Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha, but I do own Makoto. Yay Makoto!

Chapter 38: Letting Go

Makoto lazily wrapped his arms tighter around Kita's waist as the first bit of sunlight filtered through his eyelids. He reluctantly opened them and yawned. He looked around from his spot on the tree. It had been two weeks since the final battle. Soon they would be the only ones left in the clearing. The last of the injured were now healed enough to travel back to their homes. Even the humans from the surrounding villages had started to return. The weather was nice: warm and sunny, a light breeze. But Makoto could help but sigh in sadness. Ever since that afternoon he had woken and kissed Kita, she had been standoffish to him and the others, and constantly going off on her own.

At first he just thought it was because she was embarrassed at being caught in that kind of intimacy by Shippou and Tani, but as the days passed he shot that idea. She would allow him to hold her, to hug and kiss her, but she was…unresponsive. She wouldn't even talk to the others unless they directly asked her a question, and even then she just gave her answer with no further remarks. Her eyes had become distant, and she was always gazing away as if she were looking for a way to bolt, just like the first time Makoto met her. Like she was trapped in a cage and just waiting for the door to open so she could escape. It scared Makoto. What if she wanted to leave? He wanted so much just to ask Kita what was the matter, but he was also afraid of her answer.

He couldn't fathom what he would do without Kita. He treasured her so much; he would do anything and EVERYthing for her. Makoto's brow creased in an angry frown. Did she have something she hadn't told him about? Something outside of his family and his home? Did he love her more than she loved him? It was so infuriating, not know what was on her mind. He grunted and turned his head away from her as she started to stir.

"Sleep good?" he asked.

"Yeah. You?"

Makoto huffed. "Sure." He jumped down from the tree and placed Kita on her feet. "I'm going to find breakfast. Want something?"

"No, no, thank you. I'm not really hungry." She answered without looking at him.

"Keh!" Makoto stormed off toward the trees, taking a couple of them down with him on the way. He almost felt sorry for whatever animal he smelled first. It was sure to die quickly, though.

After he retrieved enough food for everyone in the clearing for the entire day he returned. Kita sat just as she had for the last two weeks; looking out into the distance with a dull, dead look. He sat down on the opposite side of the campfire and started putting his kill on sticks or tossing it into a stew pot for later. Kita stood to her feet just as Makoto was about to ask if she had changed her mind about the food. She looked toward him.

"I'm going for a walk."

Makoto's ears drooped. "Alright. Fine." He turned to the fire, but turned back as she started to leave, "Are you coming back?" With each second ticking by, Makoto's heart fell deeper into the black pit Kita had given him. She looked back at him, calculating; she had to think about her answer. That meant she really was thinking of leaving. Would she leave now? Just like that?

"Yeah. I'll be back." She finally stated.

Makoto could only nod as he watched Kita leave and he tried to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat. Suddenly he wasn't so hungry anymore. He took the food he had cooked to the tiger-youkai family that was now packing to leave after the father's leg had finally healed enough for him to make the journey. There was little else for him to do now but sit around and wait. Makoto tried to find something to keep him busy. He threw back the flaps of the tent and walked in to find Kagome helping Tani and Shippou pack.

"Good morning, Makoto." She said over her shoulder as she stuffed a blanket into Tani's bag. "Could you help InuYasha get everything packed for Gina and Mehiji? Tani and Takeshi can been moved now, and I think it's best we get them back to the village as soon as we can. InuYasha said he thinks a storm is coming from the mountains."

"I'll get right to it, Okaa." InuYasha and Miroku were busy trying to get things together for the trip back to the village. Sango and the girls were entertaining the pups while Kirara was being loaded with bags.

"'koto!" Gina leapt from Sango's arms and wobbled over to her older brother. She grabbed hold of his leg and started clawing her way up.

Makoto laughed and reached down to pick her up. "Whoa, pup. What you in a rush for?"

"'koto!" she clung to his haori.

"What has gotten into her?" Sango asked.

Makoto shook his head. "No idea. What's wrong with you, Gina?"

"'ita leave, 'koto leave!"

He cringed. "Gina, if she leaves it's her choice. Plus," he looked toward the forest, "she promised she'd come back."

"Kita left?" Sango asked with a curious expression.

"She's been acting strange, Oba. Brushing me off and leaving on her own." He scoffed and turned his head, Gina whined in his arms. "We were fine. I thought everything was finally over and she could live the life she wanted. I thought since Haru was gone, she would settle down and… just live. I thought I could give her the life she deserved."

"Makoto, you can't just decide for her. What if she doesn't want the same life you want? I know it sounds harsh, but she may have other plans. Kita is for once in her life completely free, and she might want to find what she wants." Sango paused and rubbed Makoto's back. "You may love her, and she may love you, but how can she truly know her own thoughts if someone is always giving her directions?"

Makoto cringed. "I'm being selfish…aren't I?" he asked mostly to himself, then sighed. "Right. So, no matter what she decides, no matter if she stays…" he gulped, "or leaves, I have to support her decision? I have to show her that it's alright for her to take charge of her own life, even if that means I'm not part of it." His voice faltered at the end.

Sango continued to rub his back and nodded. "Sometimes… fate deals a lose/lose situation, and you either hurt someone, or hurt yourself."

"Yeah…" he nodded, "yeah, I got that much." Makoto cursed under his breath. He kept his voice angry to hide the pain and fear he felt. "So I just let her walk away."

"I can't answer for you, or Kita, for that matter." Sango gave Makoto one more comforting pat on the back and turned away, leaving Makoto holding Gina.

"'ita goooooo…" she whined, ears drawn back.

Makoto pushed back his own emotions and smirked down at the pup. "I'm here. Okaa's here, Otou, Shippou, Oba, Oji, Mehiji, we're all here."

"'ita! 'koto!" Makoto turned Gina in his arms so she would be facing him. She continued to cry out, but her silver eyes were distant, not focusing on him.

"Oi!" InuYasha nearly made Makoto jump out of his skin, he was so intent on Gina's actions and screams. InuYasha took the pup from Makoto and nuzzled the top of her head until her cries melted down. He raised his head to glare at Makoto. "What made her so upset?"

"Kita left for awhile. I guess Gina is just worried she won't come back." It wasn't a lie, but it also wasn't the complete truth. Makoto didn't feel like going against InuYasha on the subject of the she-wolf, especially at the present moment.

"You better go looking for her if she's not back, soon. We're going home as soon as everyone is ready." He stated and he slung Gina on his shoulder. She let out a squeal and laughingly grabbed at InuYasha's hair. InuYasha smirked, releasing the girl and letter her fall halfway to the ground before gently catching her and setting her down on her feet. She wobbled a few steps before falling on her back-side and laughing.

"Gina!" her twin launched himself at her and the two went rolling. Makoto watched as InuYasha started to chase the two around the clearing. Kita returned just as the others were getting ready to head back to the village. She was as silent as ever as she stood by Makoto's side. He sighed and grabbed her hand as they started the journey.

It took them a few days to make it back to the village. Sango, Miroku and the girls had to walk since Tani and the new kit were riding Kirara back, and that caused them to slow down a great deal. Makoto didn't mind so much. The closer they got to the village, the more he felt like he was losing Kita. The others had taking up a habit of glancing back at the two during the trip; they could obviously feel some sort of tension between the couple.

"Home! Home, home, home, home…" Kagome started chanting as soon as the rice fields of the village were in view. Mehiji squirmed from her arms and started running down the hills, followed by his sister. InuYasha snuck up behind Kagome, using one arm around the back of her knees and the other behind her shoulders to sweep her off her feet and twirl her around. She squeaked her surprise before laughing and punching his shoulder. "Arrogant hanyou!" InuYasha growled playfully. Makoto looked away disgusted when the two started kissing in the broad daylight for every villager in the fields to see.

Miroku, Sango, and the girls bade their farewell as they made their way to see Mai in the village before going to their own hut. Kirara took to the air, taking Shippou, Tani, and their little-one to their hut before returning to Sango. Makoto walked silently with Kita in tow to his hut. He dropped her hand as they got in view, and she steered herself to still along by the pond. Makoto cursed under his breath, nearly making the door slide out of the wall when he entered the hut and made a bee-line to his room.

He slammed his door shut, the frame cracking in the process, which caused Makoto to curse to himself. He banged his fist into a wall, creating a hole in the bamboo. Okay, so his Okaa and Oyaji were going to be a little peeved at the destruction he was causing. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. It was already late into the afternoon, the sun starting to fall behind the trees. Every muscle in his body was tense under the pressure. His hands fidgeted with any object within reaching distance, unsure of what to do. Makoto looked across the pond where Kita sat cross-legged, staring off into space. She stood, and started walking along the side of the water. The sunbeams reflected off the water and onto her face, making her glow in the darkening atmosphere. Makoto noticed she was slowly making her way to the hut. He guessed he should have been relieved that she wasn't just walking away, but his stomach was uneasy.

"Oi! What did you do?!" Makoto could hear InuYasha yelling as he entered the hut, obviously seeing the busted door.

"Don't yell at him, InuYasha, he's having a hard enough time as it is." He heard his Okaa's soothing voice. The main door slid open once again, and the outer room grew quiet. A moment later there was a soft knock on his door. He ran his fingers through his hair once again before walking over and shuffling the broken door open. Kita was standing before him, her facial features carefully nonchalant.

"Makoto, I need to talk to you." Makoto was dismayed that her voice was also free from emotion.

"Alright." He replied, leading against door frame that creaked in protest.

Makoto could see a flicker of emotion run through her eyes as she thought. "Maybe we should go outside…" Makoto shoved off from the wall and lead the way outside without a word. As they passed the main room, he could feel the eyes of his parents following him and Kita, but he didn't look at them as they passed through and into the evening air. He walked awhile, and was surprised to find that he stopped under Goshinboku. He leaned up against the tree and waited.

"Makoto…"

"Why are you leaving?" he interrupted her. She looked startled at first, then her eyes fell.

"It's something I have to do, Makoto."

"Why?! I thought you wanted to stay here! I thought you liked being with me!"

"I do!"

"Then why are in such a rush to leave?!"

"Because for once in my life I have a chance to prove my worth!" she yelled back, then sighed and shook her head. "I'm the leader of my pack now. Only three remain loyal to my father, but those three are my responsibility. I can't just… abandon them."

"But you'll abandon me?" Confusion swept across her face at Makoto's reply. Makoto turned and took a few steps away, shaking his head, before turning back around. "You can't just leave, not like this. Not after…" he sighed.

"I'm sorry." After a short silence Kita spoke. "I've been going though this in my head for days, and I didn't see any other way around but to just do it. The pack can't live here in the village, we have to go back."

Makoto rushed forward and wrapped his arms around her waist. Kita laced her arms around his neck and laid her head on his shoulder. He nuzzled his nose to her neck before bringing his lips to her ear. "Then let me go with you." He whispered.

Kita tried to pull back but Makoto had his arms tightly wound around her. She tilted her head back and stared into his eyes. "I can't ask you to leave you're family, Makoto. That wouldn't be fair to you, or to them."

"I let you choose! I let you decide to leave! I could have approached you and tried to change your mind, but I didn't! I let you make up your own mind, and I've made my choice. I'm going with you." Makoto paused, slightly shaking his head. "If you want me to go with you, I will." Kita surprised him. Instead of trying to argue with him like he thought, Kita instead put a strangle hold on his neck and wrapped her legs around his waist. He cackled. "I guess I can take that as a yes?"

Makoto finished packing the last of his and Kita's belongings into a bag. He checked his room once more for anything he might want to bring along. Memories flooded back to him as he stared.

"Shippou!" A younger Makoto squealed as the youkai flopped on top of him, squishing him between Shippou's back and the futon.

Shippou laughed and ruffled the trapped Makoto's hair. "Say it, little brother!"

"Augh!" Makoto pushed, kicked, clawed, and bit at Shippou, trying to get the older youkai off of him.

"Say 'Shippou is the best brother in the world' and you can go."

Makoto laughed to himself. He would have been stuck under Shippou for hours if Kagome hadn't heard his complaints and made Shippou get off of him. He turned and headed to the main room, shutting the still broken door behind him, where even more memories flooded him mind.

InuYasha cursed under his breath as the sun finally set, leading into a newmoon night. Kagome worked on keeping the fire roaring in the pit, as Makoto whimpered by her side. There was a strong wind blowing through the hut as Shippou came through the door with a load of firewood, shrugging snow off of his shoulders as he closed it behind him and dropped the firewood down by the pit.

"I think it's getting worse out there." He stated.

"K-keh." InuYasha tried to hide the fact that in his human form he was freezing.

"I think we have enough for the rest of the night, Shippou, you come over here and warm back up." Shippou nodded, picking Makoto up and setting him down in his lap and snuggling under the blanket with Kagome. InuYasha sat behind Kagome, wrapping his arms around her and pulling as close as he could.

Makoto smiled sadly and shook his head. That had been one long night. He was only two and still cried like a baby on his human nights. That night would have been the one of the worst, but it wasn't. The four of them had stayed cuddled up by the fire all night. He also remembered the multiple times either him or Shippou had ended up butt first into that fire pit in one of their many wrestling matches. He remembered in later years InuYasha had ended up in it a few times himself.

Makoto slid open the door to the outside and stepped out. Kagome was sitting by the pond, along with InuYasha and Kita, playing with the pups. Sango, Miroku, the girls, along with Kirara, Shippou, Tani and their new kit sat around with them. They all turned as Makoto made his presence known.

"We should get going." He stated after a few minutes of awkward silence.

Mai was the first one up. She ran and threw her arms around Makoto. "You better come back to see us soon, Makoto."

"I will." Hana, Yumi, and Cho all rushed him as soon as Mai backed away. Sango and Miroku walked up to him at the same time, each saying their 'goodbyes' in their own way, and then prying the girls away.

Shippou was the next up. Makoto combed his fingers through his hair and gave a sad smirk. This was his big brother. The guy who tortured him to death as a kid, the guy who was always there when he need him. Shippou threw his arms around Makoto's shoulders, Makoto doing the same, and squeezed tight.

"Take care of yourself, Makoto." He said, finally pulling away. "And Kita." Makoto only nodded, afraid his voice would crack too much for him to be able to speak. Kagome set down Mehiji and Gina, who ran and grabbed at his legs. Makoto smiled and bent down to his knees.

"Moto gooooo…." Mehiji whimpered.

"'koto…" Gina echoed.

"Hey, I'm not leaving forever. I'm going to come back and see you two as often as I can." He bent lower and whispered to them, "You two have to watch Okaa and Oyaji while I'm gone. Make sure they stay out of trouble."

"Kay!" Mehiji nodded.

Gina nuzzled into Makoto's side and mumbled, "Kay." InuYasha was next. He picked up the pups and slid them into one arm. Makoto stood to his feet and cleared his throat.

"Well, you always knew I would leave eventually." He joked. InuYasha didn't crack a smirk as he awkwardly hugged Makoto with his one free arm.

"Keep out of trouble." He said with all honesty. Then he lightened up, "I don't wanna be going all that way north to bail you out of anything.

Last up was Kagome. She walked toward Makoto slowly and thoughtful. When she reached him she wrapped her arms around his neck and let out a long, shaky sigh. "I guess I should have known this was coming."

"Okaa…"

"I know, I know. You'll be back. I shouldn't worry. But, you're my baby," Makoto rolled his eyes, "and it's just so far away." She pulled back and put her hands on his shoulders, looking him directly in his eyes with her tear-filled ones, "Just promise you'll come visit whenever you can, as often as you can, as many times as you can, for as long as you can."

Makoto laughed sadly and nodded. "As often as possible, as long as possible. Got it." Kagome gave him a quick kiss on the cheek then turned and ran into InuYasha's waiting arms. Kita then came and grabbed Makoto's hand, looked up at him, and smiled. "We better get going, then." He stated.

Makoto took one more look around, said his final goodbyes, and started on his journey. It would be a long road for him and Kita. Two hanyou leading a wolf pack of three. There was also the possibility that the rest of the pack would come seeking revenge. Makoto turned to Kita and swept her off her feet and into his arms, twirling her around with a huge grin on his face. Kita laughed and latched her arms around his neck, pulling his head down so she could reach his lips. So much was said between the two in just that one kiss. The promise of a life together, the promise of a future; the start of a family of their own. Who knows what would happen?

A/N:

Only the epilogue left. ::tear::

It's been a longgg and hard road. I've been in school, work, and in and out of the hospital all throughout this thing. I hope I haven't let anyone down, and I hope that everyone enjoyed at least part of the story. I do plan on another fic, but no release date planed just yet. To all my faithful reviewers, I lubs you!