Chapter twenty-three. So…*awkward silence* how is everybody?

Bella grabbed a fistful of my hair, guiding my lips back to hers. Our lips pressed together once more, I ran my tongue along her bottom lip as they parted for me and my tongue slipped inside.

We should've stopped there.

We really should've. But we didn't. We carried on. Too lost in the moment. Too carried away.

Getting too carried away with Bella was great, I had to admit. I didn't really care about anything. It had all faded away. I had no worries. I had no troubles. Bella made this for me. She made this perfect little world where it would just be us. No one else. Nothing else. Just us. And we could do what we wanted. Feel what we wanted. She made a brilliant safe cocoon for us. We were safe here. We were secure.

Bella ripped off my shirt and crashed our lips back together. Our kisses were getting urgent and our bodies were heating up. My hands roamed under her top, caressing and touching every single piece of soft flesh I could feel. I gasped out from her kiss, needing to breathe unfortunately.

"I love you Edward", whispered Bella looking straight into my eyes. I was lost. I was falling. Her words stunned me.

"I love you too", I said without hesitation, "so much Bella…I love you."

It was too soon. Too weird. It wasn't right in other people's eyes. We were rushing. We were too young. We didn't understand love. We were lusting.

It was hormones…

Whatever excuse any would come up with was absolute crap. Who said people couldn't fall in love at this age? Who said it was just lust and not love? Who said we were rushing into things?

They were wrong. We weren't.

Ok, so maybe we were acting on lust at the current moment, but it was too late to stop. Besides, I didn't want to stop. I didn't want this to end. I kissed up and down Bella's neck. Tasting every piece of her. Biting and sucking at bits. Nibbling on her skin. On of her hands were in my hair, gripping a fistful of hair and pulling. The other ran up and down my chest, sending waves of pleasure through me. I couldn't think of anything else that didn't have to do with Bella.

I pressed down on her, to feel her body. She wriggled under me, positioning herself so she could wrap both her arms around my neck to pull me down.

Our lips met once more and moulded against eachother. I felt her hot breath on my skin. Her spicy touch and her soft skin.

Bella's POV.

A small high pitched gasp made both Edward and I freeze.

There, in the doorway stood the person I did not want to be caught by. My breath quickened and my face blushed bright red. This was not good.

Edward quickly untangled his body from me, I grabbed his shirt, which was right next to me and handed it over to him. He pulled it on swiftly. I readjusted my clothes to look for reasonable. We sat, uncomfortable and embarrassed on the bed.

Edward took my hand and squeezed it. But somehow I didn't feel reassured. I looked up to see a disappointed face.

Esme sighed.

"Mom, I –"

"Dinner's ready", she cut in sharply. Her voice was cold. Hurt and disappointed. Almost frustrated. I bit my lip. She stared at the floor when she spoke. Her hands were at fists.

"Bella come and help me fix the table", she ordered in a more controlled voice, "Edward, can you please go ask the others to come downstairs for dinner?"

"If we could just talk about –"

"We'll talk about this later", she interrupted me again.

"Don't tell dad", I said quickly thinking of what would happen at dinner if she brought this up. I was thinking of my dad's face. I was thinking of Emmett's face…

"I won't", said my mother shrugging simply, "this has got nothing to do with him. Yet. Let's just get dinner over with please. Edward, can you get the others?"

"Yes, Mrs. Cullen", said Edward curtly. He got up and walked out of the room, sparing me a rueful glance as he did.

I looked up to my mother, feeling quite ashamed. She didn't look back at me.

"Let's go set the table", said Esme in a retired voice.

--

"Wow…who died?" muttered Emmett in between stuffing his face with a load of food. He was right though. Everybody was silent. Like somebody had died.

My dad wasn't talking cos he was in a bad mood. His team lost on TV. Esme was unusually quiet, because of what happened earlier I was presuming.

Somebody creased Alice's skirt and jasper was silently reassuring her. Edward and I were both quiet of course. The embarrassment was still etched on both our faces.

Esme knew.

She caught us!

If it was Alice or Emmett that would've been fine. They were people around my age. I was sure they knew something was up with Edward and me anyway. So they wouldn't be too surprised to see us…ok maybe they would be surprised.

If Esme had interrupted, I was sure I wouldn't be a virgin right now…

Things had gotten a little too heated up with Edward and me. I felt like I had completely lost myself. It was just he and I. There were no worries, and no problems. Everything was ok. He was in my arms. He was kissing me. He was with me.

"Bella!"

A hard kick under the table woke me up. I bit my lip to stop myself from groaning in pain. Looking to the source of the kick, Alice smiled sheepishly back at me.

"You zoned out on us", Emmett said looking at me curiously. His eyes flickered between Edward and me. "You ok, Bella?"

"Perfectly content", I said to him.

"Then why haven't you touched a thing on your plate", he shot back at me, "your fork is still clean. Look at me, I'm nearly done!"

"I'm not hungry", I told him shrugging.

"You should really eat Bella", said dad, scrutinizing me. Oh great! I was certain I'd be getting a lecture on skipping meals and looking pasty again.

"I don't want to eat", I said rather forcefully. I was sick of this. Sick of everyone acting so stupidly around me. Like I was going to break. Like I was a soap bubble that was about to burst. So what if I didn't eat dinner? It wasn't going to kill me. I would just make up for it later. It wasn't a big deal.

With a frustrated thought, I stood up and left the living room. I didn't even look back. I was tired of this. Everyone was just really getting on my nerves lately.

I was going to get in trouble with my mother later and I knew that. I didn't think she would appreciate me and Edward showing our 'physical affections' in my bedroom. Alone. Actually I don't think she knew that Edward and me even had any affection for eachother.

The phone started ringing just as I was walking past it. I paused and grabbed the receiver.

"I'll get it", shouted Emmett.

"I've got it", I called back to him and answered, "hello?"

"Bella!"

I recognised his voice immediately. My chance to talk to Mike properly suddenly appeared.

"Mike, how are you?" I asked him.

"I'm…good. You?" he replied.

"Fine. I'm ok", I said, "hey listen…about the beach. I'm sorry that Emmett towed me away like that. I wanted to talk to you but –"

"It's ok", he reassured me, "your brother's very over protective of you, isn't he?"

"Yeah, I guess so", I half laughed, "but he's not here right now, so if you wanna talk to me…"

"I don't think we should talk about this on the phone", said mike quite seriously, "come to my place. We can talk then, alright?"

I sighed as I thought about it.

"Listen mike, I know what you want and it's just not –"

"please Bella?" whispered mike on the phone, "I don't wanna force you, I just wanna talk about it. I-I love you, Bella…I'm really in love with you."

I really didn't want to do this. I didn't want to tell mike that I couldn't love him. Not since I had already practically declared my love to Edward earlier on. Not since I didn't love mike, I was in love with Edward.

"I think about you all the time", mike carried on. This wasn't helping me or him. "Can we just talk? I miss you…"

"When do you want me around your place?" I blurted out without thinking.

"Can you come now?" mike asked.

"Um…no. My parents are home and I won't be able to get out", I told him truthfully, "how about tomorrow?"

"I can't wait that long", he sighed, "let's meet up tonight!"

"My parents are still going to be here", I explained shaking my head to myself, "they're not working tonight."

"I mean tonight", mike emphasized, "at night. Sneak out and come see me."

The sooner I get this done, the better.

"I'll meet you at your place at half past midnight", I whispered to him, making sure no one could hear me, "who's home at your house?"

"Don't worry, no one is", said mike, "my parents are away for business and my sister's gone with them."

"Oh…ok. Good. See you then, mike", I said sighing, "bye…"

"Bye Bella", said mike contently, "I love you…"

I hung up the phone quickly and tried to slow down my heart rate. Why did this feel like I was committing a murder?

--

"Can I come in?" said a voice making me look up. I dropped my book and nodded. Esme walked into Alice's room and mine and closed the door. She locked it. Then approached my bed.

This was the conversation I had been dreading.

"Where's everybody?" I asked her, stalling of course.

"They're all downstairs, having dessert", she told me, "It's chocolate mousse, would you like any?"

"No thanks", I said shaking my head. Best get it over with. "So, mom, about what happened earlier…"

"I hadn't realised you and Edward were…an item", said Esme looking confused, "and I didn't mean to walk in on you like that…it was a bit shocking for me, Bella."

Her words stung me slightly.

Were Edward and I an item? He hadn't exactly asked me out or anything. He didn't ask me to be his girlfriend…

But he had said those three words. I love you. He had said it to me.

"We don't…don't normally do that", I told her quickly, "that was just a one time, we got a bit carried away and, you know."

There was a comfortable silence of which I decided to observe my nails. I waited for Esme to speak first.

"You didn't tell me that Edward was your boyfriend", she mused turning to look at me fully, "I just…presumed that he was just Emmett's friend. I though that was the reason he came around. To see Emmett, not…not you."

"He is Emmett's friend", I told her, "and…um, I'm not his official girlfriend. I mean, we're…we're not dating or anything."

There was another pause of silence. I didn't look up. The disappointed looking my mother's face wasn't something that I liked to see. I had disappointed Carlisle, Emmett and Esme too many times. I hated to see what it did to them.

"Good", she said finally. I was surprised by that reply of course.

"Good?" I repeated, "What's good?"

"The fact you aren't dating him", said Esme. She took in a deep breath and stood up, as if proving her authority over me.

"Yeah but…I mean, there's obviously something between me and Edward", I told her, blushing again, "I…I really like him, mom. And I think he likes me too. So, you know, if he asks me out I'll say –"

"No", answered Esme. Shocked as I was, I finally looked up. Her lips were pursed into a straight line. Her eyebrows furrowed. Her face pale, and looking more aged than I had ever seen it. In her eyes was anger and disappointment.

"No?"

Outrage filled me. Burned through me.

"That scene that I had caught you and Edward in earlier will not happen again", said Esme firmly, "I am absolutely repulsed and disappointed in you, Bella."

"Well, I'm sorry", I said quietly, "I didn't know that… I mean, we just got a bit carried away and –"

"That you'll never get carried away with Edward Masen again", Esme finished off. I was surprised by the way my mother was talking to me. She never spoke to me like this. I had always gotten away with things. Even though something like this had never happened before, she was always forgiving. She always understood my side.

I sighed and gave up.

"Whatever", I shrugged it off. Esme hadn't finished yet though.

"I forbid you to see him", she said, still with authority in her voice. I looked up at her, shocked once more. "You will not get involved in any type of relationship with that boy. He's too old for you, Bella."

"Too old?" I scoffed, rolling my eyes. "Mom, please. I'm going to be sixteen soon. And he's seventeen. That's only about a year's difference."

"Over two years difference actually", mom corrected tightly, "and that's too old for you. I don't like it. Teenage boys that age…like to get carried away. You can't date him."

Those words made me flip. And suddenly the rebellious side of me kicked in.

You can't date him…

"I'll date whoever I like", I told her, sitting up straighter and flipping my hair back, "and get carried away with whoever I like, thank you very much, Esme."

"It's illegal", she snapped, "You're still fifteen, Bella. And my word is final. You are NOT allowed to have a relationship with Edward. End of conversation."

She turned to leave, but that only pushed me further.

"You can't tell me what to do", I screamed at her back. Then said the words. "YOU'RE NOT MY MOTHER!"