The Prince

Chapter 15

Amanda was furious.

Upon arriving back to the fortress she quickly dismissed the guards and pulled her husband forcefully into the family wing of the massive structure.

She shut the doors, blocking off the rest of the house, and turned to face him.

"How dare you!" she hissed through clenched teeth. "It was acceptable for you to take a human wife and yet you deny that same right to your son! You give him T'Pring, two steps away from chattel and protected only because of your choice to foist her onto Spock! And in his condition! You trapped him knowing he could not resist her like he is now! When will he ever be able to choose for himself?"

Sarek regarded his wife's words, his face impassive. He did not want to acknowledge how deeply her words cut.

"It must be done. He must mate with a Vulan woman if he is to retain his position."

"The position you chose for him! He is half-human Sarek! How can you deny him love even when you yourself fully embrace it, with a human woman no less! Or is it that we humans are inadequate?"

Sarek stood silently, not answering. His silence was confirmation to his wife.

"Oh? We are inadequate? Is that it? My, my, my, the logical Vulcan that you are saw it fit to logically take a human wife who had dealt with your logical bullshit for the last thirty-two years. It was logical for you to want me right? It was logical to bring me to Vulcan. It was logical to impregnate me. Just as it was logical for you to have a half-human son and completely disregard the half of him that I am and force your logic onto him. It was logical for you to try to kill him when he went against you, just as it is perfectly logical to tell your son that marrying me was the logical thing to do!"

Sarek remained still, internally grimacing at her words, each one piercing his soul.

"You didn't want a son, you wanted a clone! I don't believe you love him. I don't believe you ever did, because if you did you would have realized a long time ago that he resents everything you are and represent! And now you trap him so that he has no choice! And you take away from him the one thing that he has the full opportunity to explore! Love!" She was shaking now, her eyes glinting with fury and hurt. But she wasn't done yet.

"You can allow yourself to experience love but deny that right to your own flesh and blood. When will you stop? When will you realize that your actions are destroying the one thing you've claimed privately that you love?"

Sarek watched his wife, now in tears. She was sobbing hard now, her lithe frame quivering in the darkened hall. His heart hurt. A deep physical pain he could not fully grasp. Through their bond he felt her emotional pain. It was becoming too much for him to sustain. But he allowed the bond to remain open. It was only fitting, he felt, that he be punished for his own transgressions.

He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came. She had never spoken such things to him. Had he really been so dense? Everything he had done was to ensure that Spock was accepted. He had trained his son in the Vulcan way. He had made it so there was nothing to question in Spock. He had made it so that his son could rule without contest. Had he done the wrong thing? He had wanted Spock to master the flaws that Sarek saw in him, and Spock had excelled in all things. In his schooling, his own control. Spock had mastered everything. How had he really failed his son so completely?

He stepped towards Amanda, reaching out to touch her. She recoiled from him.

"I've dealt with this for 30 years Sarek. You, you above all else. It has always been your rule. Your way. You've hurt me, physically, but still I've stayed. I've been your obedient human wife. But no more. You've destroyed us Sarek. You've destroyed yourself. I won't allow you to tear down the one thing I have left. My son." She was silent a long moment, before she spoke up again, this time her tone was resolved, and Sarek felt a coldness descent upon their bond. Freezing him out.

"You are punishing him for your own failures."

There. It was out. Thirty-years of anger, hurt and betrayal, a lifetime of repressed and silenced emotions. Amanda felt a twisted sense of satisfaction amid her tumult of emotions at the expression on her husband's face. Gone was the mask of indifference he always wore, and in its place…

Regret. And sorrow. And pain. Good. He deserved to hurt, just as she and Spock had been hurting for years in silence.

Just as quickly, Amanda turned, slamming open the chamber doors. The sound echoed throughout the fortress. She exited quickly, leaving her husband staring after her and standing in the corridor.

II

Nyota Uhura considered herself a strong woman. She worked her way out of Africa to graduate at the top of her class at the University of Tbilisi. She'd done in two years what it took everyone else to accomplish in four. She had distinguished herself as the best of the best during her post-graduate work at MIT, and she'd fought for her place at the top of the best cadets at Starfleet. She was not, by any accounts, a weak woman. She had even fought for and eventually won the heart of a creature everyone thought didn't have one. No, Nyota Uhura was a fighter. But there was nothing in all her years of training that had ever prepared her for this. Heartbreak.

Physical pain- no problem. She could take it like the rest of the boys. But this, emotional pain…it was too much. She had never known he was married. He never said anything about it. He had spoken of his childhood with her; he had talked about his mother and her love for him. He had talked of his passions, and of his regrets, and she'd opened herself up to him the same way. They had shared experiences with one another that no one else had ever had privilege too. She'd seen a side of him no one would ever see. But in their two years, six months, and four weeks (yes, she'd developed the same habit as he when it came to these matters) he had never once uttered the fact that he was married.

It hurt. Like someone had taken a knife and ripped her heart out, threw it on the floor and stepped on it.

It was something the brilliant, beautiful, strong Nyota Uhura had never dealt with before. And she had no idea where to start.

It seemed her lover had many secrets. And at this point, she didn't want to know anything else.

So it came as a shock to her, as she lay curled up in a corner of the massive room, shielding herself from the world outside, to hear another voice nearby. Female.

The voice became louder, as it got nearer, and it was calling her name. She didn't want to hear it. She just wanted it to go away. To leave her alone, in her own grief, her own loss, and her misery.

But the voice wouldn't let up, and she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up, and into the kind face of Amanda Grayson- Spock's mother.

Of all the people she'd have to see…Uhura couldn't figure out what the woman wanted. Maybe to tell her it was never gonna work? Or that she was never good enough for her son? Maybe she wasn't. Clearly, she wasn't Vulcan. And it was painfully obvious, after tonight that she wouldn't be. Spock had another. She was just another one of his many experiments into the human condition.

But somehow, she didn't think the woman in front of her wanted to rub it in. No, she'd hear Amanda out. Hear what she had to say about her son. And maybe it would help her move on.

Amanda looked into the big, brown, and wet, red- rimmed eyes of the young woman in front of her, and she felt a tug in her heart. Her son loved this woman, and by extension of him, she did too. Any woman who could get so close to her boy had to be special. And she'd seen firsthand how exceptional Nyota Uhura really was. Amanda herself knew had she been in the girl's position this evening, she wouldn't have been able to take it. That said something to her resilience.

But now, all shreds of that was gone, and it was obvious to Amanda the girl was emotionally broken. She would try to repair what she could. She had never met Nyota Uhura before now, and she could only do as a mother would. So she sat down next to the girl, wrapped her arms around her, and held her as she cried.

It took an hour before she started to speak. Two bodies, each hurting, huddled in a corner, with only each other for comfort. Amanda resolved to tell the truth. Seeing as how no one in her house seemed to know what the word meant anymore.

Uhura was quiet, listening to the older woman speak. Her own eyes still heavy with tears that no longer fell.

"You have made my son happy. He has not been that way since he was a baby. He spoke a great deal about you, and my only regret is that I have to meet you in this situation. I will answer your questions, I know you have many. Of which, upon coming to Vulcan, I had the same. Let me tell you a story…

Once upon a time, a young Earth woman fell in love. She fell in love with a stranger, someone not of her same world. The stranger began to pursue her, and he was strong, intelligent and charming. No one could see why the woman liked the stranger, everyone thought him cold and unfeeling. But the woman saw through that. She saw goodness where no one else could see. You see, the woman had always dreamed of a perfect love. She had wanted a man who could bring down the heavens and the stars for her. No other man seemed to be right. Until she met the perfect stranger. She gave in to his pursuits, and he vowed to make her his wife. She accepted his proposal. And he took her off with him, above the stars, leaving behind the world she knew. She arrived at her new home, alone, with only her stranger to greet her.

You see, she had grown up reading fairy tales, about beautiful princesses and handsome prices, castles and the like.

She had asked for a man who could give her the world, he did it. She has wished for a man who could give her the stars. He did it. She'd wished for a fairy tale, with a prince and a castle, and he had given it to her, and more.

You see, the Prince gave her everything. But when she got it, she realized that the most precious gift she'd ever received from him was the son she bore the next year.

The woman had wished on a fairy tale, but unlike the tale, sometimes reality brings grim truths. Happily ever after exists only for those willing to work and fight for it. But rarely does it really come true. Do you understand?

Uhura looked into the kind face of Amanda, and nodded slowly in comprehension. "Spock is the heir to Vulcan." This time it was Amanda's turn to nod.

Uhura was quiet again. After a while she looked up. "Did I ever have a chance? Did he ever love me?" she said softly.

Amanda felt her heart break. "Miss Uhura, I promise you my son loves you very much."

"Then why didn't he tell me?"

Now, it was Amanda's turn to be silent. "He did not want to hurt you. I know you may not believe me, but my son is many things. A liar he is not. He is a peaceful creature, who has had great injustices done to him because of his human mother. His heritage. He would not hurt anyone, or anything. He wanted to protect you. This I am sure of."

Uhura sighed sadly, and pondered her next question. "How long...," she hesitated "…How long has he been married?"

Now Amanda sat her up, to look directly into her eyes. "It is Vulcan tradition of the ruling class to bond children. Spock was seven when he was bonded to T'Pring. Until today, it was less than a real marriage, and more than a betrothal."

Uhura had stopped crying now, her heart replaced with a glimmer of hope. "Seven? So this was not his choice? Does he have to honor it? And why today? What makes today different from yesterday?" Her voice had risen, carried with desperation. Pleading eyes looked at Amanda.

Amanda drew a deep breath, and closed her eyes. This was the part she didn't want to come to. But she had no choice. She couldn't let Uhura think that Spock couldn't and didn't love her. But she also had to try to explain that this…whatever they wanted to call it that Spock had with T'Pring, wasn't by his choice.

"Nyota," Amanda started softly. "Has Spock ever talked you about Ponn Farr?"

"No. What is it?"

Amanda drew another breath. "Every seven years Vulcan's go into a sort of heat. Because they have chosen the path of logic, they have made many sacrifices. That also includes areas of …sexual dealings. It is their nature's way of preserving the species. It forces them to mate or die. During that time, they take a mate, or if they are already bonded, the bond draws them back to the mate they have, or the one that has been chosen for them. In Spock's case, that bonded is T'Pring. Spock's Ponn Farr has started early…a year before it was supposed to. It actually started the moment he arrived on planet. I noticed his increased anxiety when he first got home…I think you did too."

Uhura blushed, images of a half-naked Spock in the gym brushing across her mind. She nodded in understanding.

Amanda continued.

"When T'Pring presented herself, Spock really had no choice. By the time they…left…His logic was gone. Only his…physical…needs remained. During his Ponn Farr, he is not the Spock you know. He is physically drawn to T'Pring because of her proximity to him at the time. She was here. She is his bonded. Once they complete the bond, which occurs through the completion of…activities…it is permanent. Vulcans mate for life."

At this news a choked sob broke from Uhura, and she dissolved once again to tears.

"I've lost him…I've lost him forever…"

Amanda began to rock the girl still curled in her arms, as her own tears broke through as the hard truth hit her too.

Her son had lost his chance at happiness. It seemed there simply would be no peace for him, and not one, but two lives would be destroyed.

A while later, Amanda rose. She quietly helped Uhura into her pajamas and tucked the girl into the bed. The day had taken an emotional toll on the both of them. Uhura was already asleep.

And as Amanda let herself out the room, she couldn't help but think, if she had a daughter, the child would be just like the Nyota Uhura in front of her.

Author's Notes(s):

Thank you all for the reviews. There is a bit of calm in the middle of the storm here. It will be back in full force by the return of Spock to the fortress!

I have to laugh at some of the messages I've gotten over Spock "scenting" T'Pring. Lol. Vulcans are very clean creatures. I am merely suggesting that Spock can tell T'Pring's been…around.

And, if you want a hint at a possible ending to at least this part of the tale, I suggest you watch "The Paradise Syndrome" Season Three of TOS. The very last minutes of the show.

Again, don't forget, this is only part one to a three part series! So if you hate how it ends…remember what Amanda said in her story to Nyota.

I am thinking there are only a handful of chapters left…maybe three.