With Darkness as our Blanket
- by BiSciFiGuy -
Pairing: Harry P. & Draco M.
Genre: Drama/Romance
Rating: M (Violence, Gay themes and Explicit Language)
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or character histories or places or anything except my own plot. No copyright infringement is intended. I am not responsible for any underage readers who may come across this story.
A/N: It's been 25 days since my last update, I'm sorry for keeping you guys waiting. I got caught up in another project for a while and had some personal stuff that took some of my time. I promise to be more attentive in future.
A/N 2: A special thank you to Noddy11Feb for being my number one cheerleader and for listening to me rant about all the Draco/Harry hotness even though M2M does nothing for him. Love you.
Chapter 7: Missing.
Draco woke to the soft sounds of birds chirping outside the bedroom window. As his eyes opened he noticed how bright the bedroom looked and he realised he had never closed the curtains the previous night. He was so used to doing everything with magic that he couldn't even think to pull the lengths of fabric shut. Yet, he was so used to them being closed while he slept and it took him a moment to realise that Harry must have pulled them closed every night. At the thought of hi lover he automatically reached over and felt for the tanned body in the bed beside him. All his hands found however were cold sheets and Draco sat bolt upright, the sheet falling from his chest in a tickling flow that sent goose bumps all over his body. He remembered now:
He'd com storming into the apartment the night before, having rushed from the restaurant. He's had to get home as fast as he could for fear he might start crying. He'd made it to the apartment and had struggled with the key for a moment before he'd flung open the door. The apartment had felt alien and cold to him as he stood in the living room. He's heard the door open behind him and twirled around.
"I can't do this now Harry". But it hadn't been Harry to walk into the living room, it was Seamus. The Irishman had stood in the door for a moment, a sympathetic, shy smile on his face and Draco had felt his defences crack.
"Seamus, why are you…?" He'd asked, his voice breaking.
"Harry told me to look after you".
"He what?"
"He said I had to watch over you, so you don't get hurt in the muggle streets". Against his will Draco had felt his heart soften and pride bubbled up in him that Harry actually cared that much about him. But then he's remembered seeing Harry in another man's, no in a child's arms and the pride morphed into deep anger again.
"I have to leave, I can't believe he did that". He'd made for the door but Seamus had stood firmly in front of it.
"Draco, calm down".
"Don't tell me to calm down, he kissed another man, a fucking teenager for Merlin's sake".
Draco's eyes had looked his Irish friend up and down, Draco had left his wand at home for the meal. He had never been in a physical fight before and was sure that he hit like a six year old. But even he had known how to fight he was pretty sure that he could do nothing against the big Irishman.
"Yes Draco, he was kissing him but you haven't heard Harry's side of the story yet".
"I don't care about his side of the fucking story, he shouldn't have done it, I am leaving". Seamus stepped squarely in front of the door and took up a defensive stance, his feet slightly apart, his big frame almost obscuring the door.
"Yes I know, but you're upset now, you'll think better if you just get yourself under control". Seamus stepped forward and Draco had been afraid of him for a moment, he really was a lot bigger than Draco. Noticing the fear Seamus had held up his hand, palm outward.
"Don't tell me about control Seamus Finnigan, I was brought up to be poised".
"Fine, I'm sorry, but aren't you letting your poise slip?" At this Draco had actually considered flinging himself at his friend but instead he'd turned around and stormed off down the hall to slam the bedroom door behind him, locking it both with the key and with a locking charm.
"Don't think you're sneaking out you little ferret, I'll stand right here all night if I have to. You aren't going anywhere". Seamus called from the front door and Draco let out an exasperated groan before toppling over on the bed, feeling like a hormonal teenage girl and hating himself for it.
Now he was awake and alone. He carefully got up and made his way to the door. As he unlocked it he realised that he'd actually kicked Harry out of his own bedroom the previous night and cursed himself. When the door opened something white toppled over near his feet and he stared at it for a moment, why was there a pillow in the hall, he wondered as he headed to the living room. He was hoping to find Harry sleeping on the couch but instead found Ginny sitting there, a cup of coffee in her hands.
"Oh, you're up, would you like some coffee?" She asked, her eyes were a bit puffy and Draco was sure she had hardly slept the previous night.
"Yeah, thanks". She waved her wand and Draco heard the kitchen come to life, when the cup floated into the room Draco took it and gratefully sipped from it.
"I'm glad you guys sorted out your problems". Ginny smiled at him, clearly relieved.
"We didn't". He whispered.
"What, but you slept in your room last night".
"I slept there, didn't Harry sleep here?"
"No, when I got up he wasn't anywhere to be found and your door was locked so I assumed that you'd gotten back together". Draco felt confused as he looked at her.
"No, but didn't he come home with you?"
"Yeah but I was really drunk and fell asleep". Draco felt the slight twinge of worry start to live within him. He looked around the room as though Harry was hiding somewhere in the room and would pop out with a yell of 'Surprise' at any moment. But his face didn't appear, there was no yell. Only the silence. He looked at Ginny, her sleepy face had turned into a mask of worry.
"Maybe he just went out to get something for breakfast. I'll call him".
"How are you going to call him?" Draco felt confused again, if Harry wasn't home, how on earth was Ginny going to call him.
"He has a cell phone you know".
"A what?"
"A cell phone, it's this wonderful invention muggles have, you can call anyone, no matter where they are". Draco felt impressed despite himself, muggles did come up with good inventions. In the wizarding world the only way to communicate instantly was fire calling, which of course required a fire place. Ginny reached for the phone and quickly tapped its keys. Somewhere in the apartment Draco suddenly heard a song, it was some woman he'd heard on the radio –yet another amazing muggle invention, her strong voice was telling some man that she wanted a ride on his 'Disco stick'. Draco had no idea what a 'disco stick' was but he assumed it was something dirty. Ginny got up the moment the woman started singing and vanished down the hall. The song stopped and she called to him to put the phone back on its cradle.
"Okay, so he didn't take the phone". She said when she returned, dropping the tiny black thing on the couch next to Draco, who marvelled at its design.
"Did he leave a note" she asked and they both got up to search the apartment. After about half an hour they met back in the living room, both empty handed.
"Oh Merlin, he's left". Draco suddenly realised and stormed to the closet in the bedroom to check if Harry's were still there. He flung open the doors and stared at the full closet.
"You locked him out last night, he wouldn't have taken his clothes". Ginny said from the door and Draco felt his cheeks turn pink. Of course, Harry wouldn't have been able to get in. Worry bubbled up in him again and he sank down on the bed.
"I'm such an idiot. Do you think I over reacted last night?" Ginny sighed and sat down next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"No, I would have reacted the same as you did".
"But I chased him away".
"He won't go far, he loves you Draco".
"How can he love me, he kissed that …that kid". Ginny sighed again and he felt her hand squeeze his shoulder.
"He was telling the truth you know?"
"What?"
"Tai kissed him, I was at the door before you were. Harry didn't want it".
"He was kissing him back".
"Draco, you may not have noticed but Harry tends to do whatever is expected of him".
"I…" Draco started but she held up her hand.
"Don't you get it. He didn't fight Voldemort because he wanted to, he did it because he had no other choice, the world expected him to. He came back to school year after year knowing that everyone looked at him like he was the hero and he just did it".
"What?"
"Yes, Harry does a lot of things just to please other people, it's not like he does it for attention, he just doesn't know any better. Even his relationship with you during our school years was dictated by other people".
"How?" Draco felt shocked, he'd always assumed Harry had revelled in the attention, had gone looking for trouble because he knew it would bring him fame.
"I'm sad to say it but it was because of us, well especially Ron. We all thought you were a bad influence and Harry just hated you because we did, because we expected it of him". Draco looked up at her, he felt tears form in his eyes, she smiled at him.
"He told me that once, just before he went on that mission of his. It was the day before the wedding and he'd told me he didn't want to date me anymore because he was scared I might get hurt. I accepted it, I loved him like no other boy. We sat in the garden late that afternoon and he told me how he regretted not trying harder to be your friend".
"I could have tried harder too, but that first time he rejected me I felt so humiliated, so unwanted. Perhaps I'd already fallen in love with him when I introduced myself". Draco quickly proceeded to tell her about the first time he'd seen Harry and how strange his heart had felt when he did.
"You know, Harry told me about that too. He regrets a lot of things but most of all he regrets what happened in sixth year". Draco cringed at the memory of the pain he'd felt when Harry's Sectumsempra curse had struck him. Not even the hurt he'd felt under his father and Voldemort's wands had been as painful as that simply because the wounds had hurt him physically but the intend behind them had hurt his heart. They both sighed and stared at the wall.
"Why are you sitting like that?" Seamus asked groggily from the doorway.
After filling Seamus in on what had happened they decided to wait for another hour, until midday, and if Harry hadn't returned by then they would go out to look for him. As they waited in the kitchen for the eggs and bacon to cook Seamus looked Draco in the eye from across the table, Ginny noticed the look and frowned.
"Draco, I'm sorry about what I said last night".
"Well, if you hadn't guarded the door I would be the missing one".
"No, I'm not apologising for that, I'm apologising for calling you a ferret, I know how you hated being called that in school, especially after what that death eater professor did to you". Draco cringed again at the memory but waved it off.
"Old habits have a way of coming out when one is upset". Seamus was about to reply but Ginny cut him off with a glare.
"I hope you controlled yourself, you know you can't get mad".
"Yes dear, I was calm. Ask Draco". Ginny turned her head in his direction and Draco nodded, casting a questioning look at them both. Seamus bit his lip for a moment before speaking.
"During the attack at Harry's party I got hit by one of those cutting curses". Draco nodded.
"Well, it kind of hit me in a rather sensitive spot. Draco frowned for a moment before he realised what Seamus meant and he had to fight the urge to grab his own crotch in sympathy. He knew what it looked like when a cutting curse hits someone.
"So, there was quite a bit of damage and it takes about two years to re-grow… all of it. And during that time I have to keep my blood pressure down because the pressure could keep the potion from working right". Draco scrunched up his face at the thought.
"So how do you two… you know?"
"We don't". Ginny said a little to quickly and Draco cast her a sympathetic glance.
Just after midday the three of them set off to find Harry, deciding to stick together the three of them made their way out of the apartment. At the door Draco turned to grab his keys when he noticed the fireplace and he paused.
"Harry vanishes into the Floo sometimes, he says he's going to get air. Do either of you know where he goes?". They both shook their heads.
"We didn't even know he used the Floo anymore".
"I'll bet he's wherever it is he goes, but lets go looking. He might be somewhere else". Draco shook his head and closed the door.
***
Draco knew Harry better than either of them actually knew. Harry had in fact travelled through the floo network again to meet Hermione. He'd left early that morning, before anyone was up. He'd whispered his destination to the Floo and was off. He stepped out of the fire place and walked along the path. It was peaceful, all around him it was beautiful. He found Hermione and plopped down next to her. The grass felt good beneath his fingers and he dug his fingers into the soft earth. In the distance he saw the all familiar building and he sighed before turning to her.
"It's been a long time".
"Yes, it has. How have you been?"
"I'm doing better thanks, but the relationship with Draco isn't going so well".
"Why, what happened?" Harry quickly proceeded to tell her about what happened the previous night, with strong emphasis on the fact that he never wanted to kiss Tai.
"I'm sure he will come around. He will come to realise that you were telling him the truth. He loves you and nothing you can ever do will change that".
"He gave back the ring Hermione. I don't know if he'll take me back".
"Just be honest with him. That's the best way to go about a relationship".
"Thanks". For several minutes they were silent before she spoke again.
"Have you told him about the Creep?"
"No, I told you, I am not going to tell him about that".
"Merlin Harry, you have to be honest with him. You can't expect this relationship to last if you keep on lying to him".
"But that is just it Hermione, I don't expect the relationship to last. I have sixteen days left". The words caught in his throat, he tried his best not to think about it but still counted down the days like a child waiting for Christmas or a birthday to come up.
"If you don't tell him, you might spend those sixteen days fighting".
"I don't want him to stay with me because he takes pity on me. I want him to stay because he loves me".
"Fine Harry, do whatever you want. I still think you should be honest".
"If Ron were here and you were in my position, would you tell him. Would you say that you were dying only to have him flutter around you, terrified whenever you go to sleep that you might not wake up. Would you want him to count down the days until you die, knowing that soon you'll be gone. Would you get pregnant again knowing that you were going to die, thus making him a promise you can never keep?" Silence fell around them again and Harry dug his fingers between the blades of grass again.
"No that I think about it, it's easy for me to judge what you do. I'm not the one dying, you are and you should choose whether or not to hurt the one you love".
Harry felt a searing pain explode up his leg, like flames running up from his foot up to his hip, he gasped loudly and fell back on the ground. Moaning loudly and clutching at his right leg. It throbbed violently, the skin felt as though it was being torn from his leg. The sky started swimming above him, the clouds turning into a swirling mass of white on blue. Just as suddenly as the pain appeared it vanished and he took a deep shaking breath.
"Did you have an attack?"
"Yes". Harry replied while pulling himself back into a shaky sitting position.
"Why, isn't the potions supposed to stop them?"
"It is, but I missed my dosage this morning, Draco had me locked out of the room last night". The thought of the previous night caused Harry to feel panicked again.
"I don't know what to do Hermione".
"Well, whenever Ron and I were mad at each other he'd usually come up with some grand gesture to apologise. Even when I knew I was the one who was at fault he'd always appear somewhere with roses, or a book or some other thing. But it wouldn't just be about the gift. He'd always do something wild, like when he jumped from the ministry building roof with that rare copy of that Runes book?" Harry did remember it well, Ron had been very secretive about it all and had scared the hell out of both him and Hermione. Both thinking he was trying to kill himself, both forgetting he was an experienced wizard.
"A grand gesture?" Harry mused for a second before jumping up. He thanked his friend and was off running back to the Floo network. He knew exactly how to get Draco back and with a gentle pat on his pocket to make sure he still had the rings he called out his destination and was gone in a flash of green flames.
***
It was nearly dusk when Draco and his friends settled on a bench in the park not far from Harry's apartment. Seamus and Ginny were both tired from the hours of fruitless searching for their friend. They'd been everywhere they could think Harry might have gone and had even started searching in random places, even places they knew Harry would never go, like the kinky adult shop called: "Leather Bitch", they had been in an hour before. They'd gone in sceptical that Harry would be there and had come out certain that he'd never go in there and more than a little shell shocked at shat they had seen in the bondage themed shop.
Ginny turned to Draco where they sat on the bench and gently folded her arm around his thin shoulders.
"We'll find him, don't worry".
"I know. I'm just worried he might have gone back home and found us gone. What if he thought I'd left him". Ginny considered this for a moment and after a whispered conversation with her boyfriend she turned back to Draco and smiled lightly.
"We think you should head home, he might be waiting for us".
"I can't, I have to help you find him. And besides I'll go crazy if I have to sit around waiting for him and he doesn't come back".
"We have to try Draco, you said it yourself, he might make the wrong assumption if he goes back and finds the place empty". Reluctantly Draco agreed and set off down the street. Ginny called something after him but her words were lost on the wind.
The march up the stairs to the apartment door felt like the longest walk Draco had ever taken, he feared going into the apartment and finding a letter posted somewhere telling him to fuck off. At first he'd been reluctant to live with Harry, now however he couldn't bear the thought of being without his brunette lover. He opened the door and stepped into the living room. The apartment felt oddly vacant and Draco let out a shaking breath. He needed something to calm his nerves. He made his way to the kitchen and flicked the kettle to life. It started puttering slowly and Draco heard a door slam shut. He started and stared out into the apartment. Someone was in the apartment. He pulled out his wand and carefully walked down the hall. The sound repeated itself and he realised it was coming from the bedroom. He knew almost instinctively that it was Harry. He had to bit his lip to keep himself from calling out even though he really wanted too. The sounds from the bedroom kept his voice back, it sounded as though Harry was packing up his trunks. Getting ready to leave. Perhaps he had come back to get his things and leave Draco. Disappointment tore at his heart as he made his way to the door but the disappointment was coloured with relief as well. Even if Harry was planning on leaving the relationship at least Draco knew he was okay.
He pushed open the door slowly expecting to see Harry rushing around the room tossing clothes and other things into trunks. Instead he found Harry sitting at the foot of the bed. He wore a sheepish smile as Draco entered. On the bed between their pillows was a big bunch of yellow and red tulips –Draco's favourite flowers. On the rest of the bed lay the biggest box Draco had ever seen, it covered most of the queen sized bed, some familiar smell drifted from the box but Draco couldn't identify it. He looked back to Harry. The brunette smiled at him with an innocent, little boy smile before standing up and walking towards the blonde. The smile widened into an apologetic one and he held up the silver ring.
"I know I was an ass, I never should have let Tai kiss me. I didn't want it he just caught me off guard. I'm really sorry". Slowly he lowered himself to the ground, onto one knee and lifted the ring in both hands, offering it up in his outstretched palm.
"Will you wear my ring again?" He asked simply and stared up at Draco with shimmering eyes and Draco felt his heart melt again. This brunette was indeed everything he wanted even though he was never the romantic type he can't resist Harry's charm.
"Of course I will. I love you way to much to let you slip through my fingers". Draco whispered and held out his hand for Harry to slip the ring on.
"I though we weren't…".
"Shut up and put the thing on". Harry smiles as he slips the ring over Draco's finger.
"Now tell me what you got me". Harry takes his hand and leads him to the bed, the lid suddenly flips off and sticks itself against the wall. Draco turns and stares at Harry, who is holing his wand pointed at the bed.
"You're…".
"Yeah, I couldn't get the box from the shop without shrinking it". Draco smiled as he turns to the open box and his breath catches in his throat. The box is filled to the brim with hundreds of different pieced of chocolate. Small balls and squares of the sinful food stare up at Draco as he stares right back. That had been the familiar smell. He fells himself drawn to the box.
"You know, you can't just buy me a huge box of chocolates every time you screw up".
"Yes I can, because I know it'll get you all mellow again".
"That's true, but I mean you cant buy me this much chocolate unless you want me to become gloriously fat". Harry laughs and pulls Draco to him, stuffing a tiny ball of Swiss chocolate into the blonde's mouth.
"Shut the hell up and kiss me". Harry leans in and kisses Draco's chocolate covered lips, tasting the dark chocolate as Draco's tongue flicks into his mouth.
Later as they lay naked between glittering chocolate wrappers Draco stretches, noticing the chocolate smudges on his arms and his pillow. A little voice is screaming in his head, telling him that he forgot something but he is too content in Harry's arms to really care what it is and he closes his eyes, ready for a good night's rest after the work out they'd just had. Suddenly the voice screams in his head, making its message crystal clear. Draco shoots upright in bed making Harry's arm flop down on his lap. Harry lifts his head and groggily stares at Draco.
"What the hell?"
"Oh fuck, I was supposed to let Ginny and Seamus know if you came back to the apartment". He reached for the phone and lifts it into his lap before realising that he had no idea how to actually use it even though he'd seen Harry use it several times.
"I'm sure they're fine, we haven't been back that long". He turns and looks at the clock on his wall and gasps.
"Shit, its almost nine, we've been in bed for three hours". He reaches over and dials a number, his arm brushing against Draco's sensitive cock, making the blonde gasp and the flesh grows hard again.
"Merlin, you are insatiable aren't you?" Harry whispers before Ginny answers the call.
As they wait for their friends in the living room Draco apologises for the first time, he knows its not really necessary but something compels him to do it.
"I didn't really mean to lock you out. The alcohol got to me".
"I know, it doesn't matter. I was fine". Draco remembers what he saw that morning and he turns to Harry.
"Why was there a pillow on the floor in the hall?" Harry blushes and touches Draco's hand.
"I missed you, and the living room is kind of far from the bedroom. I wanted to be close to you so I spent the night on the floor in front of the bedroom door". The blush on Harry's cheeks turn deep red and Draco leans in to kiss him since he is utterly speechless.
***
The next morning Harry found his Draco in the kitchen again, he smiles as he notices that the blonde is dancing to some unheard music.
"No radio this morning?" Draco yelps and turns around a spatula in his hand.
"No, People are sleeping".
"What are you doing?" Harry asks as he steps close, there is a strange smell in the kitchen.
"I'm making breakfast".
"By hand?".
"Yeah".
"So what is that smell?". Harry steps up behind his lover and slips his arms around the skinny body, slowly snaking his hand down the front of Draco's body and cradling his package in his hand. Draco moans as Harry carefully squeezes the soft flesh in his grasp and feels it twitching and start to grow beneath his ministrations.
"Merlin, are you guys making breakfast or shagging?" Seamus asks from the door and Harry thankfully lets go of Draco's hardening cock before they turn to face their friend.
"Why can't we do both at the same time?". Draco asks as he holds up the spatula and Seamus cringes and tilts his head back into the hall.
"Ginny, we're going out for breakfast".
"What, why?" She cries from the bathroom.
"Because Harry and Draco are making breakfast together".
"So what's wrong with that". She cries back and they hear the bathroom door open.
"They're fucking on the counter with the spatula". Harry and Draco look at him, incredulous.
"Oh, I'll get dressed then". She smiles at them as both she and her boyfriend step into the room, "What is that smell?" She asks as she sits down.
"Fine fuck, I burned the damn breakfast". Draco cries and replaces the spatula with his wand and with a wave the breakfast starts cooking itself. Harry laughs and leads his lover to the table. Soon bacon smells are filling the room.
All through breakfast Ginny and Seamus cast each other random glances, little nods that pass between them only to have the other person reply with a shake of the head. Harry follows the exchange curiously until the dishes begin clearing themselves from the table.
"What is up between the two of you?" Draco looks up at Harry before turning his gaze to their friends. Seamus cast another nod across the table and for the first time it is answered with a nod.
"We have something to tell you". Ginny says and again Seamus nods.
"Since Seamus and I still have our little problem to sort out". Harry frowns and Seamus quickly recounts the story he'd told Draco the day before, the blush on his cheeks so strong it seemed to heat up the room.
"So having children is out of the question for us, at least for the next year and Ginny really wants to have a child'. He looks at her and she continues at his cue.
"It's actually more about the experience of having a child. You know, feeling another person growing inside you, giving birth to that same person and…" She smiles dreamily and seems to forget for a moment what she was going to say.
"Okay, so why are you telling us this?" Draco asks form Ginny's left and pulls her from her little fantasy.
"Oh yeah. We were talking yesterday and since we both love you… Well, I'd like to be your surrogate".
A/N: Thank you to all of you who reviewed or added this story to one of your lists. You are all awesome!!