerned (at least from what he could see), Kiba was grinning from ear to ear as as was Naruto. Ino was giving him a pitying look as was Choji. He turned his head a little farther to see Neji glaring at him.

"Where are my books?" Was all the white-eyed boy asked before being pushed aside by a composited Shikamaru.

"Welcome to your intervention, Kakashi. We have a wonderful evening planned for you."

Kakashi blinked at Shikamaru. The boy was a bit fuzzy.

"What did you do... to me?" He asked around a mouth that felt like cotton.

"We've made sure you'll be comfortable for the next few hours. Don't worry. We don't intend to hurt you." Kakashi rolled his eye and Shikamaru continued. "We simply feel that you need a little reeducation. I have to say I'm a little disappointed. I always thought you were a perv. Who'd have guessed you were a sissy."

"Wha?!" Kakashi started only to have a rolled up sock stuffed in his mouth.

"Sorry, about this, but you need to pay attention." Kiba said calmly as he stuffed the sock in place.

"Kiba? Was that your sock?" Ino asked as she stared at the dog-nin's feet.

"Yeah? Why?" He replied.

Kakashi turned a little green while everyone else wrinkled up their noses or gaped openly.

"That's a little... cruel don't you think?" Choji asked as he put his chip bag down on the small table beside him. He picked up the drink next to it and took a long pull, swishing in around in his mouth.

"My feet don't smell." Kiba lifted a foot and sniffed. His eyes rolled back and he hit the floor.

Ino shrugged. "Leave him. I'll get him later."

Shikamaru lifted the remote and smiled.

"Everyone ready?"

All present took up seats next to or behind Kakashi who's eyes were watering profusely. Ino reached down and haul Kiba up next to her.

"I can't take that." Shino reached out and plucked the offending footwear from Kakashi's mouth.

The copy-nin gagged several times until Choji offered him some of his drink. When he'd regained his composure he cleared his throat.

"What are we watching?" He asked calmly while trying to pull chakra to call his nin-dogs.

"Something educational, and don't bother trying to get loose. You can't." Shikamaru stated flatly.

He tried anyway only to find they were right. He could barely move his limbs and couldn't call up any chakra at all.

"Don't get alarmed. Like I said before, we won't hurt you." The shadow-nin finished.

Sakura bounded into her place above and behind Kakashi.

"Alright! Let's get this party started!"

There was a knock on the door which Choji went to check. He returned and looked at Naruto.

"There's ANBU here and they want you. You do something wrong?" He asked the blond shinobi.

"I'll take care of it! You guys go ahead and start." He yelled with a cheery wave and a nervous chuckle as he bounded for the door.

Sakura gave a startled glance in his direction. Since when had Naruto put mail before naked women? She shrugged off the odd thought as Shikamaru remote started the dvd and the movie began.

o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0

(outside)

"Time to pay up." The female ANBU stood just outside the entrance staring at blond head peeking out of it.

"NOW? You want to settle up now? I'm kinda in the middle of something here!" Naruto replied with feeling.

"And I'm on a mission in six hours. I want this done before I go." She replied, her expression hidden behind her mask.

Naruto looked back as he stepped outside and closed the door. He caught site of TenTen and Lee making their way to the building, a look of alarm passing his whiskered face.

"Fine, but make it fast!" He loudly whispered. "I don't want them to come looking for me."

"Embarrassed?" She retorted as she ushered him down the stairs just as TenTen and Lee walked up.

The green boy and kunoichi both took note of his leaving with ANBU escort. Not willing to draw attention to themselves then dropped their curious stares and walked by. Leaving Naruto to handle it on his own.

o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0

The beautiful raven haired beauty lay basking in the late afternoon sun. Her hair floating behind her on a gentle breeze. The small cherry trees shade her on the low hill standing out in the forest. Birds chirp idly and she stretches full length. Her short white gown riding high to show thigh and lower hips of creamy white. Suddenly she stills as a howl pierces the now darkening horizon. She looks around franticly, her gown twisting and twirling around her. Another howl and she begins to run. Breast bouncing she rushes into the woods. Leaves crunch underfoot as she runs barefoot over roots and stumps, the mysterious howl moving ever closer. She trips over a hidden root and flowingly tumbles into the soft bed of grass and leaves below.

Sakura yawned. When she'd seen the title she'd freaked, thinking for sure they'd stumbling onto information about Naruto and the nine tail fox that none of them were suppose to know. But when the movie began to show credits she was grateful, yet somewhat disturbed to see it was the stage name of the male star, as well as the title of the movie. Apparently this guy was a big hit in the porn industry. She'd never had much use for the stuff and now she knew why. It was boring. Sure, the guys were drooling all over themselves, well, except for Kakashi, who looked horrified , and Shino, whom you couldn't see. But none of the women were going to get anything out of this. Thirty minute of her life wasted as far as she was concerned. She was all ready to stand and leave when the next scene caught her eye.

He steps from the woods, bare and glistening in the dwindling light. Flowing golden hair meeting equally golden skin. Lean muscle moving sinuously under that perfect flesh. She gasps and turns to scramble away as he moves toward her with slow measured steps. Grace pouring from every limb and sweat sheening from every pore.

Sakura's eyes popped open as did every other woman in the room. She heard TenTen gasp and Ino smack her lips. Hinata whispered an awed "Oh my" as the man moved in on the woman. It was, by far, the most magnificent sight Sakura had ever seen and she was more than ready to see more.

"Turn that up." She tapped Shikamaru on the head.

"Oh yeah, I gotta hear the voice that goes with that body." Ino said thickly.

"It's probably dubbed." Kiba pouted as the golden god moved in front of the raven hair beauty, effectively blocking her from view with his well toned ass.

"Who cares." TenTen stated as she moved fractionally closer to the television.

"It's like a train wreck. You can't look away." Kakashi said in morbid fascination.

Then the man turned.

Thud...

o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0

(shimmering voice over from the present)

I'd seen this kind of thing before, mind you. I'm no virgin. But I'd never found interest in pornography. There is no beauty, mystery or passion in those films. It's simply casual and sometime blatantly rough sex. Not my cup of tea (don't tell Gai). But this film they were showing me seemed to grow on me. It had hints of passion and mystery. The beauty being chased by the golden fox god. Her knight attempting to save her. If there was sex mixed into the whole then I suppose it was alright. I was applauding the director of the film. He was a visionary and should produce more of this enlightened pornography. That is until...

(soft focus flashback)

Naruto rushed back into the building, slightly winded and smiled at the others. Their faces were fixed on the screen in front of them. Some wide eyed. Others horrified. A couple simply drooling. Choji was downing popcorn at the speed of light, his eyes moving with the scene on the screen. Kiba was laid out on the ground, Akamaru licking his face.

"What did Shikamaru put in there? It's not guy on guy is it?" He said as he moved closer to inspect the screen.

Sakura watched her teammate as he turned to watch the beautiful raven-haired woman moan daintily as she rocked from the force of the thrusts she was taking from behind. She watched his eyes grow wide as he looked at the golden man rocking his hips behind her in a gliding and painfully aggressive rhythm. The slapping of his hips meeting her backside loud in the silent room. When Naruto finally swallowed and took in a breath she shakily spoke.

"Since when do you do porn?"

o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0.o.0

Sorry to leave you hanging. Hope it's good for you. Didn't get to much of the lemony goodness. They'll be more next chapter. Till then you know the drill.