Shibara1310 enters, seeming slightly mad at herself or someone else…but, nevertheless, she is mad. She has her book in hand and walks, or more likely, stomps, to her favorite chair in the center of the dark room.
Shibara: Hey! Yes, I am mad! I just found out something! And I'm pissed! God, why am I so stupid….Yes! I admit I'm stupid! Today is going to be yet another long chapter because we have a lot to discuss! I also have a piggy back ride with Cloud…heh…we will not have any songs today, but we will in the next chapter. This chapter is about homemade mints, reviews, why this thing is called 'Pikachu Diaries', and Yaoi! Yes, I talk about Yaoi! In other words, Zelda…heh…
Disclaimer: I do not own any of this! I don't own Pikachu, even though he is my pet, I don't own FFVII or any of the characters, though I wish I owned Cloud, my personal chocobo, Zack and Genesis, but I don't, I don't own any of the songs I mention in here, and I don't own the game Zelda, if I did, Sheik would be Zelda in disguise as a mysterious girl! So there!
Mints, Reviews, and Zelda
Shibara enters room, with Cloud giving her a piggy back ride.
Shibara: I told you that you had to be my personal chocobo for the day! All you have to do is carry me around for this whole chapter!
Cloud:….
Zack: Hey, Shibara, why ain't everyone else here? There's only me, Cloud and you!
Shibara: Because I trust you guys the most with what I'm gonna talk about! Anyways, we gotta talk about a lot of stuff!
Zack: Oh joy…
Cloud: So...why aren't we doing the songs in this chapter?
Shibara: Because, dumbass! We have a lot to talk about! By the way...Tifa and Yazoo are gonna do a duet in the next chapter!
Zack snickers: Oh really?
Shibara: Yes! Really! But I ain't pairing them up!
Cloud: Thank God…ugh, you're heavier than I thought…
Shibara kicks him: You moron! Well, anyways, we're gonna talk about something I just found out!
Zack: What?
Shibara: First of all, let me tell everyone what I think about Zelda…
Cloud:…..
Shibara: Sheik is NOT a guy! That is gross! They have Yaoi stories with Link and Sheik! It is NOT Yaoi! SHEIK IS ZELDA!!!!
Zack: You are one strange human being…
Cloud:…I always thought Sheik was a guy…
Shibara: NO! You bastards!
Zack:…I am officially hurt…::sniff::
Shibara: Whatever….well, Zelda can turn into Sheik, and Sheik is in disguise. God! I've played the game! Anybody should know that Sheik is Zelda is disguise!
Zack:….don't people say that Zelda has powers that can turn herself into a guy?
Shibara: Who the Hell would want to do that?!?!
Cloud: It's called magic…
Shibara: That's gross, though!
Zack: Well….it's a strange game, but still, Sheik is a guy. Zelda is a princess who turned herself into Sheik as a disguise!
Shibara pouts and wraps her arms around Cloud's neck: But I always heard that Sheik was just a name she used when she was disguised as Sheik…and that she dressed up as Sheik! Hello? The hair! And everything else! I'm just so mad….
Zack: Why? Because you were wrong?
Shibara shoots him death glare: NO! Well, yes…but still! I have a point!
Cloud slightly choking from Shibara's grasp: Well, you can still imagine that Sheik is just a disguise and not a sex-change…
Zack: Yeah...and you're wrong! You can tell Sheik is totally a guy...
Shibara:...how?
Zack: Well, first of all, he's a different person because his eyes are crimson. And he has a man's chest. You can tell...
Shibara:...I just never really paid much attention to that...
Zack: Yeah...you moron.
Shibara: Whatever…well, anyways, let's come back to this subject later! Homemade mints!
Zack blinks: What?
Shibara: I wanna talk about homemade mints!
Cloud: Why?
Shibara: Because they're yummy! They're actually like homemade girl scout mint cookies…
Zack: OOOH!!!!!!!! YUMMY!
Shibara: Wow, Zack, I didn't know you were a fan of those cookies…
Zack: YES! I love them! How do you make them?
Shibara, simply as possible: RITZ crackers.
Zack: Oh ew! I hate those!
Shibara: Okay, here try this mint::throws Zack a cookie::
Zack eats it: Yummy!
Shibara: They're made from RITZ crackers!
Zack: I still don't understand…
Cloud: Okay, Shibara, can you get off? This is awkward…
Shibara: NO!
Cloud:…it just looks wrong…
Zack: Don't change the subject! How do you make them?
Shibara: Well, you melt minty chocolate in a pot, and then dip RITZ crackers in them! While they're still wet, you get crushed peppermints and sprinkle it on top of the cookies! They're uber yummy!
Cloud:….'Uber'?
Shibara: It's another word for 'super'.
Cloud:…oh…
Zack: Mmhhmm, they're yummy!
Shibara: Great! I have a whole box!
:::Fifty cookies later, consumed by Zack:::
Zack: I think I'm gonna throw up…..unnh……
Shibara: See? Aren't they great!
::Zack runs off to the bathroom and throws up::
:::30 minutes later:::
Zack: I'm NEVER eating girl scout cookies EVER again!
Shibara, still on Cloud: Oh, come on, you just shouldn't eat 50 of them in the course of five seconds…
Cloud: Um…Shibara?
Shibara: What is it?
Cloud: You said, 'Shibara still on Cloud.' That just sounded so wrong….
Shibara: Oh…okay, then, 'Cloud still giving Shibara a piggy back ride!'
Cloud: It still sounds wrong…
Shibara: Oh shut it! People know what we mean! They aren't perverted like we think they are!
Zack: Actually, yeah, some are…
Shibara throws her book at him, hitting him squarely on his face: SHUT UP! Anyways, next we have to talk about reviews!
Cloud: Ain't that against the rules of FanFiction?
Shibara: Oh yeah….well, we won't exactly be talking directly about a certain review! Okay? Okay, people, SUE ME! I dare you!
Zack: Now, now, Shibara, don't taunt them…
Shibara: I take it back. Okay, well, a few days okay some psychopathic maniac flamed forgiven4ever's story!
Zack:…she said 'flames welcome with open arms'….
Cloud: Yeah. People can flame if they want…
Zack: Totally.
Shibara hits Cloud on top of his head: NO! Flames are okay! This was WRONG!
Zack: How wrong?
Shibara: Okay, the dude went on and on and on and used difficult words and said, 'you've been elected as the worst story'. And he was mean! It was awful!
Zack types it up on computer and reads it: Hey, Shibara is right, he is a psychopathic maniac…I'd call him a dickhead, though…
Shibara: Don't use that language!
Zack: Well, it's true! This guy probably copied and pasted it on random stories and he basically has no life!
Cloud reads over Zack's shoulder: Yeah…
Zack: What did your sister say to him?
Shibara: She said, 'Aw, thanks for your helpful opinion! I'll be sure to take your advice when I do my other chapters! Remember: Jesus loves you even when everyone else thinks you're an asshole. God bless!'
Silence…
Zack: Oh man, he's gonna hate her for that…holy shit!
Shibara: What?
Zack: He called her a horrible author that came up with a piece of shit story! And that the grammar was bad!
Shibara: Yeah.
Zack: There are more stories out there that don't have good grammar at all and barely any detail, but we still love them!
Shibara: Yeah, I know. Like my stories!
Zack:…
Cloud: Well, flames are still allowed…
Shibara: Yes, but read my review…
Zack: Hahahaha….wow.
Shibara: What?
Zack slaps her: You said the 'f' word flat out?! Shibara, how dare you! You NEVER use that word!
Shibara: I was pissed.
Cloud: Okay…well, let's just forget that…
Zack: Yeah, I bet he's reading this right now and thinking of many ways to kill you…
Shibara: I didn't think of that…
Shibara scratches Cloud's head.
Cloud: What the hell are you doing!?!?!?
Shibara: What? You're supposed to scratch a chocobo's head!
Cloud: FOR GOD'S SAKE, I AINT A CHOCOBO!!!!!!
Shibara sniffs: Oh well….Ooh!
Zack: What?
Shibara: Special thanks to punkiemonkie for encouraging me!
Zack: Oh yeah! Punkiemonkie is a Pikachu fan! Oh crap…
Pikachu enters: Pika!
Shibara: Pikachu likes punkiemonkie! You get a homemade girl scout cookie! Unless you don't like cookies…well, if you don't, you get a Pikachu plushie!
Zack: Why not a Zack plushie?
Cloud: Or a Cloud plushie?
Shibara hits him again: Because punkiemonkie is a Pikachu fan!
Pikachu::purrs:: Squeek!
Zack: By the way, Shibi, why is this thing called Pikachu Diaries?
Shibara: Because I said so! And I like Pikachu!
Zack: But you're not even a Pokemon fan…
Shibara: I am too! Well, I just don't know much about it…I love Pikachu though!
::Pikachu jumps on top of Cloud's head and cuddles against Shibara::
Shibara: Okay, this is an awkward picture…
Cloud:….
Zack: Well, that's not a good enough reason!
Pikachu: PIKA-CHU::lightning bolt in the distance::
Zack: Okay, okay! The name is awesome! I bow to my knees and worship it!
Shibara: You #$!!!!!!!! That is so freaking retarded!
Zack: I was kidding...
Shibara: Good! Or I would've seriously perverted your image with Sephiroth!
Zack: Oh my gosh, that is gross…
Cloud:…That reminds me…
Shibara: What?
Cloud: Why are we talking about Yaoi in this chapter?
Shibara: Because it brings us back to the SheikxLink love stories.
Zack: Ew….
Shibara: Exactly! Unless Sheik really is Zelda...people, say so in your reviews if I am wrong. I'm still VERY confused about it...
Silence...
Zack: Why do they pair me up with Cloud and Sephiroth, anyways? I don't like them! I love Aeris!
Shibara pouts: Even when she dumped you?
Zack: Yeah!
Cloud: Watch it…
Zack growls…
Shibara: Now boys, don't fight…
Zack jumps on Cloud and knocks Shibara over. The two guys fight.
Shibara: THAT'S ENOUGH::Lightning cracks across the room and Pikachu looks evil::
Zack and Cloud got up and brushed themselves off.
Shibara: Zack, tomorrow you're gonna give me a piggy back ride as my personal chocobo.
Zack: WHAT?!? My hair doesn't even look like a chocobo like Emo Boy here!
Cloud:…..
Shibara: You're hair sticks up! Besides, you can play act as a black chocobo. They're cooler! And that was NOT a racist remark because I ain't a racist!
Zack:….
Cloud:…..
Pikachu:….pika…..meow….pika….
Shibara:…okay, back to where we were…
Cloud: Do I still have to carry you?
Shibara; Yes!
Shibara hops on Cloud's back again with Pikachu in her arms.
Shibara: ANYWAYS, back to Yaoi…
Zack: I think Sephy is the most evil man ever and I think it's gross that they pair me up with him! I mean, if I was gay, I would go for someone who was nice and funny like I am!
Shibara:…okay, that is a disturbing thing to think about…
Cloud:….yeah….
Shibara: You don't even look gay! But I can see why they would pair you and Cloud together…
Cloud blushes and Zack looks pissed.
Shibara: Okay I take that back…
Zack: Okay, about Sheik and Yaoi: Let people pair up gay couples, but I am still in love with Aeris and Cloud is straight as any straight man you'll meet! And Sheik is a guy. Besides, Link and Zelda just go together. Don't try to make Link gay with Sheik. Well, you can, but it's just weird because the only one for Link is Zelda. Sheik has no one! I think…
Shibara: Oh, then I'm in love!
Cloud:…then how do you explain with you thinking Sheik was a girl?
Zack: Oh my God! Shibara is Yuri!
Shibara throws Pikachu at him and Pikachu attacks him.
Shibara: Don't you DARE say that again, you impetuous disgrated gollyfoggin fraplestering Pyongyang!
Zack:…okay, I take it back…
Cloud: Yeah…but still…
Shibara: That goes to you too, chocobo!
Zack: So, you're just saying 'I'm in love' as a joke, right?
Shibara: Yeah! God, oh God, help me…I'm surrounded by idiots…
Cloud: I resent that…
Shibara: Sometimes you have to take in the truth…
Zack:….okay…
Shibara: Enough of this! We gotta talk about what songs we're gonna do in the next chapter!
Zack: I got an idea for Kadaj…
Shibara: We are not picking on him! Even though I think he is gay, no….
Zack: Aw man…I was thinking of 'Barbie Girl' by Homegrown…
Shibara:…that is perfect…we can have the silver haired men sing that…
Zack: Even Sephy?
Shibara thinks for a moment: No, for some reason I don't think him as a sissy or girly or anything. I mean, I know he has long hair, but he's awesome!
Cloud:…you like him?
Shibara: Oh my gosh, ew, no. I meant as a fighter! And he sounds like a guy!
Zack: That's true…Kadaj sounds like a ….fog, was it?
Shibara: Yeah, he is a fog.
Cloud:…okay….that's kinda mean…
Shibara: It's my story, and I can call him whatever I please!
Zack: Okay…I think Aeris should sing 'Bad Boy' by Cascada…
Shibara: Yeah, the song fits her…
Cloud: HEY!
Shibara: Well, think about it, genius!
Cloud:….
Zack: Yeah! Rock on! Okay, what else?
Shibara: Cloud, Reno, Vincent and Sephiroth are gonna sing 'SexyBack' by Justin Timberlake.
Cloud: Oh NOO!!!!! I hate that song!
Shibara looks down: Oh come on, the song kinda fits you…..
Cloud:….okay, this whole situation is awkward!
Shibara: What?
Cloud:…I dunno….
Shibara: Oh…I get it…
Zack: Oh! Hahahah! That's so funny!
Cloud: Shut up…
Zack:….
Shibara:…I don't know if I should have Vincent and Sephiroth sing…I mean, its kinda funny if you think about them…
Zack: Oh gross…
Cloud: Hear, hear…
Zack: Wait..what about Yuffie and Genesis? And Tifa?
Shibara: Well, Tifa and Yuffie can sing with Aeris and I don't want you or Genesis singing any songs.
Zack: Oh, why not?
Shibara: I have my reasons! And whatever I say goes.
Zack: Fine.
Cloud: Why do I have to do that stupid song…..
Shibara: Because I said so!
Zack: Wait, you said Tifa and Yazoo are gonna do a duet…
Shibara: Yeah, that's a surprise. Now, I think we should end this chapter…we covered about everything, even though it wasn't that random…
Cloud:…it was flat out wrong…
Zack:….kinda, yeah…
Shibara:…okay…
Shibara jumps off of Cloud with Pikachu.
Cloud: STOP SAYING THOSE THINGS!!!!
Shibara: Well, what do you want me to say? Something like, 'Shibara's piggy back ride has ended'?
::Cloud walks off saying nothing::
Shibara: What did I do?
Zack: He's just embarrassed.
Shibara: What's so embarrassing about a piggy back ride?
Zack: Well, let's just say he takes it the wrong way…
Shibara: Oh! Ew, that is gross….
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Okay….that was weird….I was tired and not in any mood to think of any random remarks so I made it a discussion with my two favorite guys! Well, I would've put Genesis in it, but he was busy taking a shower!
Yeah….if I'm wrong about Sheik, tell me. I am completely confused about it…
Next chapter:
Sing along! And Tifa and Yazoo! No, not pairing up….