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Citrus

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Dan takes long strides towards the place he calls home, so ancient and crumbling it looks as if no one has lived there for fifty years. It looks like that on the inside too since, unfortunately no one in the Humphrey family knows how to tidy up.

Dan sighs as he takes the old bronze key from behind the loose brick and unlocks the door.

"DAN!" Jennifer Humphrey screams as the door clicks shut. "Dan! Is that you?"

"Yes, Jen," Dan grumbles, annoyed, yet there's a hint of affection in his voice. With their mother absent from their lives and their father so enraptured in his poetry and various hobbies, Dan and Jenny are all the other has.

Bouncing down the staircase in a shirt that make her breasts look even larger than usual and jeans that make her short legs look even stubbier, Jenny races towards Dan, throwing her arms around him in a hug.

"Dan, you'll never guess what happened today?" she cries, excitedly, large brown eyes shining.

"What?" Dan answers good-naturedly. He could really care less about what idiotic thing had happened in his sister's ninth grade life, but he couldn't bear to see her frown if he dismissed her. Dan had unfortunately turned into Jenny's mother/brother. And Dan wasn't very helpful when it came to what dress went with what shoes or which nail polish was in style. He had tried to give Vanessa that job, but she seemed to know even less about all things womanly than Dan did. And Vanessa was a woman. Thoughts creep into Dan's head that if he were with Serena, she would be able to take care of all those things for Jenny. Another fantastical reason to add to the why-Serena-is-fucking-brilliant list.

"I heard something really interesting about Serena van der Woodsen," she squeals just waiting for Dan to birth a cow.

"Oh really," Dan replies coolly, as if Serena has managed to slip his mind. Which never happens.

Jenny pouts a little, upset that Dan isn't kissing her chubby cheeks with gratitude at her mysterious revelation.

"Mhmmm," Jenny mumbles, twirling around girlishly. "I heard that she's having this huge blowout this weekend. Her parents are gonna be out of town and she's throwing a party with her brother Eric who's back from college for the weekend."

"Oh," Dan says, grabbing some coffee mix and fixing himself a cup. "Sounds nice."

Jenny stares at him appalled. " 'Oh' 'Sounds nice'. Are you serious? That's all you're gonna say!"

"Jen," Dan sighs sipping his coffee even though it's burning his tongue. "I appreciate the info. But it's really not like I could ever go."

Jenny opens her mouth as if to speak, but is interrupted by a knocking at the door.

Jenny sashays over to the window and peers through the dusty, plum-colored curtains. Her eyes widen. Oh no.

Is it Serena? No, it couldn't possible be Serena. Well, maybe. Does she know anyone in Brooklyn? What a stupid question, of course she doesn't. But maybe… Oh shut up!

"What is it?" Dan questions, breathlessly, feeling slightly nauseous. He gingerly places his coffee mug down on the old wooden counter and takes small, quick steps towards Jenny.

"A limo!" Jenny says with astonishment, her voice swimming with confusion and disbelief.

"What?" Dan feels as if his coffee is going to come shooting back out of his throat. Would it still be hot?

More knocking comes from the door and Dan jumps. Racing over to the door, he yanks it open.

What the fuck?

It's Chuck!

--

"Wh-what are you…?" Dan spits out, stumbling over his words.

"I can't believe you don't have a doorbell!" Chuck exclaims as he invites himself in, his shiny shoes gliding against the ancient wooden floors. "And wow," Chuck says, his eyes scanning the place briefly before resting his eyes on Jenny. "And who is this?"

"My sister, Jenny," Dan says irritated. Jenny throws Chuck a sweet smile and he grins back devilishly.

"Pleasure," Chuck says sauntering up to Jenny and kissing her hand, causing her to giggle.

Dan rolls his eyes. "Why are you here?"

Chuck turns around to face Dan as if he forgot he was even there.

"Oh, right. Down to business," Chuck says with a dashing smile. "I came to invite you to Serena's soiree tomorrow evening. Should be fabulous."

Dan's mouth threatens to drop, but he holds his jaw tight and says calmly. "But why Chuck?"

Chuck frowns for a second and then his face brightens as if he was not supposed to be sad, as if this were all an act. "You'll see," he answers, his voice bittersweet and vulnerable. Recovering, he adds sleazily, "Your sister is welcome to attend as well."

Behind them, Jenny claps her hands and jumps up and down in a fit of pure joy and dashes up the stairs, exclaiming about finding something to wear.

Chuck grins and places his manicured hand on the brass doorknob. "Oh, but Daniel. Can we make one thing clear? You are there for Serena and Serena only. Understood."

"I'll talk to whomever I please," Dan says boldly.

Chuck sighs, almost defeated. "Fine, chat with whomever, I don't care. Just remember Serena ok?"

"Ok," Dan repeats, puzzled.

"Good afternoon, Daniel," Chuck says formally as he exits the door.

Dan walks over to the window without saying goodbye and watches as Chuck's scarf flutters in the breeze before ducking into the long dark limo and driving off.

What did Chuck want from him? And why did he want him to focus on Serena? This all made absolutely no sense. Dan had always thought Chuck wanted Serena, but maybe not.

Dan scratches his head thoughtfully and turns back into the kitchen to collect his coffee cup. Taking a sip, Dan is pleased to see that the temperature is just right.

Suddenly feeling very exhausted both emotionally and physically, Dan walks into his bedroom and slips Vanessa's documentary tape into the VCR player.

Just as he settles onto the floor in front of his small black and white television, a dirty looking man screams "She's trying to kill me!!!!!"

Startled, Dan spills his coffee all over his trousers.

"Vanessa," he hisses angrily.