DISCLAIMER: I still don't own owt

CHAPTER 4

*Dedicated to the memory of Michael Jackson.

Love him or hate him, we'll never forget him

MEMORIES IN GOLD

Oh Rocky… what have they done to you?

Laying deathly still before me you look so fragile… I want to reach down and touch you, comfort you but I'm afraid that you'll break beneath my finger tips.

I look at your pale skin glistening with perspiration and I can't believe that it's really you.

How could anyone do this to you?

I can hear Tommy and Jason arguing in the background but I push their voices from my mind. I don't have time for this right now and it sickens me that they do but all I want now is you and me… how we were… how we've always been

What was I thinking when I left here? I was so caught up in me and my history and trying to find myself… I want to laugh when I think back, what on earth did I go looking for? Why didn't I realise that I'd found everything I would ever need when I was just 10 years old?

My fingers are just inches from the soft hair I can see spilling out of your destroyed helmet but I still can't bring myself to touch you as a red hot fury floods my senses.

That helmet was supposed to protect you!

The one that has split so easily was supposed to stop this from happening!

Zordon promised that the power would always protect us and we trusted him! … but where is he now? Where is he when we need him the way that he always needed us? If he was here I'd scream at him for allowing this to happen but he isn't and the only person I can scream at is me… for leaving you, for not being here when you needed me

Looking down at you I hear air escaping from your lungs and I try hard to summon the courage not to cry, I'm not really the kind of girl that cries… I remember my Grandmother telling me that crying was natures way of cleansing the soul but I never believed her, I always thought tears were just a way of showing the world your weakness. I get the feeling that if I was to give in to tears today I would still be fighting to stop them tomorrow and we don't have time to indulge our own feelings right now. Now, the only thing that matters is you

Come on Rocky… open your eyes, I'm here. I came all of this way because I dreamt of you… you spoke to me, do you remember? I heard your voice as though you were sitting right next to me. I felt your breath on my cheek, I felt the way you hesitated as you tried to explain what was going to happen.. To explain it in a way that wouldn't scare me. I remember the way your eyes shone as you spoke about old times, me… Adam… our tiny family of 3, you tried to tell me that he would suffer most from your sacrifice but I can't see how he could feel any worse than this.

I look across at him. He's been silently guarding you ever since I got here and his eyes shoot open every time anyone approaches you, I can see him clenching and then releasing his fists. I want to speak to him, to tell him that it's all going to be okay but I can't find it in me to lie, even though I know it would bring him some kind of comfort, and believe me I want to comfort him… he looks so lost, so frightened and helpless, I want to help him but your words still ring in my ears.

You told me that the only way Adam would fight was if he was fighting for you. After hearing his version of events I can see what you meant, you knew Adam had to fight to survive but you also knew he would never fight people he perceived to be innocent so you stood there whilst they attacked you, you let them do this to you so that Adam would fight for you and in the process save himself. You told me this was fate, that destiny had a special plan for Adam and you were more than happy to give yourself up to that plan but I just can't believe that the God I believe in could have only this terribleness in mind for you. Why would he build you strong enough mentally and physically to take up the mantle of 'Super hero' if this is how it ends? After years of protecting the weak, the end comes in a bloody… glory less, self sacrifice

I cast a glance across at Adam and I hate myself for the anger I feel.

I know this is how you said it was supposed to be, I know he wasn't supposed to save you but I can't help but feel angry at him for not just saying 'Fuck fate!" and rescuing you anyways but shame soon dampens those feelings. One look at Adam sitting across from me ,staring down at you with the blackest eyes I've ever seen tells me he fought harder for you than anyone else could have, you may be lying on the crib but Adams soul is there with you… I hope that brings you comfort, I hope you realise that you aren't alone… I hope you aren't scared

I know you explained that this was the way it had to be, and I pray to God that you will forgive me, but I can't just sit here and accept that we're going to lose you. I can't accept that everything we've been through has been for nothing.

You and Adam found me when I was 10 years old, I was shy, self conscious and insecure about who I was but you guys took hold of my hand then and in all the years that have past you never once let it go. Well I'm not about to pull away from you now Rocky, I'm not about to let your hand slip from mine so forgive me as my fingers finally make contact with the soft skin of your lips.

…I can't lose you, so I'm saying 'Fuck Fate' and I'm going to make sure we save you. If that isn't what fate had in mind then tough… we're the Power Rangers and Power Rangers don't sit back and watch as one of their team slips away from them. They rush in, fight for him and then drag him back and one way or another we're dragging you back from this

I just pray that you won't hate me for what I'm about to do…

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Trini Kwan stared at the two men before her and wondered how long they were going to argue about this.

Couldn't they see that there were more important things to be doing right now than arguing over a guy who had lost every personality trait that could have been of some use to them?

"Guys, we have got to forget about Zach, Rocky is fading right before our eyes, we have to do something, and we have to do it now!"

"Trini, I don't know why you guys can't see it but we need Zach… we need everybody!" Tommy had been sure from the beginning that any kind of successful plan would require all of the ex-Rangers participation, Jason and Trinis refusal to see that was infuriating him in a way he had never experienced before.

How could they look at Rocky lying broken before them and not realise that they needed all the help they could get?

"Zach would be no good to us even if he did have the guts to show up, he isn't the same guy that you remember. Things happened in Switzerland…" The dark looks that passed between Jason and Trini were missed by no one "I don't want to get into it, it's his story, only he has the right to tell it but he obviously isn't going to show up, so I say forget him, let's put our heads together and come up with a plan to help Rocky and get Katherine and Tanya back before it is too late" Jason crossed his arms over his wide chest defiantly, as though that was the last he expected to hear on the subject, but the look that passed between Tommy, Kimberly and Billy told him that they were going to require more of an explanation than that before they gave up their belief that Zach was integral to the success of the rescue mission

"Jason…" Kimberlys voice was small with confusion as she stood up from the step on which she had been sitting and with concerned eyes, gazed up at the man who was her oldest friend "What happened to you guys? You and Zach were practically brothers and now, when it looks as though we could lose everything, the one person that we should be able to count on to help us without hesitation is the one man you don't want anywhere near us. What's going on?"

"Kim what happened isn't important" Trinis hand came to rest on her friends arm and gained her Kimberlys full attention. "All that matters is Zach wont be coming so we have to accept that and move on… Rocky doesn't have much time"

The truth of Trinis quietly spoken words hit each person like a knife in their chest. Whether they chose to see it, accept it or ignore it, one of their closest friends was dying right before their eyes and here they were arguing about someone who didn't even care enough to turn up.

4 pairs of eyes dropped to the floor in shame and they were all too lost in their sorrowful thoughts to notice the way Adams eyes had become ablaze on hearing Trinis words. In fact, no one but Aisha saw the way he attempted to jump up from his resting place only to clutch at his side as pain ripped through him, and not one of the former Rangers was aware of him storming across the Command Centre until it was too late and he was standing just inches from Trini glaring down at her with a hatred he didn't even know he was capable of

"What did you just say?" Adams cheeks burned red as his haggard breath hit Trini in the face forcing her eyes to close in surprise.

Stepping back Trini knitted her eyebrows together in confusion but the grief that cloaked Adams features forced her retort into retreat as a forced laugh rattle past her and echoed off the walls of the Command Centre

"Sorry but did I miss the part where you qualified as a doctor? And where exactly was I when you checked him out and then came up with this insightful 'diagnosis' Dr. Kwan because as far as I can tell you guys have been too busy arguing amongst yourselves to come within spitting distance of Rocky"

"Adam I…"

"Don't tell me that you're sorry, or that you didn't mean it… because the truth is simple… you have no clue what you're talking about!"

"Adam… look at him" Trini's voice was tiny as she glanced over her shoulder, searching out Jason for back up but she found his eyes glued to the ground as he played nervously with the sleeve of his burgundy hooded sweatshirt. Realising she was alone in this, Trini considered her next words very carefully "He looks worse with every minute that passes, he needs help"

"Yeah? Well it doesn't help that his team are too busy arguing to come up with any sort of plan to actually help him. 'We need Zach' , 'no we don't need Zach' 'Yes we do need Zach', it's like we're 8 year olds and it's pathetic, okay? So I'll tell you what… I'll end this right now because in two seconds I am out that door and I will drag Zach back here by the hair if I have to"

Spinning around whilst one hand unconsciously sought out his wounded side, Adam Park was just about to head for the door of the Command Centre when a voice echoed through the emotion filled air

"By the hair huh? Good luck with that, bro"

*CHAPTER 5 Preview- There are things in life that you just don't do… making a move on Kimberly Hart whilst Tommy Oliver is in the room is one of those things