Chapter Two
"So I'm tiny." Thought Bella, "That's new" She bounced along on the mattress noticing how springy it was at this miniscule size. However after about five minutes of that she became very bored and looked around for something to do, unfortunately she saw nothing so she crawled over to the edge of the bed and peered down to the distant wonder which was her floor. "I've jumped off a cliff, I can survive this." She thought but reminded herself that wood is much more solid than water. With a rush of happiness she noticed a folded towel that she had cleverly dropped by the bed in her hast to jump into Edward's arms. Ahhh...Edward, she was distracted for a moment but then brought herself back to the task in hand. Well there was one thing in all of this; out of all the times her mother had told her to hang up her towel and "Get into good habits" she was glad she had ignored her every time. She chuckled. She could probably jump that distance, she might not break any bones, maybe. She bent her knees to jump but before she could jump Edward walked into her room. Bella looked up at his face, now miles above her.
"Edward!" she squealed, surprised at how squeaky her voice was all of a sudden. "Down here!" Edward looked around, where was that annoying little squeaking sound coming from? He thought and went to check the hinges of the door.
"No!" Bella screamed "Down here! I'm over here Edward." He shrugged, still looking around desperately for his lost girlfriend. He sighed and came to sit next Bella on the bed; she had to run in an effort not to be squashed. He put his head in his hands and Bella had an idea. If only she could get up to Edward's ear, she could whisper in his ear and then he would know that she was now a human pipsqueak.
Bella hitched herself up onto Edward's belt which was about a Bella-metre up from the mattress and grabbed a handful of his shirt. Edward straightened up, was there a fly on his back? Bella tumbled back onto the bed, rolling away in a ball. She straightened up, a determined frown adorning her face which was now the size of a drawing pin and marched towards Edward grabbing hold of his belt once more and pulling herself up, she grabbed his shirt and pulled herself up, her legs hung limply below her. Unfortunately for Bella at that moment Edward decided that he would go and search the house again and rose from his sitting position on the bed. This put poor Bella in a very difficult position as she dangled about 50 ft above the very solid floor.
Alice was a sensible girl. She had studied physics at university, written award winning papers of the conservation of energy in the universe and almost thought up string theory twenty years before anyone was supposed to. She was rational, logical and reasonable and she therefore refused to believe that a by no means small (well in Alice's eyes anyway) eighteen year old girl had just ceased to exist in a small suburban house in Washington (an opinion not shared by Edward who was quite comfortable in believing that some force in the universe just decided he wasn't aloud to have her anymore, Edward was not rational at the best of times)
On entering Bella's apparently empty bedroom she stomped her foot causing the house to shake to its foundations. At this point the very forces of physics which she had been clutching to chose this moment of desperation to play a trick on Alice Cullen.
"Ewwwwww." Alice intoned as she removed the sticky toast, which had just fallen from apparently nowhere onto her head. Charlie's Chutney oozed all over her hands and dripped into her neat coiffure from the greasy patch on the ceiling. Alice looked up and received a face full of the stuff (Edward did not believe in food in moderation). "EWWWWW!" Alice squealed followed by a terrifying scream which Edward heard from across the house (even though he had his head in the washing basket…don't ask) and everything went black.
AN: Ok so that was a bit cliché or perhaps it is classic, yeah, if it's not broke don't fix it right? …..REVIEWS PEOPLE PLEASE!! Ok so that was a little sad….but I am sad….good point… I am talking to myself…eh, shrug, what ya gonna do? No one is reading this anyway it's just an author's note, which I think is bad cos I could say something really wise and it would be lost to you people! Like…well I can't think of anything at the moment but there could have been some philosophical gold and you would never know, well I guess YOU would cos you're reading this but…ok now I've confused myself….geez not again!