"Rainey." John knocked on the bedroom door again. He had spent most of last night just standing there pleading for her not to be mad at him. Liz had called him a fool numerous times before she finally retired. But here he was again the next morning doing the same damn thing. He ahd even had his coffee yet. "Damn it Rains!" He pounded a little harder. "I will break down this door." There was no answer. He took a step back and kicked the door down. There was a loud slam as the heavy door hit the floor and turned to splinters from the impact.
"What the hell did you just do?" Liz was wide-eyed. Her expression was shocked and maybe a little annoyed. They both stared into an empty bedroom. The bed had been neatly made, and everything was as it should be. "Geez Sherlock do you think maybe she wasn't answering because she wasn't inside the room." The placed her hands on her hips and raised an eyebrow at him. "What happened to piss her off?"
"Nothing." John mumbled. He turned away from her so she wouldn't see how red his face got. He knew he was wrong and he had no idea why he had over reacted like he had. "I'll be in the garage." He walked away from his fiancée. Leaving her utterly confused.
It seems he was not the only one with the idea. Johnny was in his stroller gumming on one of his teething toys while Rainey was under the GTO.
"Hey Johnny can you hand me a wrench." She laughed as she started sliding out from under the car. She came face to face with John who had a wrench in hand. "Umm ... hey."
"What are you doing?" He asked.
"Noticed when you were showing me the cars the other day that this one was leaking anti freeze." She explained. "So I couldn't really sleep well and got up early. Fixing cars helps me think."
"Sorry about last night" he scratched the back of his head. "I was kinda a huge jackass."
"Kinda?" She raised an eyebrow.
"Ok ... I was a gigantic jackass." He relented. "I dunno ... I ..." He started to say something but stopped and shook his head.
"Say what you were gonna." She ordered.
"It's nothing."
"If it were nothing you would have said it."
"I know it is wrong but I like you. But I have taken too much from you already." He frowned and then looked away from her.
She forced him to look at her. "What do you think you have taken away from me?" She asked.
"Look ... you are just barely twenty two and you are saddled down with a baby. I took your freedom away from you."
She laughed a little at his expense. "John, you took nothing away from me. I told you the day Johnny was born that I wasn't all parties and drinking and sex. I wanted to make something of myself and I have. I have my degree and a good job and pretty soon I am going to start my internship at the other hospital and I have the most amazing son in the world. It was my choice to carry him to term and keep him. If I didn't want him then he wouldn't be here right now. But he is very much wanted and even more loved."
"I just wish I could believe that."
"I love Johnny with everything I have in me. I vowed never to love anyone after my dad left but I fell in love with my son. And I will be damned if you try to convince yourself that he is anything but the blessing from above he is."
"I believe you now."
"Now the only person you are hurting is you. I know you by now John. You are the type of person who pleases others before himself. For once just make yourself happy. Do not think about me or Johnny or Liz. Just do something that makes you happy."
"Let's go for a drive." He suggested. He popped Johnny's carrier from the stroller and connected it to the piece that was in the car. Wiggling it a little to make sure it was connected correctly. "Where we goin?" Rainey asked getting into the passenger seat.
"Nowhere ... you said to do what makes me happy. We are going to go ninety miles an hour with Born to Run blasting on the radio." He grinned to her. She looked a little fearful. He gave her a hearty laugh. "Relax I am an excellent driver."
With that he gunned the engine. Turned up the stereo and took off.